The Winter Games

by Sharp, Dr. Rebecca

  I’d never wanted anyone more.

  Or anything.

  Including winning every snowboarding competition. A sad fact that I’d realized earlier in the day when she’d thrown down the gauntlet. I wanted her more than I wanted this and it fucking stung.

  I’d never wanted anything more than winning until I was given the choice between winning and her. It was insane how quickly winning no longer mattered.

  “Chance.” My twin, Channing, jogged over to me, her helmet in her hand. She was competing tonight, too, against Frost; she always challenged the guys. I didn’t blame her—there was certainly no girl here worth her time. “Did you really challenge Emmett?”

  “Yeah.” I took another sip and handed her the bottle.

  “Why?” She drank too even though her blue eyes bored into my matching ones.

  Channing Ryder wasn’t a SnowmassHole. Mostly because she wasn’t an asshole. She was, however, one of our crew—Frost, King, and me. And she tried her damnedest to make sure we knew it—half the time people mistook her and her boyish attire for me. Especially in our snow gear.

  In spite of that, she didn’t need to know why I challenged King; he didn’t even know. “Don’t worry about it, Lil.”

  Bright blue caught my eye and I immediately stood. “Aren’t you and Frost up soon, anyway?” I brushed past her to my target—and my prize.

  The way Jessa filled out her snowpants and jacket was more impressive than fucking Vanna White. Long, ocean-colored curls escaped from underneath her hat and over her shoulder.

  “Where have you been?” My tone was too harsh, but every muscle and nerve in my body was on edge.

  My words were greeted with the fiery disapproving stare that she frequently inflicted on me. “I was studying.” Her arms crossed over her chest. “Are you really going to do this?”

  “Are you really going to be mine?”

  The frigid air crackled between us.

  “That’s what I said. But, I’m warning you right now, Chance. Whatever happens, I won’t let it affect my dreams. I know what I want and it means going back to Texas for my degree.” She almost looked like she didn’t even believe the words that were coming out of her mouth; I certainly almost didn’t. She’d been fucking turning me down for weeks… months… Every minute that she wasn’t here I wondered if I’d imagined our conversation earlier.

  “I don’t care.” And right now, I didn’t. One obstacle at a time. “The only thing I care about happening is you and me.” I stepped towards her, hauling her against me. Her head tipped up to mine and my mouth felt like cotton with the need to taste her and her warm sweetness. “As soon as fucking possible.”

  Wide hazel eyes stared into mine. “Ok.”

  Fuck it. I wanted one kiss before I went up there. My head dipped slowly. She didn’t pull away—a good sign.

  “Pride!” Emmett’s grating voice cut through the air, severing the moment.

  Our breaths mingled, but that was as much as I was getting right now.

  “You better be right here when I’m done.”

  “What happens then?” she whispered breathlessly.

  “The fucking rapture.”

  I never did anything that wasn’t completely certain that I could win. And because of those choices, I always won. And I earned the right to be proud not just of the accomplishment, but the implicit prudence that went into every decision that I made.

  I smacked my snowboard against the ground, knocking off the snow that had collected on it from getting off the lift.

  The dilemma that I faced tonight was that I couldn’t win without losing—either my pride or Jessa. I’d prepped myself, the excuses I would give to my friends later when I told them that I lost on purpose—when I told them that I was thinking with my dick. But excuses were all that they were.

  She was so much more.

  Like the mountain, she was strong and fierce. Grounded and free. I admired her beyond words. And I wanted to conquer her beyond reason.

  I held out my hand, signaling to Emmett that he should go first. Watching him drop onto the slope, I strapped into my board. Emmett was good enough to come close to beating me on a day when I didn’t throw the whole competition. I didn’t need to see what trick he pulled; I was about to eat my pride—no point in knowing how badly.

  Groaning, I adjusted my snowpants. As loose-fitting as they were, Jessa had still managed to make them uncomfortable; my dick pressing against the front, knowing she was down there waiting.

