Bleeding Desire: An MC Romance

by Carter Steele

  Well, OK, maybe for me to be at his place. It would have been slightly weird to have my parents over while Landon and I shared a room, to say nothing of what may have happened in this room.

  But I could still share a moment of some kind with Landon, even if just electronically. I pulled out my phone and texted him, thanking him for what he’d done for my parents. And then I couldn’t help myself.

  “What you did made me like you more, Landon. I know things have been weird and I said I’m moving to AZ, but would love to meet up with you and just talk.”

  Perhaps the oddest part about sending that text was that there was no real nervousness to be felt when I sent it. I certainly wondered how he would react to it, but I just had a certainty and an assuredness to myself that only good things would come from that text.

  It took a bit of time as I listened to my parents “bicker,” but he finally responded.

  “I would love to do that. Can’t right now though. Gotta focus on the club.”

  Not too long ago—very, very recently, in fact—that text might have offended me and made me crazy.

  But now that I knew why Landon was focusing on the club, now that I knew he was going to be the happy Landon even with it, let’s just say things felt a whole lot better than they did before.

  “I understand. And actually, btw, you embracing this makes you so much hotter.”

  He only sent one thing back, but it was the perfect reply.

  The kissing emoji.

  3

  Landon

  From the moment that I dropped Caroline’s parents at her place and bid her farewell, my mind was on the club and the club only.

  Even when the name “Caroline” or her image came to mind, it was in the context of doing my duty for the club. There was a certain adrenaline rush that came from knowing I was going to give my all to the club right now, I was going to lead it into battle, and I was going to determine the outcome of a battle to a great extent.

  No wonder Brock, upon becoming president, had adapted pretty quickly. I had feared the pressure and the commitment to the club that I had failed to recognize the benefits that came with working with it. I didn’t want to use the word “fun” to describe something that would possibly see my men killed and certainly other men killed, but there was a certain intrinsic satisfaction that came from leading my tribe into battle.

  First, though, we had to plan.

  I took the president’s seat without hesitation as Parker, Petey, Zane, and William surrounded me. I didn’t even think about the implications; my mind wouldn’t allow for any space.

  “Good evening,” I said. “For those of you who weren’t aware of what transpired in the last hour, Owen and a rag team of Anarchists came and held Caroline O’Hara’s parents hostage. Caroline is a… romantic interest of mine, and the Anarchists must have figured that out. They’ve made it a point to try and hurt us by hurting our loved ones, but never did I think they would stoop so low.”

  The disgusted looks on everyone’s face told me I had complete buy-in.

  “Of interest, though, was that when we got there, the Anarchists who were holding the parents immediately surrendered. It seems Owen, in his desperation to hurt us, is conscripting men and teenage boys against their will, and as soon as they get the chance to escape, they do. This may help our cause, but it also means that the people who want to be there are going to be more motivated to fight for the club.”

  I liked the levelheaded look everyone had. I knew Parker especially had a tendency to get a little crazy; maybe I was conflating judgment and evaluation for that, but it was much easier to work with than what I had feared.

  “Before, when we go on our runs, if we didn’t find Vulture, we just stopped. It took a coordinated strike on multiple cities with the police for us to hunt him down. However, this time… I am not going to wait at all. If Owen is going to pull this on innocent citizens, it’s only going to get worse. We need to find him and we cannot stop until we do. I don’t care if we have to chase him down to San Diego or up to San Francisco. We stop at nothing. Understood?”

  Everyone nodded. This sounds an awful lot like Brock.

  And our father.

  Guess I really did just have to fall into it. It almost feels natural.

  The thoughts would have made me smile in just about any other circumstance. I suppose that this was putting my plans to travel and explore a little at risk, but why couldn’t I just do both? Instead of traveling throughout the year and being one of those vagabonds without an address, what if I just traveled some of the year and stayed with the club? What if I kept my loyalties and my happiness on the same plane?

  I didn’t see any reason that I couldn’t.

  “We’re going to strike first thing in the morning still,” I said. “Be at the clubhouse at five-thirty.”

  This time, there was no complaining. Even I didn’t like waking up that early, and I was probably the earliest-rising officer in the club. But for the sake of defeating Owen, no time was too early.

  “Anyone have any questions?”

  No one said a word. I noticed Petey smiling and was curious why he was doing so, but such an inquiry didn’t seem appropriate for this meeting.

  “Alright,” I said once it became clear no one else was going to say a word. “Then I will see you all in a few hours.”

  Everyone stood to rise. As was customary, the president hung at the back, waiting for everyone else to leave and in case someone needed a word with me. It turned out that I would get an answer to my question as Petey walked over to me.

  “You remember how I said you ought to find something you should fight for?” he said. “I think you found it. I’m not saying I know what it is, but that was impressive up there.”

  I smiled.

  “It’s just a belief in the value of the club,” I said. “Sucks it took me walking away from it to realize its value, but I suppose if that’s what it took, no point in trying to rewrite the past.”

