The Renegade (Rebel Hearts, #1)

by Baldwin, Lily

  “With yer permission, I will make the rounds and visit the outlying cottars.”

  She nodded her approval. “Thank ye,” she said absently. “I would appreciate that.”

  “And if ye do not object, I will bring Nathan and Caleb.”

  She whirled around to face him. “Whatever for?” Straightaway, she locked eyes with Nathan who was now standing in the doorway behind the captain of her guard. Her heart started to race at the sight of him, and it all came hurtling back at her. Clinging to her composure, she steeled her shoulders. “Good morrow,” she said, her voice steady

  “Good morrow,” he answered, canting his head to the side. His thoughtful gaze held hers. At length, he continued in a soft voice. “I’ve not seen ye today.”

  Her stomach fluttered, but she fought for calm. “My duties are many.”

  “Then ye’ve been busy.” He gave her his lazy sideways smile. “I’m glad to know ye’ve not been avoiding me.”

  She was busy, but of course, she had also been avoiding him, although she was certainly not going to admit as much to him. He needn’t know how tumultuous her deeply buried feelings were.

  Silence hung in the air.

  At length, Declan came forward again. “We will leave then if there is nothing else ye require, my lady.”

  “I do require something.” Her casual tone belied her racing heart.

  Declan looked at her expectantly.

  “A word with ye in private.”

  Nathan met her gaze. She could see a series of emotions pass his face, none of which she was willing to reflect upon long enough to identify. Then he slowly backed away from the doorway. Without a word, Alison also took her leave.

  Then she whirled to face Declan. “Why would ye seek to take Nathan with ye?”

  He lifted his shoulders. “I wanted to show him our lands.”

  Her hands settled on her hips. “He’s a thief-taker, remember, no better than a common criminal. Ye said so yerself.”

  The older man blushed. “I know I said that but after what transpired here with Egan, not to mention how he aided our journey home...” Declan raked a hand through his silver-threaded hair. “He has impressed me with his keen thinking.”

  “I am not going to marry him!”

  Declan’s eyes widened. “I was not trying to imply that ye should. I was simply trying to say that I have come to admire him. I enjoy his company, and I thought it might be a hospitable thing to do.”

  She tilted her chin higher. “Well, then...I suppose it would be all right if he joined ye.”

  He dipped his head to her. “Thank ye, my lady.”

  “When will ye return?”

  “Expect us late tomorrow evening.”

  She nodded her approval. “Take what ye need from our stores for the cottars. Just be sure to tell Murray so that he can mark it down.”

  “I will, my lady. Be careful while we’re away.”

  She smiled reassuringly. “Ye needn’t fash yerself, Declan. I’m always careful.”

  He bowed to her, then turned and left the pantry.

  Standing alone, her chest started to tighten and an inexplicable hollowness settled in the pit of her stomach. Without thinking, she raced from the pantry into the kitchen.

  “My lady,” Agnes exclaimed with wide eyes. “All ye all right? I’ve never seen ye rush so.”

  “I’m fine,” she said absently while she quickly scanned the kitchen.

  The men had already left.

  She started toward the kitchen door to chase after them, but then she froze. In that moment, she realized why she had the sudden urge to track them down.

  She wanted to bid Nathan farewell.

  Swallowing hard, she closed her eyes and took a deep breath. Then she turned on her heel and retreated back to the pantry.

  “My lady,” Alison said, looking up from where she sat perched on a stack of gain sacks. “I can finish here, if ye wish to join yer betrothed.”

  “Thank ye, Alison. That is very considerate of ye, but I’ve been gone from Bròn for too long as it is. Nathan will be in good hands with Declan.”

  Alison looked at her curiously at first, but then she smiled and said, “As ye wish, my lady.”

  Elora turned away from Alison’s probing gaze, pretending to be occupied with counting the stacks of cheese wheels, but, in truth, she was trying to keep herself from unraveling. She took a deep breath, forcing her heart to cease its racing.