  “You’re good, Pride.” One of the newbies drew me from my thoughts.

  Nodding, I pulled on my goggles and flew down the trail and up into the air. I pulled a frontside grab—one of the most beginner tricks you could do. The thud of my board crushed my pride underneath it as I landed.

  I was met by the shocked silence of the crowd below. I watched their stunned gazes flick over me, mouths agape as the best snowboarder on the mountain lost to his best friend. King though… he had that smirk. Ironically, I didn’t care like I thought I would. My eyes just glanced over it, searching for the only thing that mattered.

  I unstrapped from my board while it still moved, shoving the thing in Emmett’s direction. I didn’t know if he wanted it, but I didn’t want to be bothered with him asking.

  Jessa stood frozen; her eyes on me, waiting as I came for her. Waiting for the snowsquall that had been brewing over the vast mountain of desire between us to finally make landfall and dump everything that we’d been holding back.

  Unclipping my helmet, I yanked it and my goggles off my head, tossing them to the ground a few feet before I reached her.

  “Mine,” I growled. “Only. Ever. Always.” The words were punctuated with my lips crushing hers.

  It was worth it.

  Losing was worth winning her.

  Present

  If I hadn’t seen jealousy spark in her eyes, I would have cut ties with Monroe the second she came over and acted like she owned me; I would have cut her down in the process, too.

  But, I did see it. And I needed to feed it if I was ever going to get close to Jessa again.

  This was how my girl worked. She had a plan; she had goals. She tried to ignore her desires and that was her downfall. How to win? Build those desires up so damn strong and then set them free with a single, simple act. I didn’t know what that was going to be yet, but I’d think of something. In the meantime, I had to watch my fiery Princess and her questions that I’d rather not revisit.

  I’d considered just ducking out after my session and dealing with Monroe later—if it hadn’t been for those questions. They made me angry because I wanted to answer them. So, the second I was done, I yelled for Monroe across the mostly empty gym and waited for her to come and do my bidding. And she did.

  It still had only marginally helped with my frustration—a result that I’d learned to expect and one that I’d complemented with a generous glass of Jack and a joint once I got back to Frost’s.

  The door to the clinic swung open violently from my push, smacking against the doorstop on the other side. Guess I was a little more frustrated than usual today.

  Then it was my turn to be stopped in my tracks, seeing my pink-haired princess chatting with the male PT—the one with the muscles and sunglasses that made him look like one of those tools they put in the Abercrombie & Fitch ads. My turn to be jealous. I didn’t care about controlling mine though—or trying to deny it.

  “Jessa.” Her name was more like a growl, stopping them both mid-sentence to turn and look at me as I stalked right into their conversation.

  She scowled. “What do you want, Chance?”

  “A word.”

  “Jessa…” Muscles-Glasses interjected, his tone one of concern, probably because I looked like a possessed-possessive wolf, snarling in his direction. She doesn’t have as much to be afraid of as you do, asswipe.

  I glared at her, just realizing that she wasn’t in her scrubs anymore. She was in fucking yoga pants, tank, and sports bra.
Everything molding completely to her.

  “It’s fine, Kyle.” My fist flexed as she gave him a sweet smile. “I just need to talk to my patient about his schedule for next week.”

  “You sure?” He looked at her like a lovesick protective puppy.

  Take a fucking hint.

  “I’ll see you on Saturday,” she said with a smile that he didn’t deserve.

  I was boiling. Red-fucking-hot.

  I stood unmoving, waiting for Muscles-Glasses to get far enough away. She, however, had no such concern.

  “What’s your problem, Chance? Monroe not cutting it for you this afternoon? Getting a little too handsy? I figured you’d enjoy putting her in her place,” she whipped at me as soon as Kyle climbed in his truck, still watching us from underneath his shades.

  She crossed her arms over her chest, pushing. On purpose.

