Ice Hard

by Tracy Goodwin

  Still, regardless of how optimistic I am when I’m with Nick, I’m a realist. While I’ll give my all to Nick and our relationship, I’ll also be prepared for the worst. With the rise inevitably comes the fall, and I’m reminded you have to be careful what you wish for.

  Nick tickles me some more, and I writhe beneath his weight, my laughter filling the room.

  He seizes my lips and the heat rises, as it always does, when he’s close. It’s complicated has taken on a whole new meaning. Especially now, when we’re playing for keeps.

  * * *

  —

  “I like it when I leave you speechless.” I crawl atop Nick, his rock-hard body sated beneath mine. Planting kisses on his torso, I work my way up, reveling in how his muscles twitch beneath my lips, and teeth, and tongue.

  “And I like everything you do to make me speechless.” He moans as I nip his smooth chest. “Especially that. More of that.”

  He makes me giddy. I’ve never done drugs, never will. Nick is a natural high for me and I can’t get enough. We’ve barely slept and I’m not ready to. Peering at the french doors, I note that the horizon is painted with brushstrokes of rose and orange.

  “Let’s watch the sunrise.” Pressing my lips against Nick’s, I add in a sensual whisper, “Please. I’m already prepared for my walk of shame, we might as well enjoy the ocean sunrise first.”

  “No walk of shame. I asked one of Marcus’s staff to bring your bags down here. They’re in the closet—”

  “You saved me from the dreaded walk of shame?” This man is perfection. I straddle him, splaying my hands on his smooth chest. “When?”

  Nick gives me a smirk, like I should know the answer. “After the desk. You made it clear that we were…well, you know.”

  Yeah, I do know. On par for the best night of my life. A night I don’t want to end, even though we’ve decided to keep seeing each other. “Then how about a sunrise?”

  Pressing his lips against my palm, Nick licks, then kisses me. There…where he seems to have a soft spot…on my palm, then below my wrist. I sigh each time he does it. The reaction is involuntary but conveys just how much his intimate kiss means. As does the fact that he knows I like it and seems to prolong it because I like it.

  “One condition.” He caresses my palm and I’m already prepared to agree to just about anything he would ask of me. “Come see my real view. I get on the bus tomorrow to fly out, and you interview when?”

  “The day after.” He remembered my upcoming interview. That one simple gesture makes me grin.

  “How about we continue what we started, say today?” His cerulean gaze holds mine. It conveys so much of Nick’s personal feelings, it mirrors his soul if one searches enough, and I do. I always do. Last night, there was passion, and hunger, then a gentleness the depths of which I can’t describe, even if I tried. Now, his eyes are tumultuous, as if he is worried that I’ll turn him down.

  Nick promised me a night of hot sex with no commitment, only he’s all in and now he’s worried that I’ve changed my mind. Even after my admissions last night, after we decided to take us past one night. He’s still concerned. I can see it; I can see him clearly. It’s his eyes. And the intricate lines that etch deeply in his forehead. I smooth them with my free fingers. “I’m all in. There’s no need to worry. Not today, at least.” My last words are exaggerated and met with one of my best sassy smiles.

  “How is it that you see through me? No one else can. That’s what makes me the best at my job.” He brushes my hair from my eyes. Another intimate gesture that makes my body hum, my senses prickle.

  “I don’t know…I just do.” Deep, Cami. Really. When he’s staring at me with that sexy gaze, emanating a sincerity like no other, I don’t know…I just do is the best reply I can come up with.

  His mouth seizes mine, his lips soft, yet rough. Like a whisper, like a request—or a demand. It makes me want to stay in bed with him and never leave.

  “Beach sunrise. Then we head to my place. I promise you’ll like the view.” He rolls me onto my back and rises from the bed, heading to the closet while I study his tight ass and rippling muscles by the dim light. Even in shadow, Adonis has nothing on Nick. No, Nick is buff, he’s ripped. And the thought that I spent all night worshiping his body causes pure adrenaline to spike through my system.

  After pulling my suitcase from the closet and placing it on the bed, Nick halts in the process of stepping into his sweatpants. “Get dressed or we’ll miss the sunrise.”