  “Never would want you do,” Petey said. “There have been moments where every single person in this clubhouse has questioned the value of their membership. Even Brock. Even your father, and he founded the damn thing. No shame in it. If anything, it makes you stronger.”

  “Well, you played a big role in helping me realize that,” I said. “So—”

  “Landon!”

  We both turned back in surprise as Parker all but broke down the door trying to get to us.

  “Ya ain’t get the call?”

  “No, my phone’s outside.”

  “Oh, right. It’s Brock. He’s woken up.”

  The way we sped down the roads, you would have thought that one of the old ladies of the club was in serious danger.

  We flagrantly ignored all speed limits and pretty much took every stop sign as a yellow stop light and every red light as a stop sign. At no point did we stop for more than a half-second to look for oncoming traffic. If Sheriff Jones or one of the nearby officers stopped us, well, they couldn’t stop all of us.

  Fortunately, either the Romara police had enough sense not to stop us or they just didn’t intersect with us, and we all made it to the hospital in record time. We hardly had our bikes turned off before we had dismounted them, and we sprinted like mad to see my brother.

  Who, as it turned out, was just sitting upright in his bed, eating some ice cream and watching The Godfather on television.

  “You know, my doctors said I was crazy for eating ice cream with a headache, but sometimes, you just need some comfort food.”

  “Brock, dude!” I said, unable to control my giddiness as I leaned in to hug him. “So glad you’re alright.”

  “I am too, but… no offense, I thought you’d be off somewhere with Caroline?”

  I chuckled.

  “Well first of all, you’re my brother. You got priority right now. Second, there’s been a lot that has happened since you got knocked out.”

  “Like what?”

  “Well…”
<
br />   I didn’t want to burden him with the stuff about Owen and Caroline’s parents and our impending strike. The man needed to rest more than he needed to get geared up for battle.

  “We broke up briefly, but now we’re trying to figure it out.”

  “Why?”

  “Just… some misunderstandings, I think.”

  I cut myself off from adding more as I heard Parker, Petey, and several other club members walking in. I briefly had the image of the entire club pouring into the hospital at once, all of the staff members wondering just what the hell was going on and if they were in danger. It was amusing, but people got intimidated easily.

  “Parker,” Brock said. “Don’t tell me I’ve been knocked out so long that you got a California accent.”

  “Ain’t ya fuckin’ never say that again!” he said, and we all broke out in laughter—even Parker. “Good to have ya back, ya dummy.”

  “Oh, stop, you all act like I was out for five years. I wasn’t out five years, right?”

  I turned back briefly with a smirk, as if trying to silently communicate to the rest of the club to do just that. Unfortunately, I did a piss poor job of hiding my smile—it was kind of hard not to be giddy about the fact that my brother was back awake, having risen from the metaphorical dead.

  “Five days, I’d believe, but you just sold yourself out for five years.”

  “It was two days,” I said. “It’s Sunday evening.”

  “Damn. Never been out that long. And I don’t even feel that rested.”

  We all laughed at his joke, probably a little harder than we would have under normal circumstances. Not that, given what had just transpired, we felt bad about it.

  “So why did you two break up? And why do you all have a vibe like a war’s about to break up?”

  Again, I looked back to the club, but this time, there was no smile.

  “You know that you looking away tells me something’s going on, right?” Brock said. “You guys know that you can tell me what’s happening. Landon is more than capable of running this club without me. I don’t need to be in charge, but I don’t need to be out of the loop. I’m not going to do anything rash.”

  Wow, Brock. My brother wasn’t exactly shy about handing out compliments, but at times, he would get so busy with work that it would become virtually impossible for him to hand out accolades. It probably didn’t carry as much weight as it would have a month ago, but still—any time the chosen son praises the black sheep son, it was worth feeling good about.

  “Well, might as well,” I said.

  I proceeded to recap everything that had happened, from Parker making me president to the attack on Caroline’s parents to the current plans. Brock, true to character, never seemed overly concerned or fearful of what might happen. He just nodded, hummed in his throat, and stroked his chin as I spoke.

  “Well, I’ve heard enough then,” he said, but he was speaking more to the crowd than to me. “This man has a plan better than what I would have come up with before and certainly better than anything I could come up with now.”

  A few quiet murmurs of “nice” and “there you go” came, further boosting my confidence.

  “So do what he says. Go find the asshole that hurt me, fuck them up, and bring peace to the town!”

  We roared, pumping our fists and clapping each other on the back. I was ready. I was fucking inspired by my brother waking up, to say nothing of his actual words.

  And then, it got even better.

  I got an idea to help all parties on my side.

  4

  Caroline

  I had gone back out to the living room area, sharing a glass of wine with my parents. I had made sure to keep myself sober, but my parents held no such reservation, seemingly drinking to their heart’s content. They gulped multiple glasses down, asked for more, and couldn’t stop laughing.

  It was awesome. My parents deserved a night of feeling loose and free after earlier in the day. I couldn’t remember the last time they’d gotten drunk, but this one would certainly stand out for a while. It wasn’t like our conversations went particularly deep, but the two of them laughed and giggled at each other so much I would have thought that they were more high than they were drunk.

