Out of Silence

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Out of Silence Page 12

by Ruby Monroe


  As expected, Jason did not disappoint. He flew into a rage, and a huge physical and verbal fight ensued. She heard all about the things he had done for her in his mind.

  He shouted at her, “You’re an ungrateful useless bitch. How could you do this to your children? You’re abandoning them, and me. Don’t you care anymore? Who are you screwing? You must be seeing someone. I’ll have you followed. You won’t get a cent from me.”

  Interesting he accuses me of indiscretions. He’s the adulterer. Well, I guess that’s not totally true anymore.

  Ruby tried to ignore him. She calmly said, “Jason, I’m not leaving because of anyone except you.” Maybe he’s bluffing, I don’t know, but I am certain that I will not be deterred in my quest for freedom.

  He said, “Ha, ha, I knew you were getting ready to leave. If you know what’s good for you and your darling children, you’d be wise to reconsider your plans.”

  Ruby gathered her courage and, for the first time, stood her ground. She decided that she would no longer be intimidated by him. “Enough is enough. I will not be your personal punching bag any longer.” She was firm and didn’t back down this time. She used the advice that the lawyer had given her. She lied by telling him, “I have warned my boss, Mr. Wilson, that if I do not come to work, he should notify the police, as that will mean my husband has murdered me.”

  Jason momentarily stopped in his tracks, but not for long. He proceeded to shove her down eight stairs to the landing. She felt each step as it met with her shoulder, hips and head. On the landing, she appeared once again to be a pile of clothing waiting to be laundered, just lying there in a clump. She was bruised and hurt. His actions reinforced her need to leave. Nothing he did to her now would deter her. In fact, she was more dedicated than ever to her plan.

  Actually, his actions just made her stronger-willed and more adamant. This time she was really leaving. She wanted to do the right thing, for her, for the first time in her married life.

  The next morning, he changed his tactic. He decided to beg. He pleaded, “Please stay at least until Christmas is over. Think of the kids. What kind of Christmas will it be for them if you aren’t here? Ruby, don’t be selfish. Think of someone other than yourself for a change.”

  Ruby watched him carefully. What’s he up to now? Is this his new game? Ruby had to always be on guard when he swiftly changed his approach. She didn’t trust him.

  Jason said, “As usual, we’ve already invited my mom and dad for Christmas dinner, plus two of my brothers and their wives. Please don’t spoil my parents’ Christmas too. Let’s keep this as our little secret for now, shall we?”

  I get it! He doesn’t want anyone to know that I’m planning on leaving him or why.

  “You know I love your parents very much. I wouldn’t do anything to make them unhappy. Okay, I’ll stay, but only until Christmas is past,” she said, reluctantly agreeing to postpone her move out.

  She had always wondered if he was so ashamed of his behaviour it would be easier for him if she was dead and couldn’t tell anyone.

  He asked, “Why spoil everyone else’s Christmas just because you’re being so selfish?”

  There’s the real Jason. His true colors are showing again. She was determined to not be fazed by this complete about-face attitude. Once she agreed to stay, he turned nasty. She could have predicted this without a crystal ball. What he didn’t know was that she had rented an apartment starting January first. She couldn’t leave until January anyway. But she’d let him beg. It looked good on him. She felt like she had gained strength and there was a strong wind at her back pushing her in the right direction—away from him.

  She knew he realized that he wouldn’t be able to talk her out of leaving or plead with her not to throw away their twenty-two years of marriage. Throw it away? Who is he kidding? Nothing, except the children, about this marriage is worth keeping. Watching him change, she realized that he had come to terms with the truth: brutality wasn’t going to win this battle of wills.

  He said, “Look, I’m trying to be the rational person here. I will not try to stop you from moving in January if you agree to stay here over the holidays.”

  But he had lied so often before, she just didn’t believe him anymore. She would be a fool to fall for his game. She reconsidered only because he did have a point: why spoil Christmas for everyone else, including mom and dad Monroe and Jason’s brothers and sisters-in-law. They, to her knowledge, knew nothing about the abuse she had suffered. If she spoiled the holidays, then she felt like she would become the bad person. If she stayed, her secret was safe.

