The Winter Games

by Sharp, Dr. Rebecca

OF COURSE, IT’S ALL ABOUT WHAT YOU WANT.

  EMMETT

  NO. TRUST ME. IT’S NOT.

  I shoved my phone forcefully into my back pocket. I shouldn’t believe him; I was upset that I wasn’t going to see him after last night and that he didn’t seem to be fazed at all. Because he did things like that all the time with girls, that’s why, Ally. I didn’t want to believe him in the slightest.

  And yet, for some stupid reason, I did.

  My frustration helped dull the discomfort of tackling the stairs again—still somewhat of an obstacle for my sore muscles.

  “Where are we going?” I asked as I grabbed my purse.

  “Jess said Rue 52 if that works for you?” Tam replied as we walked out the front door and I locked it behind us.

  “Yeah, they have nice stuff.”

  I pulled my phone from my pocket as I went to sit in the car and noticed I had another message from him.

  EMMETT

  IF THIS WERE ABOUT WHAT I WANTED, SOME PART OF ME WOULD BE INSIDE SOME PART OF YOU RIGHT NOW.

  Buzz.

  EMMETT

  ACTUALLY, IT WOULD HAVE BEEN THAT WAY ALL NIGHT.

  Buzz.

  EMMETT

  BECAUSE I NEVER WANT TO LEAVE YOU.

  Crap. Crap. Double-freaking-crap.

  “Everything ok?” Tammy glanced over at me as she drove. “I can’t tell if you are happy or upset. You have this weird smile on your face.”

  “Just… Emmett.” As if his name could explain everything.

  “Should I assume things went… well… then yesterday?” That was Tammy’s best attempt at prying.

  I bit my lip and giggled. It would probably scar her to know exactly what happened yesterday. “Let’s just say that after yesterday I’m sore in places I didn’t even know existed—several of which I don’t think have anything to do with snowboarding.”

  “Oh my…” My stand-in mom’s face turned bright red as we parked. “Well, before you go any further, maybe you should wait until we meet Jessa so that I’m only shocked one time.”

  We both laughed as she teased me and I playfully swatted her before we got out of the car, heading towards our third Musketeer who would most definitely want to hear all the juicy details.

  “Oh, my God…” That was all Jessa had said for the past thirty minutes as I relayed what had happened between Emmett and me last night. “That is so hot, Ally!” She squealed. Again. “My excitement is only slightly diminished because I still remember him like he was in high school, but still…”

  “They all haven’t changed much since,” Tammy interrupted wryly. “Although, I do have to say that the way Emmett is concerned about you all the time, I’ve never seen him care… like that… about anyone.”

  “Even if he is an asshole in how he goes about it,” Jessa said wryly, handing me a blue dress off one of the racks. “He seriously didn’t text you this morning to tell you he wasn’t stopping to see you? What the hell…”

  I held it up against my chest.

  “Ooo, nice.” She nodded and approved before continuing her rant, “I think I might need to have a talk with the King…”

  “You don’t have to do that, Jessa,” I said, but her eye roll said she begged to differ. “So, what are my birthday plans again?”

  “First, we are going for sushi—because I’ve found that seems to work well when drinking tons of alcohol.” If Texas had taught this girl one thing—besides her accent—it was how to hold her liquor. “Then we’re going to Peak’s Pub for drinking and dancing; I wish there was karaoke, Al, but they are having some local band playing all weekend for Valentine’s Day.”

  I exhaled deeply. Even though I wasn’t excited for my birthday, I knew my girls would make it a good time.

  “How’s studying going?” Tammy asked her; Jessa was determined to take her licensing exam soon so she’d been studying like crazy.

  “Good. I think I’ll be ready next month. Hopefully.” She crossed her fingers. “You should have called me yesterday when Ally fell! What the hell, guys!”

  “You’ll be fine. And I was fine. You would have only interrupted my night of relaxation and healing,” I said with a delicious grin.

  Jessa snorted. “Yeah, I bet. I can’t tell you how many times Chance—“

  “Ok! That’s enough!” I plugged my ears and walked a few feet away, laughing. “The only thing I want to know about my brother is what happened between the two of you.”

