Retreat

by Jay Crownover

  I poured the peroxide on one of the bandages and stared at Webb before touching the cotton to his shoulder. “This is going to suck.”

  His eyes widened and his jaw clenched. “I know, but do it anyway.”

  We both held our breath as I inched the bandage toward the opening in his flesh. As soon as it touched the injury, a scream that made my ears ring echoed throughout the cabin. One of Webb’s hands shot up and wrapped around my good wrist. He squeezed so hard that I knew I was going to have a bruise there, but he didn’t pull me away as the liquid stung him and as his blood turned the white cloth red.

  I repeated the process on the back side of his shoulder and thought for a second that he had passed out from the pain. His shoulders slumped forward and his head lolled listlessly on his neck as I covered the wound in a greasy layer of antibiotic cream. When I said his name, he muttered, “It’s fine. I’m fine.” Which both sounded like a big fat lie but there wasn’t anything that could be done about it.

  I put bandages on either side of the wound and then wrapped his entire shoulder in an Ace bandage so tightly that he could hardly move it. I was just putting the metal clips at the end of the bandage when the door opened and a soggy Cy and Grady dripped their way inside. Before Cy could say anything, I ushered him to one of the folding chairs situated around the card table and treated him to the same amateur nursing Webb had received.

  Cy didn’t make a sound. I knew the peroxide and the pressure on the gash in his arm had to hurt like hell but still, the man sat like a stone and simply watched me fuss over him like it wasn’t necessary. It was totally necessary because even if it didn’t make him feel any better, taking care of him and making sure he was as comfortable as possible made me feel better. I was pretty sure he knew that taking care of him soothed something inside of me because he let me hover over him for far longer than was needed. Moments later, when he had enough and pulled me down into his lap with a sigh, he thanked me with a light kiss on the lips. He was wet and chilly but his mouth was warm. I marveled that he was able to burn even when life was throwing everything it could at him to extinguish his fire.

  “Let’s whip up something to eat and then we can dry out and rest up for a little bit. We can’t stay in one place for too long in case those tire tracks don’t belong to the rangers. We don’t want to be sitting ducks up here and the ranch is only another day’s ride, over the top of the mountain and down the other side of it. Hopefully, Sutton has already made his way back home and alerted the authorities.” He sounded tired and frustrated.

  “If the rangers use this cabin for fire lookouts, wouldn’t they have a radio or something to call back to base?” Now that he was outed as a federal agent and fully acting like his real self, Grady’s training and intuition was on full display.

  Cy nodded at the same time I shook my head no. “I tore this entire place apart looking for the first aid kit. I didn’t see anything that looked like a phone or a radio.”

  “It’s mobile so they bring it in with them, and if there was one onsite, it would be up in the tower. If it stops raining for a few minutes, I can climb up there and see if they left one behind. Doesn’t matter, though; we still can’t stay here even if the rangers are nearby. Webb needs a doctor.”

  The man on the bed lifted his good hand and let if fall weakly back to his side. “I’ll be okay. Leo did a good job wrapping me up and I think the meds are already working on the fever.”

  “Still not gonna risk it. I want everyone back at the ranch and accounted for. Besides, the sooner I get you back, the sooner you can get to Sheridan and find out if that body is someone you know or not.” Cy spoke like a man who was used to having his orders followed.

  Cy slid me off his lap and rose to his feet. I helped him pick through the canned goods I put on the center of the table when I’d searched for supplies. I told him to let me fuss with the propane-operated camp stove and getting something warmed up. I had two working hands, even if my wrist was still stiff and sore from my fall and from struggling to control the horse all afternoon. Keeping Webb propped up hadn’t done anything to make it feel better. I was playing through the pain in a very literal way and I was proud of myself. It didn’t even occur to me to run from something that actually hurt. Cy gave in without an argument and I was rewarded with another kiss.

  I made beans and canned corn for dinner. It wasn’t five-star quality but it tasted better than any fine dining dinner I could remember. By the time I cleaned everything up, Webb was passed out on the bed and Grady had gone outside to keep watch. The downpour had lightened to a drizzle, so Cy went out and climbed the tower only to report back that there was no radio. He also mentioned that he couldn’t see the cleared out portion of the forest where the grow field was located from that vantage point. That meant there was a really good chance that the rangers and wildlife officers who patrolled the area had no clue what was going on in the territory. He looked grim when he mentioned that he didn’t know if the wildlife officers would be equipped to deal with the growers if they did run across them—especially if they were backed by a cartel that had a lot of financial reason to want their operations uninterrupted.

  I silently agreed with him since none of us, including the former federal agent and the hardened ex-con, seemed to know how to deal with the bad guys in this situation either. I went to touch the backs of my fingers to Webb’s forehead and was relieved that while he was still warm, he no longer felt like the inside of a furnace. I felt Cy move behind me and reached up to cover the hand that he dropped on my shoulder with my own.

  “He’s pretty tough for a city kid. Not too many people could have made that ride through those conditions banged up the way he was.” There was begrudging admiration in his tome that he usually reserved for his brothers or for when I did something that surprised and pleased him. He squeezed my shoulder as I let out a jaw popping yawn. “As much as I hate the idea, you should climb up next to him and get some rest. You’ll sleep easier on the bed than on the floor.”

