by Alexia Purdy
Zena wrinkled her nose, but her eyes widened as she made an audible gasp. “Wait… I know I’ve seen these before!” She took the feather and placed both hands on the shaft before snapping it in two.
“What are you doing? We needed that.” I groaned but stopped my complaint when I saw her produce a tiny jewel from inside the thickened hollow point of the feather. “Wait... what is that?”
I glanced at Soap, but he shrugged, confirming that he wasn’t playing a trick on either of us right now.
“It’s a stone, just like the one I’m wearing. They come from angel wing feathers. That’s how people with the Sight are able to live with it. We wear these stones—”
“I know about the stones, but how did you know it was in there?” I asked.
“Only feathers fallen from angels have them.” She held out the tiny, jade-like stone for me to pluck off her palm and examine. The tiny rock was incredibly light, but the magic emanating from it was overwhelming, more than one would expect from such a minuscule stone. The feather must have inhibited the magic. I would have never guessed it had been hidden inside.
“Yeah, but how did you know it was in there?” Soap repeated my question, and Zena suddenly looked like she’d seen a ghost.
“Shoot. We weren’t supposed to talk about it at all.”
“What do you mean by that?” I handed it back to her, but she’d paled and had to sit back down.
“I—I mean… I haven’t seen feathers like these since I was a child. There was a place we—my parents and I—went when I was really small. It’s where my mother got this.” She pointed to the stone hanging from her neck. “It was far away, and we journeyed for what felt like an eternity back then. My father was still alive. He’s the one who showed us where to go if we needed one of these stones. I never saw an angel, but it was a small alcove in a high mountain. It was near a waterfall. They told me a story about the place.
“What sort of story?” I held the stone up to the light, noting how it seemed both opaque and translucent at the same time. There was strong magic here indeed.
“Well,” Zena sighed, closing her eyes as she strained to remember, “the story goes that angels went there to the alcove to drink from the water. While they were there, they would shed one feather for the ones cursed with the Sight. Only one each. There were several on the ground, and I remember picking one up because I felt compelled to do so. My father cracked it open and held out the stone that I now wear around my neck.”
I was as engrossed in her tale as Soap was, and I gave him a tentative glance, knowing we both had the same plan in our heads. “Zena,” I said, “this place where the feathers are… would you be able to find it again if you tried?”
“I was really young when my father took us there.”
“But can you remember the way?”
She bit her lip, chewing on it for a moment. “Yes. I think I could, but I don’t remember exactly where the mountain was. I know the place was above the fortress of a rare faery clan. We had to avoid them because they could set us humans on fire. It was also surrounded by these woods that were rumored to be haunted.”
I widened my eyes and peered over at Soap, whose own eyes were just as wide, as though he’d seen an apparition. “Soap? You all right, man?”
“I know where the mountain is.”
“Wait… what? How?”
He turned toward me and blinked. “Ilarial found me near the Teleen and Guildrin courts, and it’s where I spent most of my childhood to adulthood.”
“Where, exactly?” I was done guessing. If he was going to be cryptic, I was going to get violent.
“It’s near the Teleen Caverns. Right above them.”
“You mean the place where my sister almost died a couple of times?” I cringed. I didn’t really want to go to the Teleen Caverns again. The caves gave me the creeps, but it was Dylan’s and Soap’s hometown, so to speak. Maybe it was time to grab him or Nautilus for backup.
“Yes. The very one and the same.”
“Great,” I sighed, knowing this day was already going the way I didn’t want it to. “I guess we should get moving. We don’t want to go through the Haunted Forest at night.” The whole place gave me the creeps, and we were heading back to the start of it all. Oh, joy.
It was the last place I wanted to be. Shade had told me all about the Haunted Forest, the Teleen Caverns, and the psychotic dryad queen who lived in the Haunted Forest and had tried to kidnap Shade. I’d experienced firsthand the craziness of the Teleen people the last time Shade had almost died and had to tie herself to Corb, that infernal Ancient Winter King. The place spelled nothing but trouble. I wasn’t looking forward to heading back to Faerie so soon, but from the sound of things, that was exactly where we had to go.
