by Nita Brooks
“I didn’t want it to come back like this. We can figure out how to make things work with him and Jacob if we have to. We don’t have to work with his network.”
He stepped away from her. Again. “Except his network has made the best offer. They have the best distribution.”
“There are other offers. Nathan, let’s talk about it.”
“The time for talking has passed. The time for talking was when I asked you about Jacob’s dad and you said he wasn’t in the picture. When I told you I love you and asked you to marry me. When Judy told you the name of the network executive who wanted to meet you.” The anger in his voice rose with every word. “But you didn’t talk to me, did you, Yvonne. You decided it was better to keep the secret.”
She reached for him. “Nathan, please, I love you.”
His eyes met hers. They were filled with hurt, and pain. “I love you, too, Yvonne. I just can’t be around you right now.”
Her throat thickened with tears, but her eyes stayed dry as Nathan turned and marched out of the kitchen. Every step he took was a steel toed booted kick to her heart, but she couldn’t force herself to ask him to come back. Not when she’d screwed things up. Her front door opened, then slammed shut. Yvonne flinched. She had no idea how to fix this.
Chapter 6
Only Jacob’s smile kept Yvonne from slamming the door after she walked into her mom’s house to pick him up the next afternoon. The day had been hell, as expected. Nathan hadn’t called her. She couldn’t bring herself to call him. What would she say? Please talk to me. Don’t leave me and Jacob. Tell me that you do still love me. All of that was begging, and she did not beg.
If he needed time to get his thoughts together on this, then she’d give him time. She needed time, too. She’d dreamed last night. Dreamed about good times with Richard mixed in with good times with Nathan. She wasn’t sure what the dreams meant, but she didn’t like that her perfectly arranged life was now completely gutted. Walls smashed, widows broken, the foundation cracked. She hadn’t signed up for this. Taking that money was supposed to be the end of her dealings with Richard and everything he brought out in her.
On top of that she’d gotten a call from Lashon asking if Yvonne and Nathan had made a decision about a joint article. She’d said yes, but after the night before she wasn’t sure if there would still be a Nate and Vonne to promote. She hoped there would be. When she’d tried pitching the idea of continuing to contribute just with her decorating tips, Lashon’s response was lukewarm at best.
When had that happened? Would her own influence diminish if Nathan broke things off with her? Would all the people who she thought believed in her now abandon her? That wasn’t anything new.
“Mommy!” Jacob jumped up from where he’d been playing with the new super hero action figures Valerie had gifted to him, and ran to Yvonne.
She swept Jacob up into her arms and squeezed him tight. The frustration from her argument with Nathan, fears for the future, and the mess of her life eased a bit as she cuddled her baby boy.
Yvonne pulled back to consider Jacob’s smiling face. She had to protect him. She wouldn’t allow Richard’s return to hurt her son. “Are you being good for Grandma?”
“Mostly good,” Jacob said with a cute devilish smile. “She said I couldn’t go outside until you got here. Can I go out now?”
“Just in the backyard.” Yvonne stood and kissed his forehead. “You can call over the fence to see if Jaden wants to come out and play.”
“He’s out. I heard him earlier.” Jacob turned and ran toward the back of the house.
Yvonne followed more slowly. By the time she reached the kitchen, the screen door was slamming back into place behind Jacob. Her mom stood by the sink rinsing off dishes and putting them into the rack to dry. Rochelle’s short hair cut was shorter and shinier, which meant today had been a salon day. She wore a Word of God Family Day t-shirt and jean shorts that stopped at her knees with the corner of a dish towel tucked through one of the belt loops.
“Thanks for picking him up from school today,” Yvonne said. She pulled out one of the wooden chairs at the dinette table and sank into the seat. She kicked off her heels and leaned back in the chair with a heavy sigh.
“I don’t mind at all,” Rochelle said. She put the last dish in the rack and dried her hands on the towel through her belt loop. When she turned to Yvonne she frowned. “What’s wrong with you?”
