The Pawn

by Aston, Alexa

  As much as he wished it, he could not go after Kate.

  Nicholas had never felt so helpless in his life.

  Chapter Twenty-Three

  “My lady. Wake up,” a voice insisted as someone gently shook her shoulder.

  Katelyn forced her eyes open. Her head pounded something awful and she shivered with cold. She’d fallen asleep in her wet clothing and it now weighed her down into the mattress.

  A large, warm hand pressed against her brow, causing her to shudder. “’Tis a fever you have.”

  She glanced up and saw the voice belonged to Alec, the kidnapper who was but a few years older than she was.

  “I’ll be back.”

  Closing her eyes again, her body trembled violently as chills rippled through her. She needed to remove her soaked cotehardie and smock but had no strength to do so. She lay still until Alec returned and fought to open her eyes once more.

  Errol Cummins now accompanied Alec. The laird hovered over her, touching her forehead with the back of his hand.

  “You’re right. She’s got a fever. We should send for a healer. She’s too valuable a hostage. I can’t afford to have her die on us.”

  Katelyn glared up at him, her head throbbing. “I don’t intend to die, Laird. I plan on returning to my husband and giving him a good dozen children.”

  The Scotsman’s lips twitched in amusement. “Still fiery, even in the grips of fever.”

  “You might recall that my mother was a healer,” Alec said. “I learned enough from her to care for Lady Katelyn.”

  “What needs to be done?” the older man demanded.

  “First, she’s chilled to the bone. She’ll need to be moved so she can be close to a fire though I doubt you’ll want her downstairs will all the men.”

  Katelyn remembered the group she’d seen on their arrival and wanted nothing to do with them.

  “Nay. Even sick, a woman this beautiful would be too much temptation to dangle before them. Take her to my chamber instead.”

  “I can set up a pallet for her near the fire. I still keep a few herbs on hand and will steep some in hot water.”

  “Go make your preparations then. I’ll stay with the lass until you return.”

  Alec left the room. Katelyn’s teeth began to chatter. Cummins took one of her hands in his large ones and rubbed it between them, trying to warm her, and then repeated his action with her other hand.

  Even through the fog of her fever, she knew this might be her last chance to plead her case to the laird and said, “I hope you considered what I mentioned before. I understand that you must ransom me but please—let it be an honorable transaction. Let me return to Nicholas. Do not harm him.”

  The Scotsman kept silent so Katelyn pressed on. “If you assist in killing the most powerful nobleman in all of Northumberland, you’ll have to live with the consequences. Is it worth plunging into a war again with England?”

  Cummins looked down on her, lines of worry creasing his brow.

  “I don’t know what kind of bargain you struck with Bryce but his word is worthless. Cut your ties with him before he makes a fool of you in front of your men. Send a missive to Nicholas at Northmere. Get me home to my husband and be happy with the gold you’ll earn from him.”

  The laird studied her a long moment. “You love him? Lord Nicholas?”

  Katelyn’s eyes welled with tears. “I do. Very much. Did you love your wife?”

  He shook his head. “My father arranged the marriage. In the five years we were wed, we spoke little. I knew nothing of her, even though she bore me three bonny lasses.”

  Katelyn took his wrist, her fingers tightening around it. “I am sorry. I hope one day you will find a woman you can love and receive her love in return.”

  Cummins grunted, the look on his face telling her he had no belief in love. Her fingers fell away. She’d used the last of her strength. Her eyes closed again.

  A shuffling noise awoke her and someone said, “I’m ready to move her.” Strong arms lifted her, carrying her from the bedchamber and across the hall. Alec placed her in a chair and held her steady when she began to sway.

  “I’ll leave you to care for her,” Cummins said. “Remember how valuable she is, Alec. I’m counting on you to make her well again.” He exited the room.

  “My lady, I want you to drink this.”

  Alec lifted a wooden bowl to her lips. She was too tired to raise her hands to hold it herself so he held it for her. Bit by bit, she drank the fragrant brew in small sips until she emptied the bowl.