Figures.
Chapter Seventeen
Soap
We needed backup, and the only place to go for that was none other than the Scren Palace. Peering around the main hall as everyone greeted one another again, I smiled stiffly. I had returned to the place where the woman who held my heart lived and ruled. Like Benton, I never got to stay there long. Traveling across the country and capturing Unseelie faeries was what I did best, and it helped keep my mind off things I couldn’t change. It was avoiding the inevitable, of course, but it was pathetic that no matter how hard I tried to avoid seeing her, I always ended up back at the palace like I was tethered to it.
We were there to pick up Nautilus, who readily agreed to take us to the Teleen Caverns. Despite my hesitation, I couldn’t wait to see Shade again. She wasn’t in the group greeting us at the entrance as we peeled off our traveling cloaks, packs, and dusty armor, but I could sense her presence like it was a part of my soul.
“Where’s Shade?” I asked the blur of servants taking our gear but received a myriad of shrugs in response.
“No idea, man,” Benton offered. “I’m sure she’s on her way or in the middle of something.” He threw me a knowing look. I turned away, plucking my thermos from my pack as an excuse. I didn’t want to see that look, the one that said, “Give it up; she’s taken.”
I felt my heart squeeze with disappointment as the crowd dispersed; Shade remained elusive. She was usually one of the first to greet us. It was odd, actually. The place was almost too quiet for my liking. Quiet, that is, until James came out to greet his brother. The little guy was growing like a weed, and his enthusiasm was quite contagious. I was happy to see his antics put a smile on Benton’s face.
Even though the guy was never too serious and tried to come off as pretty laidback, he didn’t often smile and kept a lot of thoughts and emotions to himself. I was relieved to note Sary’s absence, even though I knew she and Braelynn were at the palace. Seeing the Vyn princess would have plunged Benton into a deep depression, and it wasn’t easy pulling him out of that kind of mood.
It was similar to the way I felt every time I thought about Shade. Then I felt her presence. The moment she came walking into the foyer in her royal garb, her long dark hair flowing and her brilliant brown eyes shining, my inner turmoil was completely forgotten.
Pathetic, wasn’t I?
“Well, well. Look what the demi-fey dragged in.” Shade chuckled and waved me over to her. She didn’t have to ask twice; I was already at her side, scooping her off her feet and swinging her around like not a single day had passed since we’d loved one another. Even so, despite our mutual joy, there was distance between us, however slight.
“What’s going on, Soap?” And without fail, Dylan wedged himself between us, severing the warmth of Shade’s body against mine as he took her hand, and she stepped promptly away.
“Hey, Dylan.” I gave him a friendly shake of the hand, but his grip jabbed into my fingers enough for me to know he wasn’t happy. “We’re here to pick you up for a roam outside the castle walls.”
I winked and cracked a wide grin, exposing enough teeth to blind the entire hall. What had changed between us this time around? It had grown increasingly harde
r to talk to him. Not that I had ever cared for his friendship; I only wanted to be near Shade, and if it was going to be an issue between us, which apparently it was, I would be abandoning hope for any kind of kinship with Dylan. Shade was the only one I really cared about.
“Dylan, thanks for going on this mission and helping Benton and Soap. I knew I could count on you.” Shade slipped her arms around his waist, giving him a nuzzle that made my stomach turn.
I wondered if she’d added that last bit just as a reassurance to her husband. It dug into me like a thousand needles, sticking into every vital organ and pinning them like beetles to a specimen board. I wished I was the one being nuzzled by Shade.
But I wasn’t.