  Late in the evening, just when I had planned to go to bed and to request my parents do the same, my phone rang. It was Landon.

  “Hey, what’s going on?” I said unassumingly.

  “Where are you right now?”

  Boy, the tone of that question was a lot calmer than some of our previous phone calls.

  “With Mom and Dad, in my apartment still. We haven’t gone anywhere. Why?”

  Don’t ask “Did something happen?” Don’t be the worry-wart between you two.

  “I want you three to come to the hospital. Bring your parents. Brock’s woken up and he’s well-guarded. The safest spot for you three is going to be here.”

  Had we not had the big argument the previous couple of visits about me going to the clubhouse, I might have come back at Landon and asked why home suddenly wasn’t safe. But I certainly felt some fatigue, and if I did, I knew Landon did. That, and he presumably still had his club business to attend to.

  “OK, we’ll head over in a bit then.”

  “Good. Try and make it quick. I don’t imagine you’re an imminent danger, but I don’t want us to take any risks.”

  You don’t have to tell me that twice after what happened. I agreed, hung up, and without much trouble, roused my parents out of their buzzed state and to the car.

  They certainly did their part to keep things light, continuing to crack somewhat surprisingly dark jokes about who would have died from a heart attack first if someone had come to rob them again. I was a little horrified sitting in the front seat. What would happen if it actually came to pass?

  Given how buzzed they were, they’d probably laugh at first before realizing it was actually serious.

  I shrugged. As long as we were safe, maybe making dark jokes was exactly what they needed in order to get over everything that had happened.

  As soon as we pulled up, Landon was waiting outside for us, his hands in his pocket.

  “Oh, Don, look! It’s the nice man that took us home.”

  “He has a name, you fool, it’s Larry.”

  Oh, God help me, they’re that drunk.

  “It’s Landon, remember? He helped drive you to me.”

  “Oh, right! Yes, that was a very scary ride.”

  I just mouthed “I’m sorry” to Landon as we approached. He snorted in amusement as he hugged me and then, much to my awkward surprise, was enveloped by my mother and father simultaneously. I might have to cut them off just a bit.

  “Thanks for coming,” he said. “We’ve got a bunch of us in here. I just think you’ll be safer here than you will be at home.”

  “Oh, sweetie, our home’s reduced to ash, I would hope we are safer here!”

  Landon and I both laughed as we led them inside, running a little bit ahead.

  “How’s Brock?”

  “He’s fine,” Landon said. You seem so much more at ease now. It’s so cute. “He’s got a little bit of a headache, but he had some ice cream. Tried to tell him the ice cream was only going to make him worse, but it’s like trying to explain logic to a little kid, you know. It’s not going to do any good.”

  “Oh, he’ll be fine,” I said with a wave of my hand.

  “Oh, trust, I know. Next thing you know, though, he’s going to be ordering pizza. Then I’m going to have to explain why a hospital patient is eating pizza, and—”

  I turned around and scowled when I saw my parents. I so badly wanted to kiss Landon to shut him up.

  But I wasn’t quite at that point where I could do such a thing in front of Mom and Dad.

  “—then he’s going to have to talk to the doctors, but that’s all to say that he’s in good shape. I told him I’m handling club business until at least tomorrow afternoon, and he’s not allowed to know of anyth
ing until he leaves the hospital.”

  “You’re such a mom,” I teased him.

  He protested in such a cute way, I couldn’t help but embrace him in a tight squeeze. It wasn’t a kiss, but I think Landon got the message all the same.

  “But seriously, it’s really nice to see you take care of your brother like this.”

  “I mean, is that a surprise to you?”

  “No, but it is a surprise to see you in such good spirits.”

  Landon almost look offended.

  “I just mean that before, through middle and high school, you were so melancholy after your father died. I knew it made sense for a short term, but it seemed permanent. Even here, when you got dragged back in…”

  “You know, I’ve thought of it some since I saw you a few hours ago,” he said. “At the time, I just said I needed to embrace being a member of the club. But I think it’s deeper than that. I think I needed to embrace following in my father’s path.”

  “What do you mean?”

  Landon gulped, his hand going around my back. I fell into the touch.

  “It’s one thing to do what your brother wants you to do. You’re brothers. For better and for worse, you’re around each other for most of each other’s life. But my father… I can’t say that I resented him. But it’s just, we all want to do better than our parents. And I think I wanted to do so by rising above the club and going someplace that he had not—someplace outside Romara and the MC world. But I never stopped to think that maybe he was just content there.”

  This was so different than the Landon that had sulked on the car ride home. It was practically a completely different man.

  I was very seriously reconsidering the fact that I didn’t want to kiss him in front of my parents.

  “Anyways, in the silent moments here in the hospital, I’ve thought of my father a lot. I’ve thought about how I kept trying to be different than him, to be better than him, but I also wondered why I was so insistent on comparing myself to him, you know? Like why did my life have to be defined in relation to his standards? And in doing so, it’s kind of funny that I’ve found myself happy with the club. But, here I am.”