  “I like this view.”

  He laughs. “There’s more where this came from. Now let’s go. I promised you an ocean sunrise.”

  “Ah. The ocean.” My eyes skim his muscles and shaft one more time as I bite my lower lip in an overexaggerated way. “I still like this view.” My flirting is on full display.

  “Don’t.” He shakes his head, his baritone husky. “That naughty pout has me all turned on and I want to fuck you. Keep teasing me and I won’t offer the beach again.”

  Little does Nick know, I’ve got a plan. As he shrugs into a sweatshirt and grabs some blankets, I find my oversized sweater and my coat. It’s long, and loose. By the time I get my duck boots on, the sky has turned dusky shades of pastel color. Though it’s cold, the temperature seems to have risen since last night. Or it could be Nick, the fact that he’s wrapped his arms around me and is emanating enough heat for the both of us.

  We travel away from the main house, from his cottage if you want to call it that, to a secluded section of beach, hidden behind a dune. There are no heavy gusts, just a light breeze. Nick pulls out a wool hat from his jacket pocket and tugs it onto my head, over my messy post-sex hair. It’s got the Nighthawks logo on it. “Warm enough?”

  Nuzzling closer to him, I nod. He keeps me warm, and he keeps my insecurities at bay. For now it’s enough, though I wonder what will happen when he goes on the road. Will those old fears come rushing back to me? Nick isn’t the type to cheat, but I thought the same of Pete and temptation is temptation. There’s no rhyme or reason to it, nor is there an armor I can wear to protect myself. Not anymore. I removed my armor for Nick, knowing full well that I must trust that Nick is the man that I think he is, trust that I’ll be enough for him, trust that he meant what he said…that I’m enough, that he won’t cheat, that not having kids naturally is okay, if we last that long.

  I want us to last that long.

  Good God, I admitted it to myself. The realization makes me quiver. For the first time since Pete, I want a relationship to last. Perhaps for the first time ever, because I was never this into Pete. Not even close.

  Nick and I sit on the blankets he placed on the sand. We’re joined by those beach sounds that people take for granted on sunny days during beach vacations: the squawking of soaring seagulls and the roar of the waves crashing against the shore. In the summer, this is background noise. It’s commandeered by kids laughing, music playing, dogs barking. This melody of waves and nature is rare, and I cherish it. Especially when Nick tugs me against his chest, and I can hear his heart beating through the fabric of his sweatshirt.

  With his jacket unzipped, he takes it off and wraps part of it around me. He’s giving. All about taking care of me. I don’t need him to, of course. I’m an adult. But still, it’s nice, and I find that deep within my soul, I want him to. My heart is opening to him in ways I never thought possible. This isn’t love, but it’s no longer just lust. On second thought, I don’t think it was ever just lust. I refused to consider that possibility. Until now.

  He flattens his palm on my leg, beneath my coat. “What are you wearing—shorts? You must be freezing.”

  “Nope.” I climb atop him, straddling him. Making sure my long coat covers us as his hands explore my calves, my thighs, then my ass. My bare ass. No underwear.

  “Oh God, Cami. You’re killing me.”

  I know.
I can feel his erection through the cotton of his sweatpants as I lick his full lips, probing for entrance. He moans, his hands exploring my lower back, then reaching higher, beneath my heavy cable-knit sweater. Cupping my breasts with his palms, he teases my nipples. His thumbs tweak, then encircle them until they’re taut and painful. Like his erection, I assume. “You’re too good to be true.”

  His breathing is labored as my tongue brushes against his, lingering, my kisses prolonged and deliberate. No one’s on the beach, I scoped it out. Besides, no one can see under my coat, or the blankets Nick has placed over my shoulders and around my waist. To any stray jogger, we’re making out. Besides, I’m not embarrassed. Far from it. For the first time in my life, I’m uninhibited. I’m free. And I’m taking what I want.

  I thread my fingers through Nick’s hair. “Fuck me, Nick. Or I’ll fuck you. It’s your choice.” My nails scratch his scalp as I grab his hair tighter with my fist. “I’ve got the only view I want…you.”

