Meows, Magic & Elves

by Madison Johns

  “Not so far, but I’m calling the police in Grand Rapids to ask a few questions.”

  “Lucy’s granddaughter is from Grand Rapids,” Petunia fretted.

  “I’ll be in touch.”

  Petunia closed the door behind the sheriff and walked into the kitchen. She carefully dipped a finger into one of the cups of hot chocolate and put it to her lips, enjoying the fragrance and taste. She held the warm cup in her hands and took a heady drink. She sighed in enjoyment. It was the best hot chocolate she’d ever tasted. She almost wished the elves hadn’t run off so quickly, even though she wasn’t certain she was ready to see them.

  “Are you planning to go out or drink the hot chocolate Aunt Maxine made before she left?” Pansy asked. “I’d rather not hang around with elves on the loose.”

  Of course Aunt Maxine must have made the beverages. It was silly to think that elves could do it.

  “Oh, afraid of elves are you?” Petunia asked lazily.

  “Why would that shock you? All I can think about is garden gnomes when I think about what the elves might look like, and that freaks me out. So can we please leave?”

  “I think the elves have already left.” Petunia opened the back door and pointed out the tiny tracks in the snow.

  “Are those Merlin’s tracks?”

  “They can’t be. He’s been at Noah’s house. And it’s snowing, which can only mean Merlin’s tracks would already be covered.”

  “Let’s get out of here before the elves come back.”

  Petunia threw on her warmest coat other than her parka. The parka was both cumbersome and unsightly, at least for Petunia. She didn’t care what people in town thought generally, but it was the holidays.

  She rustled through the bottom of the closet and came back with a red sweater … a pet sweater.

  “We’ll leave after I put this on you, Pansy.”

  Pansy backed up, his eyes widening as if he saw the elves. “Oh no you don’t! I’m not going around looking ridiculous.”

  Petunia examined the small sweater and shrugged. “It looks fine to me. Look, it even has a Santa stitched on the back.”

  “I’m not that kind of cat. Now you can put a sweater on a dog because they don’t have taste, but being a feline is something to be proud of. I can’t let people think I’d let you put that on me or that I’d be comfortable being paraded around town wearing it.”

  “You wore one not long ago,” Petunia reminded him.

  “Don’t remind me. Besides, you’ll be carrying me because I’m not about to set one paw in the snow.”

  “Now look here, it’s either the cat sweater or nothing.”

  “I’m not compromising, Red.”

  “Neither am I. You wear it or stay home to greet the elves when they get back.” Petunia pushed a finger into her cheek. “Do you think elves have sharp teeth?”

  “I’m positive th-they don’t.”

  “Can you really be certain? You’re around their size, and since I don’t have any cookies left out for them to snack on … . ”

  Petunia removed the fur-lined hood of her coat when she stepped into the hardware store, holding Pansy under one arm. Pansy had complained nearly the entire way about suggesting that elves eat cats. Petunia didn’t want to resort to scare tactics, but she wasn’t about to let Pansy stay home. She had reservations about leaving the house unattended, but how mischievous could elves possibly be? They had proved to be great Christmas decorators, but hadn’t remained in the house. Petunia hadn’t seen the elves, but she had to believe they been there because the cats were all in an uproar.

  She sighed as she walked along the aisles, rushing past so nobody would ask her if she needed help. She’d much rather find what she’s looking for instead of asking. Petunia swallowed hard when she found the mouse and rat traps. What a horrible way to die, she thought.

  A man cleared his throat behind Petunia and she nervously turned.

  “Can I help you find something?” the young man asked as he pushed his black-framed glasses up.

  “We’re … I mean I’m looking for live traps.”

  “I imagine the mice are coming in to get out of the cold. They probably have been there for months now. Have you seen any signs of them?”

  “Only their tracks in the snow.”

  “Really, Red?” Pansy spouted off. “He’s going to think you’re an airhead.”

  “I think you must mean redhead.”