  “Okay. I’ll agree to stay.” She hoped this would stop his verbal and physical attacks on her. What he still didn’t know, and she would not tell him, was that she had to stay until New Year’s Day. She had nowhere to go until then. His lack of this knowledge had given her a bargaining chip she hadn’t realized she had. She could actually openly pack boxes now. One for Ruby! She secretly congratulated herself with a glass of wine.

  The week after Christmas was a week from hell, with constant bullying, pushing and shoving. His attitude got uglier by the day. He forced her to have unprotected sex several times, even though he still had herpes. He raped her again and again almost daily for the whole week. Her vagina was raw from the lack of lubrication and the rough penetration. He didn’t even bother to call it making love anymore.

  They constantly fought over the least little issue. For the first time, she saw his desperation and vulnerability.

  She prayed she could survive just one more week. She could not wait to get out of this house and away from him forever. She tolerated his abusive behaviour. She became submissive and didn’t fight back. He became less abusive, as if he knew he had won or lost the battle.

  Chapter 25

  1979: Moving Day

  She had secretly booked a moving van for Monday, January 6, at 9:00 a.m. She knew he would leave for work long before that time. He didn’t know when she was actually planning to move out. It was possible he’d convinced himself that he had intimidated her enough, and she would be too afraid of his threats and therefore too fearful to move out.

  She had previously gathered Matt and Joey together for a secret meeting. She swore them to secrecy and explained her need to move out before something terrible happened. Ruby pledged her love to them and offered to take them with her to her new home. The boys, disgusted with their father’s behaviour, had moved out of the house long before.

  The Friday afternoon just before her planned move, Ruby was on her way to a meeting with the manager of accounting when she saw George walking toward her in a secluded corridor that ran next to his office. She grinned when she announced, “I’ve rented an apartment and booked the moving van. I’m moving out this coming Monday morning. My emotions are running the whole gamut. I’m ecstatic, hesitant, nervous and frightened that Jason will try to stop me.” She paused long enough to catch her breath and then continued, “If all goes as planned, I will be arriving at my new place just before noon on Monday. I just so want to be free of him.”

  “Slow down,” he said as he smiled back at her with that oh-so-familiar twinkle in his gorgeous blue eyes. He could see the happiness and relief in both her eyes and her face. He was pleased for her and said, “Ruby, that’s great news. I know this is a major step for you. Let me know if you need any help. I’m here for you. What’s your new address?”

  “150 Grayson Drive, apartment 506.”

  George cautioned her, “Please be very careful and please call the police at the first sign of trouble. Do not wait. Maybe if he hears that the police are responding, he’ll back off.”

  Ruby’s heart skipped a beat when she saw the moving van pull into the driveway. She worried, What if Jason plans to return home and catch me in the act of moving? My stomach’s in knots. My chest is tight. I can’t breathe. Pull yourself together, girl. You can have a panic attack la
ter.

  With hurried commands, she instructed the movers, “Load the dining room and living room furniture and the master bedroom suite first.”

  “Ms. Monroe, are there cartons and clothing?” the movers asked.

  “Of course, but load all of the packed cartons after the furniture. There’s nothing breakable in the cartons—just linens, towels and kitchen necessities. But I want everything out of the house first, please.”

  Everything was brought to the driveway and loaded into the van. Ruby gave orders like a drill sergeant. Panic will do that to the best-laid plans.

  When the truck was packed and only then did she divulge the address of her new home. Relieved and elated that she had succeeded in the first lap of the move, she drove the car that she had been relegated to drive—a small four-cylinder gray Pinto—to her new home. Jason drove the big newer Country Squire station wagon. It just didn’t matter, because she was finally going to be free of him.

