Desire of the Soul
Page 7
false critiques.
This time the party was held at Brittany’s house. The doorbell rang and Jessica got up to open the door. She was a bit wobbly, but eventually made it to the door. Mark was standing on the other side of the door and she invited him in. She hugged him, which made her feel better, and showed him where to get the drinks.
By now all the people Brittany had invited had arrived and Jessica was still the only one drunk. As far as she could tell it was as if no one else had anything to drink. She sat next to Mark on the couch and burst into conversation with what was on her mind. Mark listened intently and seemed to understand her whilst he sipped his beer.
____________
The birds chirped and Jimmy could smell the ocean from where he was in the cliffs. Green surrounded him as he stared out over the blue horizon. The sun was setting but there was still an hour of good light left. He rode his bike into the hills overlooking Malibu and was now on his computer and tried to type out some lyrics.
As quiet as it was with no other sounds but the nature, Jimmy could not help but think about Jessica. He guessed that she was at someone’s party trying to get drunk if not already. He hated the thought of knowing what she was doing and not trying to warn her of what could happen if she drank too much and so on. He knew that it was not his responsibility to tell her what to do, but he just could not shake off the thoughts.
The perfect evening with Jessica kept playing in his mind. He knew that it probably would never happen, but he just couldn’t help thinking about it. He started to type his thoughts out into a document. After he was done, he had a great idea. He thought it would be a great idea to make a book about his fantasy life with Jessica. He would, of course, make a story out of it.
He thought about selling it, but he would need to finish it before he could even think about selling anything. He could also use it as another way of earning money on top of his job at a small recording studio. He edited music for some small, up-and-coming bands. He didn’t get much from them, but he also got money from his parents.
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“Oh, this morning was so bad. I woke up with such a headache it wasn’t even funny. Then when I got home my parents made this huge deal about me getting drunk. I couldn’t hide it from them this time,” Jessica told Amy over dinner. Amy had hosted the party when Jessica started drinking for the first time. She had also been part of the girls who pressured Jessica into drinking.
“I told you to stop drinking but you were already drunk by the time I came to Britt’s,” Amy replied.
“Well, I don’t remember that. Heck, I don’t remember anything after I saw you. What happened?”
“Well, after things warmed up you and Mark were on the couch and getting pretty close. Where do you know this guy from?”
“We met at the beach the other day. He is a real nice guy.”
“Well, obviously, the way you were all over him last night. Psh.”
“And that is not your business, Amy.”
“Alright, I guess you don’t want to know what happened later then.”
Jessica hated how Amy always did this; if Jessica got annoyed with something Amy always had something to say to draw a question out from Jessica. Jessica tried to resist the urge to ask Amy what had happened. A few seconds of silence later Jessica gave in and asked, “OK, so what happened?”
“Nothing much. You got more drinks and talked with a few others,” Amy said.
“Oh, great, so I didn’t do anything stupid,” Jessica said relived.
“Well, if you want my opinion getting drunk and being under aged isn’t one of the smartest.”
“I mean that Mark and I didn’t, er, leave the couch, if you know what I mean.”
“Oh, yeah, you guys didn’t do that last night. But, he seemed pretty close to taking you off the couch.”
“Well, it’s good that you are at the parties to keep him off me.”
“Yeah,” Amy said not convinced that Jessica would try hard to keep Mark off of her.
____________
Jimmy was having a lot of trouble trying to decide what to do about Jessica. He liked her more than a friend, but knew that if he were to take their relationship further it could end up coming back at him. He didn’t know what to do. Most of him wanted to go for it and by doing that he would hope that she would accept it. After all, if she rejected him then it was worth the try.
Then Jimmy recalled his earlier conversation with his youth pastor which opposed his own argument:
“Sit. So what baffling questions do you have on your mind for me today?” Frederick Curtis asked, his hands clasped together and leaning back in his chair. The office was cold as the last rays of sunlight shone through a window.
