Valkyrie

by Raythe Reign

  “Lovers! That makes us sound like adults!” Loki’s hand moved convulsively under his, but Thor would not let go. He had this mad idea that if he kept Loki’s hand in his that the Aesir could not get away. “But instead we were like children hiding what we were doing from your parents!”

  Thor went very still. He remembered all too well how he had asked Loki to keep under wraps their renewed relationship from Odin especially. His off-again, on-again relationship with Loki in their earlier days had convinced his father that any connection between them was unwise. But that wasn’t the only reason that Odin disapproved. Thor also knew that it put a kink in his father’s plans to make Loki the scapegoat for everything if that scapegoat happened to be his son’s lover.

  But this last time between him and Loki had been different than any other time before. They had been honest with one another. They had admitted their faults and tried tolerance for once. It had been working. More than working.

  I was so in love with you … I am so in love with you …

  It wasn’t that he was afraid to tell his father about them. “I wanted to be sure before we –”

  “Sure of what?” Loki’s voice sizzled with anger and outrage.

  Thor knew that the other Aesir was especially prickly about not fitting in amongst the other gods. Always Loki was on the outside and, though he claimed to prefer it that way, Thor knew better. He also knew that his insistence on silence had, undoubtedly, felt to Loki that Thor was intent keeping him on the outside.

  “Are you going to pretend that our relationship was ever a steady, stable thing? I wanted to show Father that this was it for me. I was going to divorce Syf and ask you to join with me when –”

  “But you wanted to be sure first?” Loki interrupted and his hand grew suddenly icy under Thor’s.

  The Thunder God jerked his hand back as ice crystals pierced his palm. He shook his hand until the ice melted.

  “You want to fault me for that? All right. Yes, I wanted to be sure that you weren’t going to pull the rug out from under me after I divorced my wife, angered my parents and caused all my friends to question my sanity!” Thor snapped.

  “If I am that unwise of a decision that you would risk so much then perhaps you should be glad that I walked away before you had a chance to wreck your life,” Loki remarked.

  “How did this become about me and not you walking away? Why am I the villain and not you?” Thor asked.

  Loki went back to polishing glasses. “You keep looking for bright lines, Thor. There aren’t any. No heroes. No villains.”

  “No happy endings.” Thor stared sadly at Loki. “When I see you my heart sings, but I see that my failings are too great for you to see past them.”

  Loki’s glass polishing stopped. He wasn’t looking at Thor. He was staring ahead. His golden eyes were unreadable. “Do you love them?”

  “Who?”

  Loki glanced up at the ceiling and Thor knew who he meant: Liam and Cameron. Just at the thought of those two a smile appeared on his lips. Liam was the son of his dreams! And Cameron made his heart ache! Little Cam with his brilliant mind and artistic talent. He so desperately needed to be assured of love. Brave Liam who would take on the world to keep Cameron safe.

  “You know I do,” Thor answered, his voice rough with emotion.

  “They’re ours,” Loki said, his gaze darting to Thor and then away. He had stopped polishing. His hands had curled tightly around the edge of the bar as if he was afraid that he would lose his balance or perhaps the rug would be pulled out from under him.

  “What do you mean ‘ours’? I know they have our blood in them –”

  Loki shook his head, silencing Thor. “They’re ours. I wove them together. All the traits of you and me. These are our ultimate children, Thor.”

  Thor was too stunned to speak. “Liam and Cam are … they’re our sons?”

  Loki nodded. “It took a lot of doing, a lot of work, a lot of planning, but I was able to do it. No one else’s interference … or help.”

  Thor’s gaze went up to the ceiling and he thought of Cameron and Liam. From the moment they were born he had been riveted on them. Syf had asked him what it was about them that fascinated him so. He would give valid answers. Liam’s bravery and self-sacrifice. Cameron’s artistry and sensitive nature. But she had never believed that was the whole story. He felt like he was lying to her though he did not know any other explanation to give.

  Now he knew.

