I swear my phone weighed more than a boulder at that moment. My heart fell out of sync as I unlocked the screen and swiped to the messages.
Ambrose: In fourth grade, Chrom convinced me that he could shoot energy blasts from his hands like a cartoon character. He led me on for a whole school year while I waited to see it in action before admitting it was all bullshit. I bribed him with a pack of Skittles and swore him to secrecy.
“Well?” Danika prompted. “What did he say?”
“Something...embarrassing,” I murmured, reading the message again. “But kind of sweet?”
Danika grinned broadly. “Great, because I’m going to be expecting daily updates.”
“Updates on what?”
She leaned her head on Carter’s shoulder, smile never slipping. “On him winning you back, obviously. This is like...my favorite part.”
“You do realize that my life isn’t a romcom?”
“You’re saying that”—her head bobbed to one side and I followed the indication—”but I don’t think they got the memo.”
My eyes landed on the tv again. Chrom was still on screen, helmet cradled under his arm. Two words were written along the side of it in bold, unmistakable sharpie.
Forgive him.
I covered my face as a hot blush scalded my cheeks and my friends laughed at me.
I’d claimed this would be a war, so I should’ve predicted that Ambrose was not going to play fair...
40
Emily
A week went by and the texts from Ambrose didn’t stop.
I’d expected them to, especially after our awkward encounter in Film class Monday.
Seeing as there was no way in hell I could sit beside him and pretend everything was okay, I’d picked a seat at the front of the room, stayed attentive the entire time, and swiftly grabbed my stuff and dashed away like a mad-woman at the first available opportunity.
Of course, even the limited amount of time I’d spent looking at him was enough to devastate me.
There’d been dark bags under his eyes, and his usual menacing aura had been twice as strong as usual. Those nearly black eyes had met mine the moment I walked in, and I could still remember the flash of determination before I set about my task of ignoring him.
Yet he hadn’t given up on sending me random little details about his life, things he claimed—and I believed—he’d never told anyone before.
I read another one while I headed to my favorite bench close to the culinary class. Baron had shown up outside the dorm yesterday to put an app on my phone. He’d guaranteed that the microphone he installed wouldn’t be found unless Chef Stone knew exactly what she was looking for. Then he’d walked away before I could question his change of heart where I was concerned.
Ambrose: The day you squished that cupcake into my t-shirt was one of the best days I’ve ever had. You didn’t make a big speech or even seem to care that I didn’t recognize you immediately. You just acted. I knew then I was going to have my hands full, even if I never admitted it.
Another crack in my heart sealed together as I sat down, grinning to myself. Since the other day, I’d learned more about Ambrose than I ever thought there was to know.
He was afraid of clowns, couldn’t swim, burned if he didn’t wear sunscreen at all times, and hated the taste of dark chocolate.
That last one was something I had half a mind to try and change, but that would be giving in and doing what he wanted. I knew what he was up to. Ambrose was making a point of being an open book to earn himself brownie points where I was concerned.
I couldn’t say it wasn’t working, but I wasn’t wholly convinced either.
My fingers hovered over the screen. I hadn’t replied to anything so far, but the need to was killing me slowly. I missed our banter. I missed giving him shit when he got obsessed with whatever movie we were watching.
I missed...us, and the longer we spent apart, the more I worried that my fear of being a pushover that went crawling back to a liar would be the actual issue that separated us for good.
If I kept giving him the cold shoulder with nothing else to go on...how long before he gave up completely?
Isn’t that what you want? the fear whispered.
But it wasn’t.
Not anymore.
Me: I hope that shirt never came clean. It’ll teach you not to disrespect cupcakes in the future.
Ambrose: There she is. I was starting to worry I had the wrong number. That was going to be a bitch to explain.
Me: Is it too late for a: new phone, who dis?
Ambrose: I miss you.
If there had been a speaker connected to my chest, a new sound would’ve been born that day. It was what it sounded like when a heart exploded with sparkles, confetti, and prancing unicorns that had tails made of rainbows.
Wiggling my toes beneath me in pure happiness, I worried at my lip for a moment.
Me: You shouldn’t have lied.
Ambrose: I know, Cupcake. Now admit that you miss me too. My ego feels like it’s gone ten rounds in the ring with Mike Tyson and I could really use a win right now.
Me: Didn’t I tell you not to call me that? I think you just signed yourself up for round eleven.
Ambrose: There’s only ten rounds.
Me: Not. My. Problem. And class is starting, I have to go.
Ambrose: I’m getting you back. Don’t make me wait until you become a chef.
I put my phone down to keep myself from answering again. That didn’t stop the smile on my face from spreading so wide it was painful. I probably looked like a crazy person sitting alone with a giant grin on my face and I did not give a single fuck. Even when Chef Stone’s voice came through the speaker and I started taking notes, my good mood stayed firmly in place.
For the next hour, I was the best student I could be without an oven or any actual ingredients or utensils to work with. When she would give people time to prepare what they were making, I’d close my eyes and do my best to picture the scene like it was a virtual reality class. It helped more than I expected, and I made a note to consider that for next time.
