Directing You

by Katana Collins

  “Well,” Reid said, handing me the steaming mug of tea. “You should probably get used it. Especially if you’re going to be a star.”

  My brows knit deeper. “Who said I wanted to be a star?”

  He shrugged. “No one said it. But you will be. You’re too damn talented not to be.”

  I resisted the urge to roll my eyes at him. “You’re just saying that because you’re my director.”

  He shook his head slowly. “No. It’s because you’re so talented that I’m your director. Because I don’t cast people who don’t deserve it.” He took another step forward, closing what little space was left between us, and hooked a finger under my chin, bringing eyes to meet his. “Remember that. No matter what anyone says or if they find out about us, you are talented and deserving of this role.”

  The knot in my throat plummeted to my belly as the words one weekend only rang in my ears.

  Chapter 13

  Reid

  At five o’clock sharp, Hazel and I were sliding into the back seat of my limo. Unlike most women, she didn’t squeal or even light up when she saw the limo service outside. She merely arched her dark eyebrow in my direction. “Where the hell are we going that we need a limo?”

  I took her hand in mine, gently bringing her knuckles to my lips. “Well, since we don’t want to be seen by anyone, walking to a restaurant around here is out of the question. The limo will take us to your surprise, and since the windows are tinted, once we’re inside, we don’t have to worry about anyone seeing us on the trip, either. And third… being in the back of a limo means we can have some champagne on the way.” I popped the cork on the champagne and poured us each a glass, remembering fondly the first time we’d shared a bottle of prosecco together at Hazel’s club.

  “Huh,” she said. “Guess you’ve thought of everything.”

  Oh, she had no idea. Last night when I couldn’t sleep and I laid in Hazel’s bed staring at her, I came up with this plan. This idea of a perfect date night away from prying eyes. Other than the walk from Hazel’s apartment to the limo and back again, the risk of being seen was extremely low.

  “And… where exactly are we going?” she asked as I handed her the glass of champagne.

  I grinned wider, tapping the edge of my glass to hers. “Settle in. It’s a bit of a drive.”

  Those dark brows tilted even more, assessing me. “How long of a drive?”

  I shrugged casually, sipping my champagne. “Two hours.”

  “Two hours? You’re taking me two hours outside of the city? For dinner?”

  “Why else do you think we were leaving at five o’clock for dinner?”

  She shrugged, a playful smile curving her lips. “I don’t know. I thought you were maybe the early bird special type.”

  My jaw dropped, pretending to be indignant. “Did you just call me old, Moon?”

  She kept that calm demeanor as she sipped her champagne, looking at me with those fuck me eyes over the edge of her glass. “If the penny loafer fits.”

  “Oh, you’re going to get it…” I lunged toward her, digging my fingers into her ribcage, tickling her. She shrieked a laugh, a bit of the champagne sloshing out and spilling on my pants as she wriggled around in my arms.

  “No! Reid, no! I’m going to spill champagne everywhere!” Her fits of giggles were barely broken up by her pleas for me to stop.

  “Say I’m not that old! Say it!” I demanded, continuing to tickle her.

  “Okay, okay!”

  I stopped tickling her, but didn’t remove my hands from her body. It felt too good, too raw having her there in my arms and instead I slid my palms to her back. “Okay, what?” I whispered, my eyes drifting down to her chest as it heaved up and down with each labored breath she took.

  Her finger slid against my jaw, long fingernail scraping against the stubble there, and she pulled my gaze back to hers, a small smirk tilting her mauve lips. “My eyes are up here.” She set the champagne down and pushed me back in the limo seat, straddling me, then pressing her lips to mine.

  I kept my eyes open through that kiss that tasted tart—bubbly from the champagne. Kept my eyes open, afraid to close them even for a moment out of fear that this could all be a dream.

  I drank her in, diving my tongue into her mouth. She ended the kiss far too soon for my liking, nibbling her way up my jaw to my ear. “You’re a dirty, old man.”

