Si Klegg, Book 6

by John McElroy

  CHAPTER II. SI AND SHORTY COME VERY NEAR LOSING THEIR BOYS.

  ALL healthy boys have a strong tincture of the savage in them. Thesavage alternately worships his gods with blind, unreasoning idolatry,or treats them with measureless contumely.

  Boys do the same with their heroes. It is either fervent admiration, orprofound distrust, merging into actual contempt. After the successfullittle skirmish with the guerrillas the boys were wild in theirenthusiasm over Si and Shorty. They could not be made to believe thatGens. Grant, Sherman or Thomas could conduct a battle better. But themoment that Si and Shorty seemed dazed by the multitude into which theywere launched, a revulsion of feeling developed, which soon threatenedto be ruinous to the partners' ascendancy.

  During the uncomfortable, wakeful night the prestige of the partnersstill further diminished. In their absence the army had been turnedtopsy-turvy and reorganized in a most bewildering way. The oldfamiliar guide-marks had disappeared. Two of the great corps had beenabolished--consolidated into one, with a new number and a strangecommander. Two corps of strange troops had come in from the Army ofthe Potomac, and had been consolidated into one, taking an old corps'number. Divisions, brigades and regiments had been totally changed incommanders, formation and position. Then the Army of the Tennessee hadcome in, to complicate the seeming muddle, and the more that Si andShorty cross-questioned such stragglers as came by the clearer it seemedto the boys that they were hopelessly bewildered, and the more depressedthe youngsters became.

  The morning brought no relief. Si and Shorty talked together, standingapart from the squad, and casting anxious glances over the swirlingmass of army activity, which the boys did not fail to note and read withdismal forebodings.

  "I do believe they're lost," whimpered little Pete Skidmore. "Whatin goodness will ever become of us, if we're lost in this awfulwilderness?"

  The rest shuddered and grew pale at this horrible prospect.

  "That looks like a brigade headquarters over there," said Si, pointingto the left. "And I believe that's our old brigade flag. I'm goin' overthere to see."

  "I don't believe that's any brigade headquarters at all," said Shorty."Up there, to the right, looks ever so much more like a brigadeheadquarters. I'm goin' up there to see. You boys stay right there, anddon't move off the ground till I come back. I won't be gone long."

  As he left, the boys began to feel more lonely and hopeless than ever,and little Pete Skidmore had hard work to restrain his tears.

  A large, heavy-jowled man, with a mass of black whiskers, and wearing ashowy but nondescript uniform, appeared.

  "That must be one o' the big Generals," said Harry Joslyn. "Looks likethe pictures o' Grant. Git into line, boys, and salute."

  "No, it ain't Grant, neither," said Gid Mackall. "Too big. Must be Gen.Thomas."

  The awed boys made an effort to form a line and receive him properly.

  "Who are you, boys?" said the newcomer, after gravely returning thesalute.

  "We're recruits for the 200th Injianny Volunteer Infantry," answeredHarry Joslyn. "Kin you tell us where the rijimint is? We're lost.

  "Used to know sich a regiment. In fact, I used to be Lieutenant-Colonelof it. But I hain't heared of it for a long time. Think it's peteredout."

  "Petered out!" gasped the boys.

  "Yes. It was mauled and mummixed to death. There's plenty o'mismanagement all around the army, but the 200th Injianny had the worstluck of all. It got into awful bad hands. I quit it just as soon's I seehow things was a-going. They begun to plant the men just as soon'sthey crossed the Ohio, and their graves are strung all the way fromLouisville to Chickamauga. The others got tired o' being mauled around,and starved, and tyrannized over, and o' fighting for the nigger, andthey skipped for home like sensible men."

  The boys shuddered at the doleful picture.

  "Who brung you here?" continued the newcomer.

  "Sarjint Klegg and Corpril Elliott," answered Harry.

  "Holy smoke," said the newcomer with a look of disgust. "They've madenon-commish out o' them sapsuckers. Why, I wouldn't let them do nothin'but dig ditches when I was in command o' the regiment. But they probablyhad to take them. All the decent material was gone. How much bounty'dyou get?"