The somber thought caused me to look away and study the rush of servants filtering away and beckoning us to our rooms. Finding Benton across the way and regaling James with another adventure story, I meandered toward them, knowing I’d probably have more luck socializing there. At least Benton had his family. I didn’t even have that. No sisters, brothers, or even a mother or father. No one at all, really. I was absolutely lost in a room full of love, but I couldn’t help but wonder if there was someone out there missing me.
I could hear Dylan chatting with Shade, and I fought the urge to cringe as I glanced their way once more. “Well, you know these guys need some real guidance out there,” he said. “It’s not safe to go traipsing across the country all the time. Plus, it’ll give me a chance to see some old acquaintances and friends back home. It’ll be good to see it again without being on a mission to Queen Gretel.”
Shade nodded, giving her husband a tender smile and pushing locks of his hair behind his ears. It had been a long time since he’d banished himself, taking on the bind to Shade when Darren, his brother, had tried to kill her. He hadn’t been kind to Shade back then. In fact, he’d been a downright prick to her before he fell in love with her.
He’d cut his hair in mourning of the severed relationship with his brother, but it had grown back now. His hair was way past his shoulders, snaking down his back, dark and thick. She was obviously enjoying it as she stroked her lovely fingers through his locks. I subconsciously reached up to touch my own golden brown mane. I had tied some of it back but had braided a couple of locks, which hung loose. It was three quarters of the way down my back, long and smooth and in need of a gal to run her fingers through it. It brought back a bittersweet memory of Shade running her hands through my hair, just the way she was doing with Dylan.
The motion stung, and I had to look away as my heart ached at the memory. I had to stop this. I couldn’t breathe anymore; my chest seized, and the world spun. What was happening to me? I had never felt so desperate for air around Shade before, but now I felt like I couldn’t fill my lungs.
No air. No air at all.
“Hey man, you all right?” Benton leaned toward me, concern etched on his face. “You look a bit green.”
“I’m fine. I’m going to catch a siesta, as the Spanish call it. I’m exhausted.”
He nodded, but his scrutinizing look told me he didn’t believe a word I’d said. No matter. I was already rushing out of the main foyer and down the hall to the guest room that belonged to me. It was always the same room, saved for my own personal use. It was a gift yet a curse to have such a place so close yet so distant from Shade’s embrace.
Was this how it would feel from now on around her? Would I have to avoid her at all costs? Always alone for all of time? I was part changeling, like Shade. I could transform into anything I wanted. Right now, I wanted to change into something that could fly away and never look back.
No one could claim me. Not the Teleen, not the Guildrin clan near the Haunted Forest, not even the Scren Palace. None of them had ever been my true home. The only place I had ever felt at home was beside Shade. Only then might this insanity go away, and the world would stop tilting so I could actually breathe. But I had to be closer, not pining for her from afar. I had to belong to her at all costs, be at her side, or it would be nothing short of suffocating.
I hoped this feeling was temporary.
Pausing in a darkened alcove, I closed my eyes and leaned against the wall, pressing my back to it and wishing I could disappear, when I heard Shade’s voice again. She was about to walk past me. I reached out, took her by the elbow, and pulled her into the alcove against me.
“Shade, can I talk to you privately?”
She stepped back, eyeing me wildly, with a touch of anger in her dark eyes.
“Soap, you gave me a fright.”
“Sorry. I just need to talk for a second.” I peeked out of the alcove and saw Dylan talking with Benton, chatting it up like a good brother-in-law. It almost made me want to smack them both, for I knew they hadn’t liked each other when they’d first met. Now they acted like they’d always been kin. Either way, I just wanted to get Shade alone to talk with her about what had been bothering me. I had often wondered if I’d be able to get the words out of my mouth if I ever did get her alone. Maybe this was my chance to find out.
“What do you want to talk about?” she asked, shuffling on her feet and glancing every now and then toward her husband. “This really isn’t a good time.”
“I know, I just… I just need to speak to you without him attached to you at the hip.”