  “Very good. Now, we need to remove your clothes.”

  “Nay,” Katelyn protested feebly. No man had ever seen her unclothed, not even Nicholas, due to his blindness.

  “Don’t worry. I won’t hurt you,” he promised. “In fact, I won’t even notice. I don’t . . . feel that way. About women.”

  Gradually, he worked off her clothes and wrapped her in a soft blanket before lifting her from the chair and lowering her to a thick pallet on the floor. A fire crackled next to her. She desperately yearned for its warmth. Alec covered her with another blanket as she turned her face toward the flames.

  “Go to sleep, my lady. I’ll be here when you awaken.”

  *

  Katelyn gradually opened her eyes and the room came into focus.

  “Ah, you’re awake,” Alec said from the chair next to the bed she now lay in. He leaned toward her and felt her brow. “Cool to the touch. Your fever has broken. How is your head? You complained about it mightily.”

  She licked dry, cracked lips. “Better. It no longer aches.”

  He helped her to sit up, pillows propped behind her, and reached for a bowl sitting on the table. “Here, let’s get some broth in you. It will warm your belly.”

  It took her some minutes but she finished everything in the bowl.

  “How long have I been ill?” she asked. “My limbs feel as if I haven’t used them for a long time.”

  “Four days.”

  Katelyn frowned. “I remember you making me drink something several times. I seemed to fall asleep each time I did so.”

  “Some of the herbs I gave you were to reduce your fever and quell the pain in your head. Others did help you to sleep. Mother always said sleep was nature’s way to help someone recover from fever or an injury.”

  “You said your mother was a healer?”

  “Aye. And English.”

  She smiled weakly. “That explains why your brogue isn’t nearly as thick as the others. I can understand you much better than them.”

  A shadow crossed his face. “It’s what keeps me from being a true Scot,” he said bitterly.

  “Merely because your mother was English?”

  “There’s enmity between all Englishmen and Scots.”

  “Then how did your mother marry your father?”

  “She was caught up in one of the border raids,” he explained. “Usually, those are to gain livestock. Occasionally, a woman or child is brought back. No good usually comes of it. But Father was taken with her and insisted upon wedding her. It made him an outcast among his own people and left her with no one but him. And me.”

  “I’m sorry,” Katelyn said. “It seems so unfair. Are you still close to them?”

  “Father died the year I turned nine. Mother passed the following year. Errol took me in after that. As laird, ’tis his duty to look after his people.” He sighed. “It made no difference. People judge me because of my mother’s blood.”

  “You’re a grown man,” she said. “I’m surprised after so many years, you would still be considered an outsider in the land of your birth.”

  Alec shrugged. “’Tis the way of the Scots. They’re an untrusting lot to begin with.”

  “You’re alone then? No friends at all?” she asked gently.

  “Nay.”

  She hesitated a moment and then ventured, “You said before that you didn’t feel that way. About me.” She paused. “About women. Is that the true reason why
you’re not accepted?”

  He blew out a long breath. “I didn’t think you’d recall that. You seemed delirious to me by that point.” His eyes filled with pain. “Please, don’t mention what I said to the others. If they knew that . . .” His voice trailed off.

  Katelyn was unsure of what he meant. “I don’t understand. Please, tell me. I want to help you. You’ve been kind to me.”

  Alec shook his head. “I’m not like other men. You’re wed. You’ve kissed your husband. Lain with him.”

  She nodded, thinking how she missed her daily dose of kisses from Nicholas.

  “I have no desire to do that with a woman. I wish I could do it with a man.”

  She tried to mask her surprise. “I didn’t know that was possible.”

  He snorted. “Neither did I. I always felt different. Not like others. I couldn’t understand why. Finally, after my father died, I admitted it to my mother.” He raked a hand through his unruly hair. “She told me her brother was that way. That she’d caught him kissing another boy when they were young. He begged her not to tell anyone. She didn’t. Not even on the day he wed a girl from their village. Two days later, Mother was taken and never saw her family again.”

