THE MONSTER INSIDE ME: The Immortal Chronicles: Book One

by Tristin Clark

  “Well if I gain the same power as Augustine after I ascend, then I’ll look into her for you.” His expression grows serious as his eyes widen.

  “You’d do that?” he asks.

  “If I can. Don’t get your hopes up. I have no idea what I will be capable of.”

  “Well, you’ll inherit all of your mate’s abilities, plus something of your own,” he tells me.

  “I wonder what that will be.” I think back on everything I’ve seen my mate do. He’s capable of so much. Will I really be capable of doing the same? If so, then Hell freaking yeah!

  “I’ve heard, for humans, that it’s usually something that you’re good at in this form,” Aza informs me.

  “What am I good at?” I wonder.

  “You’re good at ceramics?” he mentions. I roll my eyes.

  “Right. I can totally see me now. Sculpting life size clay human models and turning them into real beings,” I joke.

  “First off, that’s a thing and that voodoo shit is freaking creepy. It’s so weird seeing those clay creatures walk around. Secondly, you’re not just good at ceramics. You have quite the talent at observing people and reading them. I’m calling it right now, you’re either going to have the eye of sight, like the queen or something similar to it.”

  “Whoa. That would be so cool to be able to see the future but also annoying and depressing. I kind of hope I don’t get that ability.” I don’t know how she handles seeing the future. It’d drive me nuts.

  “Hmm. Beats me. Guess we’ll find out when that day comes but if I get it right or am close, you owe me,” he says, winking.

  “And what do I owe you?”

  “A favor.” I smirk and shake my head.

  “You demons and your favors.”

  “It’s our best bargaining chip.”

  “Naw. I’m good.” I turn and continue walking. “I am not getting locked into a deal with a demon,” I tell him.

  “I see I’ve taught you well over the last few years,” he brags.

  “You’ve definitely took the load off my mate. He will be pleased or annoyed. I don’t even know,” I admit.

  “Why don’t you try asking him. Have you heard him at all recently?” Aza asks. I sigh before answering.

  “No. He’s still giving me the silent treatment, but I can feel him from time to time, so I know he’s not gone,” I mention.

  “At least you know he’s there. Like I told you before. He’s gotta do what he’s got to do, to keep himself sane. The guy can barely control himself, let alone his Devil. Plus, he’s been busy calling on favors, trying to track down your ex boy toy from within his bubble of lameness. Don’t be too hard on him. You know he still adores his boo thang,” Aza says. I smile lightly at his attempt at making me feel better.

  “I know. I still feel him. Mostly at night when I’m resting. I feel him when he relaxes. His calmness relaxes me. Puts me at ease. It’s the only time where I feel close to him. The only time I feel his presence.”

  “I’ll have to teach him your lullaby, because Satan knows, my handsome voice is the only thing to shut them pretty eyes of yours at night.” I smile and huff.

  “Yeah, yeah,” I toy. Aza wraps his arm around my shoulder, and we continue walking.

  “One week, baby girl. We busting out of this biznatch in one week.”

  “One week,” I repeat.

  “One week. Now scream it!”

  “ONE WEEK!” I happily shout.

  “Hellz yeah, my future queen! Bye bye looney home! Helllllloooo Hell! WOOOO! We going home!” Aza excitedly cheers.

  “One week until I see you, my mate. One week,” I tell my Devil, yet he does not respond. “You’re going to have to talk to me eventually, you know. Please talk to me. I miss your voice. Augustine?” I wait for him to answer… but there is only silence. I sigh heavily.

  “Fine, but when I come home. I better hear your voice or—”

  “I’ll see you soon,” I hear his gloomy voice speak and as sad as he sounds, I still smile.

  “See you soon.”

  CHAPTER 36 - DO I KNOW YOU?

  One Week Later…

  Austin’s POV

  I haven’t spoken to her in almost seven months. I can’t. It’s become too much. I’ve hung on for as long as I can. I can hang on no more. I have lost myself. I have lost everything I have worked so hard to achieve. My Devil remains in its form. I haven’t morphed back into my human like form in over a year. I can’t handle the pain in that form, but I can endure it in this one. I can endure it just enough.

