Puck grinned. He’d never known a gay guy well. He knew a few in high school, but they were only acquaintances. They seemed to hang together in a small pack and wanted nothing to do with Puck and his friends.
Ross was genuine, and he was a nice guy. He seemed able to drop the craziness of the kisses, too. A friend like Gil would have kicked his ass to the curb. “Thank you for that, Ross. I really appreciate it.”
“It was amazing to walk back into the house and see you talking to Addie while you watched TV. It was perfect. I…” Ross choked up again and reached up to wipe at his eye. “I loved seeing it.”
The tears made Puck uncomfortable. His dad never cried. He didn’t cry about anything even the day his wife walked out the door. Puck followed suit most of the time, but he lost it when Miranda said, “Goodbye.”
“I had a question. When I was out in the garage, something was missing.”
Puck tensed. He often worried about someone breaking into the house or garage. “Something is missing?”
“You wear those motorcycle gloves. Where’s your bike?”
The tension in Puck’s shoulders dissolved. “Oh, that. I haven’t had a bike since before Miranda got pregnant. We were a little short on a couple of bills, so I sold it. It was hard to see it guy, but it helped get us through a few hard months.”
“Do you miss it?”
Puck shrugged. “I guess I miss being out away from the rest of the world sometimes.” He paused for a moment before changing the subject. “What do you like to watch? We can change to something else if you want to. I get addicted to these shows about houses. Someday I’ll own one that I can work on.”
“During the day? I’m almost never home during the day. I don’t even know what’s on. We can watch whatever you like.”
Puck switched to a show about home sales. He said, “It doesn’t take long to see what’s on when you’re stuck at home for days with the kid. Everything turns into a mindless routine. This show, that show, and then Addie cries. Feed, diaper, play, and then this show and that show. Some days it was noon, and I didn’t know where the morning went. I did it on auto-pilot. That happened over and over for eight weeks. In one way it was good. It kept me from thinking about other things.”
When the morning wore down, Ross ate a lunch of two slices of pizza and asked, “Can we make a grocery list? I’ll go shopping. What do you like to eat other than pizza and cold cereal?”
Puck didn’t like making lists. He went to the grocery store and grabbed what drew his attention. If pork chops were on sale, he could throw them in a pan and come up with something worth eating.
Most weeks Puck didn’t need a lot more than hamburger, bananas and breakfast cereal. Ross wanted a plan. An hour later, Puck threw up his hands, “Okay, fine, just get what’s on your list. I can’t talk about this anymore.”
“Are the two of you okay? I’ll go take care of this.”
Puck was more than ready for Ross to go to the store. The comfortable atmosphere he enjoyed earlier quickly disintegrated amid the raft of questions about eating. Ross said, “This is healthier. You can just put this in place of that, and you’ve got a great meal.” He was losing sight of territorial boundaries. Puck was happy to grab whatever was in the fridge or the cabinet and make a meal even if that meant eating ravioli out of a can.
As Ross pulled out of the driveway, Puck said to Addie, “Your mom was easier. She knew what I liked and didn’t like. She didn’t ask a bunch of questions. She cooked, and I ate what she put on the table.”
After he settled Addie back into the bassinet, Puck thought about the kisses again. He finally had time to think without having to pay attention to a long string of questions. He wanted to cringe every time he remembered saying that the kisses felt right. They did feel good, but there was no way they could be right. He was straight, and that wasn’t going to change. He wasn’t going to run around kissing men for the rest of his life.
Surely, the kiss was about loneliness. That was the logical explanation. What Puck needed was more time with friends. He needed time with the kind of buddies who could give him a bro hug and share a beer. He didn’t need kisses and cuddling.
By the time Ross returned with four plastic bags of groceries, Puck had worked himself into a ball of frustration over the two kisses. He said, “Honestly they didn’t mean anything. I want you to know they didn’t mean anything. I’m just lonely. I’m not gay. I’m straight. I like you, but not like that. I’m sorry if I’m disappointing you. I was a fucking mess last night. You understand that, don’t you?”