  As soon as he pulled out of the lot, I moved towards her and she had the good sense to back up—at least until her back hit the door of her truck and she had nowhere else to go. “What the fuck is Saturday?”

  There was space between us but only when we exhaled.

  “None of your business.”

  My hands moved and pressed onto the window on either side of her face as I bent down next to her cheek. “Everything about you is my fucking business.”

  “N-no.” My little liar. Her chest shook against mine. “Not anymore.”

  “Always,” I rasped against her soft, jasmine skin. The scent rocketing straight through my body, pulling at my need for her harder than anything.

  Eight years ago, I would have been in the driver’s seat already with her on my lap.

  Christ. I was as hard as kryptonite. She was my kryptonite.

  “What do you want, Chance?”

  You.

  “What. Is. Saturday?”

  “I’m not answering that.” Her palm came up onto my chest—an ill-fated attempt to push me away as her fingers curled into my shirt instead.

  “Tell me,” I demanded, my lips playing with the skin of her cheek. “Tell me, J-bird. Or kiss me.”

  She sucked in air and I held my breath as the movement brushed her tits against me. Don’t. If I fucking thought about them now, I would lose it.

  It was an easy decision. She would give me an answer—kissing me was far too great of a risk for her; she would never give me that. Not yet, at least.

  First, I expected her to refuse to make the choice.

  Then, I expected that she would just eventually tell me what Saturday was—so that I could tell her there was no way she was going on a date with that asswipe.

  I never expected the words that I heard next.

  “Then kiss me, Chance. Kiss me and get out of my life.”

  My fingers gripped her chin, tilting her head up to mine. Our gazes locked—fire and ice. I wasn’t sure if I’d heard her or just what I wanted to hear, but I wasn’t waiting to find out that I’d heard wrong.

  My lips crushed hers.

  I devoured her mouth—starved of her for eight years. And she responded like a fucking avalanche, sweeping me under and consuming me. She could turn and walk away when this was done, but here. Now. She was just as on fucking fire as I was.

  Oxygen deprived for years, tasting her was the first breath of that cool, crisp fall air. The kind that you breathe in and you feel every particle diffuse down your throat and into the follicles of your lungs. That was Jessa. The fucking free-radicle.

  Her nails scored my scalp as I pushed flush against her, sandwiching her against the side of her car. She was softer than I remembered. Warmer. Even more intoxicating than when we’d been seventeen.

  There was no space between us, from lips to legs. Where it counted though, there were light years keeping us apart.

  My hands angled her head, holding her hostage for my tongue to claim every inch of the sweetness of her mouth. It was the only part of her I was getting right now and I’d be damned if I missed any fucking spot.

  The whole world was created and destroyed in that kiss.

  She moaned against me and I ground my hips into her, my cock aching for the only woman who would be able to satisfy me—the one woman I’d sworn to break.

  So break her.

  Before she breaks you.

  My lips broke from hers, both of us gasping for air.

  “You want me to fuck you…” I rasped, biting her lower lip and pulling it with my teeth. She shuddered as I sucked on it—just like she always had.

  She turned her head away, wincing as her lip pinched pulling it from my grasp.

  “No.”

  “It wasn’t a question, J-bird.” And even if it was, I knew her answer was a lie. The way she moved against me told me that a few more minutes would have had some part of me inside of her. “Your body says otherwise; your body screams otherwise.” My lips moved against her cheek as she fought to disagree with me. “I bet you’re drenched, Jessa.” I groaned. “Let me find out.”

  She whimpered and then her hands on my chest did the job they were supposed to and pushed me away.

  I smirked. “You know this… us… is going to happen.”

  Especially now.

  Not just for revenge, but because at some point she would give up on me if I didn’t have her again.

  “No. Us already happened and this is never happening again. Have a good weekend, Pride.” Her truck door slamming highlighted just how far I’d fallen.

  I watched her drive away. Too proud to let her see that that kiss had made me too weak to move. Too proud to admit that I had feelings for her that ran far deeper than vengeance. Too proud to admit that, in the end, the only person destroyed by my scheme would be myself.

