Ashes of Merciless
Page 19
“Sorry if I’m bothering you. Is this a bad time?” she asked quietly.
Gage leaned against the doorway. “No. We were just about to go to sleep. Is everything ok? Is Sophia all right?”
Vanessa nodded. “She’s fine. I think she was just feeling left out of everything and decided to run off, but she knows better now. She won’t go off by herself like that again. She’s not talking much, though. I think she’s still scared.”
“Understandable,” Gage said.
Vanessa craned her neck. Her eyes found me frozen in place holding a glass of water.
“May I speak with Ashley?” she asked cautiously.
Gage turned to look at me. I gave him a short nod.
“I’ll give you two a few minutes,” he said as he left the room.
Vanessa entered and closed the door softly. I set the glass of water down with my trembling hands and faced her.
“Ashley—”
I put a hand up. “Mrs. Verina, you don’t have to say anything.”
“Vanessa. Call me Vanessa. And yes, I do need to say this,” she said.
She went over to the window and pulled back the blue curtain. Her reflection watched me.
I studied the tremor in my hands while she gathered her thoughts, stared at the blue veins that snaked underneath my skin. The blood flowing inside of me was poison, swimming through my heart, weakening every organ. Every second brought me closer to darkness. Sadness and hatred filled me.
I jumped slightly when she finally spoke.
“Ashley, I’ve been most unfair and uncivil to you.” She turned away from the window and approached me. “I blamed you for everything. I even blamed you for my husband being a part of Merciless. I was forced to marry him, and I hated him at first. But I don’t feel that way about him anymore. I think I just wanted someone to blame, and you seemed to be the easiest target. I still think giving Shane that sleeping drug was wrong, but I’m glad you did.”
I blinked. “You are?”
She nodded. “Yes. If you hadn’t, where would my family be now? Maybe your Master would have shown Shane leniency, and when everyone was called to Headquarters, we would have gone. My husband, my child, and I would be dead, wouldn’t we?”
“I suppose so.”
Her eyes were hazel, the same color as Sophia’s, and they shone slightly. “And then you saved my Sophia. You saved the very center of my world.”
“Mrs. Verina . . . I mean, Vanessa . . . I love your daughter. I was scared to death when I saw her in that water,” I said truthfully.
I knew Vanessa didn’t realize how big of a deal it was for me to love someone outside of my own blood. I’d loved Gage, but I had also fought against my feelings for years. Sophia hadn’t been in my life for very long, yet she’d entered my heart easily.
And it wasn’t only Sophia that I loved. I knew I would do whatever I had to do to protect them all.
Vanessa’s face softened. “I know you love her. And she loves you despite my efforts to turn her against you. I’m so sorry.”
I folded my arms across my chest, my heart fluttering slightly. “It’s ok. I deserved your anger.”
Vanessa’s head tilted to the side. “Yes, but you don’t deserve what has happened to you. Your parents died before their time. And your condition . . .” She bit her lip and very carefully placed her hand on my shoulder. Her fingers were shaking. “I’ve said terrible things to you, things I will regret forever. I cannot take back those words, but Ashley, I pray for your sake that you will obtain the antidote.”
“Thank you,” I murmured.
Now Vanessa seemed even more hesitant. “And if I may, I have a very selfish request to ask of you.”
My eyes widened. “I’m not sure what I can do for you, but if I can help with something, I will.”
She smiled sadly. “How very wrong I’ve been about you,” she said.
Blood flooded my cheeks at her unexpected praise.
“I know you all plan to go to the Master’s home. I imagine you are planning on taking Gage, Lacey, Aden, Shane, and yourself?”
I fiddled with the hem of my shirt. I didn’t want her to know my plans had changed drastically.
“Well, yes. Gage and I agreed Viola should stay here.”
Her hand dropped from my shoulder. “Please, Ashley. Leave Shane behind with me. He can fight, but not as well as you might think. I do not want to lose him, and Sophia needs her father. Because there will be deaths, honey. Not all of you are going to come back here once you leave.”
