by Seven Steps
My legs felt heavy, but, somehow, I managed to move them in the direction of my driveway.
It was so hard to walk away from him.
Why was it so hard?
I got to the front door and turned around.
Becks was still in the driveway. Watching me.
“Becks?” I called.
“Yeah?”
“I’m sure your grandfather would’ve been proud of you,” I said. “You’re something to be proud of.”
Becks looked at me for a long time. “You are too.”
And then, I opened the door and let myself in the house, feeling somehow like I’d changed since the last time I was here.
17
Monday afternoon, Calla sat with me at lunch, but that didn’t mean anything had changed between us. From the way she looked at everyone but me to her generally frosty disposition, I could tell she was still irritated.
“Are you going to be mad at me forever?” I asked, picking over my salad.
“Not forever. Maybe just until the end of time.”
I rolled my eyes. “That’s the same thing.”
“Then I guess I’ll be mad at you forever.”
My chest felt tight and cheeks turned hot, but I tried to keep my cool. This was my best friend, and I loved her.
Plus, I was tired of fighting. I missed Calla.
“We couldn’t afford to hire your mom to cater the carnival,” I said. “You knew our budget. Why would you get mad about it?”
“Because you could’ve used the money we’d collected to pay her. We would’ve gotten it back.”
“The money wasn’t for that.”
“Sometimes, Lily, I think you’re blind. Maybe get your head out of the books once in a while and look around you.”
I tried to ignore how much that comment stung. “What does that mean?”
She glared at me. Actually glared. My blood ran cold. I don’t think I’d ever seen Calla so upset.
“It means that there’s more to life than Kat Levy.”
Then, she grabbed her tray and stormed away.
I took in a deep breath, trying to calm my racing heart. I couldn’t believe she’d said that to me. Get my head out of a book? I’m blind? There’s more to life than Kat Levy? What did that mean? What did any of it mean?
I put my head in my hands, feeling tears well up in the back of my eyes. I was losing my best friend, and I didn’t even know what I’d done wrong.
“Is this a bad time? This seems like a bad time.”
A deep voice floated down from above me. Who was that? Becks? No, that wasn’t Becks’ voice. He’d decided not to sit with me today, instead choosing to sit across the room with Rose and her friends. What was with all my friends abandoning me today?
I tried to calm myself down and lifted my head.
Lucas Bright stood over me, nervously rubbing his hands together.
“I could come back,” he said. “I mean, unless you want to talk about it.”
He didn’t wait for me to answer before sitting down and facing me. He leaned forward slightly and laced his fingers together, as if he’d come all the way from the student council table just to listen to me and my problems.
I wasn’t 100 percent sure how I felt about that. A part of me was irritated that he’d interrupted my pity party, but another part of me desperately wanted to not be alone right now.
I sighed.
“I guess my friends and I aren’t having the best of days.”
Lucas nodded slowly. “You know what they say. When life gets all lemony, then throw in some sugar and make lemonade.”
I scoffed. “I’m pretty sure that’s not the expression.”
He shrugged and smiled. “I may have modified it a little.” Then, he held out his hand. “Lucas Bright. I don’t think we’ve been formally introduced.”
I shook his hand. It was soft and dry. “Lily McAlister.”
“We had AP Chemistry last year,” Lucas said. “I remember the back of your head.”
I chuckled. “And I remember you sitting behind me giving me all the answers to the test.”
“And I did that… how?”
“You kind of talked to yourself as you were working through the problems. Like a whisper speak sort of thing. It actually helped me pass the class.”
He grinned. “Well, I’m glad that my terrifying, personal flaw I’d hoped to hide for at least two dates inadvertently assisted you in passing the class. Serendipity, I guess.”
“I guess so.”
I looked over Lucas. He was handsome. Jet-black hair, glasses, long, lean frame, smart. I’d never had an actual conversation with him before now, but from what I knew about him, he seemed like a nice guy.
“I actually came over for two reasons. The first was to request a booth for the carnival.”
“I’m sorry, we’re full. There’s actually a waiting list in case anyone drops out last-minute.”
“Oh, okay. I guess that’s why they say the last bird loses the worm.”
Another round of soft laughter left my throat. “Isn’t it the early bird gets the worm?”
“Well, in this instance, I’m a little far from early, don’t you think?”
“Yeah. I guess you are.”
“If there are any openings in the future, please let me know. I think my booth could be a great contribution to your cause.”
“What was your booth going to be about?”
“My mom’s the Medical Director at the hospital. We were going to give out free flu shots and information about vaccine health. The hospital will donate a hundred dollars per person who gets vaccinated to Kat’s fund, up to one thousand dollars.”
My eyes lit up. “Wow, that sounds really cool.”
“I figured it was a double good cause. Donate to Kat and get people their flu shots, all at once. Plus, it’ll look awesome on my medical school résumé.”
“Is that what you want to be when you graduate? A doctor?”
“Definitely. I’ve wanted to be a doctor since I was a little kid. I’m hoping to join DFH one day.”
