I feel immediately defensive but it’s not my place to interfere. So as the man who looks so much like my secret lover steps into the house with my permission, I stand to the side and flip him off so he can’t see.
I already called for Shonda and Travis who are both coming my way right now.
“William,” Shonda says while frowning with confusion. “We weren’t expecting you.”
Travis stands by his mother’s side as a dark-eyed William assesses our little family unit.
“I came to bring my son his birthday gift,” William explains, holding up the envelope.
“That was almost two months ago,” I snap, feeling even more defensive than before.
He doesn’t seem fazed by my tone or lack of respect.
“It would have been sooner had he answered the phone when I called.” He doesn’t look at me at all while speaking. What a callous prick.
Travis is completely tense but he moves to hug his dad anyway and accepts the envelope when they part.
Shonda nods for me to go to the kitchen so I do as I’m told, but I hide behind the doorway to listen to their exchange. I don’t catch much.
“Want to go for a walk with me?” William asks Travis after some mumbling from Shonda.
“Whatever,” Travis replies quietly and seconds later the door closes.
Shonda joins me in the kitchen looking tense.
“My dad is way better looking,” I point out and she laughs weakly, the stress lines around her eyes smooth but some remain. “Everything okay?”
She cups my cheek as she passes to get her coffee fix, and then as she rinses a cup she replies, “William is moving with his new family. He’s come to say goodbye.”
My heart breaks for Travis. He really loves his dad even though they hardly see each other. He has fond memories of him as a child before he started cheating on Shonda. We’ve spoken about him a few times, though not overly so. Travis is a momma’s boy through and through.
“He’s having another baby and Cassidy wants to be closer to her parents near San Diego.” She pours herself and me some coffee, and then reaches for a bottle of whiskey that sits on top of the refrigerator. After dropping a dash into her cup, giving me a wry smile and dropping a dash into mine, she continues, “That’s where they met, during a business trip, and he moved her out here while we were still happily married. She lived in a condo about ten minutes away. A kept woman. Meanwhile I could barely get him to pay for Travis’ school fees.”
I scowl and sip my coffee. I do not like whiskey. Not at all. But I keep on drinking it. “He’s such a scumbag.”
“Agreed. Make sure you pick yourself a good one, one day. Pay attention to those red flags. It’s too easy to be forgiving when you love somebody, but you’re so much smarter than that.”
I give her a reassuring look. “When that day comes you can be sure I will be very choosy with my life partner.” Then after a pause I ask, “Do you miss him? Do you still get jealous?”
“Not in the slightest. It’s easy to see how bad somebody was for you when you find somebody who is so good for you in so many ways. I’m not sad for myself anymore, but I am for Travis. He loved his dad, and as soon as William left, he stopped coming around. We saw him once every few months if that. It destroyed him for a time.”
“I’m so sorry, Shonda.”
She shrugs. “Your father is an amazing man and I know he’s filled that void in Travis to some extent, as have you… but he’s going to need us right now. Even though he hardly sees his dad, I have a feeling this is probably a final goodbye. William doesn’t bother when he’s around the corner, he’s definitely not going to bother when he’s eight hours away.”
Fuck. This is hitting too close to home.
“Why didn’t you tell him?” I’m not judging, I’m just hoping she can give me some wisdom on my own situation without me having to directly ask.
She shakes her head, she looks so forlorn. I can’t help but let it affect me. “I didn’t find out until a few days ago. I wanted to but your dad said it’s up to William to take the brunt of it.”
“Makes sense, you don’t want to be linked to the moment Travis finds out his dad is leaving him for good. Don’t blame yourself. You’re such a good mom and wife. William is a massive tool.” I hug her and it’s the first time I’ve ever instigated it. She returns it, holding me tight like she would Travis. She always smells like peaches and vanilla.
“He’ll be okay,” I whisper, and she holds me even tighter, making it hard for me to breathe. “He’ll be too busy for us all soon anyway with Stanford. Too busy to even think about his deadbeat dad.”