  I saw the shadow that crossed over her face. She tried to hide whatever happened between them, either avoiding mention of my brother all together or mentioning him in jest.

  “High school, Al. It was a long time ago. Well, for some of us,” she said bitterly.

  I saw Tammy’s face; she knew what happened. Everyone, but me.

  “Why can’t you tell me? Why am I the only one who doesn’t get to know?” I was hurt. “If my brother was a jerk, I can take it; I know he can be an asshole. I’ll be the first one to nominate him for the title.”

  Jessa shook her head and wrapped my stiff form into a hug. “I’m sorry, Al. If it was your brother’s fault, I would. But, it was mine. I was the asshole. And the thing is, I wouldn’t change my actions—I wouldn’t change how I hurt him. And the last thing I want is for you to know the truth and never look at me the same again.”

  Crap. “Jessa, I would never hate you or judge you. You’re my best friend. I won’t push you, but I just want to be here for you like you’ve been here for me over these past months. So, I love you and I will love you just the same even if you decide to tell me.”

  We stood like fools in the middle of the Rue 52 floor, hugging and borderline-sobbing in between a row of very questionable cheetah-print leggings and a table of comfy-looking, winter sweaters.

  “Thanks, Al…” She sighed against me. “Alright, before they start filming us for the next episode of Dr. Phil, let’s find you something sexy to wear for your birthday.”

  Jessa darted off towards the dresses, expecting Tammy and me to follow.

  “So, are you going to be at the lessons this week?”

  “Of course!” I wasn’t going to be beaten—by the mountain or by Emmett. If he was avoiding me, thinking that I was giving up on snowboarding—or on him—he had another thing coming.

  She laughed. “Good! I can’t wait to see your sister’s face.”

  We spent the next twenty minutes trying on dresses. As Channing would always say, she and Chance may have gotten the ‘snow-gene’, but I had inherited the ‘smoking-gene’. Mostly everything I tried on looked good; it was just a matter of what I felt like wearing.

  We paid and as soon as we stepped back outside, I heard my phone buzzing.

  “Hello?”

  “Hey, where are you?” My brother answered.

  “Out shopping. What’s up?”

  “I’m at the house to check on you. You think it’s a good idea for you to be out after yesterday?”

  “It was just for like an hour. I can head back now if you want to wait.” I looked to the girls, mouthing an apology since we’d talked about going to grab a bite before we left.

  “I’ll be here.”

  I hung up. “Sorry, guys. Chance wants to see me. Raincheck?”

  At the mention of her ex, Jessa ducked her head.

  “Of course, I can take you home,” Tammy smiled. “I have a doctor’s appointment this afternoon anyway, so I should be heading back.”

  “I’ll talk to you guys later,” Jess said, recovering quickly and hugging us both.

  “Hello!” I yelled as soon as I walked through the front door.

  Chance rounded the corner from the kitchen and pulled me in for a hug, spinning me around. This was the brother that I knew; he rarely appeared nowadays.

  He pulled my face back and began to examine my eyes. “Well… you look like you’ll pull through…”

  “Jerk.” I smacked his arm. “Sorry I wasn’t here. I didn’t expect you to be back from Denver so soon.” As we
walked to the kitchen, I noticed a small duffel-bag sitting by the top of the stairs; he must have come to take more of his stuff over to Nick’s.

  “Frost and I left after Tammy called. Well, as soon as we could… which was pretty late.” I set my bag on the stairs. “Then, this morning I had to go see Emmett about something he’s working on for me, figured you’d still be sleeping.”

  My heart flipped. So that was why he hadn’t texted me. Because Chance had been there.

  “I see.”

  “So, I have to ask. What are the birthday plans? Am I even invited?” he asked like he wouldn’t just show up anyway.

  I laughed. “Of course! Well, maybe not to dinner—that’s just for the girls. But we are just going up to the Pub afterward for drinking and dancing.”

  “I think I can handle that.” He grabbed the water bottle sitting on the counter. “But, as your big brother, I’m the first one who gets to buy you a birthday drink.” He pointed the cap-end at me.

  “Of course! And one from Channing, too!”

  “Don’t push it. I’m not letting you get wasted.”