“DFH? Doctors For Humanity?”
“You know it?”
“Yes. You travel to different countries giving free and low-cost medical care. I want to do the same thing, but with Doctors Without Borders.”
He smiled. “Really? I don’t think I’ve ever met another person who wanted to spend the rest of their lives in third world countries.”
“I used to run a doctor’s clinic for my toys growing up. I’m like the original Doc McStuffins.”
He laughed out loud. “I won’t tell people you know about that show if you don’t tell people I know about that show.”
“Hey, we have to stay up on our pediatric care techniques.”
He nodded. “Yes, we do.”
I smiled at Lucas. He was sweet. And funny.
“You know, I think we’ll have room for your booth after all. It may be a tight fit, but I think we can make it work.”
“Thanks. I’ll let Mom know. She’ll be thrilled.”
“Cool.”
His gaze roamed over my face. A smile grew on his lips, and, for some reason, I found myself laughing. Actually laughing. I felt like a goof but, to my surprise, he started laughing too.
“I’m sorry,” I said. “I don’t know why I’m laughing.”
“No. It’s okay. Believe me, this is a little weird for me too. I’ve never asked a girl out before, if you can believe it.”
The laughter died on my lips. Now, my heart started to beat faster.
“You said you came over here for two reasons,” I said, my voice coming out in a croak. “What was the second?”
“Lily, I was wondering if you’d want to go get some ice cream or go to a movie or something. Someday. Of course, if you don’t want to I completely understand and acknowledge your right to choose because that is your choice and…” His mouth was running away with him, and his cheeks were turning tomato red.
I put my hand over his mo
uth to stop his yammering.
“Lucas.”
His brows rose.
“I’d like to go with you. For ice cream. Some time.”
I slowly removed my hand from his mouth, revealing his bright smile and soft gaze.
“Yeah?”
“Yeah.”
His smile grew, making my heart pound harder. I’d never had a guy ask me out before, and the fact Lucas had just asked me out was heady. Almost unbelievable.
“Friday night, maybe?” he asked. “We can go grab dessert.”
“Yeah. I’d like that,” I said, butterflies bursting forth in my stomach.
“Great. Awesome. Amazing. Well, I’m going to go before I talk myself into getting un-dated.” He stood. “I hope you make up with your friends. They’re really lucky to have you.”
I smiled, though I didn’t feel lucky right now.
“Thanks.”
“See you on Friday, Lily. I mean, I’ll see you in the hallways too and in study hall but like, Friday, officially. Okay, I’m shutting up now.”
We waved goodbye to each other, and Lucas walked away.
I turned back to my lunch.
Did that just happen? Did Lucas Bright just ask me out? And did I say yes? Was this my actual first date?
My insides were screaming. I couldn’t believe this was happening. I had to tell someone.
But who could I tell? Calla was gone. Still mad at me.
I looked over at Rose’s table, but she was too into her conversation with Becks to notice me. And he looked into their conversation too, sandwiched between Rose and Kimberly. I watched Rose put her hand on his forearm and laugh and something odd rose inside of me.
Like an itch I couldn’t scratch.
I pushed the feeling down. Rose and Becks were just friends. Just like Lucas and I were friends. They could do whatever they wanted. Just like I was doing. And I was going out on my first date this Friday with a sweet guy. I took a big bite of my sandwich, imagining all the possibilities.
18
Monday, after school, Becks drove me to The Trading Post. It was a large store in the center of town that had stuff we could use for both decorations and prizes for the carnival. Plus, I had this great idea for a photo booth, and I wanted to see if The Trading Post would rent us theirs for free. The one thing I’d learned while putting together this carnival was, it never hurt to ask.
We walked through the sliding glass doors and came face-to-face with aisles of every conceivable thing one could ever want for a party. Costumes, decorations, and party favors all broken down by theme. There was a Disney Princess aisle, a Harry Potter aisle, a Luau aisle. There was even a Star Wars aisle. The Trading Post was the place we came to for Halloween costumes. Last year, Rose came here for her kitty cat costume. I’d decided to design my own costume and ended up wearing a bonnet and a cape and going to Janet Lockland’s Halloween party as Jane Eyre. No one got the reference, so I ended up going back home, getting the book and walking around the party with it. Most people still didn’t get the reference.
“This place is awesome,” Becks said, making a bee line for the Star Wars aisle. “Do you remember when our parents dressed us up as Raggedy Ann and Andy when we were kids?”
“I remember crying because I wanted to be Jimmy Neutron.”
“I don’t think that either one of us had any idea who Raggedy Ann and Andy were.”
“Still don’t,” I said. “It’s cool, though. We got to be Dora and Boots the next year. That was cool.”
“Yeah. Cool for a five-year-old.”
We walked down the Star Wars aisle, checking out the Darth Vader tablecloths, Yoda masks, R2D2 cups, and balloons with C3PO’s metallic face on it.
Becks picked up a Darth Vader mask and reached his hand out to me.
“Lily, I am your father.”
I laughed out loud, then grabbed onto one of the shelves, hanging on for dear life. “No, No. That’s not true. That’s impossible!”