We separate and she cups my face again. “I hope you’re right.” Then, as we sip our coffee in silence, she asks, “And what about you and your school? Have you thought about it? There are other colleges in the area.”
I open my mouth ready to answer when the front door opens and slams shut and footsteps can be heard racing up the stairs.
“Oh dear,” Shonda mutters and her eyes shine with unshed tears.
“Let him process,” I say quietly when she goes toward the doorway. I know she wants to comfort him but I know Travis and I know he wouldn’t appreciate that right now. He’ll be mad she didn’t pre-warn him. “He won’t appreciate your company right now.”
“You’re probably right. When did you get so wise?”
“I decided I want to be a shrink, so I’ve been watching endless videos on YouTube and reading up on shit. Maybe I absorbed more than I thought.”
“You want to be a psychiatrist? You’ve finally decided?”
I hesitate, then nod my confirmation. My chestnut hair falls from behind my ear so I tuck it back there with nervous fingers. “We’ll talk about it with Dad soon. Not yet. Let Travis have his moment.”
“That’s such a good profession to go for. I’m so proud of you for finding something that interests you.”
“Don’t be proud of me until I graduate.”
She smiles kindly and we both finish our coffees in silence.
I climb into bed with him after Shonda and my dad speak to him an hour or so later, and there I stay, holding him from behind until the sun rises. My body curled around his, my lips pressed against the back of his neck. I’m not sure I slept at all, I’m not sure he did either, but when the sky glows orange and the birds start chirping, he turns to face me and we make love until we physically can’t anymore.
“You don’t need him, Trav, he’s a waste of space,” I whisper in his ear as my fingers tickle up and down his spine.
He holds me. Just holds me. His sweet scent comforts me and I wonder if mine does the same for him.
“I wish I could take away your pain.”
He kisses my hair and a few minutes later I climb from his bed. We head to school together in silence. His hand grips mine over the console and eventually he smiles at me too. A smile with so much warmth and gratitude.
“He’s not worth it,” he mutters, pulling over to kiss me. I accept it willingly and eagerly, desperately seeking his tongue with my own. “He’s not worth wasting a single second with you being sad.”
Boom. My heart just grew so big it hit my rib cage.
“Don’t say things like that,” I murmur against his mouth and deepen the kiss.
He smiles and we go to school. All is well for the rest of the day.
All is well for the rest of the week.
All is well until the moment I get my college application replies through the mail during the last week of April, three days before Dad’s wedding, two weeks before prom that Shonda has been helping me pick a dress for. Prom that I’m attending stag with my girls. Shonda and I are just getting closer and closer which is making it so much harder to leave.
“I got in,” I tell my girls over the phone. I look at the closer backup colleges I applied to but didn’t get any financial help with. It’s fate. This is fate’s twisted way of saying this is the right decision. “I actually got in.”
They all scream so loudly I have to take my phone off speaker. They all got in too, but we already knew that. I was the last one to receive my reply. Another cruel twist of fate.
“You’ve really got to tell the parentals and Travis,” Cella implores.
“I will, the day after the wedding, I don’t want to fuck this up for them.”
“That’s fair. Should we come around to celebrate?”
“Not yet. I’ve got Shonda’s bachelorette party to focus on.”
“I wish I could go,” Cella whines. “It sounds ballin’.”
It really does. But Shonda made it clear it’s a small event for just her closest friends and me of course.
“We will have our own celebratory party after she’s told everyone,” Molly says around a yawn. “I’m too tired for vodka today anyway.”
“Yeah, me too. I stayed up all night with Preston painting his creepy little figurines,” Bris admits and my eyes widen. “You know he’s got a hot tub at his place? Makes me wonder why we’re always at yours, Raven.”
“Too right, what’s up with that?” Molly asks and Cella hums her agreement.