  Oh, you have no idea. I slid my hands up her body, the silk dress bunching beneath my palms. My cock pressed against my pants and as she reached down and undid my zipper, I barely heard it as she moaned. Unlike this morning, it was quiet, like she was trying to restrain herself.

  I, on the other hand, groaned loudly and cursed while checking to make sure the privacy partition was up in the limo (it was). Her dress had already naturally shifted to her upper thighs with the way she was straddling me, and with a quick nudge of my fingers, I had it bunched around her waist. My thumbs stroked her hipbones, hooking under the small string of her thong.

  She wrapped her manicured fingers around my hard length and I grunted in response—a caveman sound that I wasn’t proud of, but also had no control over. With a few quick motions, she had the condom in my pocket torn open and sheathed my erection. Then slowly, with that sexy lace thong pushed to the side, she lowered herself onto me—deep and wet and hot. My head fell back against the seat, and with heavy eyelids, I watched as she rode me, undulating her sexy body in small pulses, finding the right spot, and right when she did, she threw her head back and moaned… this time completely unrestrained.

  I couldn’t take my eyes off of her—she was mesmerizing in every sense of the word. Everything from her soft curves, to the delicate angle of her shoulders and collarbone, the gentle dip of her neck. My thumb circled her clit, and I watched as her thigh muscles knotted and bunched with every slow thrust up and down over my cock. Her soft lips parted as she took in shallow breaths, causing her lush breasts to bounce within the confines of her dress.

  Leaning forward, I took her pebbled nipple into my mouth over the fabric of her dress and nibbled the silk covered pearl nub between my teeth. And holy fuck, she felt so good, her slick heat wrapped around me, sliding me in and out—I wasn’t even sure how I was still breathing. But if I was going to drown, I could think of no better way than drowning in Hazel.

  I moved my hands to cup her ass, guiding her over me—faster, harder. She cupped my jaw, dragging my lips to meet hers, and I felt the sharp intake of her breath as I drove deeper inside of her. Her whimper vibrated against my mouth as she spread her thighs wider, taking me deeper even though I didn’t think it was possible.

  I felt it the moment she spiraled. The spasms from deep within her squeezing me, milking me. And with that release, I let go and fell with her. The air punched from my lungs as a pleasure unlike anything I’d ever felt rocked through my body. I spurted inside of her, biting her shoulder and catching the back of her head as she threw it back in ecstasy. Light—golden, reflective and so fucking hot—seemed to replace the blood coursing through my veins as a strangled noise tore from my throat.

  In my arms, she went quiet as our heaving breath returned to normal, and I pressed a kiss to her jaw. Those fucking astral eyes returned to mine, holding my gaze. “Reid,” she whispered.

  I threaded my fingers into her hair, brushing it back from her face and dropped my damp forehead to hers. “What is it?” I barely got the question out before she was kissing me once again. But in that kiss was something more—this was more than one weekend. This was more than a hook up. I felt it in her gaze… in that kiss. I wasn’t sure if Hazel Moon was willing to give me more, but God did I want it.

  I wanted all of her.

  “I’m not ready for this to be over yet,” I whispered.

  She was quiet a moment before answering, “It’s only Saturday night. We have more than 24 hours left.”

  “That’s not what I meant.” Then again, I suppose her silence was my answer.

  “I
know,” she finally said, then shook her head. “Reid… I can’t fall for my professor. I just can’t.” Her voice cracked and she lowered her gaze, unwilling to look me in the eyes as she spoke.

  “I know,” I whispered, hugging her into me. “I know.” I meant that, even though the acknowledgment cracked my heart into two pieces. My sad, frail heart that I had only managed to piece back together recently was shattered all over again.

  I cleared my throat and dipped my gaze to catch hers. Those bright eyes shone with unshed tears and I forced a smile in an attempt to lighten the mood. “You ready for the best ramen in all of New York state?”

  A grin split her face even though I could see—could feel—the hints of sadness lingering beneath the surface. “You brought me to a ramen restaurant?”

