Truth About Men & Dogs

by Andrea Simonne

“Sweetheart,” he murmured. His hand came up to stroke my neck as I continued my administrations. I felt his eyes on me, and when I glanced up, his mouth was open, his jaw flushed with arousal.

  After a short while, I stopped and moved over him, straddling his hips as I pushed his shirt up so I could see his chest. We were still using condoms, and he immediately reached over to the nightstand and grabbed one out of the drawer.

  “Hurry,” I said, desire rushing through me.

  He chuckled at my impatience, but when he finished and I sank down onto him, his whole face changed. His body tightened, and when his eyes flashed to mine, they were glazed with pleasure. “Goddamn,” he breathed. “I love it when you do that.”

  “Grab my hips,” I told him, a catch in my voice.

  I was never like this with Ethan, never this pushy or insistent. With him, I was giving all the time, and in the end, what did it get me? But Philip seemed to enjoy it when I took what I wanted from him, seemed to encourage it even. It was like he understood something about me I was only now starting to see myself. That I needed this.

  He grasped my hips, urging me on.

  Then I leaned over him and did exactly what he’d said I should do earlier—I fucked him senseless.

  Chapter Twenty-Four

  ~ Philip ~

  I listened as Claire fell asleep beside me. Her ass was tucked into my stomach, my arm lying across her hip.

  There was a full moon outside, so the room wasn’t as dark as usual. The sheet draped over her birdcage had become a canvas for trees to cast long shadows upon.

  I shut my eyes and tried to sleep, except I couldn’t stop thinking. It looked like my father was going to win that land bid. It turned out he was trying to join with Atlas—the same commercial developers we’d been planning to partner with. The group of investors in London had dropped out, and somehow my father had stepped in.

  I should have predicted he’d figure out a way. He always did. Until now, I’d had every intention of staying out of this whole thing. Except everything changed when Claire told me he was at that meeting. It enraged me to think of him charming her, charming everyone and landing on his feet once again.

  Before I knew it, I was texting Gavin and the CEO of Atlas on a fact-finding mission. I discovered things weren’t settled. Contracts hadn’t been signed yet, and my father was overconfident.

  Claire made a huffing noise in her sleep. It reminded me of how she sometimes snorted when she laughed. It was cute, though she didn’t think it was cute when I’d teased her about it the other day.

  “Instead of pirate princess, I think I’ll call you piggy princess.”

  Her expression had turned indignant. “Excuse me, but I do not sound like a piggy.”

  She was so fun to tease. I loved her snorting laughter, how she could be sweet one minute and sexy the next. The way she never played head games or pouted. If she disagreed about something, she stood her ground. It was relaxing to discover I could be myself around her. And then there was the way she’d sometimes smile at me with a sideways glance, or I’d watch her walking toward me and it took my breath away.

  Somehow in a short time, Claire had become very important to me. She was quality. The kind of woman you kept. I understood completely why Doug had fallen for her, why he’d been so desperate to win her heart. He obviously saw the same things in her as I did.

  Damn. I blew my breath out roughly.

  I felt sick thinking about my cousin. What the hell was I going to say to him? I glanced down at Claire as she slept, her soft body tucked into mine, and guilt burned through me. At the same time, I was grateful. Grateful for my good fortune, because I was happier than I’ve ever been.

  I had no idea how to tell him about Claire and me. Doug had called twice this past week, and I let both calls go to voice mail.

  At least I’m still making him money. I was still running his business, and things were so busy I’d had to hire two more contractors.

  Claire shifted in front of me. “Are you awake?” she asked softly.

  “Yeah, I can’t sleep. Did I wake you?”

  “No, I don’t think so.” My arm was still around her, and she slid her fingers down to entwine with mine. “Is your hand still bothering you?”

  “A little, but it’s mostly healed.” I leaned closer to stick my nose in her hair. She smelled like shampoo mixed with her own clean scent.

  “Are you thinking about your father?”