“Well, Fred, it’s about dating,” Jimmy replied, his face expressionless.
“Ha ha, I never knew you liked someone, who is it? Kelsey?” Fred asked humorously. Jimmy frowned at Fred for not taking the matter seriously. Fred got the message and sat up right; forearms resting on the armrests. “What can I help you with, son?”
“Thanks, now she isn’t a believer and I wanted your opinion on what I should do.”
“I see, well, who might this girl be?” Fred inquired and dug in one of the drawers and revealed a Bible. He flipped through the fine gold rimmed paper.
“Uh, I’d rather not say a name.”
“Alright, so you want me to tell you what I think of it or what the Bible says?”
“Both, although I’d rather not want to hear either.”
“Then why did you come to me then?”
“Because I didn’t want to do anything irrational.”
“Ah hah, so you know that it might be wrong or that people will downplay it.”
“I guess, now please get on with it.”
“Alright, alright. The Bible teaches us that we should not be yoked together with unbelievers. It says here in 2 Corinthians 6:14-16, ‘Do not be yoked together with unbelievers. For what do righteousness and wickedness have in common? Or what fellowship can light have with darkness? What harmony is there between Christ and Belial? Or what does a believer have in common with an unbeliever? What agreement is there between the temple of God and idols? For we are the temple of the living God. As God has said,
“I will live with them
and walk among them,
and I will be their God,
and they will be my people.”’
“You see, light and darkness is like the Christian and the non-Christian. Where there is light there cannot be darkness; it just doesn’t work.”
“But isn’t that about marrying them? I only want to date her now. I’m not thinking about marrying her now.”
“How do you know? You may get so attached to her that you can’t let go. You know what a yoke does, right?” Jimmy nodded. “Where one animal goes the other will go. It happens even if you aren’t married. Trust me, I have had a few friends whom have gone stray from their faith to be with a girl whom they thought were made for each other.”
“But it’s not like she is a bad person, she isn’t wicked like the verse says. She also doesn’t worship any idols. Also, what if by me dating her she starts to come to church and then becomes a believer? You never know right?”
“More often than not it is the believer who drifts away from their faith in God. Like I said, some of my friends have gone too far to turn back.”
“But Jessica really needs Christ and maybe if I date her she will listen to me.”
“You don’t mean Jessica Hall the singer, do you?”
“I mentioned her name, didn’t I?”
“Yes, you did.”
“Well thanks for your help, it wasn’t what I wanted to hear. Besides, it tells us not to marry one, it says nothing about dating them,” Jimmy said then stood up abruptly. Fred got up and grabbed Jimmy’s arm. “Just remember one thing: you can always pray for her instead of making the wrong choice.”
“Who says that this is the wrong choice? And I’ve prayed f
or like years for her and God hasn’t answered it yet. It’s about time that I make it happen.”
“Jimmy, God will do things in His own time. His plan is the best one.”
“Yeah, well, we don’t have time for His plan,” Jimmy said and stormed off. Just before the door closed he heard Fred say, “She has already gotten to him. Father help him…” and then the door shut completely.
TEN
The house was empty as Jessica crept into her father’s office. She tried not to mess anything up so her father would not know anyone had messed with his things. A mahogany book case held all of her father’s books. It ran along the length of the wall and went all the way up to the ceiling. It was filled with instruction manuals and books from his favorite authors. He was an electrician and ran a family business. He taught himself many of the things he knows. He was largely successful until they moved to Malibu where business was slower.
The books weren’t the things Jessica was looking for. She sat at his computer and pressed the power button. The computer whirled to life and startled Jessica, because it had been quiet when she entered. To her dismay the computer asked for a password to log in under her father's account. She raked her brain, trying to find a password to enter. She went for the obvious one and typed in her home address. After she hit enter she remembered that her father’s password only had six characters in it. She tried her home address again but took out a few characters, but to no avail. She knew that after three wrong attempts the computer would fry itself and would be rendered useless.
She weighed the odds; get it right and then she