  I rolled my eyes. “I don’t think Jessa or Tammy will let that happen.” I watched my brother’s jaw clench. This was the first time I’d mentioned her name in front of him. “Are you… going to be ok if she’s there?”

  “Of course.” Immediately his anger dissipated. “Why wouldn’t I be, munchkin?”

  I shrugged. Looks like I’m not getting answers from either party. Friday night should be interesting…

  “I don’t know…” I caught sight of the bag again. “Are you taking more stuff with you?” He just nodded. “Why don’t you just come back here? Channing is gone. It’s just me. I promise I won’t annoy you too much.”

  His laugh was sad and forced. “I don’t think that’s a good idea, munchkin. I’m sorry. Not right now at least.”

  “Do you want to talk about it?” From what Channing and I knew, he hadn’t talked to anyone about his fall, where he’d been, his recovery… anything. Except maybe Nick, but Nick Frost definitely wasn’t going to tell us anything; being helpful wasn’t his style.

  “I’m good, Ally. Not for you to worry about,” he reassured me.

  Everyone was always trying to protect me from getting hurt. Maybe if they knew I was already destroyed, they would treat me differently. “Shit. Mom’s calling.” He looked up at me. “Does she call you this much?”

  “Probably more.”

  “Did you tell her about your fall? Because I’m about to. I need someone to take the heat off of me.”

  “Don’t you dare!” I threw a kitchen towel at him.

  He smiled deviously. “I gotta run. I’ll see you Friday, sis.” He answered the phone as he walked out the door. “Hey, Ma. What’s up?”

  The front door closed and I dug inside my purse for my phone.

  ALLY

  WHY DIDN’T YOU TELL ME THAT IT WAS MY BROTHER THAT KEPT YOU BUSY THIS MORNING?

  EMMETT

  TRYING TO KEEP YOU TWO AS SEPARATED IN MY MIND AS POSSIBLE. PLUS, HE WASN’T THE ONLY THING. HOW R U FEELING?

  Still struggling with the little sister dilemma, Mr. Jameson? Let’s see what I can do about that…

  ALLY

  SORE. ACHY. LOTS OF BURNING PRESSURE. TINGLING.

  EMMETT

  UM WTF? ALL OF THAT IN YOUR HEAD IS NOT GOOD. ARE YOU ON YOUR WAY TO THE DOCTOR? BECAUSE IF YOU AREN’T, I WILL BE DRAGGING YOU THERE BY YOUR PRETTY LITTLE TITS IF NECESSARY.

  Tempting.

  ALLY

  WHO SAID ALL OF IT WAS IN MY HEAD? WHO SAID ANY OF IT WAS?

  ITS ACTUALLY MUCH LOWER DOWN.

  EMMETT

  FUCKING HELL.

  I laughed like a giddy high schooler—a thought that would only justify Emmett’s worst fears—sitting alone at my kitchen counter. I chewed on my lip, knowing that I was torturing the one man that I couldn’t stop thinking about. This wasn’t a crush. Zack had been a crush. Emmett… was dangerous; Emmett was the thing that could crush me or make me whole again.

  I WATCHED MY GIRL FALL for the second time this afternoon. She was doing so fucking well even after the nasty spill that she’d taken. I smiled as she smacked the snow next to her, standing right back up again. It was fucked up that I was slightly pleased when she fell, but the way she tortured me—with her dirty texts, that sexy smile, and, through no fault of her own, the way my hands itched to rip off her snow gear to see the body that lay beneath—meant that she deserved all the punishment that she got.

  I stayed with her the first half of the slope—not holding her again, but making sure she went slow and coaching her through the turns. She might not be like her twin siblings, but the girl could snowboard if she gave herself the chance. And if she had a board that was actually made for her.

  A little something that I’d been working on all yesterday.

  Really, a pretty fucking dumb idea considering how many orders I already had to fill, but I couldn’t stop myself. I want to make her her own board for her birthday. It was going to be the other half of my gift to her.

  “Not too bad there, sunshine. Glad to see the mountain didn’t scare you away.” We unstrapped and pushed over to the lift.

  “Well, if you didn’t manage to, the mountain certainly didn’t have a chance.”