  Nathan was gone and would not return for nigh on two days. She straightened her back and forbade the sadness that kept trying to pull at her heart. Shaking her head, she dismissed her feelings as nothing more than fatigue. Now, at least she would have peace from it all—Egan’s claim, her plan of last resort, her temporary betrothed. And in that time, she would set things right at Bròn, make the rounds throughout the village, and rid her mind of the blasted yearning that now filled her thoughts.

  Chapter Eleven

  Bound for the outer realms of Brodie Territory, Nathan sat beside Declan who drove the wagon; meanwhile, Caleb rode his black mount alongside. Spring was beginning to awaken the ground. Vibrant green shoots dotted the moorland, peeking out amid the faded bracken and jutting rocks.

  “’Tis our first stop,” Declan said, pointing to a cottage in the distance. “’Tis the home of a jolly couple who will no doubt be pleased by our company, but ye’d best warn Caleb—they have three unwed daughters.”

  Nathan smiled. “We’ll let that be a surprise, shall we?”

  His gaze traced the smoke that coiled out from the cottage’s thatched rooftop in thick billowing ribbons. Then he shifted in his seat and glanced back at the bed of the wagon, which was teeming with stacks of cheese wheels, baskets of crusty bread, and burlap sacks filled with milled oats. “I used to make the rounds with my father and brothers when I was a lad,” he said absently.

  As the wagon bumped along, Declan cleared his throat, drawing Nathan’s gaze. “I ken ‘tis not my place,” the older man began, “but may I ask why ye left yer clan?”

  Nathan’s chest tightened. He was not prepared to answer questions about his past. After all, for years he had done everything he could to forget—drinking, women. And for the most part, he had succeeded, except for when night came and his dreams brought it all back. Silence hung in the air. Then at length, he posed his own question to change the subject. “How many cottars are spread across these lands?”

  “Three and twenty families live beyond the boundaries of Brodie village,” Declan answered.

  He waited tensely for Declan to continue his line of questioning, but the older man did not press Nathan, for which he was grateful.

  When they reached the edge of a partially plowed field, Nathan spied a broad-shouldered man with wild black curls and a fluffy beard. His thick arms flexed with rugged strength as he drove a pair of oxen forward, turning the soil. When he noticed their approach, he pulled on the reins to stop the great beasts and called out, “Good day, Declan!”

  Smiling, Declan jerked on the reins, bringing the wagon to a halt. Then the captain jumped down and clasped the cottar’s outstretched hand. “Good day, Fergus! How are ye and all yer beautiful lassies?”

  Fergus’s leathery face broke into a smile. “We’re well and blessed to be so.”

  “Declan!”

  Nathan shifted his gaze toward the cottage. A smiling woman with a weathered complexion came running out from the cottage, her chestnut hair flowing like a cape behind her. When she drew close enough, she nigh threw herself at Declan, squeezing him, her face straining from the effort.

  Declan chuckled. “I can’t quite breath, Aileen.”

  Fergus threw his head back with laughter. “Let the captain go, wife, before he faints dead away.”

  Laughing, Aileen did as her husband had bidden her, but then her laughter faltered as she looked beyond Delcan, her gaze settling first on Nathan and then Caleb. “Who have ye brought with ye?”

  “Allow me to introduce Nathan Campb
ell and his kinsman, Caleb,” Declan began. He hesitated for a moment before continuing, “Nathan and Lady Elora are betrothed.”

  Aileen’s eyes flashed wide. “Praise be to all the Saints! Come on then,” she said, motioning for Nathan to come closer. “Let’s have a look at ye.”

  Nathan climbed down from the wagon to greet the cottars properly, but before he knew what was happening, Aileen closed the distance between them and seized him in a crushing embrace. At length, she drew back a little and looked up at his face. “Broad shoulders, silver eyes, white teeth, I can see why ye won our lady over.” Then she glanced over at his friend. “And ye’re kinsman is also gentle on the eyes.” She called over to Caleb. “Are ye married?”

  “Not that I’m aware of,” Caleb answered, which bent Aileen over with laughter.

  “My daughters have just gone to fetch some water. Two are of age,” she added with a wink.

  Declan came forward, a smile crinkling the skin around his eyes. “Unfortunately, we cannot linger, Aileen. Ye’ll have to give our respect to yer daughters.”

