by Betty Bolte
"Why don't we both go?" Evelyn fiddled with the paper in her hands. "We'll make a day of it."
"A lovely idea, Miss." Peggy retrieved the paper from Evelyn's trembling fingers. "When do you wish to make the trip?"
"To-morrow. We'll set out early and plan to stay at my parents' house for the evening." Evelyn folded her arms, tapping one hand on her elbow. "I think I'll carry some flowers to them as a gift."
"Excellent. I'll pack the little one's travel bag."
Evelyn dropped her hands to her side. "Very good. I'll have Jack ready the carriage and prepare to accompany us."
The next morning, as the sun peeked over the horizon, they stepped into the phaeton, Evelyn driving while Peggy held Jim. Jack rode a bay gelding, keeping a watchful eye on the ladies. Evelyn had left Jemma to manage the household and feed the brothers as they finished up outside. In all honesty, she hoped they'd be done and gone by the time she returned. Ethan had become a nuisance, more so since Nathaniel no longer attended her. Her cousin still seemed to harbor feelings for her, but she did not share the same tender regard for him.
They arrived at the print shop shortly before noon. Charlestown bustled with activity, the streets busy with men on horseback, carriages and wagons trundling by, and people in general going about their business. The warm spring air carried the combined scents of their efforts: baking bread, leather, perfume, and the ever present smell of the sea. Dogs barked from somewhere out of sight. An elegantly attired gentleman led a pet deer by a long red leash past her carriage as she climbed down.
"What a sight, that." She shook her head, grinning up at Peggy. "Wait here. I'll only be a moment."
Checking both directions before braving the flowing crowds, she darted toward the shop. Hesitating for a breath, she glanced at her gown, uncomfortably aware she'd chosen the one she'd been wearing when Nathaniel had first expressed a desire to court her. The pale green skirts barely touched the tips of her matching low-heeled shoes. A bodice the color of a freshly sliced lemon had a v-shaped neckline where she had once worn his locket. Today, she wore the miniature her parents presented to her on her twenty-first birthday five years before. Would he notice? Did it matter? Taking a deep breath, she pushed the door open, a bell jingling above her head. Ink, with its tang and bitter aroma, scented the interior, making her cough.
Nathaniel had given her a tour of the shop during one of her previous visits. She trailed her gaze around the space, the memory of the day vivid in her mind. He'd acted so very gallant and obliging, furthering his own aims while pretending to do the exact opposite. Stay versus leave. She sighed at her folly in trusting him as she spied Sawyer working at the press, which occupied the rear of the public room.
To one side stood the two oblong wooden cases divided into compartments to hold each letter of the alphabet. The upper case, mounted at eye level on an angle for easy access—according to Nathaniel—contained the capital letters, small capitals, and accented letters. The lower case, positioned on a flat surface beneath the other one, held the small letters, points of punctuation, spaces for separating words, and quadrats for making blanks in the line of text. She knew more about printing than she'd ever desired to know, but Nathaniel had been so pleased she'd surprised him with a visit, he wanted to show her everything.
Frank emerged from the back room, stuffing an ink stained rag into a leather apron pocket. "Welcome, Miss Evelyn. To what do I owe the pleasure?"
"I'd like to place this advertisement in your next edition, if you don't mind." She pulled out the paper, unfolded it, and smoothed the page on the hard wood surface. Pride mingled with elation as she pushed the sheet toward Frank. "My school is ready to open."
"Congratulations." He perused the contents and nodded. "Nathaniel is putting the next edition together now. I'll make sure he includes your notice."
The mention of her man's, rather Nathaniel's, name sent a spike of longing and sadness through her heart. She met Frank's knowing gaze and gulped. Nathaniel was here. She knew he would be. Or at least surmised so. But knowing it and being in the same space proved quite different.
"See that he does." She tried a smile but her lips stiffened. "How is he?"
She'd not meant to ask such an imprudent question. She mentally shook herself. She'd been the one to end their courtship. She had no right to inquire as to his state of mind or being.