I love that none of them are weirded out by the figurine part of that conversation. They’re also not weirded out that she’s been spending time with Preston alone. A year ago, we’d have ripped her for it so I like to think we’re growing up to become nicer people.
“Well then you better figure out a way to convince Preston to let us party at his house sometime,” I insist as I put my letters in a neat pile.
My bedroom door opens after a brief knock so I scramble to shove my applications under my bed. My heart is hammering. If they find out now it’ll ruin Dad’s wedding, or seriously upset him for it.
I smile at Travis while saying to the girls, “My number one bae is here.”
“I thought I was your number one bae?” Cella cries dramatically making the others groan.
Travis kicks the door closed behind him. “Hey, guys.”
“Hi, Travis,” they cry in unison.
“Why didn’t Preston ever tell us he has a killer hot tub?” Molly snaps.
“He wanted to but he thought it would be weird just announcing his hot tub in the middle of a conversation. We thought it sounded suggestive.”
“Fair point,” I mutter and they agree. He scoops me up, his mood intense. We kiss and fall back onto my bed.
“Are you guys making out? I can hear kissing noises,” Bris asks, her tone squeaky.
“Mm-hmm,” I reply, my mouth locked to Travis’.
He starts to unbutton my denim skirt and yanks it over my hips. I love it when he gets like this.
“The parentals?” I murmur, my tone questioning their whereabouts.
“They’ve gone out to celebrate their final night together as an unmarried couple.”
“Kay,” I breathe when he drags my panties off next and immediately closes his mouth over my clit. “OH FUCK!”
“That sounds so hot,” Cella says and Molly agrees as I reach blindly for my phone and disconnect the call.
My hand goes to his hair and I grip it tight as he works me with his mouth and fingers.
I remember the first time he did this, he was so nervous and clumsy, but he didn’t quit until I came. Which took a while. Now he’s a master at it. He takes great pride in bringing me to orgasm with his mouth and loves it when I praise him for it.
It takes him hardly any time at all anymore to get me there.
“Travis,” I breathe, trying not to squeeze his head too tightly with my thighs.
His tongue flicks back and forth, his fingers push and pull.
Seconds later I’m crying out into the night and my hands are gripping the bedsheet, so I don’t rip out his hair.
While I’m still reeling, he stands, yanks down his pants, and poises himself at my pulsing entrance. I shudder in preparation.
He sinks inside and buries his face in my neck. We waste no time. This isn’t flowery sex, it’s powerful and rough. I roll him over and dig my nails into his chest as I ride him hard and fast, hovering my hips above him because sitting on him fully is too deep and uncomfortable.
The only downside to him being so well hung. I just can’t take every inch of him in certain positions.
His fingers dig into the flesh of my waist as he helps guide me at a speed that brings him the most pleasure. When he’s close to climax his hips piston upwards and his head falls back.
I spiral as he’s coming down from his. There’s just something about the feel of him pulsing inside of me as his body twitches that really sets me off. It’s the trigger for most of my penetrative orgasms these days.
I flop onto his chest breathing heavy.
“I totally voice recorded every second of that, just so y’all know,” Molly’s muffled voice carries over the sound of our breathing.
We both tense and all of the girls start cackling through the phone.
“I swear I ended the call,” I hiss and reach for it. “You fuckers. Why didn’t you drop the line?”
“Why didn’t you? SLUUUUUT!” Bris singsongs and the others cackle again.
“I hate you all,” I mutter and disconnect.
Travis grins beneath me, his arms folded behind his head.
I trail my fingers across his stubbled jaw. “You’re getting a beard.”
“I wanted to wait to shave so I’d be baby smooth for the wedding.”
I kiss his lips. “You should grow it out again after, it feels so good down there, not even kidding.”
“Maybe I won’t shave it at all.”
I wag my eyebrows at him suggestively and he rolls onto me, biting my neck and making me laugh.