  Thor’s hands curled around the mead cup and it threatened to break under his hands. “Why did you let them go through so much hardship? Liam dead. Cameron nearly mad. Mary and Kurt were fine people, but … we are their parents no matter whose womb and sperm they came from!”

  Loki closed those incredible eyes. And then he smiled. “You love them even more knowing that they are ours.”

  “Yes! Why are you so surprised –”

  Before he got more out Loki grasped his face and kissed him. It was a desperate, almost furious kiss. He tasted Loki’s anguish and love for him. He knew that the other Aesir had been desperately afraid. They broke apart and Loki rested his forehead against Thor’s.

  “Why don’t you trust me? Have I betrayed you so deeply that you don’t know how much I love you?” Thor’s voice was raw.

  Loki let out a laugh, but it was not a sound of mirth. “When I want something very much I never get it. And I want you beyond everything.”

  Thor’s heart clenched. “Oh, Loki, I’m already yours.”

  “Don’t say that!” Those hands convulsively gripped his face.

  “Why not? It’s true.”

  Loki feathered his fingers through Thor’s hair. His gaze was more intense than ever. Those golden eyes burned. “Because you don’t know everything yet.”

  “Then tell me everything,” Thor suggested softly. Truth between them had been a good thing. It had stopped the misunderstandings. It had also stopped Loki from doing things that were morally questionable. It worked better when he ran things by Thor first.

  Loki’s fingers curled against his cheeks and he felt in their tenseness how much Loki didn’t want to tell him whatever it was.

  “Do not be afraid. I have always forgiven you. And you have given me two wonderful sons,” Thor said. Even then he imagined going upstairs with Loki later, after the young men had tired themselves out through lovemaking, and looking at them with all the pride and joy they both had. Thor had other children yet Liam and Cameron were more precious to him than any of them. He knew it was unfair. He tried to not show it, but the truth was guessed by almost everyone.

  And now I have a chance to be with them and Loki.

  Loki took a deep breath and rattled out, “You know that I often do not say what I mean or mean what I say?”

  “I would never have guessed that of you,” Thor replied dryly.

  Those golden eyes narrowed, but then the desperate look appeared again. “I went to Odin just before the last battle with the Gash.”

  Thor blinked. “You went to Father? About what?”

  “About you. Us.” Loki swallowed convulsively.

  “What exactly did you say?” Thor asked carefully. Loki parsed words to the nth degree. He had been on the losing end of a bet simply because Loki had phrased things a certain way.

  “I told him that I would ensure that the Gash was defeated if he would do one thing for me in return.” Loki’s fingers dug into Thor’s scalp as though he was afraid that the Thunder God were going to pull away.

  Thor’s blue eyes narrowed. “Why would you not have shared that information with him regardless of reward?”

  Loki let out a shrill laugh. “Because it was my best chance to have you!”

  Thor blinked in confusion. “You had me. I do not understand –”

  “No! I didn’t! Not completely! Not while his approbation stood between us!” Loki hissed.

  “What my father thinks is not a determining factor for me!” Thor cried.

  Loki lo
wered his head until his forehead leaned against the bar top. When he started to thump his forehead against it, Thor grasped Loki’s head and stopped him from hurting himself.

  “What are you doing? Stop that! Come sit beside me. I am tired of this bar between us. Better yet, sit on my lap.”

  “Sit on your lap?” Loki lifted an eyebrow.

  “Yes. It’s been some time since we cuddled.” Thor felt a jolt of desire run through him. Loki was not small, but he was compared to Thor. Much more slender and lithe, rather like Cameron, with delicate features.

  Loki did not walk around the bar to get to him. No, the Trickster God vaulted the bar and slid easily into Thor’s lap. He was facing the Thunder God, his arms around Thor’s neck and a mischievous smile on his face. The weight of him, the masculine scent of him, simply having him right there had Thor holding Loki tightly to him. He buried his face against Loki’s chest.

  “How I have missed you! Every part of you! Every aspect of you,” Thor mumbled against Loki’s skin.