  “Augustine? Are you even listening to me?” mother asks. I’m laying back on my bed, within my cave. My hands rest behind my head, as I gaze up at the cave ceiling. I’m lost in a distant memory of the night I claimed my soul.

  “Augustine!” she shouts to get my attention.

  “What?” I barely whisper.

  “They caught him,” she says. My eyes widen and I jump to my feet in an instant.

  “What? Where?” I urgently ask.

  “Just outside Emilia’s hospital. He was waiting for her to leave—” I cut her off. My blood red eyes bulging. My heart pounds against my chest.

  “Leave? She’s leaving?” I ask, my voice booming at the end. The cave around us rattles for a few seconds before ceasing.

  “For fucks sake Augustine. Were you tuning me out this entire time? YES! She’s leaving! Well, soon. Right before they were about to step outside the protective shield, Azael spotted the angel. The angel didn’t see them behind the illusion. That gave Azael the opportunity to call in backup.” Mother moves towards me and lays a hand against my cheek. She smiles warmly before she speaks, “They got him Auggy. He’s in Hell. He’s in your father’s hands as we speak,” she says, while smiling brightly. I feel as though a massive weight has been lifted off my shoulders. I can breathe. For once, since losing my soul, I feel an emotion I thought was lost to me. I feel hope. Excitement. Happiness.

  “Well then, where is she? Tell Azael to bring her to me. Now!” I impatiently urge.

  “Okay! Okay!” mother shouts happily and performs this little happy dance she does when something excites her. “Ooooh! I can’t believe this is finally happening! Yay! Emilia is coming home. I’m so excited!”

  “Mother!” I yell. I can wait no longer. I need my soul and I need her now.

  “Alright! Fine! Geesh. Can’t even do a happy dance.” I watch her relax and gaze away for a second, before blinking and returning her happy smile to me. “Done and message received,” she says, smiling.

  My eyes are locked on the cave entrance. I glance around, waiting. I wait for what must have been a few seconds.

  “Well? Where is she?” I ask out of impatience.

  “I mean, I didn’t quite give him exact coordinates,” she says. “Ask your mate. I’m sure she’d be glad to hear your voice,” she rudely replies. My jaw clenches and my heart races with anxiety.

  I could reach out to her, but I don’t. I haven’t spoken to her in quite a while. Well, except for the few words I spoke a week ago. Before that, I had blocked her. I could no longer hear her voice. I could not bear to hear it. Hearing it, caused me too much pain. Hearing it, made my blood boil, only because it made me miss her even more.

  “You ask her yet?” I ignore my mother and take a deep breath.

  “Ask him where they are,” I tell her. She rolls her eyes and huffs.

  “You are such a baby. Fine. I’ll ask.” She pauses for a moment. “Graveyard. How cliché—”

  I vanish before mother can finish her sentence.

  I appear within the graveyard. I glance up and there she is...

  I lose my breath. I’m standing at a distance, away from her. I’m staring, gazing at my mate in disbelief. She’s here. She’s come home. I can’t blink. Can’t move. I don’t want to move. I don’t want to blink for if I do, I know she’ll disappear. I swallow back the lump in my throat and gaze at her from where I stand.

  She’s changed. Grown. Mat
ured into a woman. She looks as if she’s gone through Hell and back, but to me, she’s still the most beautiful thing, I’ve ever seen. Her dark brown hair is longer. Her skin is paler. She squats, bending to gaze upon one’s grave. I watch her. Study her from afar. It’s only then that I realize, I am still in my Devil form.

  I quickly morph back into my human like form, aging it to match her own mature form. She doesn’t see me. She hasn’t looked up yet. I can wait no longer. I move towards her, waiting for her to notice me. My heart is pounding. I’m nervous.

  She stands, glances up and I freeze, instantly shielding myself with an illusion. She sees me but it’s not the me she knows. Her head tilts and she observes me. I continue my approach until I stand right before her.

  “Hello,” she calmly greets.