Something tight was lodged in my throat. “I know. Don’t worry. Shane can stay here.”
Relief washed over her face. She obviously had been afraid of my answer.
“Thank you,” she said.
Vanessa hugged me. Shocked, I only managed to pat her back awkwardly.
She released me and smiled. “I’ll go get Gage for you so you guys can go to sleep. It’s been a horrible day.”
As she left the room, I stared at the moonlight coming through the window.
Everything now depended on the son of my worst enemy.
***
It wasn’t easy staying awake. Exhaustion seemed to weigh my body down instead of gravity, and it didn’t help that warm traces of morphine still coursed through my system.
I looked over to Gage’s sleeping face. He looked vulnerable, but not peaceful. His eyebrows were furrowed, and the dark circles under his eyes were blacker than ever.
Carefully, I slid out from under his grasp. His hand twitched, an unconscious, protesting gesture.
I closed the door softly behind me and looked at the darkness lining the other closed doors along the long hallway. Vanessa, Shane, and Sophia were behind one, Viola and Colbert behind another. The Evaluator was behind the last one.
It had taken hours for everyone to fall asleep. Gage and I had listened to his mother’s muffled crying through the walls, along with Shane’s angry ranting. The Evaluator had remained eerily silent. When those sounds had quieted, Gage had stared at the ceiling for a long time with me in his arms before he’d finally allowed sleep to overtake him.
I trailed my hand along the wall until I came to the kitchen. A few forgotten pieces of silver confetti shined on the floor, and a small pool of candle wax stained the table like dried blood.
It didn’t bother me that the celebration had been cut short; there were much more important things going on. I went to the table and scratched off the candle wax with my bitten fingernails.
What had we been celebrating anyway? A seventeen-year-old girl’s last birthday on Earth? Was that even something to celebrate? It wasn’t even something I wanted to acknowledge as much as I’d appreciated everyone thinking of me. Wasn’t it better to forget, to pretend it wasn’t even happening? That was how I’d coped with Ash and my Assignments.
Yet I knew trying to stay blind to reality wasn’t the smartest choice to make. When you remained blind and it came to the point where you had no choice but to open your eyes, reality could break you. It could wound you beyond healing, and you were left with nothing but a broken shell of yourself.
I turned away from the table and entered the large living room. Moonlight coming from the glass patio doors filled the room with soft light. Lacey was asleep on one couch, and on the other couch slept Aden.
As I walked by Lacey, I saw her hands covering her ears, as if trying to block out the sounds of her dreams. Tucked underneath her pillow was the gleaming metal edge of a gun.
I went to Aden and crouched down near his face. I reached out and poked him in the chest.
One of Aden’s eyes snapped open, and as soon as he opened his mouth, I covered it with my hand, bringing a finger to my lips. His eyes widened, and I gestured for him to follow me.
When I got to the sliding glass door, I turned to see him still warily looking at me from the couch. I rolled my eyes and reached inside the pocket of Gage’s shorts, pulling out a pocketknife. I held the knife out to him, hoping he understood.<
br />
It wasn’t like I couldn’t incapacitate him barehanded if he tried anything.
Aden stood up and came to me, waving a hand for me to put the knife away. I was careful not to smile as I did, happy with this small progress. I took my time sliding open the door, not wanting to wake Lacey.
Once we were both outside, Aden immediately spoke in a hushed tone. “I take it this couldn’t wait until morning?”
I crossed my arms over my chest, eyeing his movements almost unconsciously.
“More like this was the only time I could speak to you alone.”
Aden smiled slightly. “That boyfriend of yours is pretty protective, huh?”
I narrowed my eyes at him. “It’s not like he doesn’t have good reason to be. We’re not exactly in the safest of circumstances around here.”
Aden’s eyes lazily ran over my body. “I can see what he’s about.”
Annoyed, I took a step back from him. “Keep looking at me like that and you won’t walk away tonight with all your bones intact.”