  I nodded. “Rated the best in Zagat. And of course, far from the city, so virtually no risk of being spotted by anyone who might know us. Granted, I had no idea you liked Mac and Cheese so much, either. Next time we’ll—”

  She cut me off, throwing her arms around my neck and hugging me tightly. “Thank you, Reid. Thank you for paying attention to the little things.”

  But with Hazel, they weren’t little. Every detail was like a piece of a treasure map.

  I closed my eyes and inhaled deeply, committing the moment to memory. Doing inventory of the squeeze of her thighs around mine. The softness of her breasts brushing against my chest. The unnatural speed at which my heart pounded against my ribcage whenever she came near.

  I committed it to memory because come Monday, I’ll have to pretend this didn’t happen. I’ll have to pretend I didn’t just have the best weekend of my life. On Monday, I’ll pretend I don’t know what it’s like to be inside of and writhing above the most beautiful woman I’d ever seen.

  On Monday, I’ll have to pretend I’m not falling in love with Hazel Moon.

  Chapter 14

  Hazel

  The buzzing sound of Reid’s cell phone jarred me awake. I blinked, rubbing my knuckles against my eyes as they adjusted to the dark room. Through my lace curtains, I could see that the inky sky held the smallest hint of azure and gold as the sun was about to edge over the horizon.

  I glanced at my clock—five a.m. Only one more day left with Reid. As I sat up, I hugged my knees into my chest and looked down at him asleep beside me before glancing again at his vibrating phone. Who the hell kept calling him all weekend? And before dawn? It seemed… unusual.

  Jealousy reared its ugly head even though I had no claim over Reid. He wasn’t mine. He was like a book from the library—I got to have him. Enjoy him. Hold him close and engulf myself in his world, but at the end of the day, I couldn’t keep him.

  With a deep breath, he inhaled, his eyes fluttering open briefly. Had it not been for me sitting up and staring at him, he probably would have gone right back to sleep. Instead, his eyes jolted open and he sat up, startled. “Hazel?” he asked, his voice gruff from the hours of dormancy. “What’s wrong?”

  I shook my head. “Nothing. Just… watching you sleep.” I inwardly cringed at how creepy that sounded.

  “You’re watching me sleep?”

  “Yes,” I answered. “If you get to watch me closely at school—ordering tea and whatnot—then I’m going to watch you sleep.”

  His mouth twisted into a smirk. “Sounds fair to me.”

  Our eyes locked, and even in the darkness that swallowed the room, I could see the hungry glint within his stare. With everything between us—the intensity, the passion, the kindness—I still couldn’t shake the feeling that he was hiding something from me. “If I’m the other woman, I need to know now,” I blurted out. “I’m never going to be someone’s mistress ever again.”

  His brow lifted. “Again?”

  “I didn’t know I was the other woman. Not until his wife showed up while we were having dinner and threw wine in our faces. He ran out after her and stuck me with the evil glares of onlookers and a check that maxed out my credit card that month.” I pressed my lips together and twisted my hands in my lap. “I never would have dated him if I’d thought he was married.”

  “You are not the other woman. You are the only woman,” Reid said, dragging his fingertips gently down the length of my arm. Goosebumps erupted beneath his touch in a long line from my shoulder to my wrist. “And if you didn’t know he was married, then that asshole is the only one in the wrong in that situation.”

  “I know that. But it always made me wonder… how many patrons of the Ruby Slipper come in, slip their weddings bands into their pockets, and buy private dances? How many onlookers have wives at home who think they’re working late?”

  Reid nodded, but offered no other insights on the topic and his words from Friday night rang in my head. Not sure I’ll ever be engaged again… and if I do, it’d better be a long engagement. I want to know I can trust her. “Your ex-fiancé… she cheated on you?”

  With a deep exhale, Reid sat up, pulling me into his arms. “She did.”

  “My dad cheated on my mom.” God, why was I admitting so much to a man who was barely telling me two words about himself? Maybe deep down, I thought if I spilled my heart to him, he would open up to me, too. “I was in high school, ditching class with my friends and we drove out to the mall in a neighboring town. I saw him in Victoria Secret with her. Kissing. Buying her lingerie. My dad looked up and saw me through the window. He never turned me in for cutting school. And I never told Mom what I saw.”