Technology could accomplish some amazing things, and if it got me closer to my end goal, there wasn’t much I refused to take a chance on.
As Chef Stone began her closing statements for the day, someone tapped me on the shoulder.
Despite being able to hear that the imposing chef remained in the classroom and hadn’t caught onto me again, I almost screamed.
Then my lungs froze when I saw who was hovering over me.
The black hoodie, shades, and pulled-down hat mostly hid her features from view, but it couldn’t completely hide the scars around her lips that pulled one side into a permanent grimace.
Kaylee Vandyke, in the flesh.
She lifted her hand in a wave. “Hey. Sorry to drop in on you like this, but a little birdie told me I might find you here.”
“You were— You were looking...for me?”
There. That was almost a sentence.
The functional corner of her mouth curled in a grin. “Unless you have a twin that threw up in my stairwell.”
I cringed, my entire face scrunching together in embarrassment. “Oh, God. I’m really, really sorry about that. I was...overwhelmed.”
Her shoulders lifted and fell. “I’m just giving you a hard time, it’s not like I had to go out there and clean it.”
I rubbed at the goosebumps on my arm, looking around. Obviously, she wasn’t actually a ghost, but she’d been one for years. I didn’t understand why she was standing in front of me instead of literally anyone else.
“This is weird, isn’t it?” she asked. “I probably should’ve called or something first, but I didn’t want to waste time. Speaking of which, would you mind walking with me? I can explain, but there’s something else I don’t want to miss either.”
Dumbfounded, I nodded and got up, slinging my backpack over one shoulder.
She headed toward the building I’d been kick
ed out of, and I debated what was happening here before falling into step at her side.
Contrary to what I might’ve thought given the in-disguise attire she’d chosen, Kaylee didn’t walk like she had anything to hide. She kept her head up, each step steady and even. When people took greater notice of her and her scar, she didn’t shy away from their gazes or lose her cool. For all intents and purposes, she was just a normal girl walking around campus. But I knew better.
This girl was important enough for Ambrose to alienate everyone else around him. That made her somebody I needed to pay special attention to.
“Let me guess,” she said, “he didn’t tell you what went down yet?”
I rolled my head from side to side. “Kind of? I didn’t really give him a chance.”
“Understandable. For what it’s worth, I think he would’ve come clean about the whole thing before long. I just happened to choose a bad time to make my own moves. I don’t have the reach that he does, so I didn’t know you were a factor until it was too late.” She looked at me and shook her head. “The look on his face when he realized you’d been at the apartment. I’ve known that boy since we were kids and I’ve never seen him look so defeated. He has got it bad for you.”
He’s not alone there, I thought, but kept my lips sealed.
Tragic past aside, she was a new player. I could have empathy for what she’d been through without trusting her. And right now, I had no reason to believe a word she said.
I cleared my throat. “How did you two go from friends to...”
It seemed inappropriate to point at her face.
She did it for me.
“This?” She stashed her hands back in her hoodie pocket. “It’s not that scandalous. We were on the mountain. I made a bet with Ambrose that I could make another circuit around the trail we liked to ride our bikes on faster than he could. What I didn’t take into account was the rain and how slippery the trail would be.” She grimaced, shoulders tensing. “We were neck and neck going around a bend when things started to get...iffy.
“Ambrose slowed down and warned me to do the same, but you have to understand. He always won. Always. As ridiculous as it sounds in hindsight, I saw that day as my opportunity to finally win and rub his face in it. When we got back to the others, I could wear the crown of defeating the undefeatable and have bragging rights forever. So, I sped up.”
She paused outside the building right as some of the other students pushed through the doors. A few of them noticed me and gave me looks I didn’t bother reading into. The ones that spotted Kaylee drew their brows together but kept walking.
When she didn’t say anything else right away, I shifted on my feet. Finally, she blew out a breath and huddled deeper into her hoodie.
“The rest is a bit of a blur,” Kaylee said. “I hit something, and the next thing I knew I was dangling over the edge. Somehow, Ambrose had caught up and managed to grab my arm. Lord knows he tried as hard as he possibly could to pull me back up, but like I said, we were kids. We’d already been exhausted before we decided to go on that last run. He couldn’t lift me by himself from that angle, and there was no one around to help.”
“You fell,” I whispered, heart clenching for what must have been a traumatic moment for both of them.
Erik and I had our differences, but I couldn’t imagine seeing him fall over a cliff. The thought of it alone sent a terrified shiver skittering along my limbs. No wonder Ambrose didn’t want to talk about this. No wonder his voice had been so wounded when he tried to bring it up the other night.
He blamed himself.
Kaylee nodded. “I fell. After that, I don’t remember much of anything other than the pain and a few fragments of Ambrose carrying me down the other side of the mountain until he could call our parents. I had an infection by the time I reached the hospital, and while that more than the fall, nearly killed me, it also meant there was nothing that could be done for this”—she waved at the scarred side of her face—”until I was over it. And by then, I was a lost cause.”
