Redesigning Happiness

by Nita Brooks

  Her mom stepped forward and lowered her voice. “I saw the look you two shared. Don’t be stupid, Yvonne. You’ll ruin things with Nathan if you keep making cow eyes at Richard.”

  “I’m not making cow eyes.”

  “Oh, should I call them how-fast-should-I-spread-my-legs eyes?” Rochelle said with a haughty air.

  Yvonne closed her eyes and pressed a hand to her temple. Tension tightened her neck. “Mom, stop looking for trouble where there isn’t any. Richard and I are through. We’re only trying to make things work for Jacob. Stop expecting me to mess up.”

  “Women make dumb decisions for a good-looking man. You’ve already fallen for him once. I’m going to make sure you don’t fall again.”

  “I love Nathan.”

  Her mom tilted her head to the side. “Funny how you keep saying that. Who are you trying to convince? Me or yourself?”

  Richard came back into the living room. Yvonne avoided eye contact. She was not in need of convincing. If she didn’t love Nathan she wouldn’t have said yes. Wouldn’t have wished he’d been there every night to stand between her and Richard.

  “I’m going to go back to my hotel now,” Richard said. “Thank you for letting me spend time with him.”

  Yvonne nodded. “Of course. Nathan gets back tomorrow. We can talk about some type of visiting plan,” she said.

  Richard looked ready to argue. Rochelle cleared her throat and raised a brow. His jaw clenched. The look he threw her said they weren’t done with this conversation.

  “Sure,” Richard said. “I’ll call you tomorrow.”

  “Nice meeting you, Richard,” Rochelle said, her tone glacial.

  Richard nodded stiffly and went to the door. Yvonne glared at her mom then walked him out.

  “Look, Richard, about my mom.”

  “Don’t worry about it. I get it. I’m the guy who was absent for six years. She doesn’t trust me.”

  “Give her time.”

  “I’m not worried about her.” His dark eyes bored into hers. “I want you to trust me again.”

  She couldn’t give him an answer. Not one he’d want to hear. She wasn’t sure if she could trust Richard again. Not the way she once did.

  He opened his mouth as if to say something, but then he shook his head. “Good night, Yvonne.”

  Chapter 13

  “Yvonne, you’ve outdone yourself! I love this design.” Sandra held up the sketch for her bedroom design in the light streaming in through the windows in her sunroom.

  Yvonne smiled while mentally doing a fist pump. She’d stayed up past midnight to finish the design. She could have been done with the design within an hour of Jacob going to bed, but her mind had wandered and circled around the events of the evening multiple times.

  Then there was the dream. Why did dreams have to be so confusing and outlandish? The dream started with her grilling hamburgers in her backyard while watching Jacob and Nathan toss the baseball. She’d been happy and content. Safe. Then in a way that only happened in dreams she’d been back in her old apartment in D.C. while Richard apologized over and over in her ear.

  I’m sorry. I never should have left you. I love you.

  She’d woken up crying and confused. Basically, her life was a big ole mess when just a few weeks ago it had been perfectly organized, planned and patterned.

  “I wouldn’t have thought I’d be okay with neutral colors, but you’ve made them work,” Sandra continued. She was studying the paper and apparently hadn’t noticed Yvonne’s attention had drifted off. Again.

  “The room speaks for itself,” Yvonne said. “The high ceilings and those bay windows overlooking the connected stone patio are what make the room. There’s no need to detract from that with an over-the-top design.”

  Sandra lowered the sketch to her lap. “You’ve done a fantastic job. I heard you were the best interior designer in Atlanta, but you’ve proven it. How would you like to be on my show?”

  Yvonne blinked several times. “To talk about the design?”

  “No, to talk about your business. How you’ve built an empire as a single mother and what tips you’d give for other women looking to do the same.”

  The offer was almost too good to be true. She’d hoped for some publicity working with Sandra. Thought maybe Sandra would recommend her to some of her colleagues in the talk show business, maybe even mention Yvonne Cable designs had handled her new home decorations, but she had not expected an offer to go onto the show.