He raised an eyebrow. “What, you’ll set him on me?”
I snorted. “I’m perfectly capable of dismembering you myself.”
“Of that, beautiful, I have no doubt. I pity the person who ever tries to take advantage of you.”
“Then you know not to mess with me. Look, I didn’t bring you out here so you could flirt with me,” I whispered angrily.
Aden sighed. “Well, that sucks. Here I was hoping to have a little fun.”
I looked at him, disgusted. Gone was the boy who’d cried when talking about his parents.
“What is wrong with you?” I asked. “After everything that’s happened today, how can you be acting like this?”
His eyes dilated slightly. “You’ll have to forgive me, beautiful. Call it a defense mechanism. It’s easier to put on a face and not show what you really are feeling, although earlier I let myself slip. But I’m sure an Assassin wouldn’t know anything about that, right?”
I swallowed hard and tried to imagine growing up with the Master for a father. Hearing my mother being tortured throughout my life, and waking up to find her throat cut.
Aden and I probably had more in common than I realized. He’d refused to carry out his father’s sick wishes, and in doing so, he hadn’t been the only one to face the consequences.
It was like looking into a mirror. And hadn’t I carried someone else’s face since I was ten years old? In so many ways, I had no idea who Ashley Garreth really was, or who she could have been had things been different.
Aden studied me as I pondered our similarities.
“That’s what I thought,” he said triumphantly. His face finally turned serious. “The others don’t trust me, especially your Gage and that guy with the glasses.” His hand stroked his swollen lips.
There was no point in lying. “No. They don’t.”
Aden went over to the railing and leaned against it. “Then why am I here? It seems stupid to ask someone for help if you don’t trust them, and couldn’t your Observer have just found out where my father lives? He found me.”
I picked at the wax underneath my nails. “It’s not that easy. On this, we have to be absolutely sure.”
“Do you trust me?” Suddenly, his eyes were very intense.
“I don’t know,” I answered honestly. “The Master always gave me a sinister-like vibe, but I don’t get that from you. You don’t feel anything like your father to me. You don’t even look like him.”
Aden’s face softened. “I’m proud to say I have everything of my mother in me. I’m nothing like that monster. I will not be like him.”
“And you didn’t see Sophia leave the house?”
He looked confused. “No. And if you’re going to ask me if I pushed her into the water, I’m going back to bed.”
“Sorry, it’s just . . . you were outside.”
“So she went out through the front door. If I knew a little girl was drowning, I wouldn’t have just been sitting there contemplating the different ways I could commit patricide.”
“Fine. But it’s not just about trust, ok? We need you,” I said.
He shook his head. “More like I need you. Sure, I wasn’t happy with the whole kidnapping thing, but that’s beside the point now. I’ve come around. I’m glad you guys found me. I could never have done this on my own, but now I have numbers and a better chance.”
I shifted my feet. “Well, that’s kind of what I wanted to talk to you about.”
“I’m not going to like this, am I?”
I went and stood in front of him, trying to ignore how his eyes examined me. Only Gage ever looked at me that way.
“I don’t want to put the others in danger. Viola can’t come anyway; she’s too upset. Shane and Lacey aren’t Assassins, and I can’t lose Gage.” I bowed my head. “Out of all of them, Gage is the one I cannot lose.”
“So you’re saying you want to do this with only me and you. That’s suicide.”
I met his eyes. “I’m dying, remember?” I said bitterly.
His eyes sparked. “May I remind you, beautiful, that I am not?”
“If you don’t go with me, I’ll go by myself.”
Aden snorted. “You don’t know if he’ll even be there. You don’t know what security measures he’ll have in place.”
My chin went up defiantly. “All I need is for you to tell me where he lives, and I’ll take my chances.”
His hand grabbed mine, and without thinking, I reached inside my pocket to grasp the knife with my other hand. He raised his eyebrows at me, but he didn’t let go of my hand.