  "We got $27.50 apiece," answered Harry. "But we didn't care nothin' forthe bounty. We--"

  "Only $27.50 apiece. Holy smoke! They're payin' 10 times that in someplaces."

  "I tell you, we didn't enlist for the bounty," reiterated Harry.

  "All the same, you don't want to be robbed o' what's yours. You don'twant to be skinned out o' your money by a gang o' snoozers who'regittin' rich off of green boys like you. Where's this Sarjint Klegg andCorpril Elliott that brung you here?"

  "They've gone to look for the rijimint."

  "Gone to look for the regiment. Much they've gone to look for theregiment. They've gone to look out for their scalawag selves. When yousee 'em agin, you'll know 'em, that's all."

  Little Pete Skidmore began to whimper.

  "Say, boys," continued the newcomer, "you'd better drop all idee of that200th Injianny and come with me. If there is any sich a regiment anymore, and you get to it, you'd be sorry for it as long as you live. Iknow a man over here who's got a nice regiment, and wants a few moreboys like you to fill it up. He'll treat you white and give you twiceas much bounty as you'll git anywhere's else, and he's goin' to keep hisregiment back in the fortifications, where there won't be no fightin',and hard marches, and starvation--"

  "But we enlisted to fight and march, and--" interjected Harry.

  "Well, you want a good breakfast just now, more'n anything else, judgin'from appearances. Come along with me and I'll git you something to eat."

  "But we waz enlisted for the 200th Injianny Volunteer Infantry, and mustgo to that rijimint," protested Monty Scruggs.

  "Well, what's that got to do with your havin' a good breakfast?" saidthe newcomer plausibly. "You need that right off. Then we kin talk aboutyour regiment. As a matter of fact, you're only enlisted in the Army ofthe United States and have the right to go to any regiment you please.Tyrannical as the officers may be, they can't take that privilege of anAmerican freeman away from you. Come along and git breakfast first."

  The man's appearance was so impressive, his words and confident mannerso convincing, and the boys so hungry that their scruples vanished, andall followed the late Lieut.-Col. Billings, as he gave the word, andstarted off through the mazes of the camp with an air of confidentknowledge that completed his conquest of them.

  Ex-Lieut.-Col. Billings strode blithely along, feeling the gladsomeexuberance of a man who had "struck a good thing," and turning over inhis mind as to where he had best market his batch of lively recruits,how he could get around the facts of their previous enlistment, and howmuch he ought to realize per head. He felt that he could afford togive the boys a good breakfast, and that that would be fine policy.Accordingly, he led the way to one of the numerous large eating houses,established by enterprising sutlers, to their own great profit and theshrinkage of the pay of the volunteers. He lined the boys up in front ofthe long shelf which served for a table and ordered the keeper:

  "Now, give each of these boys a good breakfast of ham and eggs andtrimmings and I'll settle for it."

  "Good mornin', Kunnel. When 'd you git down here?" said a voice at hiselbow.

  "Hello, Groundhog, is that you?" said Billings, turning around. "Justthe man I wanted to see. Finish your breakfast and come out here. I wantto talk to you."

  "Well," answered Groundhog, wiping his mouth, "I'm through. The fellerthat runs this shebang ain't made nothin' offen me, I kin tell you. It'sthe first square meal I've had for a week, and I've et until there ain'ta crack left inside o' me that a skeeter could git his bill in. I laidout to git the wuth o' my money, and I done it. What're you doin' downhere in this hole? Ain't Injianny good enough for you?"

  "Injianny's good enough on general principles, but just now there's toomuch Abolition malaria there for me. The Lincoln
satraps 've got theswing on me, and I thought I'd take a change of air. I've come down hereto see if there weren't some chances to make a good turn, and I'vedone very well so far. I've done a little in cattle and got some cottonthrough the lines--enough at least to pay my board and railroad fare.But I think the biggest thing is in recruits, and I've got a schemewhich I may let you into. You know there are a lot of agents down herefrom the New England States trying to git niggers to fill up theirquotas, and they are paying big money for recruits. Can't you go out andgether up a lot o' niggers that we kin sell 'em?"