  “Me and Nathan?” she asked, remembering Lashon’s insistence that readers wanted to hear from them both.

  Sandra’s brows drew together. “No, just you.”

  Yvonne relaxed. “I’d love to, but why?”

  “What do you mean, why?” Sandra said as if Yvonne had asked why the ocean is salty. “I just told you why.”

  “What I mean is, why me? We’ve only been working together for a short time. I’ve done the sketches, but the designs aren’t complete. There’s still plenty of time for you to change your mind about the work.”

  “Are you saying your work is going to suck in some way later?”

  “No. I’m very capable of completing the work, and I’m very confident you’ll be happy, but you don’t know that. This is the first time we’ve worked together. You don’t know me very well and your show reaches thousands. I’m pretty sure you don’t offer your platform up to just anybody.”

  “You aren’t just anybody,” Sandra said, flinging the sketch onto the coffee table with the rest of Yvonne’s preliminary designs.

  Yvonne pursed her lips and watched Sandra with wary eyes. Okay, apparently, she’d hit some sort of sore spot. Not sure why, but having dealt with temperamental clients who were prone to outbursts and outlandish demands, she remained calm. Sandra hadn’t shown any signs she would be that way. Yvonne suppressed a groan. She didn’t need any more drama in her life.

  Sandra unclenched her hands and relaxed her shoulders. “I’m sorry. I get really . . . upset when I hear women downplay their talents. You’re right, I don’t offer my platform to just anybody, but I would say you’re an exception. You’ve built a successful business, you’re sought out, you even stole the show during Celebrity Housewives, which led you to launch your own home renovation show with an equally successful and handsome man.”

  When Sandra put it like that, she did sound like a pretty good guest for her talk show. If only Sandra knew how askew her life really was, she’d be the last person sought out for advice.

  Best not to bring her personal life into this. Sandra’s offer was about extending her professional reach. Being on the show was a good thing. Especially since she wasn’t sure if she’d be able to convince Nathan to accept the W.E.W. deal. Something else she’d thought about last night. Richard’s deal was the best deal for them.

  “I think your story could be a real inspiration,” Sandra said.

  “I don’t know about inspirational, but if my story can help another person on the way to achieving their dreams then I’m happy to share.”

  “Exactly! And I know you don’t like getting too personal, so I won’t ask any questions that are too probing. I want this to focus on you, even though people do love you and Nathan as a couple. You two are one of a kind. Deciding to wait until marriage. The love is apparent between you two whenever you’re together.”

  Sandra watched Yvonne closely. Too closely. This must be how the guests on the show felt whenever Sandra analyzed them.

  “Don’t make it sound like a fairytale,” Yvonne said. “We’ve got our struggles just like anyone else.”

  “But some people would say your relationship gives other women hope. You have it all. The elusive standard so many women try to achieve.”

  “I don’t have it all,” Yvonne said quickly. “Having it all is a myth. All I have is a plan I’ve stuck to and a whole lot of luck that got me this far. Everything I have can just as easily disappear. One decision, one wrong move, one unexpected encounter, and poof everyth
ing I have is gone.”

  Sandra’s eyes sharpened. “Are you referring to your business, or your relationship with Nathan?”

  Damn! She’d said too much. “Not one or the other,” she answered carefully. “A freak accident or one bad review and my business could plummet.”

  “But you and Nathan seem so secure. You two just got engaged. It’s too soon for trouble.”

  Yeah. Tell that to Richard. He had to have picked the most difficult time to pop back up. Then she remembered the elation on his and Jacob’s faces and couldn’t regret his return.

  “You’ve been a talk show host for years. You know that trouble is always around the corner in relationships. All you can do is work to get through things. Nathan and I are a team and we can handle whatever comes our way.”

  “Because you love each other?”

  Because she had to make this work. She’d made a promise to be his wife. She wanted the future he’d promised her.

  What about the future you thought you’d lost?

  She ignored that thought. “Of course!”