  Katelyn took his hand and squeezed it. “You must feel very alone, Alec.”

  “Alone. And ashamed,” he admitted.

  “It is who you are, Alec. I’m not saying it’s something to flaunt in front of others. Obviously, they would not understand.”

  “They would kill me if they knew,” he muttered.

  Katelyn said soothingly, “Still, it is how you feel. Mayhap, you’ll find another man who feels the same as you do.” She released his hand, her heart aching for this handsome young man and the terrible secret he lived with.

  He changed the subject. “I’m sure you’ll be needing a bath to wash away the fever sweat. It’ll make you feel whole again, being clean.”

  Glancing down, Katelyn saw she wore a man’s shirt.

  Alec must have noticed her puzzlement and said, “’Tis an old one of the laird’s. I dried your clothes by the fire but it was easier to have you in one of Errol’s night shirts as I bathed your limbs, trying to bring your fever down.”

  He stood. “I’ll go downstairs and warm water for your bath.”

  “Could you bring me something to eat? I’m very hungry.”

  “I can do that.” He paused. “My lady, I beg you to keep our conversation between us.”

  “Of course, Alec. I would not see you harmed in any way. Especially since you have cared so well for me during my illness.”

  He left and she closed her eyes again. She’d never really been ill before and found that their simple conversation had worn her out.

  The next thing she knew, she heard water sloshing and watched as Alec poured buckets into a wooden tub in the far corner of the room.

  Seeing she was awake, he said, “We’ll get you clean first and then feed you.”

  “I don’t know if I have the stamina to walk across the room, much less bathe myself.”

  Alec emptied a final bucket into the tub. “That’s why I’m here to help, my lady.”

  “Please. Call me Katelyn. I haven’t been a lady for very long. It still sounds odd to my ears.”

  He helped her from the bed and let her lean heavily on him as he led her to the tub, lifting the laird’s night shirt from her. Offering her his hand, she stepped shakily into the bath, feeling awkward at first being naked in front of him. He seemed to think nothing of it and took over when she couldn’t lift a hand. Alec washed her hair and then lathered her entire body with a sweet-smelling soap that had a hint of mint in it before rinsing the suds away. He pulled her to her feet and wrapped her in a bath sheet before bringing her to sit in front of the fire.

  “Let me comb your hair before it gets tangled.”

  Katelyn’s limbs felt heavy and she relaxed as he worked a comb through her locks and then fanned her hair about her.

  “Stay here by the fire so your hair can dry. I’ll find a clean night shirt for you. No sense in putting your own clothes back on until you’re up and about.”

  She chuckled. “I’m so weak I couldn’t go anywhere.”

  “I’ll be back with food shortly,” he promised.

  She closed her eyes and basked in the warmth of the fire against her back, wondering how lonely Alec must have been his entire life. First, his family had been isolated from others merely because of his mother’s place of birth. Then, he’d lost both parents and come to live with the laird as a young boy. Last, he held no feelings toward women. She’d noticed he scrubbed her efficiently with no lewd looks. It musts be incredibly difficult to hide his feelings from the world, never having a friend to share anything with. The fact that he’d told her, a total stranger, revealed just how solitary an existence he led.

  Alec returned, bringing broth with bits of chicken floating in it and fresh bread. Katelyn insisted on feeding herself, knowing she needed to build her strength again.

  Because she needed to escape.

  As she ate, she asked, “Has the laird sent a missive regarding his ransom request?” wanting to know what had occurred while she’d been so ill.

  “Nay. He wanted to make sure you wouldn’t expire before he did. He and Bryce have argued about it several times. Bryce wants to send word to the English king and Lord Nicholas, trying to squeeze monies from them both. Errol favors ransoming you to your family at Northmere since it wouldn’t take months to receive payment.”

  Katelyn liked that Alec confided in her. Mayhap, he might be persuaded to help her when she attempted to flee.