"Ask me yourself." Nathaniel appeared from the back room, tall and handsome and his gaze locked on her person. Lines spread from the corners of his eyes and a deep groove etched between his brows. Tense and tired, he studied her for a moment, his gaze flicking down and then meeting hers. A slight frown revealed he had indeed noticed she didn't wear his locket. On a sigh, he studied her for a long moment. "I've missed you, Lyn."
She sucked in a breath in a vain attempt to quiet her pulse rate, a direct reaction to his rich bass voice. Lifting her chin a hair, she prepared to defend her heart from the onslaught of desire and confusion consuming her. "I've been very busy, as you must imagine, so have not had time to miss any one."
He nodded slowly, once, then again. "I am doing well, thank you for your query on my behalf."
"As am I." She must remain calm despite the thundering in her ears, the perspiration in her palms, and the urge to move into his arms. "Frank has my advertisement for you to work on."
"You're ready to accept students? I'm sure you're very happy."
He didn't congratulate her or even sound as though he genuinely expressed happiness on her behalf. But then why would he? He wanted her to uproot her life and travel into the wilderness without any promise of a future together. She reminded herself that she had to look out for her own interests and those of her family. Even though she'd like nothing better than to feel his arms around her, his kiss on her lips.
Frank cleared his throat, a raised brow indicating his desire to interrupt. "Will there be anything else, Miss Evelyn? I'm afraid I must meet Emily at her shop in a few minutes to make arrangements for our excursion to France next month."
"France? I hadn't heard you'd decided to take your trip abroad." Evelyn focused on Frank, grateful for an excuse to not look at Nathaniel. "Will you travel with Tommy, too?"
Surely not. Such an adventure could prove detrimental to the child's health, perhaps even fatal should he contract some foreign illness while visiting other countries. Many risks abounded in their own country. She saw no purpose in courting ailments from other lands.
Frank shrugged. "We have many questions yet to answer."
"I'd be happy to have him in my home. He's so young and there seems little reason to risk his health on such a dangerous trip." Evelyn loved children, one of the reasons she looked forward to having so many young girls in her household. The idea of risking the baby's life onboard a ship at sea for pleasure had her shaking her head. Between the dangers of storms, pirates, and lack of fresh food, surely it wouldn't be in the child's best interests. "He'd make a companion for my son, as well."
"I'll convey your offer to my wife." Frank nabbed his hat from a peg by the door. "I'll be back, Nathaniel, in about an hour to proof the type."
Nathaniel nodded as he picked up the paper from the table. "I'll have this done by then."
"Excellent." Frank tipped his hat to Evelyn and then left the office.
Evelyn found herself staring into Nathaniel's eyes. When he regarded her with affection as he was doing, she had a sense of coming home to a warm embrace. Of safety and security unlike any she experienced with any other man.
"Did you need anything else, Lyn?"
She swallowed, stretching the silence further while scrambling for the right words. She needed him. Longed to follow Peggy's advice if only... She couldn't. "No, I do not believe so."
"It's kind of you to offer to care for Tommy in their absence." Nathaniel fiddled with the paper in his hands, reminding her of how very clever he could be with those strong fingers.
"One more mouth to feed won't make much difference." She forced her ga
ze away from his, sweeping the room until she spotted Sawyer contemplating them with humor evident in his expression. She stiffened, irritated by the entire situation. "I must go. It was nice to see you."
He smiled and inclined his head. "Until next time."
How many more times might she run into him when she came to town? Perhaps she should stay home until he left. Hide from unwanted encounters which could only serve to stir her senses and emotions, and disrupt her carefully laid plans. Only one thing for her to do.
She fled as gracefully as possible.
Chapter 33
Several days later, Nathaniel rode Jingo out to pay a spontaneous visit on Evelyn. He rehearsed his little speech as his horse trotted over the packed earth. Dust puffed from under Jingo's hooves with each stride. A canvas sack held his peace offering, bouncing against the roan's shoulder and bumping his knee.
After what seemed like hours he reined his mount to a halt in her barnyard. In one sense, the place seemed a home to him. But the fact remained it wasn't the place but the person who represented his home. Every aspect of Evelyn meshed with what he'd hoped for a new helpmate and lover. If only he could reason with her, make her understand his view of the matter. To accept his offer. Jack emerged from the barn and marched toward him, his long stride making quick work of crossing the yard.