  Sandra sighed and stared out of the window. “I admire what you and Nathan have. My parents were not a good example of a healthy marriage.”

  “Parents are people. They struggle just like we do.” That was something she’d told herself over and over, whenever her mother predicted how much she or her sister would screw up their lives.

  “That’s very true. My mom, I love her, but she stuck with my dad despite him spreading the word,” she made finger quotes, “to every woman who looked his way, if you know what I mean. I know he had at least one child outside of their marriage.”

  Yvonne blinked. “Oh . . . I didn’t know.”

  Sandra waved a hand. “I don’t really talk about it on my show, even though it’s not like he’s exceptional. Unfortunately, what he does is also done by men and women all over the world. That’s why I respect what you have. I know you were raised by a single mother and you’re one yourself, but you’ve found an exceptional man. If you listen to the so-called experts, women like you and me, from dysfunctional families or independent single mothers, will never find love.”

  “Those experts don’t know everything,” Yvonne said.

  Sandra laughed. “I agree. Keep doing what you’re doing. I can tell you’re going to hold on to what you’ve got but you won’t change who you are just to cling to it. You aren’t someone who’ll settle for less, and that’s what I mean by saying you have it all. You want love, fulfillment, and happiness, but you also didn’t let that stop you from getting where you are today.”

  She wanted stability, a father for her son, companionship. Love—well, that had been a nice bonus. She wouldn’t mind a little passion, excitement, and deep soul-stirring need. She hadn’t exactly found those with Nathan, but she was sure they were there. Beneath the surface. Waiting to come out.

  How many months until the wedding?

  She had a flash of her dream. The confusion she’d woken up to. She sighed. April was too far away.

  * * *

  You aren’t someone who’ll settle for less.

  Sandra’s comment chased Yvonne like a bloodhound hunting a rabbit all afternoon. She’d never settled. She hadn’t settled when her high school guidance counselor told her she was being sentimental by majoring in interior design so she could create happy spaces, and should consider engineering instead. She hadn’t settled when the first three banks refused to offer her financing to start Yvonne Cable Designs. She hadn’t settled when the man she’d dated before Nathan told her she was too independent, and no man would put up with her attitude and her kid. She’d pushed, worked hard, never given up, and she’d succeeded.

  She’d majored in interior design. Opened her own business. Met a man who loved her and got along with her son.

  So why did Sandra’s words bother her so much? Why couldn’t she shake the feeling that she was on the verge of settling?

  Because you’re ready to give up the deal of a lifetime to spare Nathan’s feelings.

  She stared at the multicolored scattering of Post-its, colored pencils, and fabric swatches on her desk. All blended and mixed together no matter how much Bree tried to organize them for her. Messy, disorganized, with no structure, just like her life. Her life with Jacob, her engagement to Nathan, their joint home renovation show, and Richard’s return were jumbled together, but every piece still necessary. A part of her appreciated the sudden, and unexpected, change in her life. Her son would know his father. Their show could be successful.

  Her cell phone rang, snapping her out of her wandering thoughts. Her sister’s name was on the screen. She snatched it up and answered before the call went to voicemail.

  “Mom says you’re one step from ruining everything. So, I’m calling to find out what’s really going on.” Valerie’s voice was filled with humor.

  Yvonne rolled her eyes and pushed back from her desk. “I am not about to ruin anything, but listen, I’m glad you called. I need to talk something out.”

  “Okay, shoot.”

  Yvonne rapped her fingers on the desk. “Would it be weird to accept Richard’s offer for our show?”

  “Weird . . . no.”

  “But it would be . . .” She waited for her sister to continue with whatever thought she had in her mind.

  “It might make things complicated.”

  Complicated. Okay, she could accept that. “But if I’m going to do this. If we’re going to do this, shouldn’t I consider the best option moving forward? If Richard wasn’t involved we would have signed the deal the second it came over.”

  “True, but Richard is involved. You’re still getting to know him again after years apart. He’s still getting to know you and Jacob. Why throw in a further complication?”

