Through the Shattered Looking Glass

by Crane, M. L.

  “Alice…”

  Alice froze with her hand hovering over the lock, and her heart skipped a beat. She hadn’t heard anyone come into the restroom.

  “Alice…”

  “H-hello?” Alice squeaked, her voice tight and timid.

  “Alice…”

  Alice’s eyes grew wide, a chill ran down her spine, and she slowly backed away from the stall door. She’d heard that voice before. It was the same icy voice she’d heard in her nightmares.

  What the hell?! This can’t be happening! How is this possible? Alice thought.

  Alice spun around and looked back to where she had been sitting on the floor, as though she had expected to see herself fast asleep. Realizing that she was not dreaming, she turned back to face the stall door.

  “Who’s there!” Alice demanded. Her voice rushed out in a high pitch as fear gripped her throat.

  Alice waited for a response, but none came. She inched her way to the stall door and cautiously reached out towards it, her hand trembling. She slid the lock open and slowly opened the door and peeked her head out.

  “Hello?” Her voice was barely a whisper as her throat continued to tighten.

  Alice looked around the restroom and found that there was no one there. She was hesitant about leaving the stall. She took a timid step forward and called out again. “Hello? Is there someone in here?”

  Alice was alone.

  Alice exhaled loudly as a rush of relief washed over her. She laughed nervously feeling embarrassed and thankful that no one had seen or heard her making a fool of herself.

  Alice hurried to one of the sinks and turned on the faucet. She cupped her hands and filled them with cold water. She gulped down several handfuls of water bringing moisture back to her dry, sticky mouth and relieving the sandpaper grit in her throat. Once she quenched her thirst, she splashed some of the cold water on her face.

  Alice stared at her reflection in the mirror feeling incredibly disappointed in herself.

  “Nice one, Alice. She was your first patient, and you completely flipped out. You’ll be lucky if Dr. Pelletier will even bother letting you keep your internship. What is the matter with you? Come on Alice; you can do this!” Alice said to her reflection, forcing a smile on her face. She grumbled and rolled her eyes, and left the restroom.

  As Alice walked towards the meeting room, she could see Dr. Pelletier standing in the hallway, waiting for her. The expression on his face was difficult to read. Her shoulders slumped and a lump formed in her throat.

  Well, here goes nothing, thought Alice.

  “Dr. Pelletier, I am so sorry. I’m not sure what happened. I hope you will give me another chance, please. I think I’m just a bit nervous and…”

  Dr. Pelletier held up his hand to stop her from rambling on. “Alice, there is no need for you to apologize. You are doing a wonderful job. Don’t be so hard on yourself. I told you, Whitney can be quite difficult to talk to. But I believe that you have made more progress with her than you realize.”

  Alice looked at Dr. Pelletier questioningly, “Really? What makes you say that?”

  “Because,” Dr. Pelletier said with an air of confidence, “I think that the tune that she was humming means something to her. Personally, I have never heard it before. That is, until today.”

  Alice didn’t know how to respond to that.

  Alice looked past Dr. Pelletier and stared at the meeting room door. Her stomach immediately turned sour. A mixture of dread and a burning desire for answers, bubbled and festered inside of her.

  A part of Alice wanted to call the whole thing off. She just wanted to turn around and run far away from the Institute and never look back. But another part of her wanted…no…needed to know who Whitney was.

  Dr. Pelletier sensed Alice’s apprehension. He placed a hand on her shoulder and squeezed it gently.

  “I promise, all of your questions will be answered in good time.”

  Alice looked at Dr. Pelletier with confusion. What did he mean by that? But before she could question him about his strange remark, she heard the familiar clopping of Nurse Allen’s heavy shoes hurrying towards them.

  “Hey, what’s up buttercup? So, how’d everything go?”

  Alice smiled at her stiffly, “Fine. Everything went just fine.”

  “Well, okay then. Are you free to grab a cup of tea with me now?”

  Dr. Pelletier cleared his throat and said, “Yes, go on Alice. I think that’ll be enough for today.”

