Something Borrowed (Lone Star Match Book 2)

by Megan Ryder

  The big question was, how did she feel about him? Did she love him? She hadn’t considered falling in love ever. She had always planned to find the perfect partner for her life, one who understood and had the same career path. Kids had not really figured in to the picture. Hell, she wasn’t even sure she wanted them, knowing instinctively her life was not conducive to children. But Grady would be a fantastic dad, coaching little league games and football practices, and being an overprotective dad when boys came calling. And where would she be? In the office, working late on contracts and client meetings, barely knowing what her children’s lives were.

  Was that the life she wanted? Because that was the track she was on and if it wasn’t, she’d better decide real fast.

  Even now, hearing the requirements for a spouse from the firm, while not a requirement per se but a recommendation, they only firmed up her resolve that she and Grady could never happen, not if she wanted to make partner at the firm. They would never accept Grady and he would be miserable there. She would be caught between two worlds – one that required long hours, full attention, and a certain status, and the other with Grady, the white picket fence, and weekend with the family. Her life as it stood now was never going to be the way Grady wanted. But she wanted that. The picture he painted, with his gorgeous Victorian home that he was restoring, the games he’d be coaching, the way he’d glare at the boys who came calling on his daughters. She wanted to be there for that. How could she reconcile that life with her goals of being a partner?

  Yes, her parents pushed her and she had made her decisions based on what they wanted for her and their kids. She had spent her life trying to live up to their ideals and failing every time. Her parents didn’t want these goals for themselves, to brag to their friends about their successful children. Well, not entirely. They wanted their children to be self-sufficient, independent, and secure for their futures and the best way they knew how was to drive them towards financial security in fields that were strong and solid. She understood those reasons. Life was uncertain and precarious. She couldn’t rely on anyone but herself. And if she ever wanted a family, she had to be prepared to insure their future too.

  Needing to avoid the melancholy thoughts, she hopped in the shower and headed downstairs quickly, hoping to catch Grady but his truck was gone. She walked in the kitchen to find coffee and Matthew sitting at the table, reading emails on his laptop. She grabbed a cup and sat across from him, not sure what to say. She and Matthew had met through Caroline and they had become friends, especially once they started working for the same firm. Matthew had tutored her and guided her through law school. He had stuck his neck out for her internship and then job at the firm.

  And last night had thrown it back in his face by telling him she hated her job. Nice way to pay back a friend.

  She perched on the edge of the seat, cupping her hands around the coffee mug and stared at the liquid.

  “Are you waiting for some divination from coffee? I can tell you that coffee may be the giver of life but it doesn’t have the answers and neither does alcohol.” Matthew’s voice was low and steady but his attention never wavered from the monitor. She started then took another sip.

  “So, you want to talk about it?” she asked.

  “Vegas rules, right, Brigid?”

  This time she definitely got the cool tone and it pissed her off. She pushed the coffee away and lowered the laptop screen until he focused on her. “What?”

  “Screw Vegas rules. We need to talk.” She grimaced. “I seem to be saying that a lot this week.”

  “Fine, let’s talk.” He leaned back and crossed his arms in front of him. “So, you hate your job?”

  She bit her lower lip. “Yeah, that surprised me too.”

  He arched his eyebrow and waited, a time-honored lawyer trick, waiting for the witness to get uncomfortable with the silence and spill all. She sipped her coffee again and tried to put her feelings in words.

  “I thought I was happy. And I am. I mean, I love being a lawyer.”

  “Do you?”

  “I thought I did. Property law isn’t the sexiest but I’m pretty good at it.”

  “Peterman had some praise for you on some pro bono work you did for him.” At her quizzical look, he clarified. “The Diaz case? Slum lords?”