  “Because I want to do this. At first I was hesitant, but now I like the idea. I’m excited about the chance to grow Yvonne Cable Designs. This show could lead the way to getting my own line of home decorations in stores, more clients, and a broader reach. I’ve worked too hard to settle for second best just because my ex is involved.”

  Valerie was quiet for a moment. “Fine. I agree with you on that. But here’s the big question. Is Nathan going to go for it?”

  Yvonne leaned back in her chair. That was the game-winning question. Nathan didn’t trust Richard. He didn’t like how she’d kept her history with Richard a secret. Though he was just as eager to get their show on television, male pride could step in and make him refuse to take money from Richard. No matter how indirectly the money would come.

  “I can convince him.” She infused her voice with confidence.

  “Mmmhmm.” Valerie didn’t buy it. “I was hoping to have a little excitement or drama in your relationship with Nathan. Looks like I’m going to get it.”

  Yvonne laughed and stood. She paced to the window. “Why would you want drama in my relationship? You detest drama. Speaking of which, I saw Eva’s not quite subtle way of throwing shade at her boyfriend on Facebook. Is she trying to ruin his political career?”

  “Sometimes I think she is,” Valerie said. “I told her she was an idiot for putting him on blast like that. People know they’re dating and are following her posts. She doesn’t care. I think that will end soon.”

  “So why are you looking for drama on my end? You have enough with your bestie.”

  “My bestie is nothing but drama all the time. It’s her normal. You and Nathan, on the other hand, are too perfect.”

  Hold up? What? That was a first from her sister. “We are not too perfect. What does that even mean anyway. If a couple is happy then they’re too perfect?”

  “No, but you two just fell into each other. There hasn’t been an argument between you. He was super ready to step in and be your Mr. Deeds.”

  “My what?” Yvonne laughed.

  “You know. Wesley Deeds from that Good Deeds movie. The guy who swooped in and saved that struggling single mother.”

  “He did not swoop in and save
me.”

  “But he was super ready to be your ideal man and Jacob’s daddy and, despite all your I-don’t-need-a-man talk, you were super ready to settle for the picturesque life and future he painted for you two.”

  There was that word again. Yvonne gripped the phone with one hand and put the other on her hip. “I’m not settling for any future he painted for us. Why would you say something like that? I thought you were happy for me?”

  “Hold up, I am happy for you. I’m just pointing out that you two were both more than ready to make a family.”

  “Well you don’t sound very supportive. You sound like you’re expecting something to go wrong.”

  “Well I’m not,” Valerie said in a voice that was about as convincing as Jacob when he said he hadn’t snuck an extra cookie even though it stuck out of his pocket. “You two are like this perfect couple who are bent on creating a new spin on southern sophistication, and I get that it’ll help sell your show, but come on, Yvonne, we both know you aren’t into putting on a front.”

  Bree walked past Yvonne’s door. Her steps slowed. She looked in, caught Yvonne’s eye, smiled, and hurried along. Yvonne crossed the room and closed the door. She hadn’t told her employee about Richard. She hadn’t told anyone outside of the family. She wasn’t ready to put that on blast. To be honest, she wasn’t sure how the admission would affect her and Nathan’s image or their show. How keeping Richard’s return a secret kind of played into Valerie’s assumption.

  “It’s not a front. Nathan and I want the same things. Marriage, trust, stability. I’ve finally met a guy who’s serious about being a grown up. He takes his responsibilities seriously and he won’t bail out on me when things get tough. He’s ready to stick beside me and Jacob as we figure out how to make things work with Richard.”

  “Look, I’m sorry if I inadvertently pissed you off. I am happy for you, and I do like Nathan. I’m just warning you that if you think Nathan is just going to roll over and say ‘yes, let’s take your ex-boyfriend’s offer,’ you might have your first disagreement on your hands.”

  “Nathan listens to me.” And he’ll understand this. Nathan was the picture of understanding. He was above the petty. No silly sense of masculine pride would convince him to take a lesser offer.