  She looked pointedly at Caleb, “Don’t think I won’t.” Then, once more, she crushed Declan close. “Ye tell our lady I expect to see her soon.”

  Declan smiled down at the Aileen’s cheerful face. “I’m certain that she’ll make the rounds soon.”

  “Ye be sure to come along.” Aileen said to Nathan. “And bring yer kinsman,” she added, flashing a bright smile at Caleb.

  “I wouldn’t be able to keep him away,” Nathan began, shooting a quick glance at his friend. “He’s a sociable sort of fellow, to be sure. Aren’t ye, Caleb?”

  Caleb cocked a brow at Nathan, but he smiled amiably at Aileen and answered, “Indeed.”

  Chuckling, Declan seized a bag of grain, loaves of bread, and a wheel of cheese and filled the cottars’ arms. Then he said, “We’d best be off, men.”

  Fergus and Aileen called out words of gratitude, bidding them farewell as they rolled away, the wagon bumping over the rocky earth.

  The rest of the day passed in much the same way, journeying from cottage to cottage, handing out supplies, checking on the cottars’ welfare, and spreading word of their lady’s betrothal. Nathan was welcomed whole-heartedly by her kin whose devotion to each other and their lady was unmatched by anything Nathan had ever experienced.

  WHEN NIGHT FELL, THEY built a fire and laid out pallets beneath the stars. Nathan lay awake for some time, gazing up at the heavens and thinking about the last night he had slept out of doors with Elora tucked securely in his arms. At first, she had lain stiffly, resisting his aid, but then she surrendered to his warmth. Her body had softened, melting into his embrace. Closing his eyes, he could still smell her hair and feel her feminine curves. But the softness had not lasted. By the next morning, she had resurrected the shields around her thoughts and heart.

  Now, lying on Brodie soil, beneath a blanket of stars, he wondered whether he would ever come to know the woman hidden behind the polished stonewall that she had so skillfully erected. With unanswered questions racking his brain and the memory of her softness filling his arms, he, at last, drifted off to sleep.

  THE NEXT MORNING, THEY awoke before dawn and set out. After several stops, they reached the coast by midday. The Moray firth stretched out before them. They unhitched the horses to let them graze at the craggy bracken. Then, while Caleb chose a solitary walk, Nathan and Declan headed down to the shore. Picking up a smooth stone, Nathan threw it beyond the rocks jutting up from the waves. Unable to keep his thoughts to himself, he turned to Declan and asked, “How did yer chieftain die?”

  “A riding accident freed us from his yoke.” Then he added quickly, “I ken ‘tis not holy to speak ill of the dead, but there was little to recommend in Cormag Brodie’s character.”

  “Was no one saddened by his passing?”

  Declan shook his head grimly. “When they carried his lifeless body into the great hall, no one shed a tear—least of all, Elora.”

  “What of Elora’s mother?”

  Pain shadowed Declan’s features. “Lady Moira died nearly eleven years ago when Elora was just ten and Temperance was five. Took ill with a fever, she did.” He expelled a long breath. “She was only five and twenty, but despite her youth, she was frail...lovely but frail.”

  “Laird Brodie must have been hard on her.”

  Declan nodded. “He was a cruel husband.”

  “And demanding, no doubt.”

  But Declan shook his head sadly. “In a way, he was, but part of his cruelty was that he actually demanded very little of her. He gave her nothing but disdain. She had no say on any matter. She was trusted with no duties, allowed no purpose or interest. She could not even mother her daughters. He kept them apart, relying on wet nurses and castle servants to see to their needs.”

  “I’m surprised he did not remarry to beget an heir.”

  Declan lifted his shoulders. “Murray and I often wondered that very thing. We believe he never thought death would come for him.” Then Declan winced. “I dread to think how he would have behaved toward a son. Laird Brodie did not share power.”

  “How did he treat Elora?”

  “He took no interest in her; that is, until he realized he could marry her off as a means to gain greater wealth.”

  “She did not experience his cruelty first hand?”