  She smiled, remembering how she had helped that family with their landlord who refused to fix the atrocious living conditions. Grady had asked her to look into it for him. He had helped the family out with some repairs but the place should have been condemned. Turned out, the landlord had been jacking up the rents, threatening to turn in the tenants to immigration, and keeping the living conditions worse than any animal should live in. She had been allowed to work the case because every lawyer at the firm was required to put in some pro bono work, to assuage the partners’ conscience about the rest of their case load, and she had exceeded expectations on that one.

  “Yes, that case was great. I was glad to help them and the other families get what they deserved and the landlord forced to make the improvements he should have been making all along.”

  “And you did some great work with Grady on saving that site for historic value. Could it be the larger firm is not what you like?” His voice was even and nonjudgmental, as if he were guiding an intern to a realization.

  “I sense you’re slow-walking me somewhere, Matthew. Just get to the point okay? I’m not some simpering idiot who needs her feelings preserved.”

  “I’m not leading you anywhere. I’m telling you outright that maybe the firm is not for you. Maybe you need something smaller, something less corporate.”

  “Yeah, I can see my parents’ reaction to that one. ‘You left one of the most prestigious firms when you were on the track for partner? Maybe you weren’t that good at what you do.’” Her voice deepened as she mimicked her father. “That’s completely opposite to my goals.”

  He stood and gathered his laptop. “Maybe it’s time to let go of your goals and make new ones, ones that make you happy.” He started to walk out of the room then stopped. “How does Grady fit into this?”

  She frowned, staring down at her coffee again, hoping that a vision would materialize. “I don’t know.”

  “Make sure he has a place in your life or end it now. He’s a great guy but deserves everything from you. If you can’t give it, then you need to walk away now.”

  “Believe me, I’ve tried. He won’t leave.”

  Matthew turned pensive. “Then you have some serious decisions to make.”

  “Where is he?”

  “He’s staying at the place he’s renovating. He wants to make sure everything is okay.” He paused. “I assume you know where that is?”

  She arched her eyebrow. “Playing matchmaker, Matthew?”

  “No, I just know how Grady feels about you. I have my reservations. Not that I don’t think you’re great but I just think you’re both on different paths and I worry he’ll get hurt.” Matthew paused. “He has he told you about our mother?”

  Brigid jerked her head, surprised at the change of subject. “Only that she left when he was young. I know you both grew up separately.”

  Matthew laid the laptop on the table and sat back down. “It’s really his story to tell, but here’s the legal brief version. Mom didn’t like her life as a lower middle-class housewife and found a new man who could give her a new life, one in a decidedly upwardly mobile manner. She decided to take me because she thought I would fit in to her new life better than Grady. I got better grades, was older and more able to take care of myself. So, she left him with dad and never saw him again.”

  Brigid stared at Matthew, a heavy feeling in the pit of her stomach. “Oh, my God. Poor Grady. How could she just leave him?”

  Matthew shook his head, a pained expression on his face. “I never understood it. Grady and I were close growing up, but we were pretty young when this happened. I guess my stepfather knew about me but didn’t know about Grady so he never questioned there b
eing a second child. I don’t think he would have gone along with separating us. I don’t know.” He paused. “My mom is not a bad person; she just wanted a different life than she had with my father. She wanted comfort, money, security. All things she never thought she’d ever have with dad. He was happy with a nice house in the suburbs, nothing fancy, maybe a little extra in the bank for a rainy day. But no European trips, fancy clothes, and jewelry. He wasn’t like that. Mom was terrified of being poor and she saw us as one step away from the poorhouse. I think she regrets her decision to leave Grady, but not her decision to leave. Or maybe I’m just hoping she regrets it. Her leaving gave me the opportunities I have today and I’m grateful. But what did it do to Grady?”

  Brigid covered her mouth with her hand, tears in her eyes, as she thought of the little boy watching his mother leave and not knowing if he’d see her again. Then realizing she was never coming back for him, that she had abandoned him. “I never knew it was that callous, that cold. How awful for him.”