  “Tracks in the snow, you say? Hmm, where are you planning to put the mice when you catch them? You can’t just put them outside and not expect them to freeze.”

  “What else can I do?”

  “You could buy a cage to keep them for the winter and release them outside in the spring if you’re a don’t want to kill them type.”

  “Oh, what a clever idea!”

  “We have several live-catch traps,” he set one on the counter. “You bait the trap here,” he pointed out. “And when the mouse goes in the trap door closes, trapping him inside.”

  “That sounds cruel.” Petunia shuddered. “And I’m not sure that trap is big enough.”

  “It’s standard size for a mouse.”

  “The thing is, I’m not sure how big the mouse is. I might have a rat.”

  The man scratched his head. “We have larger traps.” He pointed out a large wire cage. “This one is big enough to catch a raccoon.”

  Petunia swallowed hard. “I might have to think about this. I’ll come back when I make up my mind.”

  “You won’t find any other humane traps here in town. We’re the only place that carries them.”

  “The thing is, I’d rather wait it out. I’d hate to trap a mouse in any of those contraptions.”

  “It’s not likely a mouse will leave on its own unless you have cats.”

  “I have four cats actually.”

  The man looked at Pansy, who peeked from beneath Petunia’s arm. “I can’t imagine a cat being a mouser if they allow themselves to be trussed up like that.”

  “And what do mean by that exactly.”

  “Just that cats never look happy wearing pet clothing. Your cat looks really angry.”

  “Oh, so I’m not the only one who thinks cats have feelings?”

  “Not at all. I don’t care what anyone says, cats have a way of showing you if they’re happy or not.”

  “How right you are. Thank you for your help. And for not fussing at me for bringing my cat into the store.”

  He laughed. “The owner brings his cats in and lets them wander around the store.”

  Petunia nodded politely and left.

  “Why did we come here if you weren’t planning to buy anything?”

  “Because I’d feel horrible if I managed to trap an elf in one of those contraptions.”

  “I don’t see why.”

  “Because they might be Santa’s elves.”

  Pansy snickered. “I had no idea you still believe in Santa.”

  “I’m a witch. I believe in everything. You know, I think I’ll drop you back home.”

  “You mean at Noah’s house with the other cats?”

  “Whatever.”

  “Do you plan to tell Noah about your suspicions?”

  “No. He’ll think I’m crazy if I tell him elves might have come to life and decorated his house.”

  “It’s not too far of a stretch -- the you being crazy part.”

  Petunia walked into Noah’s house to the sight of him lounging on the couch covered in cats. Merlin was stretched across his lap and Gem was rubbing his chin on Noah’s arm. Sassy was batting at Noah, who merely smiled. “You’re back for your cats already?”

  “No. I haven’t been able to locate the mouse yet.”

  “No worries.” He grinned. “Are you planning to say over tonight too?”

  “No, but I might stay at Aunt Maxine’s house until I find the mouse.”

  “Seriously, Petunia, you can stay here.” He held his hands up. “I have a guest room you can stay in d
ownstairs. My room is upstairs so we won’t even run into each other unless it’s in the kitchen for a midnight snack.”

  Petunia plopped down in a chair opposite Noah. “I suppose that doesn’t sound terrible, but I think it might be better if I stayed at home until I figure out what’s gotten my cats so upset.”

  “So I’m cat-sitting?”

  “I’ll take Pansy home at least.”

  “Why doesn’t that surprise me?”

  “I’m not going home now,” Pansy wailed. “Not with elves on the loose, and you can’t make me.”

  “You have a point, I suppose, but don’t you dare stress Melvin out. He’s been overtaken with felines as it is.”

  “Oh, Pinkerton came over earlier. He seems to believe the woman we saw at the ornament store is a suspect of some sort. I’m not sure if it’s only because she claimed to be Lucy’s granddaughter,” Petunia said.

  “That doesn’t sound like a crime to me.”

  “No, but who would call the sheriff and ask about the missing woman? He wasn’t even given the woman’s name.”

  “Maybe she really is a missing person.”