  I lifted the shoulder he was holding onto and let it fall. “I’ll sleep better wherever you’re at. If you’re staking claim on the floor, then I am too. But I think I saw a couple of old Army cots stashed in the big cabinet that the first aid kit was in. That might be better than the floor with your arm.”

  “I’m not going to shut it down, Leo. I don’t know how much faith I have in Grady to be the lookout. He’s still a stranger and that story of theirs is still crazy even if it’s true. Plus, those tire tracks make me nervous. We had to stop because of the weather, and because of Webb, but it isn’t a great idea.”

  I turned around and put my good hand on the center of his chest. His entire frame was coiled tight and vibrating with invisible waves of tension and readiness. If he wound himself up any tighter, he was going to snap and then we would all be screwed. I was adapting to what had to be done out here in the woods, but I was no adventurer, and had no clue how to navigate the unforgiving terrain back to the ranch.

  “You stayed up most of the night keeping watch. You rode for hours in the driving rain with a massive gash in your arm. You might look like you’re carved from stone but you’re made of all the same breakable things all men are made of, Cy. Take an hour and lie down with me. Hold onto me and let me hold onto you, so that I can pretend like things aren’t as bad as they actually are.” I ran my hands up over his wide shoulders and cuddled into his chest so that my cheek was resting on the steady thump of his heart. “Steal a moment for yourself. You’ve earned it.”

  He exhaled against the top of my head and his heavy arms curled around me and held me close. We were both getting really good at holding onto things, which meant when it was time to finally let go, it was going to be brutal. It was going to feel like something imperative and vital to my future happiness was being ripped away.

  “I’ll give us an hour and then I’ll take Grady’s place and get us ready to move.” It was never enough time. I was greedy and always after more. More time and
more of him.

  He let me go and muscled out the cots. They had seen better days but they would keep us up off the floor. Cy set them up in the center of the room after he took down the card table. I kept an eye on Webb to make sure all the racket Cy was making didn’t wake him up but the man was down for the count. There were a few extra blankets folded up on the end of the bed, so I snagged them and crawled onto one of the cots next to Cy. He shot an arm out and wrapped it around me so that he could tug me to his chest and we were lying face to face, breathing one another in.

  I lifted a finger and traced it over the flat line of his lips and shivered when he darted his tongue out to lick the tip of the digit. “I like it better when you smile.” He didn’t do it very often, so when he did, it was extra special and meant to be savored.

  “Haven’t had much reason to do that until you came crashing into my life, Sunshine.” The words were gruff and low but they were some of the sweetest I’d ever heard.

  I nuzzled into him and let my eyes drift closed after I told him, “After all of this is said and done, I hope you have enough happy memories of our time together to keep smiling after I’m gone. You shouldn’t keep something that special all to yourself.”

  One of his hands cupped the back of my skull, his fingers threading through my hair as he held me so close it was almost like he was trying to absorb me. He wanted to take me all in just as badly as I wanted to experience everything he had to offer. It was an exhilarating feeling that dulled the edge of fear and anxiety that was making my nerves tingle.

  “This time with you has been unforgettable, Leo. Both the good and the bad. Without a doubt, when I think about you, it will put a big, stupid smile on my face. I’ve never met anyone like you before. The situation around us keeps getting worse and worse but you keep getting better and better. Letting that go is going to be harder than I want to think about while I still have you in my arms.”

  The metal bar from the cot dug into my side as I scooted even closer to him so I could throw my leg over his. Everything inside of me was screaming to tell him that he didn’t have to let me go, that he could hold on to me as hard as I wanted to hold onto him, but I knew it wasn’t realistic. His life was here and it wasn’t a life I understood or had a place in, not to mention the mess my own life was in back home. I had to decide if I was going to tell Chris’s wife what he was doing behind her back and risk my job and future employment. That was the last string dangling from the frayed fabric of my life before and I needed to cut it off. I needed to straighten things out, get my head out of my heart, and make things right back in San Francisco. It was time for me to do the right thing instead of living in fear of the consequences. Maybe once I did that, I could take an even bigger risk and try and figure out a way that would keep this man and his life changing smile in my world.

  “No letting go just yet. Get some sleep, Cy, you need to recharge.” We both did, so it was no surprise that when I quit talking to him, his breathing got shallow as his chest rose and fell against mine when he drifted off. It didn’t take long for me to follow him into oblivion.

  Sadly, the reprieve didn’t last very long. It only felt like my eyes were shut for five minutes when I was jerked awake by the sound of raised voices and the whir of an engine. I was going to whisper Cy’s name to see if he had heard the noise as well, but he was already wide awake. I watched his brows furrow and his face set in hard lines of concentration. He put a finger over my lips as I nodded that I knew I shouldn’t make a sound. He inclined his head toward the now empty bed as the voices from outside rose even louder.

  “Hold up! Let me see some identification.” The words came from Grady followed by Webb’s, “I apologize for the weapons but we’ve run into a bit of trouble the last few days.”