  Matthew stood. “So, you can see why I worry about him with you. Not that you’re our mother, but you want similar things. Security, position, money. You look outside of yourself for what you want. Grady has already been disappointed and betrayed by one woman for those exact same things and it damaged the little boy. I fear that you could destroy him.”

  Brigid glared at him, blood pounding in her ears. “I would never betray Grady like that.”

  “Aren’t you? By leading him on, you’re setting him up for a fall that he might never recover from. I don’t think you’re a bad person and I think you truly care for him. But do you care enough?”

  She sighed. “Matthew, I appreciate your honesty. I’ve never hidden from Grady my goals or plan. He knows what I want. If he chooses to pursue this relationship, despite me trying to break it off, that’s his business. All I can promise you is that I will not intentionally hurt him. But I have to do my job and I need you to support me in that.”

  Matthew nodded, sadness still in his eyes. “I fully support you in your job. I know, above everyone else, what a toll the job can take. And I will support you as best I can. But, Brigid, once this week and this deal is done, please think about what you really want, not what everyone else wants for you, and make a decision that you can live with.”

  “I will, Matthew. And I’ll try not to hurt Grady.”

  Matthew gathered his laptop. “Then I’ll leave you to it. Just, please, be honest with him and yourself. And don’t hurt him. Or yourself.”

  She’d try. Her heart ached for the boy he had been and the man he was now. How could he ever want to be with her if he had experienced that kind of betrayal before? And was she really ready to give it all up for him?

  *

  Brigid wandered into the office to work but her heart and mind wasn’t in it. Nothing new had shown on email and, honestly, she was feeling annoyed that she was working on her vacation. Terrence hadn’t worked from the Caribbean, citing Internet issues. Whatever. That was bogus and everyone knew it, but he could get away with it with Peterman because they golfed and played racquetball together. Brigid was not athletic and was too busy working. Not that they would ever invite her anyway.

  She wandered out to the patio but the whipping wind and chill coming off the ocean in advance of the storm made walking the beach unattractive. Just about everyone had scattered for the day but she grabbed Wyatt who was headed out front.

  Anna slouched against the door jamb, arms folded in front of her, a sour look on her face.

  “What are you guys up to today? I can’t seem to find anyone. Maybe I’ll tag along.”

  Anna scowled at her. “I promised the community theater that I’d help out today with the youth program. Wyatt offered to help with the sets or whatever they need. Besides if I hang around here, Caroline will find some stupid cutesy crafty thing to do for the wedding.”

  Interesting. Anna wanted Wyatt to herself. Maybe they’d finally take everyone’s advice and have some angry sex, although judging by the heated looks darting between the two, some angry sex may have already occurred. Brigid had no interest in getting in the middle of that one. “Maybe I’ll hunt Delaney down and see if she wants to do anything.”

  “You’re not working, Saint Brigid?” Anna’s caustic tone reminded Brigid of all of the comments made about her job all week and it just pissed her off.

  “At least I have a job, Anna.” Brigid sighed, immediately remorseful. “I’m sorry. That was uncalled for. And no, I’m done for the week.”

  “Right,” Anna drew out the word. “Don’t worry about it. I’m sure I’ll find something better soon.”

  But hurt was reflected in her eyes, a pain Anna couldn’t quite hide despite her bravado. Understanding pride and a desire not to show weakness, Brigid decided to ignore it. For now.

  Anna continued as if nothing had happened. “Delaney and Ethan headed to mainland early, picking up some stuff for Caroline. They’re probably staying there overnight. We all decided to scatter for the night, to give Caroline and Matthew one night alone without all of us stressing them out. I’ll probably head to the hotel where I reserved a room. They’re going fast so you’d better call them soon. We grabbed them a gift basket of stuff for tonight. You owe me thirty bucks.”

  Shit. Brigid had forgotten they had talked about it Tuesday. Now she had to find somewhere to stay. “Fine, can you guys drop me off in town? I can grab a bus from there to the hotel.”