  I was too proud for it all

  But, then again, it was my fucking name.

  My foot pressed heavy on the gas, trying to match the speed of my racing heart.

  What had I just done?

  Just when I thought I was free from the past… Just when I was convinced that the door to what we had together was locked… I realized that I wasn’t the only one with a key.

  “So, wait… Who is this guy again, Jess?” Ally asked as soon as she got into the car. Tammy and I picked her up at her house. I was relieved when she came out wearing jeans, a tee, and winter fur boots; I’d specifically told her nothing fancy tonight because I didn’t have the wherewithal to put myself together like that.

  Instead, I’d opted for a giant sweater dress—not the tight, sexy kind that Ally would wear. It was off-the-shoulder so that did give it some sort of sexiness and I’d paired it with over-the-knee purple suede boots—because they were flat and they kept my legs warm. I looked nice enough, but not too nice that it would encourage Kyle.

  “One of my co-workers—Kyle. He’s another Physical Therapist at the center. He’s been like my mentor kinda-sorta,” I explained again, adding, “He’s really nice. I felt bad saying no. Plus… I think I needed to get out.”

  “Gotcha.” I glanced back to see Ally attempting to finish putting on her mascara in the car.

  “What were you doing at your house? I thought you were basically living at Emmett’s?” I asked.

  I itched to tell them both about what had happened between Chance and me yesterday. At the same time, I still had no idea what it meant to me. A day later and I couldn’t tell if I was angry, regretful, anxious, or just plain turned-on.

  The second his lips touched mine had been just like that night on the mountain—the first time he kissed me. And every time after that. There was only us and the world that our desire created. That was why I’d given up on underwear. It never mattered where we were—when we wanted to be together, it was happening.

  “Well…” Ally sighed. I heard her wrestling with her make-up bag, trying to fit it back into her purse. “I had to finish packing up stuff… to move to Emmett’s.”

  “What!” Tammy and I both exclaimed. Not like she wasn’t basically living there already.

  “Yeah, I’m officially mov
ing in.” The most giant, sparkling smile reflected in my rearview mirror. “Emmett had to go into Denver today to deliver some boards, so I figured I would take the day to pack up everything that I have in the house. I was about to text you guys, but then Jessa you mentioned about tonight, so I thought I’d just tell you in person.”

  “Congratulations, Al!” I squealed from the front seat as Tammy clapped her hands together. Her face was lit up for the first time in days. In spite of that, the weight of what she was fighting loomed hauntingly behind her hazel eyes.

  “Thank you, guys! I know it sounds stupid, but I’ve never felt so happy waking up every morning with this future to look forward to,” Ally gushed from the back.

  I knew Tammy and I felt the same thing—overwhelming happiness for our best friend and guilt for the gnawing sadness of our past demons that still haunted us.

  “Al, after everything that you’ve been though with losing Dylan and moving here, you deserve it,” I said, my voice soft and heavy with the joy in my heart.

  I turned onto Peak Drive where the Pub was located. It had started to snow. The trees were still covered from the storm we’d gotten over the weekend, but this was creating a light dusting on the road and making it just a tad slippery. Good thing I had my truck.

  “Thanks, J.” She sounded so at peace. I was jealous. No point in denying it. “Tammy, how are you feeling? You haven’t told us much lately. What’s going on with all the tests? Do they know what’s wrong yet?”

  Tammy shuddered in the passenger seat next to me. I had a feeling that they didn’t know yet and it was killing her inside. People like Tammy needed all of the details and facts ASAP. Unknowns stressed her. And this—this was more than an unknown; what if the doctors couldn’t figure out what was wrong?

  “I don’t mean to butt in,” I began, recognizing that this was the last thing that Tammy wanted to talk about right now. She was trying so hard to be happy and have one night where she had sufficient distraction from her health… and having to answer this question could ruin it, “but I have to tell you guys something.”