  “They’re still married?” Reid asked, his fingers stroking my hair from scalp to tip, gently brushing the strands.

  I nodded. “I don’t think my mom ever knew… ever found out about his infidelity. I always felt like I should have told her. But I was scared and selfish. I didn’t want life to change.”

  Reid sighed and held me tighter. “I bet she knows. We almost always find out… eventually. Even before I knew, I sensed it. I could feel the shift with Fa—my fiancé. There was more distance. She spent more time on her phone texting than she did talking with me at night. She suddenly had new girlfriends that I’d never met that she was ‘hanging out’ with late into the night.”

  I hugged him back, swallowing the relieved sigh that he was sharing, too, finally. “I’m sorry.”

  His lips grazed the top of my head. “I was so broken when she left me, certain I’d never find that kind of love again. That I wasn’t made for love, or somehow, I’d deserved what she did—like I wasn’t enough for her, so therefore I’d never be enough for anyone.”

  “You’re enough for me,” I whispered. The wall of muscle holding me stiffened suddenly. Was that too much? Did I overstep?

  “It’s been a long time since I’ve been with a woman other than my ex-fiancé,” he admitted with a deep crack in his voice. He shifted his body, moving so that he was now sitting in front of me. The dark sky was lightening by the second, the navy darkness melting into a Rothko painting of oranges and blues. “Hazel.” My name on his lips was spoken with such intensity, that I sucked in a sharp breath, my heart catching a beat. “Even if we only ever have this weekend together, I need you to know that this… you… mean so much more to me than what’s physical between us. You’ve single-handedly broken down the walls I’ve spent almost two years building since my fiancé cheated on me. And for as long as I live, I will never forget that… or you.”

  He paused, his thumb moving in circles across my jaw, and I leaned into his touch, eyes fluttering closed. “Reid—”

  Gently, he pushed his finger against my lips, shushing me. “I know,” he said. “I know you can’t be with your professor and I respect that. But please know, that every time I look up at the moon, I’ll think of you.”

  He kissed me then, not letting me respond… not even letting me think about what he’d just admitted. Maybe it was better that way, I thought as we fell back in a tangle of lips and arms and legs onto the bed. Because in that moment, if he had let me speak, I would have told him I was falling for him.

  I w
ould have told him he was the one library book I was never returning.

  Chapter 15

  Hazel

  This was it… mine and Reid’s last night together. My heart squeezed at the thought of this being over. Fully and totally over. I wasn’t ready to say goodbye and yet I think we both knew this was not a sustainable relationship. Sneaking around, never leaving the apartment together was fine for a weekend… not a lifetime.

  Onions sizzled in the frying pan as I cooked one of the only fancy meals I knew how to—ground beef stuffed delicata squash.

  As the ground beef browned with the onions, I sprinkled in some garlic powder, salt, pepper, and mustard powder. Beside me, my cell phone buzzed against the formica counter top. Cris, my boss from the burlesque club, lit up the screen. Damn. There was only one reason she would be calling, and the last thing I wanted was to go in and shake my booty for a bunch of strangers.

  I swiped my thumb across my cracked phone screen—yet another thing that I hadn’t had the money to fix—and answered her call. “Hey Cris.”

  “Hazel, I know it’s your one weekend off, but is there any chance you can fill in for Kitty tonight? She called out and we are down one act for the night… she’s supposed to go on in an hour.”

  Usually, this was the point I sighed and grabbed my burlesque bag of pasties and props and costume pieces. I was always the girl who filled in. Namely because I was always the girl desperate for a paycheck. But for once, I was going to prioritize my emotional health over my financial health. For once, I was going to choose a quiet night in with a guy who liked me. Even if I could use the extra money, for my sanity, I couldn’t do it tonight. “I can’t,” I said. “I’ve got plans already.”