Ross hauled the bags up to the kitchen counter. “What happened while I was gone? Are you feeling okay? That’s a whole lot to throw at me all at once. Do we need to talk? Can I at least put the groceries away for you?”
10
Riverside
It was almost 8:00 p.m. when Ross returned home. He knew that he stayed too long at Puck’s, but he found it difficult to leave. Puck was still hobbling around on the ankle, and he refused a doctor’s assistance. He said that he would call in sick the next day, and the day after that was Saturday. “I’m sure the ankle will be fine by Monday. I can hang out here with Addie until then. That’s what we’ve done for more than two months already. Thanks for everything you did. We won’t starve to death now.”
Ross asked, “Do you want me to make anything to stick in the freezer for you? I bought stuff to cook a lasagna just in case.”
“No, and I hate to say no, but I can’t be any more in debt to you. It would drive me crazy. I can’t do it. You’re a great guy, but it’s enough already. We will be fine.”
By the time he walked out the door, Ross felt like he’d pushed too far. Puck was overwhelmed. He was still dealing with grief. He didn’t have support from parents except for occasional phone calls from a father who lived in California. The ankle was still causing pain, and he was trying to figure out who he could hire as a sitter.
Ross said, “I’ll find out about the sitter this weekend. If he’s willing, you’ll like him. I guarantee it.”
“Another gay guy like you?”
Ross frowned. “Yes. Is there something wrong with that?”
Puck backed off. “No, there isn’t. I was only asking. I’m sorry.” He sat down on the couch and pointed the remote control at the TV. It was the signal to leave.
When he finally walked through the front door of his apartment, Ross sensed an overwhelming need to paint. He was about halfway through the commission for Alan and Diego. If he worked all evening, he thought there was a chance he could finish it.
Part of Ross’s plan for the painting was to feature the colors of a sunrise. He wanted to show the pinks, purples, and pale yellows that dominated the morning sky. Diego often wore dress shirts in similar shades.
Ross’s state of mind intensified his focus. An hour later, he backed up and stared at a pinkish red that was so intense it almost looked like the sky was on fire. He remembered Alan saying how much Diego liked bold colors. “Diego’s going to have all the bright colors he can handle.”
By 9:00 p.m., Ross was spending as much time thinking as he was painting. He couldn’t stop concentrating on Puck, and he knew that he had to sort the thoughts out so he could clear his mind. He wanted to arrange them logically. Unfortunately, he wasn’t sure that Puck was willing to be logical. Two hours later, Ross collapsed into bed exhausted by both the painting and his own speculation about the future. He set the alarm for 7:00 a.m. and drifted off to sleep within minutes.
Fortunately, Friday was uneventful. The roads were clear, and despite the frigid cold of a Minnesota winter, the sun was out. Rhea was brimming with stories to tell when Ross arrived.
She said, “Red Wing was like a ghost town! The neighbor boy came over to shovel my sidewalk, and he slipped on the ice. I did my best to behave like a TV grandma and brought him a mug of hot chocolate. When I called Mr. Flores, he told me he was ready to go back to Mexico. He said Minnesota was turning his south-of-the-border blood to ice.”
“The funniest thing is I think he had the phone on speaker.”
Raising an eyebrow, Ross asked, “Oh? What did you hear?”
“It was about 7:00 a.m. I guess. He got my text message, and he called to make sure I stayed home. Anyway, after he complained about the cold, I heard a voice in the background.”
“Alan?”
“I hope so. He said, ‘Quit whining about the cold and come back to bed!’ I hope that was Alan.”
“Did Diego follow the instructions?”
“That was all it took. I heard both of them laugh before the phone cut off and then he was gone.”
“That’s so sweet.” Alan was one of Ross’s favorite people, and he knew Diego was a great partner. Most of the time Alan was relatively reserved, and Diego could be an emotional powder keg. Ross guessed that their sex was explosive, to say the least.
Rhea asked, “How did you spend your day off?”