  I move closer, stopping but a few feet away from her. The bond urges me to move closer. The urge to touch her is almost too unbearable to resist. I want to reach out, pull her close and wet those dried, pale lips of hers with my tongue. The need to hold her close is all I can think about. I need her. I need her now and I need her forever, but something within, stops me from taking her and I do not understand why.

  “Hello,” I reply.

  I feel her. She senses a connection but is confused by the illusion I display before her. I decide to maintain the illusion. I’m curious to see how she reacts to it. I’m curious to know if she’ll recognize me underneath it. I’m curious to know, if she’ll recognize the bond.

  “I’m sorry, but do I know you? I have the strangest feeling that I know you,” she says, while searching my eyes. I don’t know what color she sees. I don’t know what this form looks like. All I know, is that it is not me, but a mere illusion of someone I have created before.

  “Maybe you’ve met me in your past,” I say. I recognize the look she gives, when she is in deep thought. She is thinking. Thinking of me. Her brows squint and her chin raises.

  “I’m sure I would remember you. You kind of remind me of someone though. Someone very close to me,” she says. I can’t hide the little smirk that forms at the corner of my lips. She means me. This form reminds her of me and that makes me happy.

  “And who would that be?” I toy.

  Her wondering eyes search mine for a moment. I can feel her annoyance. I can feel her confusion. Her irritation. She feels a connection but does not understand why and it makes her angry. She turns away from me and eyes the tomb beside us. My gaze follows and I snort in distaste at the name of the angel. The one who is to blame for all.

  “Someone I’m supposed to meet but apparently he doesn’t want to see me,” I hear her admit in sadness.

  I gaze back to my mate. She thinks that I do not wish to see her. Does she not realize how long I’ve waited to see her, to touch her? If she only knew, how difficult it is for me, to refrain from ravaging her sweet, delicate, human body, right here, right now and I’ll do it. I’ll fuck her on top of her dead friend’s grave, and I’ll be more than ecstatic to do so, but I won’t. Not yet. Not until she sees me. The real me. I just wish for her to acknowledge me. Say my name, Emilia. Feel me, sweetness. I know you do.

  “Why would he not want to see you? He would be a fool to not want to see you,” I explain to her in all seriousness. Her wide eyes find mine in an instant.

  “What did you just say?” she asks in a state of surprise.

  “I said he would be a fool not to want to see you,” I repeat.

  She’s searching me again. She can’t get past the illusion but that doesn’t stop her curious nature from still searching. She’s an intelligent human. I know she senses me. She just denies it. She thinks this form can’t be me.

  “That’s what I thought you said. It’s just that when you said that, well it— it just reminded me of something someone had once told me,” she points out. A wide grin emerges. She remembers… I had once called her my fool. My sweet, sweet fool.

  I say nothing. I continue to gaze upon her, taking in every small detail about her. It’s as if I am seeing her for the first time, all over again. She’s so beautiful. So perfect to me.

  She turns and I follow her eyes as she glances around the entire graveyard. She’s searching for me. If only she knew that it is I who stands right before her. Say my name, sweetness. Just say it.

  “I suppose he isn’t coming,” she says, after a minute of searching.

  “He’ll come. I’m sure he’s closer than you think,” I tease.

  “I’m sure you’re right about that,” she says, while still searching. “Not like he can just walk out of town. Otherwise, I would have seen him long ago,” she states. She’s right. If I could have left, I would have never known a day without her, since meeting her.

  “I’m sure if he had the ability to leave this place, he would be with you,” I tell her.

  “Yeah… well, I guess if he isn’t going to show, then I’m just going to leave. It was nice chatting with you,” she tells me. She doesn’t give me a second glance. She walks away and I remain where I am, watching her flee. I don’t go after her. I don’t move. I’m frozen. Something holds me back. I don’t know what, but it stuns me. Scares me and nothing scares me more than losing her.

  I’m afraid of losing her, I realize. I’ve lost her when her friends took her. I lost her when she nearly died in my arms and I lost her when her parents stole her away. I am afraid of losing her, yet I let her walk away. Why? Why am I afraid to lose her, but allow her to walk away? What is wrong with me?