“Why can’t my life work out the way I want it to?”
She’d started the sketches for the Covington home, and worked on some proposals for a few other projects today. Work had helped get her mind off the fight with Nathan and Richard’s demands. She drowned herself so deeply in work she’d looked up and realized she wouldn’t have been able to pick Jacob up from school on time. Which is why she’d called her mom to help.
Rochelle grunted and lifted one of her brows. “Is this about the problem you have with Nathan?”
Yvonne stiffened and met her mom’s gaze. “What problem with Nathan?” She wasn’t prone to freak outs, but her fight with Nathan was less than twenty-four hours ago. Her mom shouldn’t know that. No one should. She hadn’t even called Valerie, even though her sister would be the first person to help her list the pros and cons of her next steps.
“He came by here to drop off something for Jacob this afternoon. He didn’t say much, but I got the feeling he expected something from me.”
“Like what?” She sat up and leaned forward. Anticipation making her heart race. He’d come by her mom’s house. Did that mean he wasn’t ready to call off their engagement?
“Who knows?” Rochelle’s tone was baffled. “Men only poke around when they think there’s a problem.” She nailed Yvonne with a stare. “What’s the problem?”
“Jacob’s dad is back.” The words rushed out of her along with the glimmer of hope Nathan coming to her mom’s house meant they weren’t over. Talking this out with her mom wasn’t the ideal situation, but she was about to explode under the pressure of keeping this inside. She couldn’t ignore Richard or his request.
“Back? The way I see it he was never here. How can he be back?” A lip twist and eye roll accompanied Rochelle’s sarcastic answer.
Yvonne quickly recounted the events of yesterday. The offer for the show, Richard making the offer, his request to see his son. “He didn’t realize he was an absentee father.”
Rochelle crossed her arms and gave Yvonne a don’t-be-ridiculous look. “Huh?”
Yvonne took her hair out of the ponytail that held it back. A headache brewed in her temples. Her family hadn’t known about the payoff. She hadn’t bothered to contradict her mom’s assumption she’d gotten pregnant by some asshole who wanted nothing to do with her or the baby. It had been close enough to the truth, or what she’d thought was the truth, that arguing about the details had seemed pointless. Keeping the secret was pointless now that everything was coming to a head.
She told her mom about the fifty-thousand-dollar payoff from Richard’s father, and Richard’s claim he had nothing to do with giving her the money.
“Well, damn,” Rochelle said shaking her head. “I always wondered what was the story with Jacob’s father. I knew it couldn’t be good, but I didn’t expect it to be this . . .”
Bad. Embarrassing. Stupid. Yvonne could only imagine the words her mom wanted to use. “You never asked about him.”
“Because I recognized the look.”
“What look?”
“The he-don’t-want-me-or-my-child look.” Rochelle’s reply carried the weight of her failed marriage in her voice. “I wore the same look when my husband left me and then when your father moved away.”
Yvonne tried to hide her shock by leaning her elbow on the table and cupping her chin in her hands. Rochelle had never hidden her disappointment about her failed marriage. She also never failed to direct the fault back at Yvonne. If she hadn’t gotten pregnant with Yvonne after her husband had a vasectomy, then maybe she could have
gotten away with her mistake and still be married. Especially since her ex-husband had made his first million a year after their divorce.
“I don’t know if I should believe him.” Yvonne brought the conversation back to her problems before Rochelle hijacked the topic. “How did he not know?”
“If he owns a network along with other businesses, then he’s probably filthy rich. Fifty thousand dollars to him is like fifty cents to us.”
“Do you think I should believe him?”
“I think you should find out more.”
“I don’t want to talk to him.”
“What you want doesn’t matter. The man already has access to you and the business you’re trying to start with Nathan. He’s already used you once, don’t let him use you again. Find out what he wants. Let him help support Jacob.”
“I don’t want him anywhere near Jacob.” Yvonne said with a slash of her hand. “We don’t need him. Jacob has me and Nathan now. We know Jacob, what he likes, doesn’t like, and what’s best for him. Richard doesn’t know me or my son.”