Her eyes widened, and she stopped shuffling, her mouth agape. “What do you mean?” Her eyes darted back out of the alcove again, and I wanted to just pull her against me so she wouldn’t look out that way.
“I miss you. I miss you without him.”
Dylan was the barrier I could not penetrate, even when he wasn’t present. There was nothing I could do about it. I didn’t hate the guy, I just disliked the situation at hand. Shade fidgeted, something I rarely saw her do anymore in her position of high authority at the Scren Palace.
“Soap,” she whispered. She stopped looking at Dylan and finally looked at me. She really looked at me like she’d never seen me before in her life. She let her eyes roam my face until they slipped ever so slowly down to my chest, inching their way all the way down my body and then back up to meet my expectant eyes again. She had slipped and let her real emotions show on her face, unmasked and raw. I wanted her to look at me like that every time I saw her. Again and again.
“Shade, I—”
“We cannot be alone. I cannot risk it.” Her hushed whisper sounded desperate as her breath caught, and she peered up at me through hooded eyes and dark lashes. The torture of having her near was unbearable. If only I could scoop her up in my arms right then, take her to a room, and have my way with her. If only she’d let me. I would make sure she would never be able to live without me again.
“But, Shade, I—I….” I couldn’t finish. I heard Dylan ask a servant if he’d seen which way Shade had gone. I swore the guy had a sixth sense about her. She immediately averted her eyes, but at least I now knew that our love was not dead. It was buried but still desperately alive. But there was no air. If it remained buried much longer, it would suffocate.
“I’ll see you later, Soap.” Shade took off, leaving me in the turbulent wake of her presence, never to be the same ever again. In fact, I hadn’t been from the day we’d met.
Chapter Eighteen
Benton
“So this mission to the Teleen Caverns… when are we leaving?” Dylan avoided looking me straight in the eye as his jaw tensed. He’d just come from speaking with Shade and Soap together, a sight that looked like pure torture for all three of them. I could tell there was some friction between him and Soap, and I wondered if something new was going on. I tried to shake it off and discussed the plan of finding the place with the sacred feathers atop the Teleen Caverns Zena had told us about. I personally couldn’t wait to see the place, but Shade wouldn’t have us traipsing out of there without a warm welcome and good night’s sleep.
I’d sent word about our intentions before we’d arrived, and I wondered what sort of discussion had happened between my sister and her b
eloved before we had shown up. Glancing between the two after they’d spoken briefly with Soap, I was betting it was one of the most interesting conversations they’d had in months.
“I hope it’s not too soon,” Zena said, sighing as she flicked her eyes between us. “I’m starving, and I heard there’s a huge feast being prepared for the guests.”
Dylan smiled at my human friend and threw me a curious glance. “Of course. We always make it a big affair when Benton and company visit. It’s Shade’s favorite time to lavish her baby brother with love and spoil him rotten. I’m also happy to have you all here. It will be great fun.”
There was no arguing that. I could tell Dylan’s encounter with Soap had left him feeling somewhat frustrated. I had to admit, it was curious that the two had barely spoken and seemed to want to avoid each other. There was no point in speculating about Shade. It would do no one any good. I hoped Dylan knew that as well as I did—maybe more so than I did. I wasn’t too sure, but this time Dylan allowed his eyes to meet mine, and there was a question there. What was he getting at?
“I’m certainly glad to be back,” I said. “You all right, bro?”
“I’m fine. It’s just….” He darted his eyes around the room, but didn’t find Shade anywhere nearby. “Shade has been a bit distant lately. I think something is bothering her, but she won’t say what it is.”
“Dude, girl problems. Am I right?”
He chuckled, but I could tell he wasn’t happy.
“Give her some space,” I said. “Shade always kept to herself when things were confusing or hard for her. She’ll warm up again. Just give her some air.”
“It has me going crazy. I just don’t know what Soap has been doing. He says things to her. She never seems quite the same afterward, but she won’t say what he’s told her.”