“Gonna miss you tomorrow,” he whispers when we calm down though my body is still tense in preparation for his biting and tickling.
“Gonna miss you too.”
We clean up, get in our pajamas, and head to his room to watch movies until the parentals get home.
After Shonda’s bachelorette party I honestly didn’t believe she’d make it to her own wedding.
It was so wild. There were strippers but, in my opinion, they were a bit greasy. One of them took a liking to me which was flattering but I imagine he gets laid at every event he goes to. I’m not about to touch his schlong with a ten-foot barge pole.
Also, I’m with Travis. Duh.
Luckily I feel fine because I don’t get hangovers yet, something my dad says will change in a couple of years when I’ve abused my liver some more and I get too old to recharge my body batteries as fast as I do now.
Poor Shonda, however, suffered all day yesterday. The day of rest before her wedding. The day my dad and Travis both vanished to give us peace.
She looked as rough as she felt, let me tell you. I had to look after her all day. Not that I minded.
Today is the wedding and she’s looking a lot better despite the fact she is trembling like a leaf. Obviously an acceptable reaction to getting married. It’s not a small thing, especially for somebody who has done it before.
I put my ass into gear organizing her favorite women on earth to ensure they’re where they need to be, calling the stylists to give them directions, making her breakfast, ensuring the photographer takes a lot of photos of us all getting ready.
By the time we’re done and in the car, nearly everyone is crying. Myself included. There’s just something so sweet about all of this.
My dad is so happy. Shonda makes him happy and because of this I can leave the state knowing he’s being looked after. This eases my mind when it comes to thinking about the decisions I’ve made regarding my future.
Shonda holds my hand with white, satin-clad fingers and squeezes tight.
“You okay?” I ask and she nods with a happy but nervous smile on her face. “Your dad is waiting for you, Travis is in place, everything is as planned.”
“Your dad?”
“Got to the hotel an hour ago,” I grin.
She’s in a gorgeous, simple sat
in and lace dress with such a long and beautiful train. Her face is shrouded in a sparkling veil. She loves glitter far too much, but to be honest, she looks absolutely beautiful.
My black, satin, knee-length dress cuts across my chest and shoulders, leaving them bare. I’m wearing sparkling black heels and in my hand is a rose-gold and black faux-flower bouquet. It’s gorgeous. I feel so beautiful and glamorous.
“It’s time,” I tell her, pushing open the door as my hand tweaks the rose-gold chain around my neck. The sparkling pink gem rests above the edge of my dress.
They’re getting married in a hotel along the beach. The weather is perfect for an outdoor wedding, but Shonda didn’t want to risk it. I almost wish she had, although these heels will not do well on the sand and I’m not wearing sunblock.
“Thank you for including me in your wedding, Shonda,” I say as we’re directed to the correct location.
“Thank you for being involved and accepting me,” she replies, looking so beautiful and happy. “I really wish we had more time together.”
“We have loads of time together.” I’m guided ahead and around an open doorway. The sound of a soft guitar playing “From This Moment On” has me tensing. It’s almost my time to shine. I’m about to see Travis. In rehearsal a week ago, he met me on the other side of this door and walked me down the aisle. This time is no different except now there’s a million eyes on me.
I put on a brave face and as soon as I’m nodded at by the wedding planner I move on unsteady legs.
Travis smiles at me, a genuine smile, as I take his hand. He grips mine tight and wraps it under his arm. “You look beautiful,” he whispers and I almost cry again.
“Thank you,” I whisper reply. “You look pretty good yourself.”
He smiles down at me, his eyes meeting my own with such an intense happiness I forget where we are for a while.
He looks so irresistibly handsome in an all-black suit and shirt with a rose-gold tie. This theme Shonda chose is a vision. So classy and perfect. His hair is neatly tamed to one side and his glasses are gone.
We make our way down the aisle carefully until we reach the end where my dad stands beaming from ear to ear. His suit matches Travis’.
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