“It’s a long story.”
“I’ve got time. It’s Friday, and all of southeastern Minnesota and northeastern Iowa were closed yesterday. I can’t imagine anything is urgent today.”
Ross told the whole story while they each sipped morning cups of coffee and kept an eye open for Diego. Ross ended the story as he said, “He insists there is no meaning to the kisses.”
“You don’t believe that, do you?”
“No, but I’m not sure what to do about it.”
“Do you think he’s boyfriend material?”
“Maybe not right now, but eventually. He’s a fantastic father, but I feel kind of creepy going after a guy who thinks he’s straight. He just buried his wife a few months ago, too.”
Rhea said, “Think is the important word here. You need to find out more. I suggest that you stick in there and be a good friend. You are an outstanding friend. I know that. It will sort itself out after awhile.”
“How long is that?” asked Ross.
“I’m no matchmaker. Two weeks? Two years? I guess it depends on how much you like him. Are you serious about finding a sitter for him? I think that’s a good way to hang on to the connection.”
Ross nodded and sipped the last of his coffee. “I think that’s the next step. I’m going to take care of that tomorrow.”
“There you go. You have a plan. Meanwhile, help me figure out what to order for our lunch.”
Leaning back in his seat, Ross asked, “Are we going to do any work today?”
Rhea shrugged. “Maybe not.” She laughed. “It depends on whether Mr. Flores shows up.”
Ross loved working with Rhea. She was a skilled supervisor. She knew when to work hard and when a break was needed. She got along very well with Diego. He once said he would trust her with his life. It was the best job Ross ever had, and Diego paid him well for his efforts.
Ross set his alarm for 6:00 a.m. Even though it was Saturday morning, he knew that he needed to get down to the riverfront early. It was a cold morning in early April. The mercury barely pushed above twenty-five degrees, and it was breezy out. Fortunately, there was no sign of snow in the air.
Ross bundled up tight and remembered to wrap a scarf around his neck. It was a short drive down to the park along the riverbank of the Mississippi. If it were summer, he would consider walking, but it was far too cold for that.
He spotted the pickup truck in the parking lot and grinned when he saw it. He’d timed his arrival correctly. As Ross climbed out of his car, the first fingers of pink light were starting to spread over the eastern horizon.
At the bottom of the slope leading down to the edge of the river, a single man stood silhouetted by the morning light. He stared out at the ice-choked river with his feet planted a shoulder’s width apart.
Ross called, “Dak! You’re just the guy I want to see!”
Dak turned on his heel. “Ross? What are you doing down here? It’s not even daylight yet.”
Ross walked up and offered a hug. Dak’s powerful biceps and shoulders delivered one of the best warm hugs around. “Brody told me that you’re down here every Saturday morning. I didn’t know if that was still true with Penelope as part of the family, but I thought I’d take the chance.”
“Yeah, I make Brody roll out of bed early on Saturdays now. Since I play stay-at-home dad during the week, the least he can do is hold down the fort while I commune with the river.”
“Does it mean a lot to you?”
Dak nodded. “Something about those years working on the tow. The river seeped into my blood, and I don’t think it’s ever going to leave. I think it happens to a lot of people who live in river towns, too, but it’s not as intense. Be careful, Ross. It might happen to you.”
Ross stood next to Dak and watched a large branch float gently downstream. He wondered was slowly working on his subconscious mind. “I’m not sure it would be a bad thing if it did happen to me.”
Dak turned to his side. “What brings you here? Did you want to see me?”
“I wanted the benefit of your wisdom. I also hoped we could talk in private, so this seemed like a good option.”
Dak shrugged. “Brody’s definitely smarter than me. I’m not sure how much help I can give on whatever it is, but I’ll do my best. If it’s more his area than mine, I’m happy to give you a referral.”
Ross shivered and rubbed his arms.”Aww, thanks.”
“You look cold. Why don’t we see if the donut shop is open? Is it okay to talk there, or is it something that’s really private?”