I picked at the polish on my nails. “What about plastic surgery?”
“Let me clarify.” She opened the door and ventured into the building with me hot on her heels. “The doctors wanted to try plastic surgery, but it was going to cost a fortune and they told me I’d never get rid of all the scars. Still, I wasn’t a lost cause to them. My parents on the other hand were a different story.”
Pulling her to a stop again wasn’t something I consciously decided on doing. It just happened. “You can’t be serious.”
“Why wouldn’t I be?” A slight frown appeared before vanishing a moment later. “I’m not sure how much you know about the Tarots, but the name implies more mystical hooha than there actually is. The aspects we’re each supposed to embody are just a shiny coat of paint on a worthless vehicle that should’ve been taken off the road years ago. More than anything, it’s there to protect the status that they’ve built on the backs of those beneath them.”
She gently extracted my arm from hers and we continued down the hall.
“I was supposed to represent the Star.” Kaylee laughed, the sound light and...fake. “Hope and inspiration. But it’s a bit hard to make people feel inspired when you look like something from a freakshow, yeah? From the moment I got injured, I became a threat to my parent’s precious status. A daughter who can’t fill her role is useless. And just like that”—she shrugged—”they were done with me.”
We stopped outside of Chef Stone’s room. The door was closed, and a quick peek through the window showed the other woman packing up for the day. I already wasn’t on the best terms with her, but knowing how she’d treated her daughter? I was beginning to wonder if it wasn’t for the best that she’d kicked me out.
Kaylee looked through the window as well. Although I couldn’t read her expression, the tightness of her features told me that whatever thoughts were going through her head, they weren’t happy. How could they be?
Sure, my own parents weren’t shining examples of parental love, but they hadn’t done anything like this.
“Why are you telling me all of this?” I asked, realizing I should’ve probably led with that in the first place.
“Because I wanted to make sure you knew where things stood with Ambrose.” She captured my hand, giving it a quick squeeze before letting go. “I have so much love in my heart for that boy, but I’m about to put him in a bad spot. I’m about to put all of them in a bad spot, really. But if I’m being honest, he’s the only one I care about anymore.”
Come on, Fate. Can’t we get one little break from you? Just one? Is that so much to ask?
I took a step back from her. “What did the others do?”
Kaylee took off the dark shades. The good eye didn’t burn with hate or fury or grim determination. She looked completely at peace as she said, “They forgot about me. They all did. More than anything, the Tarots are supposed to be family. That’s been falling apart for longer than I’ve been alive. Mrs. LaCroix tried the hardest during her era, but even her might wasn’t enough to exorcise the rot.
“As for me...when you have nothing but time on your hands because your best friend is paying out of pocket for your continued existence, it puts things in perspective. It allows you to find out all sorts of things, like how my own parents wanted to ship me across the country—straight into exile—just to keep from looking at my face any longer. They purged me from their lives like I was nothing, so eager to be rid of me that they failed to consider I never left.”
She put the shades back on.
Knocked on the door.
Offered me another bright smile that didn’t translate into what I was pretty sure she was leading to.
“Just between us girls,” she said, “I’m going to tear the whole thing down. He’ll need you at his side when I’m done.”
The door opened.
Chef Stone opened her mouth, plainly intent on barking at whoever had interrupted her. Then she saw who it was.
Kaylee didn’t move as her mom’s features paled.
As the older woman’s knees trembled.
As she leaned against the doorframe and slid to the floor.
“How?” Chef Stone croaked from a throat full of gravel.
“How else, mother? Destiny.” Kaylee crouched long enough to pat her on the head like one would a child. “My enrollment starts with the New Year. I can’t wait for us to see so much more of each other!”
And with a skip to her step, she strolled back the way we’d come.
I couldn’t find any pity for the woman on the floor when she looked up at me.
But it was more than the chill in the air that froze my bones when I left her there.
41
Emily
“Wakey, wakey eggs and vodka!” Renata sang, pushing at my shoulders.
I rolled over on the bed, swatting at her as she danced out of reach. “The one day I want to sleep in and you’re up bright and early?”
The weekend couldn’t have come fast enough after that entire mess with Kaylee. I hadn’t been able to keep myself from texting Ambrose to give him an idea of what was going on, but his response had seemed...distracted at best.
And he’d followed it by spilling another secret about how he’d found the guy who tried to dance with me at the first party and threatened him with bodily harm if he ever thought about touching me again.
Which was...a little hot and a little scary, but didn’t really make me feel better about how things were going to go from there.
Then again, was it really my problem what happened with the Tarots? I wasn’t one of them.
Keep telling yourself that. Maybe you’ll actually believe it before the sun winks out.
“I’m not singing for your ass again, bitch.” Renata shoved me harder and I almost fell off the bed. “Get your ass up. My eggs are getting cold, and I was only partially joking about the vodka. I haven’t had a drop of alcohol in about...thirty-six hours. You don’t want to drive me to drink, do you?”
Defiant Prince: An Enemies-to-Lovers Romance (Black Rose University Book 1) Page 38