  Dr. Pelletier let go of Alice’s shoulder and turned to Nurse Allen. “Alice was fantastic! I suspect we’re going to see great things from her. If I’m not careful, she may even take my job!” He glanced at Alice and winked, and then turned his attention back to Nurse Allen. “I’ll be in my office if you need me. Please, excuse me.”

  Dr. Pelletier began walking towards the direction of his office. He stopped and turned to Alice and said, “Oh, and Alice? Why don't you and I meet again the same time tomorrow?”

  “I look forward to it,” said Alice, feeling suspicious of the man she admired.

  CHAPTER SIX

  Alice sat quietly in the cafeteria with Nurse Allen, sipping her tea absent-mindedly. Her mind was busy searching for an explanation to Dr. Pelletier’s unusual remark. What did he mean when he said that all of her questions would be answered soon? Was he keeping something about Whitney from her? Or, was she just being paranoid?

  “So, I’m going to assume by your gloomy mood, that it didn’t quite go as well as Dr. Pelletier claimed it did. What’s wrong?” Nurse Allen asked.

  Alice gave Nurse Allen the best fake smile she could muster up and said, “Oh no, it was great! Really. It was. I’m just, well, I was just thinking I guess.”

  “About what?”

  Alice set down her teacup and thought carefully before responding. “What do you know about Whitney?”

  “Whitney who?”

  “Whitney Roberts. The young girl I met today. What do you know about her?”

  Nurse Allen set down her cup of tea and thought for a moment. “Hm, not much really. She’s never actually spoken to me. Why do you ask?”

  “Oh, no reason I guess. It’s just…” Alice paused, regretting the conversation.

  “Just what?”

  “Nothing. Never mind. So, how’s your day been?” Alice asked, wanting to change the subject.

  Alice picked up her tea cup and resumed sipping the lukewarm beverage. She nodded her head and offered up a few mhm’s and huh’s, while she pretended to listen to Nurse Allen.