“No, that would be fine. In fact, I think that’s a great suggestion. How about I follow you? I’ll buy the donuts and coffee.”
The downtown donut shop in Coldbrook Bend held five small tables and a bakery counter filled with tasty baked goods. Early on a Saturday morning, they were open, but they served a small trickled of customers. Sunday was the big day for a bakery in town. The churches all needed donuts and pastries for morning coffee.
Dak settled at a table near the shop’s plate glass windows and said, “Just a single glazed donut for me. I’m watching this.” He pointed at his firm, toned belly.
“Like you have any problems there.” Ross ordered a chocolate-frosted donut for himself and balanced two plates and two cups of black coffee on the way back to the table.
Dak asked, “How is working with Diego? Are you having problems there? I know that he can get a little excited sometimes. He’s a great guy, but someone like Diego can be the fire to somebody else’s water.”
Ross shook his head. “There are no problems there at all. Diego is great, and working with Rhea is even better. We make a great team, and the business is always growing bigger.”
Dak wrapped his hands around the cup of coffee to warm them. “Brody will be happy to hear that. He still talks about missing you at Home Pro, but he knew that he couldn’t offer you what Diego can afford to pay. He thinks the world of you.”
“Yeah, I miss them, too.” Ross sat in silence and bit into his donut.
“You did catch up to me to talk about something, didn’t you? It wasn’t just about having a partner for donuts and coffee, was it?”
“No.” Ross chose to get right to the point. “Dak, could you take care of another baby along with Penelope?”
Dak nearly choked on his donut. He reached up and wiped his lips with a napkin. “Another kid? Are you adopting? I guess single gay guys do that sometimes.”
“No, but I know somebody who needs a little help.”
“With a kid? Alan and Diego have a dog. Who do you know with a kid?”
Ross told Dak about meeting Puck at the grocery store, and then he mentioned Miranda’s death. He said, “It still tears at my heart when I think about that.”
“Yeah, that’s seriously rough. Brody still has a tough time over his mom, and it’s been a few years now. Losing your wife after the baby is born. Wow. I can’t even wrap my head around that.”
“So you’ll help out
?” asked Ross.
Dak cringed. “I don’t know. Penelope is a handful. She’s already crawling, and some days I’m exhausted trying to keep up with her. I point at Brody when he walks through the door, and I say, ‘Your turn!’”
“I think he might be interested in me.”
Dak wrinkled his brow. “How does that work? He was married to a woman.”
Ross told the story of the kisses. “And his regular sitter is going away for an undefined number of weeks, and I told him I thought I knew the perfect guy. He is such a great father, and he needs help.
“Aww shit. You know I’m just a bunch of mushy goo inside when it comes to kids. At least that’s what Brody tells everybody. Are you sure there’s nobody else out there?”
“The closest grandparent lives in California.”
“I can’t make a decision this morning. I have to run it by Brody. He could be weird about it. He can be a little overprotective of Penny.”
“Addie is almost a year younger. What trouble could she be for Penny?”
“Addie? Really? Fuck, did you know I had an Aunt Addie? She was my favorite great-aunt until she passed away about ten years back. You really know how to get a guy right here.” Dak pounded a fist into his chest.
Ross sipped his coffee. He worked hard to suppress a grin. He knew that his friends would come through. “I’ll owe you from the bottom of my heart. Anything you or Brody need, just give me a call.”
“Okay, let me run it by Brody. Is it okay if I share the stories? He’s a sucker for romantic shit. He sits and watches those movies with a box of tissues in his lap. It’s the funniest thing.”
“Yeah, I don’t see any harm in that. Give me a call when you find out. If I can know by tomorrow night, that would be great.”
Dak sighed. “You’re not in a hurry, are you?”
11
Sunday Morning
By Sunday morning, Puck’s life settled into a routine again. He could walk on the ankle with only minor pain. He expected to be pain-free in a couple of days. Addie behaved like nothing happened. The only piece missing from the routine was a babysitter.
River Town Box Set Page 37