“I know,” he said with a grin.
Heat pooled in my stomach and then in my cheeks before he chuckled and stepped back to adjust himself in his pants.
“Can’t say I don’t love the way you think, J-bird, but that I’ll be having later,” he assured me as he strolled over to the cabinet next to the stove and began to pull out a fry pan and griddle. “I stopped at the store on my way back from Frost’s last night to grab food. Figured we’d be snowed in which means that today, I’m cooking for you.”
My mouth fell open and I quickly brought the can of water to my lips, murmuring, “You can cook?”
“Oh, baby, can I cook.” He winked at me. “Between Channing and me, one of us had to get the cooking gene and it definitely wasn’t her.” I had to agree with him there; his twin was notoriously terrible in the kitchen. “Frittatas and chocolate chip pancakes comin’ right up.”
My stomach growled its approval as I planted my elbows on the counter. Oh, I was going to watch this. I didn’t know if there was a sexier sight than this half-naked man standing over the stove as he made me food.
If I hadn’t come to terms that I loved him before, this moment would have sealed the deal.
“Well, looks like there will be tons of great powder for us tomorrow,” I mused lightly, watching the snow continue to pile up outside the window.
Chance nodded, pulling out a bunch of vegetables from the fridge that I somehow completely overlooked.
“Do you want me to help you cut those up?”
One eyebrow raised up at me. “I dunno, J-bird. The last time the two of us were in this kitchen together, you tried to club me with a rolling pin. I’m thinking I should probably not give you a sharp instrument this time.”
I rolled my eyes and laughed even as he pulled the knife out and moved the cutting board to the side of the island so that I could chop up the red pepper and onion.
We fell into easy conversation from there, the past weaving into the present and secured with smiles and laughs as though this had been us for the past eight years—waking up and making breakfast together.
“I think those are good, babe,” he said with a low voice, kissing the crook of my neck as he reached around and pulled the cutting board away from me. “Thank you.”
My whole body warmed at his words.
This might not have been our past eight years, I thought as I swallowed over the thick lump in my throat, but I would do whatever it took to make sure that it would be our future for the next eight years and the forever that followed.
Drying off my hands, I was about to offer to help him mix the pancake batter when my phone began to vibrate against the counter.
‘The Emperor’ read across the screen.
If it was anyone else I would have ignored it, but I hated declining when one of my brothers called. I didn’t get to talk to them too much but we always tried to touch base at least once a week since I moved back here.
Chance looked over his shoulder at me as I picked up.
“Hello?”
Miles’ voice boomed from the other end of the line, “Baby J!”
I bit my lip and grinned at the stupid nickname they called me; I wasn’t a baby.
“Hey. What’s going on?”
“Just on the way back from a job,” he said with a Southern twang that I’d lost most of during high school and hadn’t quite recovered when I was back down there for college. “How’s everything goin’ up in Winter Wonderland? I heard y’all are in for a pretty big dump this weekend.”
“Oh yeah.” My eyes flicked to the white outside the window. “It’s been coming down all night with no end in sight.”
He sucked in a loud breath. “Makes you wish you stayed in Texas with your favorite brother.”
“Not quite, but I do miss you,” I replied with a laugh, catching Chance’s penetrating stare and his lips that mouthed ‘who is it?’ briefly before I turned away from him. I couldn’t look at him and focus on this conversation at the same time.
“It’ll be good for the mountain tomorrow,” I consoled Miles, not that he knew how good it was going to be. My brothers were warm-weather kind of guys, especially because of their work. “So, you just finished a job? How’s work been going? You said Evans was giving you shit last time we talked.”
Dom Evans was the owner of the construction company that my brothers worked for. Despite the fact that they were probably the best and the most meticulous out of everyone, their boss still treated them like crap.
“Ahh… yeah… ‘bout that…” he began ruefully and I knew that he and Mick had done something—not stupid, because they weren’t reckless, but they’d done something.
“What did you do?” I demanded, twirling the edge of my tank in my fingers, feeling Chance’s glare still on me.
“Well, Baby J, Mick and I may have quit Evans Construction last week.”
“What?” I screeched.
They’d been working there for three long years now but agreed that they wanted at least five before they left and looked for another job. They wanted to hone their craft and they didn’t want to look like flighty millennials for leaving even though Evans was a dick and, among other things, rarely ever paid them on time or for extra time that was spent on a project.
“Well, we told him we were quitting. Gave two weeks. Fucker said he didn’t want them and told us to get out, so yep, that’s how that rodeo went down.”
I groaned. “And you’re just telling me now? What the hell, Miles! So, where are you working?”
“Well, you were busy with the new job and all and we didn’t know what we were doin’ quite yet. Today though, we just finished up our last job for Evans.”
“But… he told you to leave. Is he even going to pay you for it?” I blurted out.
“Probably not,” Miles laughed ironically. “But it was adding a laundry room onto this old lady’s house and I knew that Evans would have her waiting another month and a half before sending a different team out to finish it, so Mick and I just did it; she had hip surgery. It was going to be a real problem if she kept having to go out into the separate garage to get it done. It was the right thing to do. Plus, she baked us fresh coffeecake so I can’t complain.”