  It was a female voice that replied, cautious and careful. “You’re on government land and this is a government outpost, gentleman. I don’t care how much trouble you’re in or how far out of your element you are, it is never appropriate to greet an armed law enforcement officer with drawn weapons. Now, put down the guns and you show me some goddamn ID.”

  The woman’s voice didn’t waver or crack, which I thought was impressive considering she was facing off with two armed men and she had no clue what either was capable of. Cy rolled off the side of the cot and inched his way over to the window by the front door of the cabin, careful to keep his head low and his movements slow and steady. He peered out the window and must have approved of what he saw because he yanked open the door and stepped out front after telling me to stay put until he came and got me.

  “Officer McKenna. Sorry to show up here unannounced but these fellas aren’t exaggerating about it being a bad few days. Brynn should have called your station to tell you what was going on.”

  Curious because Cy seemed to know the woman the authoritative voice belonged to, I couldn’t stay huddled in fear any longer. I copied Cy’s meticulous movements toward the front door until I could peek out of the same window, hopefully without being seen.

  The woman was dressed in a khaki uniform and she had a dark baseball hat on top of her head but the drab clothing and the gear covering the top of her icy blonde hair in no way detracted from how gorgeous she was. Taller than Emrys and rocking more curves than a mountain pass, the woman was stunning and clearly not amused at having the barrel of a shotgun pointed directly at her. Her eyes never left Webb, who didn’t lower the gun despite her obvious familiarity with Cy.

  “I didn’t get a call about you being in trouble, Warner. I got a call out because one of the rafting guides called in a report of a couple of mules running loose down by the water. They were loaded down for the trail but no riders or ranchers came up to claim them. The leads had your logo on them, Cy. I was out here looking for your trail group to figure out what the hell is going on.”

  The news about the mules made Cy stiffen and had Grady swearing under his breath. No longer able to stay hidden or quiet. I poked my head out the door and demanded, “Why wouldn’t the mules still be with Emrys and Sutton?”

  The beautiful woman shifted her gaze to me and then back to Webb, who finally lowered the barrel of his shotgun. The woman glared at him, and even though he had to be hurting still, a cocky grin pulled at the man’s mouth. He clearly appreciated the woman’s steely stance and fierce bravado in a different way than I did.

  “Like I said, no riders were found anywhere near where the mules were located. We sent a few rangers up and down the river but no one turned up anything. There were reports of dirt bike tracks on one of the more remote trails, but no sign of horses.”

  “Shit.” Cy bit the word out and shoved his hands through his hair. “We were on a ride with eight guests. It’s been a shit show. Someone is growing marijuana up off one of the trailheads and the growers are trying to keep the area clear. They rode up on us with dirt bikes and pinned us down in an ambush, way up river. My brothers and I split the group up and we were all racing back to the ranch. Sutton had the mules and one of the girls from the group with him. If you found the mules and not my brother, that’s bad, really bad.”

  The woman blinked slowly and then moved to rest her hands on her hips. “You’re telling me you think the people behind the grow field have your brother? Sutton wouldn’t go anywhere without a fight, especially if he had a guest with him. You Warners aren’t built that way.”

  Cy grunted his response as the radio clipped to the woman’s hip opposite the one with the gun crackled to life.

  “McKenna, we got a group of campers on the river who are reporting a speckled appaloosa, minus a rider. The horse is injured and they’re reporting that the saddle has blood on it. How far away from the location are you?”

  The woman sighed and pulled the radio off her belt so she could speak into it. “We have a problem. Has base reported in with a call from the Warner ranch?” There was a negative reply but the voice on the other end of the radio mentioned several rangers were tied up with another body in the river. The woman swo
re and replied back, “The brothers were out on the trail and ran into some trouble. Trouble of the gun toting and murdering kind. I think we might have stumbled onto why we suddenly have bodies showing up in our river. I’m at ranger station 15, let me finish up here, and I’ll head down to the river and get a statement from the campers.”

  “Copy that. Be careful out there.”

  She put the radio back and narrowed her eyes at Cy, who started to pace back and forth in jerky steps.

  “Tell me where you think the drug field is and I’ll head that way. I have an extra radio on the ATV. I’ll give you the spare and call in if I find any signs of your brother.”

  Cy barked out an ugly laugh and shook his head. “No fucking way, Ten. If they have my brother, then the only way you’re getting to the field is if I take you.”

  “Ten?” The question came from an openly curious Webb and was met with an eye roll.

  “Tennyson McKenna. Officer McKenna to you.” There was bite in her tone and it had Webb grinning and Grady groaning.

  “Well, Officer McKenna, these guys put a bullet in me and they very well may have killed my brother. I’m with Warner. If you want to get to where the bad guys are, then we’re going with you.”

  She huffed out a breath and looked at me questioningly. All I could do was shrug and mutter, “I go where he goes, and if they took Sutton, that means they probably have my best friend, as well. I can’t stay here by myself and I can’t leave her wherever she is. We’re going.” There was no time for doubt, no time to consider failure or fault. All I could think about was the fact that Em needed me and I had to be there for her. No matter what kind of dangers might be waiting for me on the way to her.