It was Becks’ turn to laugh now.
“Do you remember that weekend when we watched Star Wars three times in a row?” he asked.
I grinned. “Yeah. It was a week before you left.”
His smile dropped a bit then. Mine did too.
“Did you ever finish watching the rest of the series?” he asked.
I shook my head. “No. It felt, I don’t know, wrong to watch it without you. So, I didn’t try to.”
He took off his mask and nodded slowly.
A brief, awkward silence fell over us, then his eyes looked into the distance.
“There it is,” he said. He walked down the aisle, leaving me to trail after him.
A large rectangular box with the word PHOTOBOOTH hanging over it sat at the end of the aisle.
When we reached it, we both climbed inside.
“Cool,” I said.
I’d never been in a photo booth before, but it was just like I imagined it to be.
Dark, with a screen in front. There were more options than I was expecting, though. Every type of filter and stamp a person could ever dream of.
A text box popped up at the bottom of the screen, alerting me that my money was accepted and that I could take five pictures.
Money? I didn’t put in any money.
Becks climbed in and shimmied close, until our hips were touching.
“We should take a few pictures,” he said. “Just to try it out.”
He seemed to take up all available space in the small booth. My lungs grew heavy and my gut twisted. Was it from the small space, or was it because of Becks?
I reached forward and fiddled with the buttons, trying to distract myself from my wayward thoughts and my rebellious body.
“Any request?” I asked.
“Do they have anything sports related?”
I hit the categories button and then pressed the Sports category. There were a few filters to choose from. Football, soccer, track. I clicked on the baseball one, because it was the closest match to softball I could find.
“Okay,” I said, sitting back. “Here we go.”
The air grew warm, and my lungs nearly locked.
For some strange reason, I wanted to lean into him. I remembered our hug from the day before. It’d felt so amazing. I wanted to do it again. I wanted to feel his arms around me again. To have him hold me close.
I shook the thought from my head. I couldn’t think those things. This was Becks we were talking about. My friend.
What was up with me?
I cleared my throat and focused on the screen. It did a countdown from five, then flashed as it took our picture.
We didn’t get a preview, only a prompt to select our next photo.
Becks chose it this time. He leaned forward, picking something I couldn’t see. The temporary distance gave me a second to breathe, but it was only that. A second. When he sat back up, he seemed even closer. Which made the knot in my gut grow bigger.
What was happening to me? I wasn’t sure, but what I did know was I needed to get out of this booth, and fast.
The camera flashed and the screen lit again, prompting us for our next entry.
“Are you picking the next one?” he asked.
His eyes landed on mine. In the darkness, and at the angle he was sitting, I could only make out his lips and chin.
His lips seemed so full. So tempting.
I quickly looked away, heat flooding my cheeks.
“You choose,” I said.
“Okay.”
He chose one, then the next two after that. Then, the lights came on in the booth.
I quickly jumped out and huffed in the cooler air before he could see.
“Let’s see what we got,” he said. He reached into the small pocket, now filled with reels of photos, and handed them to me.
I eyed the first one. Then the second. Most of them were of me with a nervous smile, while Becks looked as cool as a cucumber. I chose the picture in the baseball frame and the second with the heart frame
and handed the rest to Becks.
Did I choose the heart frame or did he? I couldn’t remember, but just in case it was me, I wanted to keep it.
And if it was him... I didn’t want to think about what that meant.
“We should get back to the front of the store,” I said. “We still have to ask about Mr. Chow’s decorations.”
Becks slipped the pictures into his back pocket. “Yeah. Sure.”
We walked to the front of the store and talked to the owner, a tall man with thick black hair and glasses. Mr. Chow had owned The Trading Post since I was a little girl and he never seemed to get any older.
He didn’t give us a monetary donation, but he did promise to give a discount on anything bought for the carnival, and he said he’d allow us to use the photo booth that night free of charge.
It wasn’t the greatest donation ever, but I was super excited about the photo booth, and we had enough within our budget to cover the decorations with only the school provided money. And, whatever we couldn’t cover, we could ask the parents to bring.
Plus, there was always Sarah’s One Dollar Bonanza down the street, which had everything for one dollar all the time. I’m sure we could buy some decorations from there too.
I felt hopeful coming out of The Trading Post. Things were starting to come together.
Maybe this carnival would be successful.
Maybe not everything I did blew up in my face after all.
We walked to the car and climbed inside. This time, no air conditioner blew in my face when he turned the car on.
Today was the first day of autumn and, as if on cue, the weather had begun to cool down from the nineties to the high seventies.
Soon, it would be November and the carnival would be here. I tried not to get too nervous about the time frame.
“I’ve been thinking,” Becks said, pulling the SUV out into the street.
“Thinking about what?”
“About my booth.”
“You’re reconsidering painting?”
“No. Nothing like that. I just feel like it needs something.”
“Like what?”
“Well, no one’s going to buy a painting from a random guy. They don’t know if they’re getting an actual painting or stick figures.”