  His eyes jerk open and meet mine. I’ve been staring at him, studying his face, especially the web of lines that form around his eyes when he’s struggling with something. Right now, he’s fighting how much he wants me against his need to protect me.

  “I don’t need your protection. I want you. Now.” With my last statement, he knows how much I want him. “This isn’t teasing. It’s real. I’m real.”

  Kneading my breasts, he moans. “Yeah, baby. I know you are.”

  Throughout our night together, there’s been a reverence, a respect from Nick. No matter how hot, how primal, how dirty sex with him has been, he’s still been a gentleman. Right now, I want the Dominator.

  “If you want to date me, you’ve got to fuck me. Hard and rough. Like I’m forbidden.” His dark brows furrow. “I know what happens on the road, remember? The temptation. How relentless the puck bunnies are. That’s why, if you want something more with me, I’m going to be your girlfriend, your lover, and your mistress. There won’t be anyone else. Just me. I’m—”

  “Everything and everyone.” His grip tightens on my breasts. “My only one.”

  He understands now. “Are you up for that?”

  “Hell, yeah, I’m up for it.” His erection is hard, and he’s more than ready. “Fuck me, Camille. Show me what you’ve got.”

  Reaching under his sweatpants, I free his erection with my hand, gripping his shaft and squeezing hard. He moans audibly, grabbing a fistful of my messy waves and tugging my head backward. “That’s it, baby.”

  I’m tight and wet in anticipation of him. Pumping his cock, it is hard and ready for me, and I slide myself on top of it. My body reacts with waves of heat and shudders as I ride him. Undulating, my core tightens even more around his cock with my rhythmic rocking, his erection growing with each thrust and motion.

  Seizing control, I plant my lips against his with an urgency that Nick can’t refuse. I stroke his tongue with mine, probing deeper into his mouth, as his cock swells within me. There’s the usual friction between us, the undercurrent of passion and of reverence. This time, it will be different. I want to be everything for him, because that’s what I deserve. So, just when Nick cries out, I adjust a fraction, prolonging his orgasm, causing his erection to harden, allowing him deeper within me, then deeper still.

  A wind gust lashes against my face, but it feels good. Nick’s heat is keeping me warm, and the more I deny him a climax, only for him to reach new heights, the more he moans, and pleads with me. “Please, Camille.”

  That’s when I ride him faster, harder, until Nick cries out at the same time I do. Our climaxes taking over, long and hard. As he continues to come, as I meld myself against him, as he fills me.

  “You are my only.” His words are rough, as he cups my chin in his palms. “My only.”

  Nick says it with such conviction, such raw unfiltered emotion, that I nod. “I know.” I believe him. He won’t betray me. I know it. He does, too. That’s why his kisses, once demanding, have become languorous and possessive. Because this is what we’ve become: a promise. A promise that he will be faithful to me. Because I’m enough for him.

  “You are one hell of a woman.” He winks at me. It sends a flutter through me to my core.

  This man is so much more than I first gave him credit for. We’re not in love, but my blood pulsates in my temples. Rushing like a runaway train. I’m either on a course for destruction, or on a roller coaster safely, solidly slowing to a stop. No matter how this turns out, my heart is on the line. Then again, so is Nick’s. If I get a job offer…

  “Look.” He nods at the horizon, and I turn. The sunrise over the ocean is breathtaking, lighting up the sky in brilliant streaks of pastels. A new dawn. Infinite possibilities. The same can be said for me and Nick, for our relationship.

  Curling up against his side, I watch the sunrise with him. “It’s beautiful.” The sunrise, the ocean, this moment. It’s all so precious.

  While there are infinite possibilities, there are also more ways than I can count for me to screw this up. I can’t allow my head to sabotage my heart. Easier said than done. But I must do it. For me and Nick to stand a chance, I’ve got to keep my cool. Starting now. So I watch the sky, the dawn of a new day. With Nick.

  Live in the moment. My motto, it has suddenly taken on a whole new meaning. Because of the great guy holding me in his arms.

  “Thanks for being my wedding date.” Nick kisses my hair.

  I smile. “Thanks for inviting me.”