  He felt Loki’s hot breath on top of his head. “I thought you would have forgotten the joys of me. You’ve had Syf’s –”

  “Don’t.” Thor lightly punched Loki’s side that had the Trickster God giving out an ‘oomph’ of air. “She has been a good and honorable wife. I, however, have not been an equal husband.”

  “She got what she deserved.” Loki sniffed.

  “How can you say that?” Thor lifted his head to look into Loki’s face.

  “I can say that because she always knew that you didn’t love her.” Loki sniffed again. “She just hoped that you might come to forget me.”

  “That is impossible,” Thor murmured. His hands framed Loki’s taut waist. He squeezed the Aesir’s sides, relishing the feel of hard muscle under his palms.

  “Yes, it is and she knew that from the very beginning.” Loki carded his hands through Thor’s hair. “She and I had a very good talk before the two of you wed.”

  Thor’s eyebrows rose up into his hairline. “You and Syf talked without blood being drawn?”

  “Figurative blood was drawn, if not literal.” Loki shrugged. “I told her that you and I would always be circulating each other. That it would never be just the two of you in your relationship. And, in the end, your heart was mine.”

  “Of course she did not believe you!” Thor chuckled.

  Loki did not laugh. His gaze was serious and intense. “Of course she did. She is not a stupid person.”

  Thor’s breathing went ragged. “At the time I married her I thought to be loyal to her. We had fought so bitterly then.”

  “You had the best of intentions, Thor.” Loki leaned down and kissed Thor’s lips tenderly. “But I knew it would never be done with us and so did she. You should feel no guilt. She walked into this with her eyes open.”

  When Thor thought of Syf he had fond feelings. She had always been his good friend and companion. More “one of the boys” than a love interest. Loki had been utterly different. While having Loki fighting on his side often ensured complete success – often it meant no fight at all, for the Trickster God managed to outwit their opponents, or he used his magic to simply destroy them – Thor never felt that Loki was “just a friend”. From the very beginning his loins had been on fire the moment he had seen the slim, yet muscular form of the laughing, taunting Trickster God. He’d always desired him.

  “She deserved better,” Thor said after long moments. “I have never been faithful to her in my heart.”

  “Like I said: she knew that and she accepted it. But now you are here. With me.” Loki suddenly ground his front against Thor’s. There was this playful look in his eyes that had Thor laughing, but then he remembered what Loki had said. He had something to confess and he would not get away from that by offering lovemaking. Lovemaking would happen afterwards. They needed a clean slate.

  “You were going to tell me about your conversation with my father,” Thor reminded him, holding onto his hips so that Loki could not move.

  Loki groaned and pouted. “You are no fun whatsoever.”

  “I am very fun. But it will be better if you get this confession done and over before we take this into the carnal arena.”

  “The carnal arena? You are so odd, Thor, but I cannot help but love you anyways,” Loki said lightly.

  But Thor closed his eyes and relished those words. Loki loved him. Loki loved him still. He opened them again and said, “Tell me, my love.”

  Loki grew serious again and Thor could feel the tension in him. He petted Loki’s sides and back. The Trickster God settled under his gentle touches.

  “I offered to ensure that the Gash was sent back to where it belonged without any more casualties if he would give me one thing in return,” Loki said quietly.

  “What?”

  “You. I asked that he give us his blessing. That he stop interfering in our relationship. That he let us be together,” Loki said. He was not blinking. His eyes were a sea of gold.

  “And what did he say?” Thor’s mouth went dry. He had a feeling that he already knew.

  Loki let out the softest, saddest laugh. “He said ‘no’. And he’s continues to say no, Thor. When Liam came to ask me what I want, what I will take in exchange to give the Aesir free range on Earth, it’s always been the same.”

  “Loki —”

  “It’s you, Thor. I want you and Odin won’t give me you.”