  Meanwhile, at 150 Grayson Drive, Ruby’s new apartment building, George was waiting impatiently. He paced back and forth in the lobby, worried that Ruby’s husband would try to stop her from finally being free. George checked his image reflected in the mirrored wall. Since his separation, he had lost at least twenty pounds. Now his six-foot frame was more slender, and his clothes fit way better. This pleased him, as he thought he looked healthier. Also, his cheeks were less chubby without those extra pounds. He hoped Ruby would agree with his self-assessment. A closer look at his hair convinced him that he had a few more gray hairs interspersed in his full head of curly dark brown locks. He was sure it was mostly due to the stress of his separation.

  Ruby arrived just before the moving van. He watched her confidently walk across the parking lot toward the lobby. He had worried for her safety. He was afraid that her husband would follow through with his threats to do her harm. Shaking his head, he realized he couldn’t even say the words—kill her. George had a soft spot for a professional well-put-together woman, especially Ruby. He still found her very attractive. Most of all, he loved her smile. He liked that her whole face always lit up whenever she saw him.

  He greeted her with a smile, a big warm bear hug and a bouquet of flowers. George’s, smiling face shouted his happiness at seeing her. “Here, welcome to your new home,” he said, bowing while handing her the colourful spray of flowers. “Handyman George, at your beck and call. I’m here to help you settle into your new place. I hope you don’t mind,” he added with his most charming smile.

  Ruby hugged him back and said, “Thank you, George. You are so thoughtful.” She smiled to herself and thought, I don’t even know if I brought a vase with me. She mentally shook herself, because that didn’t matter. She was finally free. “Your offer of assistance is perfect and very much appreciated. I know I can find something for you to do,” she added with a playful smile and a come-on twinkle in her eyes.

  Yes, George, I know what I would like to do with you. Just thinking about finally being able to be with him made her tingle in the most delicious way.

  George and Ruby worked very hard for several hours placing the furniture around the apartment as the movers carried the pieces in from the truck. They unpacked several cartons she’d secretly filled with household items she wanted to bring with her and had stored in the garage until today. Ruby had brought sufficient necessities to make her kitchen and bathroom functional.

  “George, would you please make the bed while I put the dishes in the cupboard? I think I’ll feel more settled with fewer boxes stacked against the wall.” She knew that she must keep her mind on unpacking for a little while longer. It was getting harder and harder to ignore her desire to tackle him in the bedroom. What a great opportunity. No, wait. It will be perfect. She just knew.

  When they had finally finished putting everything in place, they were exhausted from the physical labour. Ruby suggested, “I think we should have something to eat.” Unfortunately, the one thing she hadn’t brought was food. She thought about going food shopping.

  “Let me go to the mall across the street and pick up some takeout food.” George gave her a sweet little peck on the cheek and then hurried off to find food.

  Ruby raised her hand and touched her cheek, remembering the kiss. “George, hurry back, please.” She had plans for him this evening. She really hoped that he had the same plans for her. It would be so nice to actually make love with someone she wanted to be with. No more unwanted brutal forced sex for her.

  When he returned, he was grinning from ear to ear. He held up his right hand, which held a liquor store bag, and said, “Look what I found.” His left hand held a fast-food paper bag containing burgers and fries. He placed the food on the table. Then, ceremoniously, with a bow and a wave of his hand across his chest, in a form that most butlers would be proud of, he removed the bottle of wine from the bag that was in his other raised hand. He found a corkscrew, which he used to open the wine. He searched until he found a couple of wineglasses, poured the wine and then offered Ruby a glass.

  They ate their burgers and fries, chatting while eating and drinking as if they were old comfortable friends. With help of the wine, the mood turned electric, with vibes being sent with shy but sensual looks. Their tingling longing for each other’s bodies was kept in check, as the anticipation was mixed with the unknown. This would be their first sexual encounter. It was as frightening as it was anticipated. Neither one knew what to expect from the other. She had wished for this day and fantasized how he would react. I hope George wants me as much as I want him. Neither one had any idea of what the reality of their encounter would be.

