Jon's Spooky Corpse Conundrum

by A J Sherwood

  “We know where Roy, Sho’s ex, is.”

  “Shit.” I could hear him lurch out of a chair and gather up keys. “Where?”

  “Mt. Juliet. The Cheddar’s on the main road.”

  “Are you telling me that he’s violating his restraining order right now?”

  “A-yup,” Garrett said, popping the p.

  “Does the man have shit for brains?”

  “Apparently.”

  “I know this is a stupid question, but I’m required to ask it anyway. You’re on your way to get him right now, aren’t you?”

  “Garrett’s with me.”

  “I figured. I’ll be there in fifteen. Don’t kill him before I can get cuffs on him, that’s all I’m asking.”

  See? Borrowman was the right man to call. “We’ll try not to.”

  “I don’t want a mediocre try on this, okay? Think Yoda. Do not try, do.”

  “Meet you there.” I hung up and focused on the road. We were almost there, and the traffic required my attention.

  It took another five minutes to find a parking space, and we hopped out quickly. I felt the weight of the cuffs on my belt, the gun tucked up under my arm beneath the leather jacket I wore. Part of me wanted violence, because I was more than ticked off at this guy for causing Sho so much fear and grief. But I was aware we were in a family restaurant that had a decent amount of patrons for Halloween night. I didn’t want innocents to get hurt too.

  We strode through the main doors, flashing credentials at the waitress. It wasn’t a badge—consultants didn’t have those—but we had a license ID that told people we had the authority to make arrests.

  I knew what Roy looked like. We had a photo of him on our phones. Still, seeing him in real life, sitting in a corner booth, was different. He was lanky. I hadn’t expected that. He looked tense, shredding a napkin in between his fingers, a frown marring his face. He might have been decent-looking, sort of handsome, but it was hard to see him that way after knowing what he was capable of.

  He looked up, deep-set eyes sharp on us as we stopped at his table.

  “Roy Durham,” I kept my voice level with effort. “You’re under arrest for violating your restraining order. Please stand up and put both hands on the table.”

  He stared up at us, dark brows drawing together in an angry frown. “You don’t get to tell me to stay away from my boyfriend.”

  Garrett put a mock-friendly hand on his shoulder. “I really do when he’s not, in fact, yours. Now, you can stand, or I can start breaking bones. I’d prefer you didn’t stand.”

  Something in Garrett’s face, or tone, or body language promised pain. Roy wasn’t stupid enough to ignore his survival instincts. He slowly stood, although he demanded as he did so, “You’re him, aren’t you? I keep seeing him with a blond.”

  “That’s me,” Garrett confirmed cheerfully. “Hands on the table.”

  Roy’s mouth lifted in a sneer. “Even when he was in Sevierville, he was with you. You’re pathetic, following him around like that. You won’t get his ass by trailing after him like a whipped puppy.”

  Several facts slotted into place when he said that. Those strange incidents, where I was sure I’d seen a figure in the woods—I actually had. It wasn’t my hyperactive imagination playing tricks on me. It’d been Roy, stalking Sho. And Sho had been right as well, when he thought he saw a glimpse of Roy outside the house. Dammit. I should have listened to my instincts and double-checked the perimeter. I’d just been loath to leave everyone else alone to do it, it hadn’t seemed like a good idea.

  Garrett and I shared an unhappy glance. We’d definitely add that to the report.

  “Hands on the table,” Garrett repeated, tone hardening.

  I saw it, the moment when Roy’s stubbornness kicked in. He stopped cooperating. “You know what? No. I’m not going with you.”

  Garrett beamed at him. “I was hoping so hard you’d say that.”

  In a second flat, Garrett’s fist lashed out and hit Roy straight in the nose. He howled with pain as he stumbled backwards, cradling his broken face as blood dripped out of it.

  I shook my head—I so saw that coming—and grabbed the man’s arms, slapping cuffs on each wrist. “You really should have just cooperated. You’re already in a lot of trouble.”

  Tears of pain streamed out of Roy’s eyes, adding to the general mess of blood staining his grey shirt. Still, he glared at Garrett. “Let me guess. You’re fucking him.”

  “Wow. I can see why he ditched you in a hurry.” Garrett shook his head and asked the stunned people watching us in a rhetorical fashion, “Whatever happened to good old-fashioned romance? I mean, really. Is it so weird that I want to take the time to get to know a guy before we go to that level?”

  An elderly lady cleared her throat and gave him a game nod. “I’ve said the same thing about this generation. You take that nasty man out of here, young man.”

  “With pleasure.” Garrett grabbed him by both arms and frog-marched him out.

  I strolled along behind him, perfectly satisfied, despite not getting a hit in. Good deeds, and all that.

  Borrowman screeched up, lights whirling, not a minute after we stepped outside. He came toward us with a resigned expression, eyes sweeping over the bloody man in our custody. Heaving out a long-suffering sigh, he jerked a thumb toward the black SUV. “Load him in. I suppose you two couldn’t help yourselves.”