"Good day, Jack." Nathaniel dismounted, dropping to the ground with the ease of an accomplished rider. He untied the sack from the ring on the saddle, and patted Jingo's sweaty neck. "Will you see to Jingo for me? He could use some water."
"Yes, sir. I'll take care of him." Jack took the reins in one hand, preparing to lead the animal into the barn. "Will you be staying the night?"
How he'd love to. He held no illusion she'd receive him with open arms. Not after what she considered his lies and betrayal. Memories of previous nights spent together on her property flashed through his mind and he shook his head to clear them away. "No, I'll be heading back in a little while."
Jack nodded and led Jingo away. Nathaniel watched the pair, the tall dark-skinned man and the pale reddish-brown gelding, disappear into the shadows of the aisle. Then he hurried to the manor house and Evelyn.
The door swung open as he bounded up the steps. Peggy stood in the open door, grinning like she'd never stop. He whipped his tricorn from his head, and bowed in greeting to the young woman.
"Mr. Williams, you don't need to bow to the likes of me." Peggy's face had flushed a bright pink. "It's not proper."
Nathaniel held his hat in one hand as he studied the embarrassed servant. "I understand why you say so, but to me you are still a lady. I always bow to a lady."
"I'm no lady, sir." Peggy had turned crimson as she shook her head emphatically. "I'm simply a servant girl trying to get by."
"One day, you'll be free from your debt to Miss Evelyn." Nathaniel moved closer to Peggy and the entrance to the house. "Then you will enjoy the privileges of being a woman equal to any other."
She shrugged and stepped back. "Come on in here. Miss Evelyn is in the music room."
He followed her down the passage, elegantly decorated with vases of flowers set out on occasional tables and sturdy chairs spaced along the oriental carpets. She left him at the door to the room where his woman—he couldn't help but think of her as his—sat at the spinet playing a mournful tune. A melody commonly played at funerals. Why would she choose such a depressing piece?
She espied his entrance and jerked her hands from the keyboard, one flying to her throat. "Nathaniel, what brings you all the way out here? Is something amiss?"
He crossed to stand by her, her frame rigid, poised to rise and flee if he said the wrong thing. She dropped her hand and revealed she still didn't have his locket on. A bad sign. He swallowed as he extended a hand, inviting her to come to him.
"The only thing amiss is us." He wiggled his fingers in invitation. "Will you sit with me?"
She glanced at his hand, then at his face, a question evident in her eyes, before placing her hand in his. He tugged her to her feet and her demeanor changed to wariness. He squeezed her fingers and led her to the settee positioned against the wall opposite the door. Silently, she settled on the brocaded seat, arranging her long skirts with a trembling hand. He sat beside her, without letting her go. If he had his way, he'd never release her.
"I have a little something I'd like to give you." Nathaniel put the bag on her lap, and opened the neck to reveal a ripe melon. "It's not much, but it symbolizes my caring for you with a sweet fruit. When you eat it, which I trust you will, I hope you'll think of me."
She studied him for a while, finally permitting a smile to grace her lips. "I enjoy melons. Thank you for bringing me such a fine gift."
"I'm pleased you like it." Nathaniel's tension eased with her ready acceptance of his present. "There's something more I'd like to give you."
Tilting her head to one side, she raised a brow. "What might that be?"
"Lyn, I want to apologize to you for not being more forthcoming regarding my plans." He peered at her, hoping he didn't mangle his speech. "When I came here, I had every intention of staying only as long as necessary before heading west. The frontier beckons with the promise of an incredible adventure and possibility of making my fortune."
"You've said as much before, Nat. What does that have to do with me?"
"I will not leave until June, as agreed. When I go, I'd like for you and Jimmy to accompany me."
She started shaking her head before he'd finished speaking. "We are not destined to be together. You want to travel and start afresh somewhere far away from here. I've just advertised for my school to open, as you know. I cannot abandon my dreams and hopes to pursue yours."