  CHAPTER TWENTY-SEVEN: CORRUPTION

  Sheriff Mary Blake was beyond bone tired. There were black smudges under her eyes and her shoulders drooped visibly because she simply didn’t have the strength to stand up straight any longer. She sank down in a chair outside of Juan’s room. His bed was empty now. He had been removed to another facility as his room here had become a crime scene.

  Just before he had been taken away, he’d woken up and stared straight at her. His eyes were clear and she knew he was fully and wholly him again.

  “Mary,” he’d wheezed out.

  She’d gone to his side, the ambulance crew moving out of the way to give her room, and took his hand in hers. His hand was hot and sweaty while hers seemed so cold in comparison. Inside of her, she trembled, wanting to cry out that it wasn’t right or fair that a good man like Juan had been hurt like this. He had to recover. He had to get back all he lost.

  But even if he does, he’ll have something more than he had before. Something bad.

  “Juan, it’s all right. You’re going to be all right,” she said this like a litany. If she repeated it enough then perhaps it would be true.

  But his expression had shown her that he did not believe her. He swallowed and she could almost feel how painfully dry his mouth was when he finally spoke, “You have to stop it.”

  She froze. If he revealed what happened there would be trouble. The ambulance personnel were listening. She had to find some way to assure him, but not reveal anything. Thankfully, he had said “it” and not “the Gash” or “Aesir” or “Valkyrie”. She got out, “Juan, I —”

  “You need to stop it, Mary. It cannot be allowed.” His dark brown eyes filled with tears. “It is against God.”

  It cannot be allowed. Against God … He remembers everything.

  Juan had never been terribly religious. His mother and father continually tried to get him to go to the Catholic church they did, but he steadfastly refused. So him using that phrase had her breath catching. She wondered for a wild, brief moment whether the Christian God could be real if the Aesir were. Maybe all the gods were real. Maybe they were all looking down upon Earth, wanting to help, but unable to do so because the Gash was here.

  “We have to take him, Sheriff,” one of the EMTs said, apologetically.

  She realized then that she had been silent too long, staring into Juan’s haunted eyes without saying anything. “Of course,” she told the EMT, but then turned back to Juan and squeezed his hand tightly. “We will. I promise you. We will.”

  She couldn’t tell him who the “we” were, but
she tried to put all the meaning of who those “we” were behind the word. She searched his face and she thought she saw relief on Juan’s face.

  “It must be stopped,” he repeated.

  “It will be. I’ll see you … when it’s over,” she promised.

  Then the EMTs had wheeled Juan away and their hands had pulled apart. She rubbed that hand over the top of her right thigh. She could still feel the ghost of his hand in hers. She felt like she was letting him down, because she was still here and not out looking for the Gash. But Liam, Cameron and the Valkyrie were. Even Thor was now here, which still sounded insane in her own mind. An Aesir here. The Thunder God himself. She should be able to leave the chase to them while she answered the same questions over and over again. Distracted the authorities. Kept other people from suffering Juan’s fate. She rubbed her face, trying to rub away sleep.

  The jingle of cuffs and the squawk of police radios filled her ears. The voices of the state police and her own deputies hardly rose above a whisper though as each new atrocity was discovered. All of them were overwhelmed by what had happened here and raised voices seemed disrespectful. The basement had been the worse with the piles of burnt children and the room beyond where she knew her own sons had been. The scorched walls, the choking air, the utter destruction. She had nearly fallen to her knees with the horror of what they must have undergone. But Mary never showed her emotions. She felt them, but she compartmentalized them. She did it at that moment.

  The only good thing had been finding two children, unharmed, and actually happy. They had seemed excited, nearly bursting with secrets. She knew that Thor was one of those big secrets. When the girl had looked at her as she was telling her story to the firefighters, Mary had put a finger over her lips to indicate for her to keep those secrets to herself. The girl had given her a half nod and continued telling the firefighters that she and the boy had simply hid with all the confusion going on.

  She knew the firefighters and the officers were overwhelmed with what they were finding in that hospital. She was as well. But there was one large difference between them, she knew what had really happened.