  “Wouldn’t there at least be a picture of her or a name being blasted on the news?”

  “I suppose you’ll have to take that up with the sheriff.”

  “Pinkerton also told me Cora tried to press charges against me for trespassing on her property. He told her it wasn’t a crime to go over there and get my cat.”

  Noah smiled. “Why don’t we go to Hanover’s Bistro like we were supposed to do the other day?”

  “Sounds great. How long will it take you to get ready?”

  “Not long if you can kindly remove you cats.”

  “I’ll leave Pansy here since I’ll be staying overnight.”

  “It shouldn’t be that hard to get rid of a few mice.”

  “That’s what I’m hoping.”

  9

  Petunia and Noah walked into Hanover’s Bistro and sat at a table near the window. Petunia glanced out and admired the snow that glimmered on the roofs, roads and sidewalks.

  “It’s certainly going to be a white Christmas,” Petunia said.

  “It’s long overdue. I don’t mind the snow, it’s just the driving in the mess that’s the problem.”

  “At least we live within walking distance to everything.”

  “Oh and about that, it’s not safe. The walkways are very icy, so I think it might be better if I drive you around anywhere you want to go for the remainder of the winter.”

  “Wow, what a commitment. You’ll have my aunt planning our wedding soon.”

  “She does that already without any help from me.” Noah laughed.

  The server brought two diet pops and menus. “Sorry, I have a table that is being a pain,” Andrew said. “I’ll be right back to take your order.”

  Petunia turned around and glanced at the tables behind her and then at the counter. “I wonder if Cora is here.”

  “You think she’s the problem table?”

  “It wouldn’t surprise me, but I suppose I shouldn’t think like that. I should take her some rock candy over after I make it. It might sweeten her mood.”

  Noah’s brow shot up. “And you think she’ll eat anything you make?”

  “You’re right. I just wish there was a way to keep her off my back. I can’t do anything right, according to her.”

  “I don’t think that has anything to do with you being a witch either,” Noah said. “Cora is just an unhappy woman.”

  “What did you say?” Cora strutted over to them. “I’m not unhappy in the least. And I-I have plenty of friends! Why Steven and Chastity came over and put up my Christmas decorations for me. They didn’t use magic either!”

  “I didn’t use magic to put up Noah’s decorations. Didn’t you pay Steven and Chastity to put up your decorations?”

  “We’d love it if you’d join us for eggnog this holiday season,” Noah blurted out. “I’ll make sure it’s bought from the store.” He smiled. “Otherwise I’m not sure if it will be digestible. From my recollection, Petunia doesn’t know how to make eggnog.”

  Cora’s shoulders dropped a little and her face relaxed. “Thank you for the invitation, but I’d rather you come to my house. How about tomorrow evening at seven?”

  It wasn’t lost on Petunia that tomorrow was Christmas Eve.

  “We’ll be there,” Noah said.

  And with a curt nod, off Cora went.

  “What made you think of inviting Cora over after the runaround she gave us?” Petunia asked.

  “It’s the holidays, and I don’t think Cora has many friends.”

  “We should introduce her to grumpy old Ned Lewis,” Petunia suggested. “They’d be two peas in an angry pod.”

  Noah smiled. “You might have something there.”

  “Anytime I’m near Ned he grumbles at me.”

  “Like you said, they’re so much alike. Do you know where Ned lives?”

  “I hope you’re not suggesting I go near that man, not after the way he has treated me.”

  Petunia and Noah ordered and were soon discussing recent developments between bites of their hoagies.

  “You know, we haven’t spoken in-depth about my Christmas decorations,” Noah remarked. “Who do you think might have put them up?”

  “I have no idea.”

  Noah’s lips curved into to a smile. “Are you sure you weren’t somehow involved?”

  Petunia dabbed at her mouth with a napkin. “So you think I conjured up the decorations?”

  “I didn’t mean it like that exactly, but it’s certainly a strange occurrence, unless someone else is going around town putting up decorations for homeowners.”