  I stiffened.

  “Don’t shut me out like this, Philip.”

  It wasn’t about shutting her out. I just didn’t want the stain of him anywhere near her.

  I took my hand back and brushed her hair aside, kissing the nape of her neck, knowing full well it turned her on. I heard her intake of breath, and my cock stirred.

  I ran my fingers down her back, enjoying the feel of her smooth skin. I wanted her again. I wasn’t surprised anymore by the strength of my desire, that it never waned. By now I would have lost interest with the women I’d dated in the past. It was strange to even think of them. They all seemed interchangeable.

  I slid my hand around to caress her breast, but she wasn’t having any of it this time. Instead she rolled over and faced me.

  “You’re changing the subject,” she said flatly.

  “I know.”

  “Please talk to me. What caused this rift? Why did you punch that porch rail?”

  I licked my lips but didn’t say anything.

  “Is it because he cheated on your mom?”

  I could just make out the curve of her cheek, her eyes on me, and even in the dark room, I saw the compassion there. I looked away from her, over to the shadows falling across her birdcage.

  We were both quiet as she waited for me. I knew this was one of those moments in a relationship where you either moved forward or you didn’t.

  I took a deep breath. “Yes, he cheated on her, but it went way beyond that. He left her, but he left all of us.” My jaw tightened. “Abandoned would be a better word.”

  “How old were you?”

  “Thirteen. I was thirteen, and Eliza was two.”

  She reached out to stroke my hair. It felt strange to talk about it, and I realized it was because I hadn’t for a long time. It was private and not something I shared.

  “Do you know why he did it?” she asked softly.

  I thought back to when I was a kid and how, as my father’s business grew, he acted different toward us, like we weren’t good enough. “Sometimes money changes people. The more successful he became, the more he treated us like useless baggage. He was especially cruel to my mom.”

  She quieted. “Was he abusive?”

  “Not physically but verbally. He decided he was in the top percent of earners, so he should have a woman who was in the top percent for looks.”

  I heard her soft intake of breath. “That’s terrible. Your mom is so nice.”

  “We came home from a school field trip one day and discovered he’d moved everything out of our house. The only thing left were the beds. What’s even worse is he took all the money—every single cent.”

  “What do you mean?”

  “I mean he cleaned out all the bank accounts. He left my mother penniless.”

  She sounded outraged. “But how? He can’t just do that!”

  “He did.” I still felt the weight of those memories like a shackle. A stone around my neck I dragged everywhere. The anger and shame. “We stayed in our house as long as we could, but he stopped paying the mortgage and the utilities.” I turned to Claire. “Do you see now why he’s poison? What kind of man takes everything and abandons his wife and baby?”

  “And you too,” she added softly. “He also abandoned you.”

  “My sister was only two.” My throat went tight, remembering what Eliza had been like back then. A toddler just learning about the world. So trusting. I closed my eyes.

  Claire’s warm hand stroked my face, and I reached up to slip my fingers through hers, held
them to me.

  “I wanted to protect them,” I told her, my voice rough, “but I didn’t know how.”

  “You were just a kid yourself.”

  “I know, but it’s not how I felt. Eventually we were evicted from our house.” I forced myself to continue, pushing forward to tell her the rest of it. “The utilities were shut off. My mom had been looking for a job, but it was difficult with a toddler to take care of, and I was in school all day, so I couldn’t help.” I licked my lips. “We wound up in a homeless shelter.”

  Claire’s eyes were on me, and I saw them widen in the dark.

  “Seven days. The worst week of my life.” I’d never forget that first night, the helplessness I felt. I blamed myself for letting it happen, for not knowing what to do or how to prevent it.

  And then there was the rage toward my father. Even now it was like pouring gasoline on fire. “I found out later he’d been on a ski vacation that same week.”

  “You’re kidding,” she breathed. “That’s horrible.”

  “It was horrible,” I acknowledged. “The only way I could get through it was to use my anger, to tell myself I’d get even someday.”