  The conversation was filled with innuendo and suggestive comments. They flirted and gently touched when passing by or handing the other a replenished glass of wine. This playful behaviour helped break down the barriers that had been erected over the past months. Ruby was ready to play out her dreams of how this intimate moment would culminate. I hope George is using the same playbook as me. If not, I think I might just explode.

  The only calmness in the room was the carefully chosen soft music on the stereo. They so enjoyed their picnic that evening and each other’s company.

  Ruby giggled like a schoolgirl in anticipation of what she hoped would come. The wine helped her ever-increasing horny mood. She was so happy to be with George in her new home. She was so very relaxed and aroused at the same time—never forgetting she was free at last.

  They didn’t know if it was the sense of joy or freedom, but the long-suppressed feelings exploded. Maybe it was the wine, or perhaps the sexual attraction and desire were always there. They didn’t know or care. The atmosphere around them was charged. They both felt it.

  It started with a little teasing, then flirting, which developed into gentle play slapping. It was like this frisky behaviour ignited the flame that had been smoldering just below the surface all day long.

  Ruby coyly suggested, with an obvious grin that revealed her motivation, “I should have a shower to remove the grime and sweat from today’s physical labour. Lugging boxes and moving furniture around all day only made it worse.” She walked toward the bathroom. Looking back over her shoulder, she pinched her nose with two fingers to reinforce her statement that she thought she smelled bad.

  George smiled in agreement. Ruby had no doubt about his desire to finally make mad passionate love to her. She watched as he wiggled and adjusted himself, making room in his pants for his much-enlarged penis, which she was looking forward to enjoying.

  With highly aroused sexual feelings, Ruby hurried to the bathroom and stripped down. She dropped the soiled clothes from her tingling body in a pile in the middle of the bathroom floor. Stepping into the very warm invigorating shower, she was amazed at how sensuous the jets of water felt on her aroused breasts. Everything around her was sensual. Wow! I’m so horny. I need to fuck him soon—very soon. I am going to come on my own if I wait very much longer.

 
Standing there in the shower with her eyes closed and her imagination in high gear, she enjoyed the feeling of the warm water washing over her aroused body. Her thoughts were interrupted by the sound of the shower curtain being slowly pulled back, exposing George and his beautiful engorged penis as he entered the shower.

  “Oh! How wonderful! Please join me,” she said, smiling with the imagined pleasure that this wonderful member would provide. Ruby turned her face up to him and tilted her head back to look into his handsome face. She was searching for and then accepted his delicious tongue into her welcoming mouth.

  He took her face in his hands and kissed her forehead, cheeks and finally her mouth ever so gently, then her eyelids and back to her hungry waiting mouth and tongue. Ruby sensually ran her hands over his firm wet body, exploring parts that she had previously only imagined. She waited as long as she could, and then she intentionally found his large erection. As expected, it was a mind-blowing turn on. Their bodies were writhing with passion and desire for each other.

  The shower was small and felt too restrictive and awkward to complete their lovemaking. Without speaking, they both stepped out of the shower, wrapped in each other’s arms. Shuffling in unison and dripping wet—and leaving moist foot marks and small puddles everywhere in their path—they stumbled their way to the bedroom, never missing a beat nor breaking contact. Wrapped in each other’s arms, they passionately kissed, caressed and touched each other, hungry for satisfaction and eagerly wanting each other and the culmination of their desire.

  Neither one wanted to participate in much foreplay, as they had waited close to six months to have each other, and have each other they did. George couldn’t wait any longer. He wanted her and wanted to give her his best. In seconds, moving in unison, their worlds exploded.

  Ruby’s orgasm was like lifting her mind, body and soul up—up—up into space, taking her breath away. She gasped for air but didn’t want to breathe for fear she would lose the momentum. Still holding her breath, she waited to reach the top … soon now … soon … almost there … then there was a most amazing explosion inside her that sent her to the most astounding heights, with that special spot at the top of her vagina pulsating and pulsating. The sensation was so strong it seemed to lift her head off the bed.

 

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