  “Shouldn’t the laird have the final say? ’Twas his men who took me and his house I stay in.”

  Alec nodded. “He’s said as much to Bryce.”

  Suddenly, the door flew open. Errol Cummins entered the solar, with Bryce Mandeville close behind him.

  “You’re looking much better, Lady Katelyn,” the Scotsman commented. “I’ve looked in on you each day and today is the first one I see a marked improvement.”

  “I don’t remember much about the previous days. But I know without Alec tending to my health, I would not have recovered it.”

  Bryce appraised her, a lascivious look on his face. Katelyn realized she was still wrapped in the bath sheet and had nothing on beneath it. She tightened it about her.

  “Have her courses come?” he asked Alec.

  “Nay,” the younger man said, a blush staining his cheeks.

  “Let me know when they occur,” Bryce said and left the room.

  Cummins closed the door and came to face her. “I have thought long and hard about what you said, my lady.”

  Katelyn’s heart skipped a beat. “About trusting Bryce?”

  The laird nodded. “I’ve come to believe that the pact between us is one-sided and that Mandeville would probably not live up to his end of it.”

  “Thank you, Laird. You are showing great wisdom.”

  “He’s not to know,” Cummins shared. “I will send a missive to your husband in two days’ time. You should be blooming with good health by then and able to travel once more.”

  “Will you give Nicholas a place to meet and exchange me for the ransom?” she asked. “Even better, will you ask him to stay away and allow his knights to perform the trade? That way, Nicholas would not even be present and kept from danger.”

  “Nay, I will insist he come to handle the transaction—but instead of my men setting upon him as Bryce expects, I plan to hand his traitorous brother over to the earl.”

  Chapter Twenty-Four

  Nicholas sat numbly as the priest droned on during morning mass. Almost a week had passed since Kate had been taken. No word of ransom had been sent. At this point, he believed the kidnappers had bypassed him and taken their demands straight to the king, thinking they could claim more from the royal treasury than from a northern nobleman.

  Only a handful of men knew she was missing. Once Nicholas had seen Rafe Mandeville
through the gates of Northmere, he’d ridden to the rendezvous point where Gerald and the other soldiers awaited him. He briefly explained to the men why they could not go after Kate and begged them to maintain silence regarding her disappearance. He didn’t want anything to endanger her wellbeing.

  The days had passed as if he lived underwater, moving languidly, everything a blur. The one good thing had been naming Gerald as his new captain of the guard. Nicholas had met with all of his soldiers at one time, explaining that his uncle was being replaced. Gerald had proved a popular choice, already having the men’s respect for his fighting skills and even temper. Nicholas had watched the knight carefully as he led the training exercises in the yard and knew his decision had been a sound one.

  His thoughts returned to Kate. She would most likely feel abandoned by him and utterly alone in captivity. If the ransom demand did go to the king, it might be months before she would be released. First, the messenger would have to ride to the south and discover which of the palaces the royal court occupied and then gain an audience with the king, both of which could take some time. Then the monarch would need to decide whether or not he would meet the kidnappers’ price or if he would insist upon negotiating with them. Though Edward was known as a fair king, Nicholas had heard talk of how mercurial he could be. If the missive caught him at the wrong time, the king might wash his hands of Kate altogether.

  If not and Edward was willing to pay, it would still take time to gather the gold and journey with it back to Scotland. All the while, Nicholas would hang in limbo, having no idea where Kate was. That threatened to destroy him.

  Moreover, Edward might place the blame for Kate’s kidnapping at Nicholas’ door. He could easily require the Mandevilles to reimburse the royal treasury for whatever price was paid for Kate’s return. Even then, Edward could instruct for his soldiers to bring Kate back to the royal court instead of returning her to Northmere. Kate would tell her cousin that her husband demanded an annulment. Edward would see to it. Because of that, Nicholas might never even lay eyes on her again. The thought of losing her forever haunted him day and night.