  One date to a wedding and my world just got a whole lot more complicated. Funny how life can turn on a dime. The knowledge grounds me and terrifies me at the same time. Because anything can change in an instant. Including this shiny new relationship.

  Leaning tighter into Nick, I place my hands on his arms. He’s safe and warm. With him is right where I want to be. The How long? question doesn’t matter. Not now. All that matters is that he’s here with me today, and tomorrow, and however many days to come.

  The possibilities are endless, indeed.

  Chapter 14

  Nick

  Since I had driven to Hawk House with Chris, Cami drives me home. It’s a fun ride and the distance between the Montauk Parkway and the LIE is filled with heavy flirting, lots of banter, and miles of Bluetooth featuring bad ’80s and ’90s songs. By bad, I mean catchy, earworm, remember-the-damn-songs-all-day bad. There is even an off-the-beaten-path hot-dog truck with what the awning said were THE HAMPTON’S BEST HOT DOGS. Forget the quality of the food or possible health code violations. There’s nothing hotter than Camille, leaning against her crimson metallic Mustang EcoBoost convertible, taking a huge bite of a hot dog.

  She’s real, down-to-earth, sensual, funny, and makes me hard as hell for her. Add a sleek muscle car and it’s a deadly combination. I should’ve known Cami would drive a sexy sports car. Somehow, I didn’t think about it, but it suits her sassy, independent personality to perfection. It’s complete with lots of gadgets like rearview cameras and navigation, yet has an old-school design vibe, which I like. That and the fact that she bought it used. She said she couldn’t afford a classic. All I can think of are the classics I’ve worked on in my spare time. I can’t wait to show her the ones I’ve got in my garage. And cook her dinner. I think I’ll do both when we get to my place.

  After the hot dogs, and some heavy making out, I manage to convince her to let me drive. We cruise with the top down, the chill having subsided and the warm sun shining bright. Her hair is tied in a messy bun thing and she’s rocking shades, a turtleneck, leather jacket, and jeans—all in black. When she smiles at me, she’s incandescent. It’s amazing how she illuminates my soul or, dare I admit it, my heart. I feel lighter with her, like the world is brighter. Perhaps it’s because Camille is forever making me laugh.

  Holding her hand on our drive is my thing now. I don’t think about it, I just do it. When she gives me t
hat squeeze, the one that lets me know she’s there, that she’s smiling at me, laughing at one of my goofy jokes, my heart feels larger. I never thought of myself as the Grinch, except now. Cami seems to bring out the best in me. Everything seems brighter and more promising when she’s around.

  I live in the same gated community as Chris, and when we stop at the gate Cami whistles.

  “Isn’t this nice?” Her sarcasm is in full form.

  Turning to her while the gate opens, I lower my sunglasses, peering at her above them. “It’s pretentious as fuck, but I’ve got the largest lot, plenty of privacy, and I’m close to Chris.”

  “At least you’ve got your priorities straight.”

  I rev the engine. “Hey—”

  “Shut up and drive, sports stud.” She smiles again, and I forget what I was about to say. Instead I make a right and drive away from the main drag where the most famous celebrities live. Sports stars like Chris, local politicians, and TV stars. People far more famous and influential than me. I like being on the outskirts of this subdivision. Away from most residents. My lot is large because I bought the vacant lots next door and there’s nothing but trees surrounding my plot of land. My house might not be the largest in here, but that’s okay. I prefer nature: the land, the woods, the grass that I mow myself on my tractor—that’s my nickname for my riding mower.

  Though I grew up as a city kid in Michigan, I like fixing up old cars and tending to my own lawn. I guess I’m a little country. Or a little blue-collar. God knows I’ve worked hard for what I’ve got. ESPN once said I’m “a blue-collar guy in a rich man’s world.” In spite of everything said about me, both before and since, that one reference seems to sum me up best. That’s why none of the excess ever gets to my head. Because I’d rather be on a patch of land on a riding mower or working on old cars in my supersized garage.

  We turn on to my long winding paved driveway leading to my house. It’s surrounded by dense woods and not at all visible from the street. Neither is my large backyard. I’ve buffered it well, intentionally.