  She went quiet. I tried to imagine what she was thinking, trying to process the selfish monster I was related to. “What happened after seven days?”

  “My aunt Linda—Doug’s mom—took us in. She’s my dad’s sister. She agreed to watch Eliza during the day. Long enough that my mom could find work and eventually get her teaching certificate.”

  Claire nodded. “Doug’s mom sounds like a kind woman.”

  I snorted softly. The dragon lady was a piece of work, but I’d never forget what she did for us. And of course, she’s never let us forget it either. “She has her moments,” I admitted in a dry voice. “Not all of them good.”

  I thought of how she told me I was selfish on the phone not long ago. A selfish boy who had turned into a selfish man. But then I thought of Doug, of how I’d agreed to help him win Claire’s heart, yet here I was lying in bed with her.

  Aunt Linda was right. I was selfish.

  For a split second, I even considered giving Claire up, somehow turning things back around in my cousin’s favor.

  No. I won’t do it.

  A powerful stubbornness took hold of me. Selfish or not, I didn’t care. I wanted her. Consequences be damned.

  “What is it?” she asked, obviously sensing my churning emotions.

  “Nothing.”

  “I’m so sorry for what the three of you went through.”

  In the night’s quiet, surrounded by angry memories and guilt, our conversation brought out fears I seldom examined in the light of day. Vulnerabilities I didn’t like to think about, how the rug could be yanked out from under me at any time.

  I pulled her in tight. “Stay with me,” I whispered fiercely. “Stay with me always.”

  My gut told me this was right. She was right. It sucked that it had to come at a cost to Doug, but what was I supposed to do? Give her up?

  I pulled back to look at Claire, our faces close in the dark.

  “I’m here,” she said softly, stroking my jaw. “I’m not going anywhere.”

  I nodded with relief and then kissed her. Tenderly at first, her lips petal soft.

  She let me explore her mouth and then her body, so warm and willing. Every night I wanted her, but tonight was different. Tonight I needed her, and she gave herself to me with sweet abandon.

  I’d been with so many women, but none of them had ever been like this. None of them had ever felt so right.

  I was on the edge of sleep, lying on my back with my eyes closed. Blood pumped through my veins thick and slow. I felt peaceful. Satisfied. Claire was beside me, and all that anger and guilt seemed miles away.

  “Did you wear a condom?”

  My eyes jerked open. Any sense of peace evaporated. “I forgot.” I sat up, a wave of panic gripping me. “Goddamn, I completely forgot.”

  Her head was turned, and she appeared to be thinking things over. “It’s probably okay,” she said finally. “My period is due any day now.”

  “It is?”

  She nodded.

  I relaxed a little. “All right.”

  We both lay back down with Claire’s head on my shoulder. I tried to relax again but found myself staring up at the ceiling. I couldn’t believe I’d forgotten protection. I never forgot. Someone in my position was vulnerable to all kinds of craziness.

  I began to imagine what would happen if Claire got pregnant. Obviously I’d handle every expense. That wouldn’t even be an issue. No child of mine would ever have to worry about money or wind up in a homeless shelter.

  But then a peculiar thing happened. I began to imagine an actual child. A little girl. What would she look like? Would her hair be dark like mine? Or maybe blonde curls like Claire? With the two of us as her parents, she’d be a pistol, that was for sure. I imagined light blue eyes smiling up at me. Hopefully she’d get Claire’s pretty voice and maybe my head for numbers. I pictured the three of us out on the beach together. Laughter and little yellow rain boots splashing along the water’s edge.

  “Have you ever wanted kids?” Claire asked, startling me out of my fantasy.

  The little girl faded, and I was reluctant to let her go. In the past when people had asked me that question, I’d always given a careless affirmative, but now I gave it real thought.

  “Yes, when the time is right,” I said, realizing it was true. I wanted them. “How about you?”