  “Maybe it was Chastity and Steven. They put up Cora’s decorations.”

  “We could drop by the bakery and ask them. It will give us a chance to purchase pastries for later.”

  Petunia pushed away from the table. “You’d better keep it down before Aunt Maxine catches wind of me staying at your house overnight. She won’t care that it’s because I have varmints in my house.”

  “I suppose then we’ll have a broomstick wedding,” Noah smirked. “You know, instead of a shotgun wedding.”

  “How about we don’t mention the word ‘wedding’ again?”

  “I didn’t mean I wanted to marry you. Err … you know what I mean.”

  “On that note, I’ll be right back.” Petunia said as she excused herself and went to the bathroom, where she could think.

  She shouldered open the door and splashed water on her face. Petunia wasn’t so sure it was a good idea to stay at Noah’s tonight, but neither did she want to go home. She could of course, but she imagined all sorts of nightmarish scenarios, like waking up to the elves standing on her bed. Petunia knew full well Pansy would be of no use if they magically appeared.

  “That’s it,” Petunia said out loud. “The elves were magical.” No wonder they were able to easily make their way around her house with only the cats seeing them. Do cats have paranormal abilities like that? According to several authorities, animals can see and hear things that no human can. It’s something she’d have to ask her aunt about.

  Petunia parted ways with Noah at the bistro after their meal, promising to meet him back at his house so they could then head to the bakery.

  She carefully walked to Mystical Remedies. The sidewalks were shoveled, but still slippery. Petunia’s feet were snuggled comfortably in her boots. She hastened her pace when her toes began to turn numb. It was another reason to hate winter. Just because she lived in Michigan didn’t mean that she had to like winter. No one she knew did. Lake Forest had a sizable lake and ice-fishing drew crowds during the winter. The Lake Forest Country Club frowned on the crowds, though, as snowmobiles crossed the property despite the no trespassing signs near the border of the club’s property.

  Aunt Maxine was laughing when Petunia walked in the door. She was leaning against the counter with Wanda and Hazel,
who were rosy-cheeked.

  “Isn’t it a little early for a little Christmas cheer … I mean spiked eggnog?” Petunia smiled.

  “We’re not drinking eggnog,” Wanda assured Petunia. “It’s too expensive to drink every day.”

  “Which is why I whipped up a special holiday brew,” Hazel said. “You should give it a try.”

  “I’d rather not, if you don’t mind. The last time I drank anything here I began to sneeze bubbles.”

  “Do you still do that?” Aunt Maxine asked with a grin.

  “It happens more seldom than it used to, but on occasion it rears its ugly head. And usually in public, when it’s difficult to come up with a believable excuse about where the bubbles are coming from.”

  “I think by now everyone in town knows where,” Aunt Maxine said thoughtfully. “So what brings you by?”

  “Have you found the elves yet?” Wanda asked.

  “No, and I’m actually hoping I don’t. Although I do wish they’d leave my house. The cats are scared out of their minds.”

  “What a bunch of scaredy-cats,” Wanda laughed. “Are they afraid of mice too?”

  Petunia shook her head as she wrinkled her nose at the bitter-smelling brew they were consuming.

  “I’ve never had a mouse in my house. It would be crazy to come into a house with four cats,” Hazel remarked.

  “If they were mousers, yes, but that’s not the case. Which brings me to my next question,” Petunia began, “do elves have magical powers?”

  Aunt Maxine chuckled. “Of course they’re magical.”

  “How else do you think they’re able to make all those toys at the North Pole?” Hazel added with a shake of her head.

  “Does that mean they can make themselves invisible?” Petunia asked.

  “I don’t know about that, but I’ve never heard of anyone who has ever seen an elf,” Aunt Maxine said.

  “My cats certainly can see them, because they’re going bat crazy on me ever since the elves transformed from those Christmas decorations.”

  “Hold up now, we don’t know for certain that’s where they came from,” Aunt Maxine said.

  “Where else could the elves have come from?”

  “We haven’t yet established if there are any elves in town.”