  "Sure," said Groundhog confidently. "Kin git all you want, if you'll payfor 'em. But what's this gang you've got with you?"

  "O, they're a batch for that blasted Abolition outfit, the 200thInjianny. Them two ornery galoots, Si and Shorty, whose necks I ought'vebroke when I was with the regiment, have brung 'em down. They're notgoin' to git to the 200th Injianny if I kin help it, though. Firstplace, it'll give old McBiddle, that Abolition varmint, enough to githim mustered as Colonel. He helped oust me, and I have it in for him.He was recommended for promotion for gittin' his arm shot off atChickamauga. Wisht it'd bin his cussed head."

  "But what're you goin' to do with the gang?" Groundhog inquired.

  "O, there are two or three men around here that I kin sell 'em to forbig money. I ought to make a clean thousand off 'em if I make a cent."

  "How much'll I git out o' that?" inquired Groundhog anxiously.

  "Well, you ain't entitled to nothin' by rights. I've hived this crowdall by myself, and kin work 'em all right. But if you'll come along andmake any affidavits that we may need, I'll give you a sawbuck. But onthe nigger lay I'll stand in even with you, half and half. You run 'emin and I'll place 'em and we'll whack up."

  "'Tain't enough," answered Groundhog angrily. "Look here, Jeff Billings,I know you of old. You've played off on me before, and I won't stand nomore of it. Jest bekase you've bin a Lieutenant-Colonel and me only ateamster you've played the high and mighty with me. I'm jest as good asyou are any day. I wouldn't give a howl in the infernal regions for yourpromises. You come down now with $100 in greenbacks and I'll go alongand help you all I kin. If you don't--"

  "If I don't what'll you do, you lowlived whelp?" said Billings, in hisusual brow-beating manner. "I only let you into this as a favor, becauseI've knowed you before. You hain't brains enough to make a picayuneyourself, and hain't no gratitude when someone else makes it for you.Git out o' here; I'm ashamed to be seen speakin' to a mangy hound likeyou. Git out o' here before I kick you out. Don't you dare speak to oneo' them boys, or ever to me agin. If you do I'll mash you. Git out."

  Si and Shorty's dismay when they returned and found their squad entirelydisappeared was overwhelming. They stood and gazed at one another for aminute in speechless alarm and wonderment.

  "Great goodness," gasped Si at length, "they can't have gone far. Theymust be somewhere around."

  "Don't know about that," said Shorty despairingly. "We've bin gone somelittle time and they're quick-footed little rascals."

  "What fools we wuz to both go off and leave 'em," murmured Si in deepcontrition. "What fools we wuz."

  "No use o' cryin' over spilt milk," answered Shorty. "The thing todo now is to find 'em, which is very much like huntin' a needle in ahaystack. You stay here, on the chance o' them comin' back, and I'lltake a circle around there to the left and look for 'em. If I don't find'em I'll come back and we'll go down to the Provo-Marshal's."

  "Goodness, I'd rather be shot than go back to the rijimint without 'em,"groaned Si. "How kin I ever face the Colonel and the rest o' the boys?"

  Leaving Si gazing anxiously in every direction for some clew to hismissing youngsters, Shorty rushed off in the direction of the sutler'sshanties, where instinct told him he was most likely to find therunaways.

  He ran up against Groundhog.

  "Where are you goin' in sich a devil of a hurry?" the teamster asked."Smell a distillery somewhere?"

  "Hello, Groundhog, is that you? Ain't you dead yit? Say, have you seena squad o' recruits around here--all boys, with new uniforms, and noletters or numbers on their caps?"

  "Lots and gobs of 'em. Camp's full of 'em. More comin' in by everytrain."

  "But these wuz all Injianny boys, most of 'em little. Not an old manamong 'em."

  "Shorty, I know where your boys are. What'll you give me to tell you?"

  Shorty knew his man of old, and just the basis on which to opennegotiations.

  "Groundhog, I've just had my canteen filled with first-classwhisky--none o' your commissary rotgut, but old rye, hand-made,fire-distilled. I got it to take out to the boys o' the rijimint tocelebrate my comin' back. Le' me have just one drink out of it, and I'llgive it to you if you'll tell."