  Wyatt walked back in the room in time to hear the last statement. “Sure. Grab your things. We can wait a few minutes.”

  Brigid ran upstairs to throw a few things in her bag. She didn’t see Grady’s duffel so Matthew must have been right that he was planning to stay at the cottage. She grabbed her things and made it out front to catch up with Wyatt and Anna. Her stomach rumbled and she realized it was lunch time and, for the first time in a long time, she was starved. Maybe it was all that exercise from the night before. Her lips curved in a smile as she remembered the way she burned those calories and with whom she burned them. Why the heck was she even considering the hotel when she could bunk with Grady at the cottage? After last night, would he turn her away? He had said he loved her, then ran out this morning after she had not reciprocated. Maybe it was time she confronted her feelings and faced Grady the way she had faced everything else in her life. Head on.

  “Wyatt? Would you mind a slight detour?”

  Chapter Twenty-One

  Brigid waved goodbye to Wyatt and Anna, wishing Wyatt luck. Anna had been pretty brittle most of the week but working at the theater had mellowed her a bit. Still, would she give Wyatt a break at all? Brigid had her own issues to deal with. Time to see if last night was an aberration or the start of something. She hefted her bag onto the porch and rang the bell. Music echoed through the house so she couldn’t tell if the bell worked. Maybe she should just let herself in. But she hesitated, wanting Grady to invite her and not just barge in.

  When time dragged on and no one came, she rang the bell again and banged on the door. What if Grady had left with one of the contractors? His truck was in the driveway but that didn’t mean anything. She tried the door and it was locked. Damn. At that moment, she heard noise from the back of the house. Hammering.

  Leaving her bag on the porch along with lunch, she walked around the back, bracing herself against the wind blowing off the Gulf of Mexico. She rounded the back of the house and saw a ladder against the house, Grady at the top, the ladder shaking a little in the wind. He was shirtless and only wearing a pair of cargo shorts low on his hips thanks to the heavy tool belt. Her mouth dried at the sight and she swallowed convulsively. Damn, he was fine-looking man, better than any lawyer she had ever seen.

  “Hey, Grady,” she called up to him when she was able to speak.

  “Grab me a couple of nails in the bucket,” he called back, not even looking down.

  She glanced around and found the bucket under a bush, protected from the wind. She grabbed a few nails t
hen looked up. “Um, how do you expect me to get it up there?”

  At the sound of her voice, his head whipped down. The board he was holding shifted and he cursed. “Damn it, Brigid. What are you doing here?”

  “Well, I was bringing you lunch. Were you expecting someone else?”

  He cursed again as the board listed and slipped. “Get up on that step ladder there and help me.”

  Ah, shit. She hated heights. He knew that. But he needed her. And she had faced that damned rock wall for him. She could do this. She darted a glance from the ladder to Grady, forming up her resolve. Yes, she could totally handle this. Just give her a moment.

  “Any time, Brigid. I don’t have time for your hysteria.” He scowled at her, clearly in no mood for shit.

  The ladder wasn’t very high, about six steps. She could handle that, as long as she didn’t look down. And as long as the wind gusts stayed quiet. And as long as she didn’t think about it. Kind of like the rest of her life.

  “Okay, I’m coming. Hold your pants.” Although she wouldn’t mind if they slipped a little further. He had a superb ass.

  She scrambled up the few steps until she could hand him the nails and reach the bottom edge of the board. The ladder tilted a little in the soft soil but she steadied herself against the side of the house and swallowed, trying desperately to think of anything but falling to her death. Not that a fall from the ladder would kill her. Just maim her a bit.

  Grady finished nailing the board and descended. She followed, happy to be on solid ground again.

  He wiped his hands and then planted them on his hips. “What are you doing here?”

  She shrugged. “Thought you could use some lunch.”

  His face gave nothing away. He glanced at her empty hands.