“His son.”
“Really, Mom?” Yvonne’s voice rose with her disbelief.
“Well, it’s the truth. He’s the boy’s father.”
“Just because he donated a sperm doesn’t mean he can come in and tell me what’s best for Jacob. I can’t trust him.”
“I’m not telling you to trust him right off. I’m telling you to take the time to find out what he wants. He’s obviously got money, maybe he can do more for Jacob.”
“What about Nathan?”
“What does Nathan have to do with this?” Rochelle sounded truly confused.
“Everything. We’re getting married. Jacob is starting to call him daddy.”
Rochelle’s searching gaze bore into Yvonne. “You and Nathan are a separate thing from Jacob and Richard. The most important thing to you should be your kid. You need to find out what Jacob’s dad really wants before you let him anywhere near your son. If you figure out he really didn’t know, and really only wants to be a part of his son’s life, then let him. If you figure out he’s back for other reasons . . .”
“Reasons like what?” Destroying Yvonne’s life seemed like a good reason, but she wasn’t conceited enough to believe that was his intent.
“Like getting between your legs again,” Rochelle said without batting an eye.
Yvonne sputtered for a few seconds before words could form. “That’s not happening.”
“Easy to say when you’re pretending like you can ignore him and make him go away. I don’t know this Richard, but he sounds like he’s used to getting what he wants. Sure, he left his fiancée before he met you,” Rochelle make air quotes with her fingers with the word left. “But I doubt it. He was probably sleeping with both of you at the same time. Now he’s divorced, you’re a little bit famous, and he wants a piece of that pie again. Don’t ruin what you have with Nathan because you get caught up in memories of old lust.”
“I love Nathan.”
Rochelle crossed her arms on the table. Her stare sharpened. “Do you?”
“How can you even ask me that?”
“Because I thought I loved my husband until another man came along. Then I realized I was content with being comfortable, but I wasn’t in love. That’s one of the reasons I slept with your dad. I thought we would both start over together. Build a new life, but in the end, he just wanted a little fun. I messed up what I had with a good man and look where it left me. Struggling to take care of two kids. Ridiculed by the people who were supposed to be my friends. Don’t make the same mistakes I did.”
“You always assume I’m going to mess up. I’m not. I know what I’m doing.”
Rochelle grunted and tapped the table with her nail. “You knew what you were doing back in D.C. too, but you still ended up back here, pregnant, and tossed aside by the man who was supposed to love you. Don’t do it again. Find out what he wants, and if it is only to be a better father, let him. With no other benefits to your reconnection.”
“What if what’s best for Jacob is letting Richard back in our lives.”
“Then you let Jacob have a relationship with his father and you do everything in your power to make sure your relationship with Nathan is strong. Nathan is a guy you can depend on. Richard doesn’t sound like he’s cut from the same cloth. Don’t let your body get you into trouble.”
* * *
Later that evening, when Jacob asked if Nathan was coming over, Yvonne decided that was a good time to distract him by pretending to be the “Tickle Witch” and chase him around the living room. Jacob giggled as he tried to avoid her tickle fingers. Yvonne hopped around with a broomstick between her legs as she chased him to claim her tickles.
That was followed by a pillow fight. She didn’t argue when he picked the yellow satin goose down accent pillow off the couch. The stitching didn’t hold up past four good hits, and soon feathers flew around the living room. They were both giggling, and when the Tickle Witch tried to claim more tickles from Jacob, Yvonne slipped and fell back onto the couch. Feathers flew, and Jacob lunged onto her. The air whooshed from her lungs, but she wrapped him in her arms.
The weight of the day melted away. She breathed in the sweet mixture of bubble bath and his childish scent. She hugged him tight. No matter what happened she’d protect this. She’d make sure Jacob was always happy, giggling, and surrounded by love.
The doorbell rang. “Nathan!” Jacob cried happily.
