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Snap

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by robert renshaw


SNAP

  10 minute Stage Play for 2 actors.

  Man: 25-30 years old: Scruffy, Confident and Soft drug user.

  Dressed: A Towel

  Woman 40-50: Stylish, Business type. Edgey. Manic Personality.

  Dressed: Plain business clothes.

  Set: An Apartment lounge room at midday.

  Props: (1) Table (1)Chair (1) Latex made severed female head .Latex penis.

  (1) Blood stained satin dress over decapitated foam body (1) imitation window opening. A drug bong , and a large meat cleaver. Box Condoms

  Synopsis

  A woman returns home from getting the sack at work to find her live in lover asleep and a street hooker going thru her bathroom cosmetics, she has decapitated the hooker in a fit of rage.

  Opening Scene

  Setting up; SFX: Marian Faithful “Why did you do it” 1min.

  LFX: Lights up

  The woman stands motionless. In her left hand she holds the blood covered severed head of the hooker at shoulder height. The right hand a bloody meat cleaver.

  The man stumbles as if coming out of a drugged stupor into the room to be confronted by the horrific scene.

  WOMAN

  (Holding up the head)

  Looking for this?

  MAN

  (Still semiconscious)

  What the fuck has happened?

  WOMAN

  I don’t remember her, is she the Avon lady? Or maybe the local window cleaning woman I mean we are Thirty fucking floors up!

  MAN

  What the fucks happened?

  WOMAN

  I know, she is your newest little friend, your buddy, Pal, Mate and I have broken her. Oh dear! Maybe if I go into the kitchen and get some needle and thread you can sew her back together, is that what you want to do? Sew her all nice and neatly up, is it? Is it? You!

 

  MAN

  WHAT THE FUCK HAPPENED? FUCKKKKKKKKKKK!

  WOMAN

  Seems like her and I, Um! What should I call her? I mean we are getting to know each other, we should be formally introduced honey would you like to introduce us?

  MAN

  What the fuck are you talking about what did you do?

  WOMAN

  Her name darling, her first name, we must be introduced.

  Now Sweety, tell me your little friends, fucking name!

  MAN

  Oh! you sick twisted bitch, what are you on? What name?

  WOMAN

  Ok! You don’t know her name, I am sure you would have made her name top priority when you engaged in the transaction on the street, I mean that’s where you found her isn’t it? On the street outside, when you went to buy some drugs today? On the very street we live on where everyone I know see’s you, every day buying deals and conning tricks out of hookers, while I go to work.

  MAN

  I don’t know what your (beat).

  WOMAN

  Cinnamon that’s it we will call her Cinnamon

  (Holding the head and smiling sneeringly hello)

  Hi! Cinnamon, honey, you don’t look so good is that why when I came in today early, I found you trying on all my makeups and filling your bag with my expensive underwear and perfumes, honey? Did that make you feel better? And then I have, well I have ruined it. Look at the makeup. Really I do think she was a bit heavy with the lips

  (Showing the man the face)

  She does have pretty eyes

  (Stroking the eyeballs with her fingers)

  And she has, Oops, had a spectacular figure.

  (Kicking the blood covered foam filled dress)

  But these lips they don’t seem right! Tell me had she had any work done? You know, Tits, Arse, Pussy any plastics baby? Please tell me I really want to know.

  MAN

  What? What are you saying? Look, come here sit down. Put the head on the floor, come chat to me I will put the kettle on and let’s just relax.

  (To Self)

  Jezz, I hope this is a fucking dream, that dealer said whatever happens don’t get upset or any problems will freak you out… this is freaking me out. No it’s a dream. I will go along with it till I come out of it, I will come out of it won’t I?

  WOMAN

  No you won’t! Not this dream honey, now about that cuppa, later baby. Tell me does she have any new additions, I mean she must have had something to make you go out into the cold light of day, to spend my hard earned money on a dirty street slut! Oops! Sorry, Cinnamon it’s just I am a little annoyed today, shit wonder if my periods are due? What do you do when you have your rags on Cinnamon? Jezz, I hope you don’t bleed like you do here what a fucking mess….Haaa, get it fucking mess…Haaa. Now tell me DOES SHE HAVE ANY NEW BITS? YOU! ARE STARTING TO ANNOY ME?

  MAN

  I don’t know, her tits I suppose, they were nice. I mean I did not really notice, I was stoned honey and it was cold and she wanted to get warm, I invited her up for a cuppa and to see the view, that’s it! to see the view that’s all, then she was weak and dizzy from not eating she said, and I think the height must have made her woozy, well you know me how I worry about sick people I made her lie down, she went to sleep and when I woke up she was ,um well you had, um, well I ,I don’t fucking know after I fell asleep what happened, but I swear on our love, I never had sex with that woman, not even a kiss. Honey, that is the truth.

 

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