"We do belong together, my love. We're good for each other." He gripped both her hands, trying to share the urgency he felt. "You know you want to be with me, don't you?"
"I do, but here." She waved a hand as though to brush away his idea. "You could stay here with me."
"I would if my heart and soul allowed me to. I feel as though I'll bust if I don't move on."
"Then we have nothing more to say on the matter." She pulled her hands free and folded them in her lap. "We have to accept the reality that you will leave and I will stay."
"This isn't over." Nathaniel noticed tears glistening in Evelyn's eyes. How could he stand to leave his heart in South Carolina when his soul demanded he continue on his quest? "We're not over. We'll find a way. I promise you."
Chapter 34
Time had a way of slipping by when Evelyn kept busy. Knowing Nathaniel planned to leave in a little more than a month weighed on her heart. In the past week, she had accepted two young girls into her school. She had room for ten. At the present rate, she'd fill her school within a month of opening. The two students anticipated arriving before the start of formal classes in the fall. Until then, she would have to survive using the money she earned from selling her flowers at the market in town.
Her thoughts strayed to the act of educating the girls. When she tried to imagine the scene, she could readily see Peggy working with the students, demonstrating how to neatly stitch a sampler or cut out a dress and sew it together. When she attempted to envision working with them to learn about history or mathematics, her mind retreated from inserting her personage into the picture. Hearing echoes of Walter's harangue did not help her confidence at all. Uncertainty had wormed its way into her psyche. Doubt became her closest friend.
The distant rumble of thunder alerted her to an approaching storm. She went to the window looking out the front of the house, but only saw a few clouds to the east. Moving through several rooms, she went to the west side of the house, peering out the small parlor window. Charcoal clouds filled the sky, building and roiling while lightning flashed. A growl preceded a ground-shaking boom. She shivered as the air charged with portent. How she despised thunderstorms.
She went in search of her son, peeking into each room as she strode through the house. Climbing the curving
stairs, she wandered through the bedrooms. Finally, she located Peggy rocking Jim, crooning a ditty to soothe his fears from the noise outside. If only singing a song would ease her apprehensions.
"It's only a storm." Peggy maintained the motion of the chair as she looked at Evelyn. "Nothing to worry about, really."
"I try not to fret, but the lightning and thunder unnerve me every time." Evelyn crossed her arms, hugging her waist in a futile effort to hold onto her comportment. "I'm always afraid when the worst ones hit."
All her life, she'd dreaded their existence. Ever since she was a child, and a blinding flash of lightning struck the tree she had sheltered under during a sudden storm. She relived the resulting blast of sound and subsequent fire when the tree exploded over her, showering her with bits and pieces of the tall oak and its leaves. She'd been unable to move from where she'd curled up into a ball, hugging her knees and rocking with fear and shock. Her father had run to her from the barn, snatched her up and carried her inside the house. If he hadn't she might have died. Her mother held her for hours, hugging Evelyn on her lap, until she stopped crying and shaking from the ordeal.
"I understand, but we're safe inside." Peggy glanced at Jim's wide eyes then back at Evelyn. "Why don't you ask Jemma to make tea?"
"That's a fine idea." Evelyn brushed away the horrific memory and turned to retrace her steps, then paused to catch Peggy's attention. "Do you ever feel as though something bad is about to happen and you can't stop it because you don't know what it is?"
Peggy chuckled and smoothed Jim's long baby dress. "Feeling a mite superstitious today?"
Evelyn laughed and shook her head. "I suppose. I'll go see about the refreshments."
Walking through the house, she recalled many occasions when she had anticipated an event. A feeling of expectation, perhaps of a visitor or some kind of change in her life, often settled upon her mind and weighed upon her shoulders. Like when Amy had fallen down the stairs and skinned her knees when she slammed into the table and broke the large porcelain vase her mother had cherished. Or when Uncle Joshua had made an unexpected visit to the plantation to bring a special birthday gift to her father, the thorough bred stallion at the heart of her father's racing stock. What did the current premonition mean? A shudder moved across her back as she went down the stairs and out the back door.