  “I’ve always wanted them. Ethan and I were trying for a baby when he cheated on me.”

  I shook my head. Jesus, could that ex of hers be any more of a loser?

  Both of us were silent, and I sensed awkwardness, especially in light of my forgetting the rubber. “Listen, if something happened, I’d take care of everything. You know that right?”

  “Take care of everything?”

  “If you were to get pregnant accidentally. You wouldn’t have to worry.”

  She was quiet, and I found myself imagining it again, how much it would change my life. With amazement, I realized my earlier sense of panic had been replaced with a kind of yearning.

  Claire still hadn’t spoken. “Are you okay?” I asked.

  “I’m not, actually.” There was a strange note in her voice.

  I changed position and faced her. “What is it, sweetheart? Are you worried?”

  “No, it’s not that.”

  “Because everything will be all right. I promise.”

  She moved away from me and sat up. “I have to tell you something, and you aren’t going to like it.”

  “What?”

  “If I get pregnant accidentally, I’m keeping the baby. You should know that.”

  My brows went up.

  “Because I’ve wanted kids my whole life, and not having them has been my biggest regret. So if you want to get careless with condoms, you better prepare for the results.” She gave me a weighted look. “And it won’t be something you can just ‘take care of’ because the timing isn’t right.”

  I sat up too. “That’s not what I meant when I said I’d take care of everything. I meant I’d take care of you and the child.”

  “You did?” Her eyes widened, and I could see I’d knocked the wind out of her argument. “Oh.” She went quiet.

  “I don’t run away from my obligations.”

  She nodded. “I just didn’t want any misunderstandings.”

  I smiled. “Damn, listen to you. You’re like a mama bear without her cub.”

  “I guess I am. I can’t help it.” She threw her hands up. “Am I totally freaking you out?”

  “No. I like that you speak your mind.”

  She turned to me. “You do? Even now?”

  “Absolutely.” I thought of all the women I’d dated over the years who played head games or told me what they thought I wanted to hear. Until this moment, I’d never realized just how much I hated it. I leaned forward and kissed her shoul
der. “I don’t even mind your occasional temper. In fact, I like that too.”

  “My temper? I don’t have a temper!”

  I gave her a look, and she laughed.

  “Okay,” she conceded, “maybe I do have a temper. It’s weird because I was such a doormat during my marriage.”

  “You were?” I had to admit I was surprised. “I find that hard to believe.”

  “I was always trying to keep the peace. I gave in to Ethan with practically everything.”

  “Then it sounds like you’ve changed.”

  That gave her pause. “You’re right, I have changed. I don’t put up with anyone’s crap anymore.” She pointed at my chest. “Even yours. I don’t care how intimidating people say you are—you don’t bother me a bit.”

  I chuckled. “I’ve noticed.”

  We were both smiling, but then she sighed. “I should get an IUD or go on the pill again to be on the safe side.”

  “Probably,” I acknowledged.

  Our eyes were still on each other when my stomach took a dip. My chest went tight, and I couldn’t look away. Everything about her moved me. She was so pretty and tough sitting here in the middle of her fairy-tale house. I already knew I was losing my head.

  “Is that really your biggest regret?” I asked, genuinely curious. “Not having kids?”

  Claire nodded and then glanced toward the window. “It is. I know how crazy that sounds, since my divorce was so ugly, but I’ve always wanted them.” She turned back to me and appeared to be considering something. “What’s your biggest regret?”

  “I don’t have regrets,” I said immediately.

  “Really? Eliza once told me that. So there’s nothing?”

  I shrugged. “I don’t think so.”

  “You’re lucky.”

  “I suppose I am.” I was silent then, thinking it over. But then my breath halted as a terrible truth struck me. A boom of thunder.

  I did have a regret.

  But only one.

  I regretted not making my father pay for what he did to us. All those years he spent living like a king, he never suffered any consequences for his actions. In my eyes, he’d committed a crime against us and got away with it.