The sudden urge to cry pricked at the back of my eyes; we were all raised that way—to do the right thing—but that didn’t mean I wasn’t affected by how beyond decent my brothers were especially when the credit for the work went to someone who treated them like crap.
“So, what are you going to do?”
“Well, that’s the other thing I really called to tell ya, Baby J,” he drawled slowly. My hand planted on my hip and I bit my tongue waiting for the other shoe to drop. “Mick and I are movin’ to California.”
My mouth moved for a good few seconds before any sound came out.
“What?” I wasn’t sure I’d heard him right. My brothers were Texas boys through and through—and now they were moving to California? “Why? How? You need to start explaining right now, Miles Madison.”
This time when I caught Chance’s bright sapphire stare, it was slightly calmer realizing that I was talking to my brother.
“Mick and I decided that we are going to start our own construction company and we need to do it on our own terms, in a new place.” He sounded like there were more factors going into that decision but before I could ask, he continued, “So, we’ve been looking around, upgraded the truck, and finally decided on Carmel Cove in California. It’ll be cooler since it’s up north, but it looks pretty nice and lots of great new construction goin’ on. It’s gonna be good, Baby J. We’re gonna be good.”
I knew he was trying to reassure me, but I hardly heard much after he said they were moving to Carmel Cove. Immediately, my eyes had flicked to Chance, remembering that name from the night he’d told me about the time he spent in California.
“Carmel Cove?” I repeated again in somewhat of a trance, watching Chance look up at me. “I know someone who was just there.”
“Oh, yeah? Who?”
I blinked, turning away from the kitchen and realizing what I’d said. I quickly stammered, “No one. Never mind.”
My brothers didn’t know the whole story about Chance. They knew I’d left someone when I left Colorado and heartbreak is a hard thing to hide. I didn’t tell them it was my fault, I didn’t tell them about the baby. Naturally, they assumed everything was Chance’s fault and I just let it go because never in a million years did I think I would end up back with him.
“Ok…” Miles’ voice trailed off, teetering on the edge of demanding I explain. “So, what’s new with you? Is Tammy still surviving your tornado-like living habits?”
“Breakfast, Jess,” Chance said behind me and I jumped.
He’d set our plates on the table, the steam still rising from the egg frittatas and the chocolate melting from the chips in the pancakes.
“Who was that?” Miles demanded, the edge that had been on the horizon of his tone now front and center.
“Umm… Well, Miles,” I said weakly, “I guess I have a few things to tell you—“
“Jessalynn,” he growled into the other end of the phone and I winced. Whenever I was in trouble, I went from ‘Baby J’ to the serious merging of my first and middle names.
“Trying to tell you, Miles,” I said firmly, “that I moved out of Tammy’s place a few weeks ago. Ally offered me to stay in her house which I accepted. Long story short,” really long story, “Chance is living here now, too. I mean, not just living. We’re kind of…”
My mouth went completely dry. What did I say? That we were dating again? That we were back together? That I loved him all along?
“Are you fucking kidding me?” Miles roared and I winced, pulling the phone back from my ear so he didn’t blow out an ear drum, and allowing Chance to hear what was going on.
“Give me the phone,” Chance demanded, stalking towards me with his hand out.
“No, it’s fine. I can handle it.” My hand covered the bottom of the phone as I replied to Chance.
“Not a question, J-bird,” he said firmly, prying the phone from my fingers and holding it up to his face even as it vibrated with the intensity of Miles’ questions coming from the other end of the line.
I knew about her brothers even though I’d never met them. And judging from the anxious expression on her face, they knew about me—and not good things either.
When we broke up, I’d been angry. I’d felt betrayed. But I’d kept to myself because talking about Jessa, even in the worst ways, reminded me just how much I felt for her.
Knowing the truth about that night, I could imagine what it was like for her when she moved to Texas—and it was nothing like the story I told myself before where she was happily screwing whoever the hell she wanted. No, she’d moved to Texas heartbroken for what she felt like she had to do. And Jessa wasn’t like me; she wouldn’t push her family away—especially decent guys like her brothers.
That’s why I took the phone. She wasn’t the only one responsible for what happened in high school and it was my intentions that needed to be made clear—not just to him, but to her.
Tapping the speaker button, I held her eyes as I continued this conversation with her able to hear every word.
“Miles,” I said tightly, “it’s Chance.”
There was a beat of silence but I could hear his bear-like breaths on the other end.
“What are you doing with my sister?” he growled.
“I’m winning her back.”
“What the hell does that mean?”
“It means that I fucked up a long time ago and I’m determined to make things right. I’m determined to give her what she deserves because she’s everything to me,” I replied hoarsely because there was no sense in beating around the bush. I watched as Jessa’s hand reached up to cover her mouth. “So, I think what she’s trying to tell you is that we’re back together and we’re living together. You good with that?”