  “Turn back,” I whisper out loud yet. My heart is racing. I’m panting, nervous. I wait. “Turn back,” I repeat. “Please.” I wait, but she doesn’t hear me. She doesn’t turn back.

  I spot someone approaching her. A man. The demon. His hand pats her back and then goes around her shoulder. My jaw clenches. My anger rises. He pulls her in for a hug and she allows his affection. I’m watching them. Fuming. Her arm goes around him and she hugs him back. My blood begins to boil. I am seething.

  Now I understand why I feel the way I feel… I only wanted to know that she missed me. I only wanted to know that she still loved me, but now I know. Another has taken my place. That is why she could not detect me. That is why she could not feel the bond.

  “If that’s how you want to play, sweetness, then we’ll play. We’ll play indeed.”

  Emilia’s POV

  Something in me urges me to turn back to gaze upon the mysterious man, one more time.

  He’s gone... my eyes scan the entire cemetery. He’s nowhere to be seen.

  “That’s weird,” I say out loud.

  “What’s weird?” Aza asks. I shake my head.

  “Nothing.” I reply.

  I can’t shake him from my mind. There was something about him. Something familiar. The way he acted, the way he stared… he reminded me so much of Austin, yet he looked nothing like him. I didn’t understand it and that was what frustrated me the most. I suppose I must miss like crazy, if I’m seeing him in complete strangers.

  We continue walking together, along the dirt road, inside the cemetery. I drop my arm from around Aza, as he does the same to me.

  “I’m sorry he hasn’t shown up yet. Maybe he got caught up with something,” he says.

  He’s trying to make me feel better, by making an excuse but it’s not needed. I know my mate, at least I thought I did. The Austin I knew would have been by my side within a blink of an eye, yet he isn’t…

  I sigh heavily before replying,

  “No. He would have been here by now. Something must be wrong,” I point out. Aza swings around, standing in front of me. His eyes widen in worry.

  “Is he in trouble?” he asks.

  “No. I can’t feel him. I haven’t been able to feel him since I returned,” I tell him.

  “That’s not a good thing Emi. Mates should always be able to feel each other,” he explains.

  “Well, now I’m worried,” I tell him.

  If I can’t feel him, then what does that mean? Is he hurt? Gone? Did
he return to Hell and not tell me? No… his mother would have told us. He’s here. He’s just… I don’t know. I don’t know what he is doing.

  “Reach out to him. Call him. Let him hear your voice,” Aza urges. I bite my bottom lip and take a deep breath.

  “Austin? You there? It’s me. You know, your mate? Where are you? I’m here. I’m home. Come to me. Please,” I end, begging. I wait. Silence. My bottom lip begins to quiver.

  “Nothing?” Aza asks. I shake my head, while tears threaten to fall.

  “Does he not want me anymore? Is something wrong with me? With him?” I ask, while crying.

  “I just notified the queen about him and no Emi… don’t think like that.” He pauses and looks away. “Hold on.” he says, gazing down for a moment. I know that look. I’ve seen it many times as I’ve seen it on Katherine’s and my blue eyes. He’s communicating through their Hell mind link.

  “What did she say?” I ask, while sniffling. He glances up at me.

  “She said she will take care of it,” he says, and then gives me a small smile.

  “What if he doesn’t want to see me?” The thought crushes me. Tears begin, streaming down my cheeks.

  “Aww. Boo thang. Come here,” Aza says, and pulls me in for a hug. I hide my face against his chest and sob while he holds me dearly. “It’ll all be fine. I promise you. Maybe he needs to get his Devil in check before he sees you. Our demonic and Devil sides can be quite the handful, when it comes to handling our emotions. I wouldn’t put it passed him, if he is all sorts of fucked up, after dealing with that long, tortuous separation. He probably just has a mad case of separation anxiety.

  We’re not going anywhere baby girl, and neither is he. He’ll show up. Just be patient with him.” He pulls back, with his fingers laced in my hair, and holds the back of my head. He smiles, sympathetically. “I spotted a rinky dink carnival not far from here. I don’t know about you, but I’m down for a bit of fun and some fine ass human pus—”