  Alice’s thoughts had shifted to Rose. All she wanted to do was go home and tell her everything.

  ~~~~~

  Alice’s beach house was a quaint one-story cottage that looked like it had been pulled straight out of the pages of a fairy tale. It was a pale shade of sea foam green with little white shutters on the windows. It had a wide front porch where Alice and Rose spent most of their time. On one end of the porch, there was a small patio table and two wooden folding chairs, where Alice and Rose often enjoyed their morning tea. On the other end, there was a porch swing where the two young women sat every evening and traded gossip like a couple of schoolgirls.

  That night, while they sat huddled together on the swing, Alice recounted her day. Rose listened eagerly with wide eyes like a child being told a bedtime story.

  "And then," Alice said, "she just started screaming. She was yelling at me to hide from the monsters. But the worst part was the humming. I swear she was humming the exact same tune from the music box I had when I was a little girl."

  "Oh my God. That is really creepy!" Rose shivered dramatically which made Alice laugh.

  “Well, maybe she’s psychic or something! I mean, that would explain how she knew so much about you. Maybe she created a spiritual link with you and tapped into your memories,” Rose suggested excitedly.

  Alice snickered and rolled her eyes.

  “What?! I’m serious! I know a lot of kids with psychic powers.” />
  Alice raised one eyebrow and looked at Rose doubtfully. “Oh. Really. Name one.”

  Rose shrugged her shoulders. “Okay, so I don’t personally know any psychic kids. But that’s not the point! The point is, I have heard about kids with these incredible powers. All I’m saying is just to consider the possibility. You should never underestimate the mind’s abilities.”

  Alice snuggled up close to Rose and twirled one of Rose’s scarlet red ringlets around her finger. She took a deep breath, inhaling Rose’s sweet, sensual aroma.

  “You should have seen her, Rose. I’ve never seen anything like it before in my life. She was beautiful but…strange. She had pure white hair and lavender eyes. Have you ever seen lavender eyes before?”

  “Hm. Maybe she’s albino or something. Or, maybe she’s not from this world! Maybe she’s a being from another planet. That would explain her psychic abilities. Or, better yet, maybe she’s you from another dimension, and the travel through the wormhole totally fucked up her appearance. And now she’s stuck here, and it’s slowly driving her insane!”

  Alice chuckled and playfully slapped Rose’s leg and got up from the swing. Rose watched with concern while Alice paced back and forth.

  Rose got up from the swing and put her arms around Alice. “Baby, what’s the matter?”

  Alice wanted to tell Rose about the voice she had heard in the restroom, but she wasn’t sure how. How do you tell someone that you’re hearing voices without sounding like you should probably check yourself into the Lutwidge Mental Health Institute?

  “Well,” Alice began cautiously, “I could just be tired, or maybe it was my nerves getting to me, but something strange happened to me today in the restroom.”

  “What happened?”

  Alice looked at the concern on her lover’s face and immediately regretted saying anything. “Nothing, never mind.” Alice pulled herself out of Rose’s embrace and went back to the porch swing and sat down.

  “Oh, hell no.” Rose marched over to Alice, shaking her finger at her. “You can not tell me something happened to you in a bathroom while you were taking a piss and then say, oh, never mind. And in a looney bin, of all places!”

  “I wasn’t taking a piss, and you really shouldn’t call it a looney bin.”

  Rose threw her hands up in the air. “Whatever! Like that matters! You better tell me what happened, or so help me, this Rose will unleash a fury of thorns that you won’t soon forget!”

  Try as she might, Alice couldn’t stifle her laugh.

  With her emerald green eyes piercing Alice like daggers, Rose stood there with her hands on her hips, tapped her foot fiercely, making her scarlet red curls bounce.

  Alice realized that Rose was sincerely worried and felt ashamed for laughing at her.

  “You’re going to think I’m crazy.”

  “So, what’s new. I already know that you are.”

  Alice sighed and proceeded to tell Rose everything. She told her about the voice she had heard calling out to her in the restroom. She told her about the nightmares she’d been having, and that the voice she’d heard in the restroom was the same voice as the shadowy figure from her dreams. When Alice finished, she waited for Rose to respond.

  Rose stood there for a moment, just staring at Alice. Then she sat down on the porch swing next to Alice, and for the first time, she didn’t seem to have anything to say.

  “Rose, please say something.”

  Rose looked at Alice and gently cupped Alice’s face in her hands. “Baby, I’m so sorry. I hate to break it to you, but I think you’ve gone round the bend. You are completely bat-shit crazy, out of your mind, coo-coo for Cocoa Puffs. Would you like me to call the Institute and have them make up a bed for you?”

  “You’re such a shit!” Alice shouted and playfully shoved Rose.

  “Well, first of all, you deserve it for not telling me that you’ve been having nightmares. Second of all, maybe while you were sitting there on the disease ridden floor, hiding from the small extraterrestrial child and contemplating your poor decisions, you fell asleep briefly and started dreaming about the weird shadow thingy.”

  Alice sighed and looked out towards the beach. “Yeah, you’re probably right.”

  “Look, if the kid bothers you that much, why don’t you just tell Dr. Pelletier that you can’t do it, and call it quits? You don’t have to do this if you don’t want to.”

  “I can’t quit. I really need this internship. Besides, I’m probably making a big deal over nothing.”

  And Alice knew deep down, that she was right. She couldn’t leave. Even if she wanted to.

  CHAPTER SEVEN

  The burning monster was closing in on her. Alice could smell its charred flesh, and hear the flames sizzle and crackle as the demonic beast burned. She could feel the heat from its personal inferno on her back as it reached out and tried to grab hold of her.

  Please, no more! I can’t run anymore! Alice thought desperately to herself. The muscles in her legs ached, threatening to give out on her at any moment.

  In the distance she saw the shadowy figure slowly taking form, waiting for her.

  Fear turned to anger. “WHAT DO YOU WANT FROM ME?! WHY WON’T YOU JUST LEAVE ME ALONE?!” Alice screamed.

  But as Alice drew nearer to the thing that awaited her, she realized that it wasn’t the shadowy figure at all. It was Dr. Pelletier.

  Alice was overcome with euphoria.

  Forgetting about her aching legs, Alice ran faster. Leaving her fears behind to burn with the monster. The only thing that mattered at that very moment was reaching Dr. Pelletier. She wanted to throw herself into his protective arms, and press herself so tight against him that he could never let go.

  “Dr. Pelletier! Dr. Pelletier!” Alice shouted excitedly, waving her arms wildly above her head.

  Dr. Pelletier had his arms stretched out wide, beckoning Alice to come to him.

  Alice turned and looked behind her. She saw that the burning monster was no longer chasing her. It had vanished. It was finally over. For the first time in what seemed like forever, Alice finally felt safe.

  When Alice reached Dr. Pelletier, she threw herself into his arms. She closed her eyes tight and buried her face into his chest. Alice relaxed as she deeply inhaled the earthy sweet aroma of his cigars. Like a child in the comfort of a parent’s warm embrace, she wanted it to last for all of eternity.

  Alice looked up into Dr. Pelletier’s blue-grey eyes, tears of joy running down her cheeks. “I knew I could trust you! I just knew it!”

  He grinned and said, “There, there. Of course, you can trust me. I won’t hurt you, Alice. You are perfectly safe here. Stay with us, Alice. Stay with us forever.”

  Something was wrong. His voice was…cold.

  “Dr. Pelletier? Are you all right?”

  Alice slowly backed away from him and saw that they were no longer standing in the middle of the street. They were inside of a padded room. And in Dr. Pelletier’s hand, he was clutching a straight jacket.

  “What’s happening? Where am I?” Panic rose in Alice’s voice.

  “Stay with us, Alice. Look at this pretty coat I have for you,” Dr. Pelletier said and held out the straight jacket. “Put it on. Put it on Alice, and you can stay here forever.”

  “No! No! This can’t be happening! You’re not Dr. Pelletier! Get away from me!” Alice had backed herself up against one of the padded walls, unable to get away.

  “But this is where you belong. Welcome home, Alice…” his voice was changing. It was becoming the icy voice Alice had become so familiar with. A voice she had heard countless times before.

  “I’m coming, Alice. It won’t be much longer now. I’m coming for you!”

  Alice watched in horror as Dr. Pelletier’s face began to distort as it sagged and drooped. His features melted away and turned black. His silhouette blurred and faded until the only thing left standing there was the shadowy figure.