“Not particularly.” He cleared his throat. “But if it’s what she wants…”
“I’m hoping it is but you’ll have to ask her.” My eyes held her hostage. I watched the steady, rapid beat of her heart make the skin of her neck pulse.
“Don’t hurt her, Ryder,” he threatened with a low voice. He didn’t have to add what would happen if I did; I knew and I was ok with it. “Put Jessa back on the phone.”
I saw the heavy emotion pooling in her eyes as she bit down on her lower lip. I wanted to kiss her just as much as she wanted to kiss me but not right now.
“Miles?” I choked out, holding the phone back to my face after I’d turned the speaker off.
“Can’t say I’m happy about it Baby J,” he said hoarsely. “Know what you were like when you came back home. Don’t want to see you heartbroken again.”
“I know, Miles, but I’m ok.” I hoped he could hear the reassuring smile that crept onto my lips as I spoke.
“So, you want this? You want him?”
My smile grew.
“Yeah, I do.”
“Because you love him?”
Here, I faltered. I’d only just admitted it to myself this morning and now my brother was demanding the truth: I did love him.
“How did you know?” I asked with a soft voice.
He sighed with the kind of weight that is only carried with experience.
“Only the things you love can break your heart, Baby J, but when you trust it back to the one who broke it, well, you’re either a fool or it’s meant to be. I’ve been the fool, Baby J… but you’re no fool,” he replied roughly and my heart squeezed both at what this meant for me but also because of what it told me about him. “Still don’t like it all too much, but can’t say that wouldn’t be the case for any guy. As long as you’re happy, Baby J.”
A small watery laugh bubbled from my lips. “I am.”
“Alright. Good.” I heard the beeping of his truck as he turned it off. “Well, I just got home. Gonna run some errands and start looking for a place to stay. Trying to get out of here by the end of the month since our lease is up anyway.”
“Ok. Good luck with everything. I’ll talk to you soon.”
“Love you, Baby J. You know we’re always here if you need anything.”
“I know, Miles. Thanks. Love you.”
I ended the call and let my phone drop onto the table, overwhelmed with the brief conversation with my brother.
She’s everything to me.
My heart skipped again as I replayed the words.
“You alright, J-bird?” Chance asked.
“Perfect,” I said, stepping into his waiting arms.
With a growl he kissed my forehead and murmured, “Really want to kiss you, babe, but if I do that, I won’t be able to stop. And I made you breakfast and I’m determined for you to eat it while it’s hot.”
I laughed, wrapping my arms around his waist and letting the tension of the moment slowly diffuse away. My stomach growled again in agreement with him.
“You didn’t have to do that,” I said as I pulled back.
He brushed a strand of pink out of my face and tucked it behind my ear. “Yeah, I did, J-bird.” He pulled out my chair for me. “You’re mine. And it’s about time I made it clear that I have no intention of letting you go.”
I couldn’t stop myself from rising up to kiss him hard on the lips before quickly dropping into my seat before it could lead to more.
“Playing with fire,” he growled as he took a seat next to me.
Shooting him a grin, I loaded up a forkful of eggs. “Not yet, but later I’ll take my Chance,” I teased with a wink as we both dove into our food.
Breakfast was delicious.
Not as delicious as the sight of him making it for me—or cleaning up after it. And definitely not as delicious as hearing him call me his. Again.
Miles was right, I mused as I waited for Chance to finish at the sink
and make his way back over to the couch and to me; whatever happened and come what may, what we had was meant to be.
THE CRUNCH OF THE SNOW underneath my snowboard boots was like a mallet coming down in a courtroom, signaling my sentence. My entire body was tight with anger, anticipation, and dread—all feelings that I’d never experienced on the mountain before.
It was still snowing, albeit much more lightly than it had overnight. The estimate was somewhere in the range of four to six inches of fresh powder that now coated the trails of Snowmass. The peaks that loomed in front of me taunted me, dared me to conquer them knowing full-well that I couldn’t.
What the fuck was I doing here?
“You ready?” My head flicked to the side to see Jessa approaching—white snowpants with a bright purple jacket, her pink hair braided down her one shoulder, and a matching pink and purple tie-dye scarf and hat. She looked like a goddamn mountain pixie with all her bright colors and mischievous smile.
Fucking magic. That was why I was here.
“Do I have a choice?” I grumbled. I held my free hand out in front of me, the other still holding my board, after that the world might implode underneath me once I strapped it to my feet.
“You always have a choice,” she retorted.
My jaw ticked. “You sure you’re allowed to be taking me here? Instead of keeping me at the gym.”
I heard the rub of her sleeves against the body of her jacket more than I saw her shrug.
“It’s your last appointment and you’ve done excellently.” Professional Jessa took over in her tone. This wasn’t flattery. This wasn’t her being nice because she wanted my dick inside of her later. This was her telling me the perfect truth; I was healing. “I submitted all of my notes this morning to Dr. Lev, telling him that I think you’ve progressed beyond what we were hoping for and that if you want to move forward with another restorative surgery, that is up to you.”
“That’s it? I’m done?” I asked and then followed with a smirk, “You think you’ve fixed me?”
The Winter Games Page 101