Her heart jumped from warm and content to racing and anxious. She detangled her limbs from Jacob’s. Her racing heart reached NASCAR speed levels when she saw Nathan on the other side. She barely stopped herself from clutching her chest with relief and throwing her arms around his neck after opening the door.
“I came to say goodnight to Jacob,” he said.
His hair was dark, she suspected still damp from where he’d taken a shower before coming over. With the late spring sun behind him, she couldn’t read his thoughts when their eyes met. His eyes were guarded, his expression neutral. Yvonne wanted to reach for him, pull him close, know they were going to be okay.
Instead she stepped back and held open the door. “He just asked about you.”
The corner of Nathan’s mouth lifted. Yvonne’s heart clenched in her chest. That had to be good, right?
“Then I came right on time.”
“I was worried you wouldn’t come back,” she said. “Ever.”
Nathan blinked several times. He stepped in, stood close enough for her to smell the woodsy fragrance of the soap he used. “I wouldn’t just disappear like that.”
She wanted to believe him. “Are you sure?”
“I’m sure.” His voice was low. Sincere. He brushed the back of his hand across her cheek. “We’ll talk.”
She nodded. She was just glad he was here. That Richard’s return hadn’t completely derailed her future. At least, not so far.
“I’d like that,” she said.
His pulled a feather from her hair “What’s this?”
“Pillow fight after a round of tickle witch.”
He smiled a smile that made her heart squeeze. “Sorry I missed that.”
Nathan went farther into the house. Jacob called out his name as soon as Nathan entered the living area. Yvonne grinned as she listened to Nathan greet Jacob. When she entered the living room Nathan already had Jacob up and draped over his shoulder, Jacob giggling and laughing the entire time.
They went through the bedtime routine. Yvonne cleaned up as much of the feathers as she could while Nathan read a story. She sang “Rock-A-Bye Baby.” Afterwards, Yvonne took two beers out of the fridge and put them on the coffee table. She and Nathan settled on the couch with their beers after Jacob was asleep.
“You didn’t call me all day,” Yvonne said.
Nathan took a sip of his beer. He sighed and scratched at the label on the bottle. “I was busy today.”
“Busy? You’ve never been too busy to call me befo
re.” Nathan called her every day during his lunch break. He said it was because he couldn’t let a day pass without hearing her voice. She tried to take solace that he was here now. That the stubble on his chin meant he’d showered but didn’t shave because he was in a hurry to get over to see her.
“This redevelopment project we’re working on has got a lot of challenges we weren’t expecting. The wiring is screwed up, the plumbing is old, and they’ve got termite damage in the basement.”
“But that’s not the reason you didn’t call me,” she said.
Nathan nodded slowly. “That’s not the reason. I was upset about what you told me last night.”
“That I met with Richard without telling you, or something else?”
He focused on the edge of the label on the bottle he continued to scratch with his thumb. “Mostly the former.”
“I know I shouldn’t have kept this a secret. I was in shock. I’m still in shock. I don’t know how to process him being back, his claims about his family hiding Jacob from him, or what I should do about him wanting to be back in Jacob’s life. I’m sorry I didn’t say anything beforehand, but I had to know what he wanted. I had to make sure he wasn’t dangling an offer for our show in front of us just to try and get back at me.” She placed a hand on his knee. His muscles were tense beneath even though his expression revealed nothing. “Do you feel differently? Knowing the truth about my relationship with Richard?”
Nathan put the beer on the coffee table then covered her hand on his leg with his own. “It’s a surprise. Everyone has a past and it wasn’t as if I didn’t know Jacob’s father was out there somewhere.” The tension slowly released from his body as he took a long breath. “Do I need to be worried?”
His eyes met hers. Eyes that usually looked at her with open trust, love, and admiration. The hesitancy in his gaze was like a pair of scissors in her chest. Sharp and painful. She didn’t want to hurt him.
She shook her head and tightened her grip on his leg. “Not at all. This is only about Jacob. Richard and I are history.”