  ~~~~~

  “NOOO!”
/>   Alice bolted upright in her bed, screaming out into the darkness. Her hair was matted around her face, and she was drenched with sweat. With her eyes squeezed shut, she clutched her blanket tight against her chest and panted heavily.

  “It was just a dream. It was just a dream. It was just a dream,” Alice repeated to herself.

  When Alice had finished her chant, she took several deep breaths and calmed herself down. She relaxed and slowly released the death grip she had on her blanket. Alice opened her eyes and looked around her room.

  A beam of moonlight shown through her window, casting unusual shadows on the wall. Something wasn’t right. She felt strangely out of place.

  Alice glanced down at the blanket she’d been clutching. It was a heavy white blanket that Alice couldn’t recall ever owning.

  “What the…?”

  The mattress Alice was laying on was so thin that she could feel the hard metal frame right through it. It was not her bed.

  “Rose!” Alice shouted, but found that Rose was not there. She patted the bed frantically as though by some miracle Rose was hidden somewhere under the blanket.

  Alice threw the blanket off of herself and jumped up from the bed as though it were on fire. The floor was hard and painfully cold on her feet. She looked down and saw plain white tiles where her warm plush carpet should have been.

  Alice began spinning in circles, searching the room while panic rose inside of her.

  “What the hell is going on? Where am I? Rose! Where are you? ROSE!”

  Alice ran to the door and tried to open it. It was locked.

  “Hello? Is anyone there? Hello? Please, someone, help me! LET ME OUT OF HERE!”

  Alice pulled and twisted the handle, but to no avail. She pounded on the door with both of her fists, hoping that someone would hear her.

  Suddenly, Alice heard someone on the other side of the door. She jumped back, startled when she saw someone peeking through a small window in the door. It was a nurse, observing her as though she were a lab rat in a cage. That was when the sickening realization struck Alice. She was in an Institute.