  “Besides the occasional biting remark, he ignored her.” Then Declan’s face brightened. “But Elora worked this to everyone’s advantage. Right beneath the blackguard’s nose, she started making the rounds herself when she turned fifteen. Unbeknownst to her father, she would follow after him, healing all he harmed. She would sneak food to those in need. She raised their spirits, and gained her people’s trust. But she never let him see. She kept her work, her thoughts, her worries hidden from his cruel gaze.”

  Nathan slowly nodded. Now, he understood. For years, she had carried the wellbeing of the entire clan on her shoulders, but she had to do so in secret, doing what she must to hide her deeds from her father’s watchful eye.

  “Thank ye for trusting me enough to share yer lady’s story,” Nathan said. Then he raked his hand through his hair as his conscience pricked for not having given the captain the same trust. With a deep breath, he turned back and met the older man’s gaze. “I did not leave my clan. I was banished by my father.”

  Brows drawn, Declan asked, “But why?”

  A beautiful lass with black curls and startling blue eyes came to the fore of his mind. He shook the image from his thoughts. “Dark times befell our clan, for which my father blamed me.”

  “Was he right in his judgement?”

  Nathan lifted his shoulders. “I suppose...at least, in part. Forgive me...I...” his words trailed off. He had never spoken of Cait to anyone, not even Caleb.

  Declan gave him an assessing look, then he jerked his head toward the wagon. “Come, let us hitch up the horses. We’ve a few more stops to make today. Then we’ll be back home by nightfall.”

  Home.

  The word hung in the air around him. For the first time in a long time, he longed for home, for belonging, but then a mirthless laugh fled his lips as he jerked around and started up the shore toward the wagon.

  The past could never be undone.

  “Nathan,” he stopped in his tracks and met Declan’s gaze. “I was not in favor of my lady’s plan when we set out for Edinburgh, but now I’m glad ye’re here.” The captain lifted his shoulders. “Sometimes things have a way of working out differently than we planned.”

  For the rest of the day, Declan’s words stayed with him, and he wondered if he had truly accepted Lady Elora’s offer because of a desire for greater wealth—after all, as Caleb had already pointed out, he had money to spare. What if his soul craved what he had long since believed he did not deserve?

  When they arrived back at Castle Bròn, the moon shone brightly overhead. He sought out Elora’s company straightaway. He knew not what he would say to her, only that
he wanted desperately to see her. Murray, who had been meeting with several villagers in the courtyard when Declan drove the wagon through the open gates, directed Nathan to the solar.

  Hastening through the great hall, he took the stairs onto the high dais two at a time. Once he passed behind the screen, he started down the passage toward the family rooms. Still several feet away from the solar, he drew to a halt when he heard upset voices emanating from the door, which was slightly ajar.

  Quietly, so as to not be heard, he drew closer and listened.

  “Days ago, ye said that we would go for a ride.” He recognized Temperance’s voice.

  “I told ye. I’ve been busy,” came Elora’s clipped response.

  “If ye’re so busy that ye cannot stop to eat or take a short ride, why do ye not let me help ye?”

  He leaned slightly forward to peer through the crack in the doorway and saw Elora shaking her head adamantly. “Ye don’t have the skills.”

  “Nor will I unless ye teach me,” Temperance shot back. “Elora, I spent another day alone in my chamber, embroidering, and then I wandered the castle aimlessly, because everyone else has a purpose except for me.”

  Elora studied the parchment on the table in front of her. “I’m sorry, but ye rush through tasks. Ye’re never careful. Our people call ye Tempest lovingly, but also for a reason.”

  “Listen to yerself,” Temperance said, her voice rising. “Ye’re becoming just like him!”

  Elora jerked upright. Nathan had never seen her eyes so cold. “Like who?” she demanded.

  “Like father!”

  Elora’s eyes flashed wide, then narrowed in anger. “I am nothing like him!”

  Temperance shook her head. “Ye don’t even see it,” she said bitterly as she reached for something on the floor. “Here, ye dropped yer precious list.”

  Then she turned and crossed toward the door.

  Nathan quickly retreated further down the hall, only to turn on his heel a moment later. Then he slowly walked back toward the solar to give the illusion that he had just arrived.

  Temperance froze when she saw him, her eyes wide and flooded with tears. She opened her mouth to speak but only a sob came out. Covering her face with her hands, she stormed past him.