  Groundhog wavered an instant. "I wuz offered $10 on the other side."

  Shorty was desperate. "I'll give you the whisky and $10."

  "Le' me see your money and taste your licker."

  "Here's the money," said Shorty, showing a bill. "I ain't goin' to trustyou with the canteen, but I'll pour out this big spoon full, which'llbe enough for you to taste." Shorty drew a spoon from his haversack andfilled it level full.

  "It's certainly boss licker," said Groundhog, after he had drunk it,and prudently hefted the canteen to see if it was full. "I'll take youroffer. You're to have just one swig out o' it, and no more, and not ahog-swaller neither. I know you. You'd drink that hull canteenful at onegulp, if you had to. You'll let me put my thumb on your throat?"

  "Yes, and I'll give you the canteen now and the money after we find theboys."

  "All right. Go ahead. Drink quick, for you must go on the jump, oryou'll lose your boys."

  Shorty lifted the canteen to his lips and Groundhog clasped his throatwith his thumb on Adam's apple. When Shorty got his breath he sputtered:

  "Great Jehosephat, you didn't let me git more'n a spoonful. But whereare the boys?"

  "Old Jeff Billings's got 'em down at Zeke Wiggins's hash-foundry feedin''em, so's he kin toll 'em off into another rijimint."

  "Old Billings agin," shouted Shorty in a rage. "Where's the place? Showit to me. But wait a minute till I run back and git my pardner."

  "Gi' me that licker fust," shouted Groundhog, but Shorty was alreadyrunning back for Si. When he returned with him he threw the canteen toGroundhog with the order, "Go ahead and show us the place."

  By the time they came in sight of the sutler's shanty the boys hadfinished their breakfast and were moving off after Billings.

  "There's your man and there's your boys," said Groundhog, pointing tothem. "Now gi' me that 'ere sawbuck. You'll have to excuse me havin'anything to do with old Billings. He's licked me twice already."

  Shorty shoved the bill into his hand, and rushed down in front ofBillings.

  "Here, you black-whiskered old roustabout, where 're you takin' themboys?" he demanded.

  "Git out o' my way, you red-headed snipe," answered Billings, making amotion as if to brush him away.

  "If you don't go off and leave them boys alone I'll belt you over thehead with my gun," said Si, raising his musket.

  "You drunken maverick," answered Billings, trying to brave it out. "I'llhave you shot for insultin' and threatenin' your sooperior officer.Skip out o' here before the Provo comes up and ketches you. Let me go onabout my business. Forward, boys."

  "Officer nothin'. You can't play that on us," said Si. "Halt, there,boys, and stand fast."

  A crowd of teamsters, sutlers' men and other camp followers gatheredaround. A tall, sandybearded man with keen, gray eyes and a rugged,stony face rode up. He wore a shabby slouch hat, his coat was old andweather-stained, but he rode a spirited horse.

  "Here, what's all this row about?" he asked in quick, sharp tones.

  "Keep out o' this mix," said Shorty, without looking around. "'Tain'tnone o' your business. This is our party." With that he made a snatch atBillings's collar to jerk him out of the way.

  "What, you rascal, would you assault an
officer?" said the newcomer,spurring his horse through the crowd to get at Shorty.

  HE AIN'T NO OFFICER 27]

  "He ain't no officer, General," said Si, catching sight of two dim starson the man's shoulders. "He's tryin' to steal our recruits from us."

  "Yes, I am an officer," said Billings, avoiding Shorty's clutch. "Thesemen are assaultin' me while I'm on duty. I want them arrested andpunished."

  "Fall back there, both of you," said the General severely, as Si andShorty came to a present arms. "Sergeant, who are you, and where do youbelong?"

  "I'm Serg't Klegg, sir, of Co. Q, 200th Injianny Volunteer Infantry."

  "Who are you, Corporal?"

  "I'm Corp'l Elliott, sir, of Co. Q, 200th Injianny Volunteer Infantry."

  "Now, officer, who are you?"

  "I'm Lieut.-Col. Billings, sir."

  "Where's your shoulder-straps?"