“Let. Me. Go,” I said through clenched teeth.
“Do you want to die? Is that what this is?”
“Let go of me, or I’ll make you, and I can’t promise you won’t lose a finger in the process of me doing so,” I threatened.
He obeyed. “You’re crazy,” he said.
I laughed quietly. “You have no idea.”
He eyed me warily. “My father talked of your skills. I’ve seen you in action, but not even you can do this alone.”
“Then come with me,” I said angrily. “I can do this. You can even sit there and watch if you want.”
He raked his fingers through his tangled hair. “Is nothing going to change your mind?”
“No.”
“Even if I go and wake everyone up to tell them your insane plan? I’m pretty sure Gage would love to hear about this.”
The knife point was suddenly at his throat. Aden’s face was pale; even I hadn’t been aware of my movements. The blade was shaking, but I knew I hadn’t completely lost my touch.
“Do it,” I breathed. “Just try it and see what happens.”
To my surprise, he only chuckled. “You are a feisty little thing. Let me tell you now, he won’t be home.”
I pulled the knife away. “What?”
“He’ll be at Headquarters. Sorry to burst your bubble.”
“We can’t go to Headquarters. We’ll be shot—ˮ
“And you wouldn’t be shot going onto his property? The guards at the mansion are not members of Merciless, but they are paid bodyguards who are loyal to the one who supplies their paycheck. For someone so skilled, you’re not very bright. And are you forgetting that most of the members are dead?”
“He’ll have hired other people,” I argued, feeling very cold.
“Possibly, but there may be more on his side than any of you ever realized.”
“Why won’t he be home?”
“He may, but don’t take that chance. You want to go to the trouble of sneaking around his mansion just to find out he’s not there? I barely made it through the security when I escaped. . . . It’s more likely he’ll be at Headquarters. You should trust me on this.”
“The antidote . . . ,” I trailed off.
Aden looked to the sky. “Ashley, that was a long shot. It’s why I didn’t want to say anything.”
I turned away from him and went to the ra
iling, clutching the wood with white knuckles. Tears burned the back of my throat. Stupid to hope. Stupid to try to not have hope. I could feel it fading, blinking out of existence.
After a few minutes, Aden let out a big sigh. I felt his hand on my back, and I was too dazed to pull away. His voice was soft and sad near my ear.
“Ashley . . . Look, I’ll help you. I understand you want to protect these people. They’re your family. And after a few weeks, I’ll go myself to the house. The bodyguards will scatter once they realize my father is dead. If the antidote is there, I’ll find it for you. Ok?”
I looked at him out of the corner of my eye. “Why the change of heart?” My voice was thick and hoarse.
“Because I couldn’t save my mother.” His face was filled with the same sadness I knew all too well. “So I’ll save you. And I want revenge just as much as you do. This desire to kill my father . . . I know you understand. You didn’t bring me here for nothing. You all would have tried to find him eventually, and I can’t help but think it would have ended very badly. But you know Headquarters, so we may have a chance.” He leaned closer to me. “You saved my life once. Even though part of me wanted to die, I’m glad you came. And . . .”
I threw my arms around him, hardly aware of my actions. To my surprise, he held me tightly against him.
My mind whirled at the sudden change of events. In Aden, I couldn’t deny the strange connection I felt. I’d only ever felt a certain mutual understanding in one person, and that was Gage. It was such a rare feeling, and I couldn’t help embracing it.
“Maybe we can have a little fun,” he joked.
I pulled away abruptly. “Don’t get the wrong idea,” I warned.
Aden chuckled. “I’m no idiot. I see how you and Gage look at each other. So, when did you want to leave?”
I shook with nervous energy. “Now.”
“Now? You really are crazy.”
“I’m tired of waiting. It has to be now,” I protested.
Aden examined my face. “Are you absolutely sure? You look tired.”
“I’m more impatient than tired, ok? And please tell me you have some fighting skills.”
“I can hold my own,” he said with slight smugness.