  Fuck. Her sass made my dick so hard.

  “What?” Her goggles were down but I knew she was looking at me underneath. “Ask, sunshine. Whatever it is.”

  “Do you know what happened between Chance and Jessa?” Well, that wasn’t what I was expecting.

  “Yeah.”

  “Can you tell me?” Now, I knew where this was headed.

  “No. Not my story. Plus, it was a long fucking time ago. I’m sure they’re both over it.”

  She grumbled underneath her breath, “Wouldn’t seem that way…”

  “Why?”

  “My birthday on Friday… Tammy and Jess want to take me to the Pub for drinks and dancing. Chance is coming,” she paused and I knew she was wondering if I would be there too, “and he didn’t look thrilled that she would be there.”

  “Honestly, I’m surprised they haven’t run into each other yet. Although, your brother seems to be pretty occupied over at Frost’s. Not sure he gets out much.”

  “Is he ok?”

  “Are any of us?” Completely rhetorical. “Except you.” I winked at her and I wish I could have seen her face because I knew it would have told me more than her half-smile did.

  “I just don’t want my birthday to upset him more,” she mused.

  Her compassion—to the point of self-sacrifice—killed me. If she knew it would upset him, she’d cancel the whole thing to prevent it. That’s who she was. And that’s why it ate at me that she could want someone like me—a black hole for all the kind, caring people in the world to be destroyed by.

  I should fucking disappear from her life.

  But I wasn’t a good fucking person. I was selfish. I wanted her. I was fighting it—hoping she’d find a reason to hate me before it was too late. Because if not, I was going to take her.

  We got off the lift and I brooded on my self-loathing the entire way down the trail—a run that Ally didn’t fall once on.

  “They dated at the end of high school.” I didn’t know why I was bringing this back up again. A distraction for the both of us. “It kind of put a damper on our shit because he was obsessed with her. Especially because he’d starting medaling at so many events. His career was beginning to take off and she was planning on going to college in Texas so I don’t even know that it would have worked out anyway. But, after graduation, Frost had a huge party at his house to celebrate. And… something happened. Honestly, I wasn’t there—I was at the party, but I was…” I cleared my throat, “preoccupied.” I forget if it was with two blondes or three. “I learned the next day that some shit went down among the three of them. And a week later, Jessa moved south and that was it.”

  “How was Chance?”<
br />
  “He was pissed at Nick for a while, but that didn’t stop the three of us from going out… and stuff. In that respect, he was better than fucking new. He acted like he didn’t just want to forget Jessa; he acted like every girl he fucked shoved a dagger in her back that was thousands of miles away.” My eyes caught her shudder. “Sorry. Forgot I was talking to his sister.”

  “That’s a good thing, right?” she countered

  Shit, I groaned.

  “I wouldn’t be too sure or too excited, sunshine.”

  I worked with her down the slope and again, she fell one time—and even that wasn’t a complete wipe-out. Her determination and hell, her stubbornness, made me ache so badly for her. Thankfully, I was too damn proud of how well she was doing to let my arousal distract me. The fact is I was a terrible teacher, she had taken a fall that would have ended most beginners’ attempts, yet she was still here and doing fucking amazing.

  “Hey, guys!” I turned as Tammy jogged towards us after the lesson was over. The kids had run off to the lodge so it was just Ally and me walking back towards the equipment room. “How did it go today?” she asked with her typical caring smile.

  “Ok.” I heard Ally reply as Tammy hugged her briefly.

  “Are you fucking kidding me?” They both turned and stared at me. “You fell what… once? Twice?”

  “Three times—my butt was counting,” Ally teased as she folded her arms. “Why? Is that bad?”

  “Hell no,” I scoffed, looking at Tammy. “She’s doing fucking fantastic. Especially after the fall.”

  “That is really good, Al!” Tammy exclaimed. At least one of them was rational.

  “Really?”

  “I mean did you not see the rest of the class? Why do you think I have to work with them all the time? Seriously, you’re doing much better than most. Especially given my poor teaching abilities.”

  “I’m glad you got back out there.” Tammy said. “Alright, I have to head out. I have a doctor’s appointment. Emmett, can you please lock up?”