  "I had 'em taken off this coat to git fixed. They were torn."

  "Where's your sword?"

  "I left it in my quarters."

  "Fine officer, to go on duty that way. Where do you belong?"

  Billings hesitated an instant, but he felt sure that the General did notbelong to the Army of the Cumberland, and he answered:

  "I belong to the 200th Ind."

  "That ain't true, General," Si protested. "He was fired out of theregiment a year ago. He's a citizen."

  "Silence, Sergeant. Billings? Billings? The name of theLieutenant-Colonel of the 200th Ind. happens to be McBiddle--one-armedman, good soldier. Billings? Billings? T. J. Billings? Is that yourname?"

  "Yes, sir," answered Billings, beginning to look very uncomfortable.

  "Didn't you have some trouble about a bunch of cattle you sold to theQuartermaster-General?"

  "Well, there was little difference of opinion, but--"

  "That'll do, sir. That'll do for the present. I begin to get you placed.I thought I knew the name Billings as soon as you spoke it, but Icouldn't remember any officer in my army of that name. Now, Sergeant,tell me your story."

  "General, me and my pardner here," began Si, "have bin home on woundedfurlough. Wounded at Chickamauga and promoted. We got orders to bring onthis squad o' recruits from Jeffersonville for our rijimint. We got inlast night and this mornin' me and my pardner started out to see if wecould find someone to direct us to the rijimint, leavin' the squad alonefor a few minutes. While we wuz gone this feller, who's bin fired out ofour rijimint and another one that he was in, come along and tolled ourboys off, intendin' to sneak 'em into another rijimint and git pay for'em. By great good luck we ketched him in time, just before you come up.You kin ask the boys themselves if I hain't told you the truth."

  "Good idea," said the General, in his quick, peremptory way. "You three(indicating Si, Shorty and Billings) march off there 25 paces, while Italk to the boys."

  Gen. Sherman, for it was the Commander of the Military Division ofthe Mississippi, who, with his usual impetuous, thorough way, wouldinvestigate even the most insignificant affair in his camps, when thehumor seized him, now sprang from his horse, and began a sharp, nervouscross-questioning of the boys as to their names, residence, ages, howthey came there and whither they were bound.

  "You came down with this Sergeant and Corporal, did you? You wererecruited for the 200th Ind., were you? You were put under the charge ofthose men to be taken to your regiment?" he asked Pete Skidmore, at theend of the line.

  "Yes, sir," blubbered Pete. "And they are always losin' us, particularlyme, durn 'em. Spite of all I kin say to 'em they'll lose me, durn theirskins."

  "No, my boy, you sha'n't be lost," said the General kindly, as heremounted. "Stick to our command and you'll come through all right.Billings, you thorough-paced rascal, I want you to get to the other sideof the Ohio River as quickly as the trains will carry you. I haven'ttime to deal with you as you deserve, but if I have occasion to speakto you again you'll rue it as long as you live. There's a train gettingready to go out. If you are wise, you'll take it. Serg't Klegg andCorp'l Elliott, you deserve to lose your stripes for both of you leavingyour squad at the same time. See that you don't do it again. You'll findthe 200th Ind. in camp on the east side of Mission Ridge, about a milesouth of Rossville Gap. Go out this road until you pass old John Ross'shouse about a half a mile. You'll find several roads leading off to theright, but don't take any of them till you come to one that turns offby a sweet gum and a honey-locust standing together on the banks of acreek. Understand? A sweet gum and a honey-locust standing together onthe banks of a creek. Turn off there, go across the mountain and you'llfind your camp. Move promptly now."

  "I declare," said a big Wagonmaster, as the General galloped off, "ifthat old Gump Sherman don't beat the world. He not only knows whereevery regiment in his whole army is located, but I believe he knowsevery man in it. He's a far-reacher, I tell you."

  "Great Jehosephat," gasped Shorty, "was that Gen. Tecumseh Sherman?"

  "As sure 's you're a foot high," replied the Wagonmaster.

  "And I told him to mind his own business," stammered Shorty.

  "Yes, and if it hadn't bin for him you'd 'a' lost us, durn it,"ejaculated little Pete Skidmore.