  I protested my innocence with spread hands. I hadn’t done anything. Yet.

  Garrett also scoffed indignantly. “He was resisting arrest.”

  “Uh-huh. Suuure he was. Load him in, Wilson. I’ll read his rights to him on the way in. And yes, you’ll have to meet us there to give a statement.”

  I figured that. As I climbed back into the truck, I called Carol. “Got him.”

  “Good! Did he resist?”

  “He did. Made Garrett’s day.”

  “Excellent. You on your way into the station?”

  “Yeah. But you’re done. Thanks, Carol.”

  “You know I did this for Sho. I’ll see you guys tomorrow.”

  We got to the station and gave our statements. It was a little hectic today, for some reason. Halloween did that to a precinct. A lot of people had started partying early, as we had more than a few costumes in the bullpen, some of them creepier than others. People were paraded from one place to another with cuffs on their wrists or handkerchiefs to their eyes. I tuned it out, more or less used to it, and focused on getting done. I wanted to pick Jon and Lauren up for dinner, then spend some time relaxing and enjoying family. We’d all earned the break.

  As I put my signature to the typed statement, I heard a voice call to me over the din.

  “Donovan.”

  My head snapped up and around, body twisting in the chair, surprised to see Sho walking toward me. How was he here? Sho didn’t really come into the station often—he worked remote most of the time. Had something happened? “Sho. What are you doing here?”

  “Carol called me.” Strong emotion moved across his face, and his eyes were a touch bright. He reached out with both arms, hugging me tightly around the shoulders. Against the top of my head, he whispered hoarsely, “Thank you.”

  Mouth lifting in a smile, I hugged him back, rubbing a hand up and down his spine for a second. He seriously looked overwhelmed. Relief would do that to a man. “You’re welcome. I wasn’t alone in this, though.”

  “I know. Where is he?” Sho drew back, already looking for him.

  Past his shoulder, I spotted Garrett coming toward us, weaving his way around the desks. “Behind you.”

  Sho turned, finding him instantly. I knew that half-smile on Garrett’s face well. He wasn’t expecting anything. He hadn’t done this to earn Sho’s good favor. He’d done it to protect a friend, and he’d do it again for exactly the same reason. It’s what made Garrett, Garrett.

  “We owe Carol and Borrowman dinner,” Garrett said, coming toward Sho. “Couldn’t have found the bastard
without them.”

  Sho didn’t respond. He grabbed Garrett with both hands cupping his face and yanked him in, mouth fastening onto the other man’s in a kiss so hot I saw the steam rising off them ten feet away. Garrett was startled for a split second then dove in enthusiastically, both arms wrapped around Sho in a way that made it clear he’d never, ever let go.

  More than a few people nearby cat-called, whistled, or ordered them to get a damn room. Me? I took a picture because Jon was going to be sorry he’d missed this. Then I sat back and just beamed at them.

  ‘Ito ang aking harana,’ Garrett had said. Loosely translated, it meant, ‘This is my love song to serenade him.’ He’d been half-joking when he’d said it, but it turned out to be prophetic. Whatever had held Sho back before was obviously gone now. Even with a whole precinct trying to intrude, Sho was perfectly content to ignore them and keep kissing Garrett.

  My phone rang and I answered it without looking away. “Hey, babe.”

  “Hey. You done with your good deed yet?”

  “Yup.”

  “How did that go?”

  “Well, you could say this mission achieved optimum results. I’ll show you the picture when I get home.”

  He could hear it in my voice, the smugness. “This is going to be good, I can tell. Alright, get home. I want the story. Bring Garrett. I made enough pizza to feed you two bottomless pits.”

  “Garrett’s going to be a little busy tonight.”

  There was a weighty pause. “Oh?”

  “Tell you when I get home.”

  “This is going to be really, really good.”

  I smiled, remembering the way my friends had lit up with pure joy. “Yes,” I said. “It certainly is.”

  Books by AJ Sherwood

  Legends of Lobe Den Herren

  The Warden and the General

  Fourth Point of Contact

  Jon’s Mysteries

  Jon’s Downright Ridiculous Shooting Case

  Jon’s Crazy Head-Boppin’ Mystery

  Jon’s Spooky Corpse Conundrum

  Author

  Dear Reader,

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  AJ’s mind is the sort that refuses to let her write one project at a time. Or even just one book a year. She normally writes fantasy under a different pen name, but her aforementioned mind couldn’t help but want to write for the LGBTQ+ genre. Fortunately, her editor is completely on board with this plan.

  In her spare time, AJ loves to devour books, eat way too much chocolate, and take regular trips. She's only been outside of the United States once, to Japan, and loved the experience so much that she firmly intends to see more of the world as soon as possible. Until then, she'll just research via Google Earth and write about the worlds in her own head.

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