Her Safe Haven

by Mia Jones

  He stopped at the desk on the pediatric floor. Thankfully everyone there knew him.

  “203,” one of them said before he could ask.

  “Thanks.”

  Kaden could hear people in the room and took some breaths to steady himself before he opened the door.

  His eyes shot to the bed. He saw Addison and the back of a doctor. The doctor moved enough for him to see Lilah. He stood at the end of her bed.

  Lilah took one look at him and held her arms out.

  Kaden was by her side instantly. He looked at the doctor.

  “Is it okay to hold her?”

  “That’s fine. We’ll move the IV over to the chair.”

  Addison followed him after he scooped Lilah off the bed and into his arms.

  He sat down and arranged her against his chest.

  “Tell me if anything is hurting you, baby.”

  Lilah pressed closer to him, tucked her face against his neck, and let the tears come.

  Everyone else quietly left the room, leaving Kaden and Lilah alone. He murmured to her and gently rubbed her back as she cried. It seemed like hours, but in truth, it was less than an hour that passed before she settled, exhausted, against him.

  Lilah reached out toward the rolling table.

  “Can I have some Kleenex, please?”

  He handed her several tissues. She wiped her eyes and blew her nose. She tossed the wad onto the table and relaxed back against Kaden. The feel of his strength and the sound of his heart calmed her better than anything.

  “Do you want to talk about it?” Kaden asked her.

  She shook her head. “Not yet.”

  “Alright, baby.”

  Lilah felt her muscles relax even more, and she felt herself slowly being pulled down into slumber.

  His hand rubbed up and down her back, putting her to sleep. He continued petting her and murmuring softly to her, keeping both her and him, calm.

  He looked up when the door opened.

  The doctor came over to them. “Good news, her scan is fine. She has a very mild concussion. She’s going to feel achy for a few days. I’ll give her some pain medicine for that. I want you or someone to be with her for the next twenty-four hours. Wake her up every three hours and have her tell you the month, or her name, or yours, just to make sure. Addison will come in to take the IV out, and then you can take her home. She’s not to come back for at least three days.”

  “I’ll be with her the whole time.”

  “I figured. I’ll send Addison in.”

  “Thank you, doctor.”

  “Take good care of her. She’s very special and an exceptional nurse.”

  Kaden nodded. “There’s no one else out there that would take better care of her than me.”

  The doctor nodded, turned, and left.

  Addison came in shortly after he left.

  “I brought her bags. Let’s get the IV out, and then I’ll help you out to the truck with her. I can always come with you and help also.”

  “I think we’re okay but give me your number just in case.”

  Addison wrote it on a piece of paper she had in her pocket and stuffed it in Lilah’s purse.

  Kaden held Lilah’s arm while Addison slipped the needle from the back of her hand. He cringed, seeing something piercing Lilah’s skin.

  “She didn’t feel it,” Addison reassured him while she placed a bandage over the site.

  “Do you want me to get a wheelchair?”

  “No, I’ll carry her. Can we take the blanket? I’ll make sure you get it back.”

  Addison waved him away. “Of course.” She turned and picked up the bags and then held the door open for Kaden. She was amazed the man didn’t look like he was carrying a hundred-pound person. She followed them out to his truck.

  Addison knew Lilah was awake when she heard her talking.

  Kaden opened the passenger door and set Lilah in the front seat. He then pressed the controls, so she was lying down and then tucked the blanket around her before putting on her seatbelt.

  He moved back and watched Addison say goodbye and set the bags on the floor.

  “Call me if you need me,” Addison reminded him.

  “You got it. Thank you.”

  Kaden got into the vehicle and noticed Lilah was asleep again. He took care getting them home, trying not to disturb her sleep.

  She roused as he was carrying her inside the front door.

  “I need a shower.”

  Kaden understood and nodded. “Okay, baby. I’ll get you clean.”

  Lilah nodded and rested her head against his shoulder.

  Chapter Seventeen

  “Baby, can you sit here while I undress you?”

  Lilah nodded. She was tired from her adrenaline crashing and the sedative they gave her at the hospital.

  He set her on the toilet lid, and quickly shucked his clothes, turned on the shower to let it warm, and then undressed her. He held her against him as he washed and conditioned her hair and then bathed her body. He ground his teeth together when he noticed all the bruises that were starting to show.

  Lilah’s legs shook as Kaden wrapped a towel around her body and then squeezed as much moisture from her hair as he could.

  Kaden wrapped a towel around his own waist and then started to blow-dry her hair.

  When her hair was mostly dry, he set her on the side of the bed and let her legs hang over the mattress.

  “Are you okay like that for a minute?” he asked as he watched her.

  She nodded and then hid her grimace as a spike of pain tore through her head. She knew she could for a moment, even though her head felt heavy and a pulse of pain was increasing.

  He was back in seconds with one of his long-sleeved shirts.

  “I don’t need that,” she murmured.

  Kaden held it up. “I thought you might want it. You once said they were the most comfortable thing you liked to wear.” He laid it at the bottom of the mattress. “I’ll set it here at the end of the bed.”

  “All I need is you.” It was the honest-to-god’s truth, she thought to herself. She watched as he walked around the room to turn off the lights and closed the drapes against the late afternoon sun.

  He lifted her, pulled back the blanket, and laid her down. He threw off his towel and slid in next to her.

  Lilah sighed when his arm came around her, and he pulled her tightly against his chest. She felt every muscle in her body relax until she felt like it would take a hoist to lift her arm. Her eyes fluttered closed.

  She felt Kaden kiss the back of her head.

  Several minutes went by. She was surprised she couldn’t sleep because she’d never felt that emotionally exhausted before. Lilah knew the only way she’d get any sleep that night was to purge the emotional firestorm raging through her.

  Kaden felt her stiffen. He knew what was coming, so he stayed quiet and waited.

  “He pulled me into a closet,” she whispered softly.

  She felt Kaden shudder, but otherwise he stayed still and silent.

  “He taped my mouth and hands and pulled me down to the floor.”

  Every word out of her mouth tightened his stomach; it made him nauseous. Every tear that escaped from her eyes tore apart his soul, bit by bit.

  “He hit me, but I kept fighting him. The thought…God, the thought of his hands on me, makes me want to scream. The only hands I want are yours.”

  Kaden bent and pressed a kiss to the side of her forehead. “I’m very happy to hear that, sweetheart.”

  Lilah sighed. “The door was jerked open before he could get my pants down to…you…know,” she stuttered.

  Kaden nodded. He didn’t want to hear the R-word either. Rape was a horrible word. There was no way around it. There was no good way to use rape in a sentence that meant anything other than what it was.

  “That’s it,” she declared in a dead tone.

  “I’m so, so sorry, sweetheart. I wish I’d been there,” he murmured against her hair
.

  “Me, too. I know I was trying to scream, but no sounds got past the tape he put over my mouth. All I could think of was that I wanted you.”

  Kaden felt tears burn his eyes. He swallowed, trying to keep them from escaping. He couldn’t remember the last time he’d cried. He held her tighter against him and whispered softly to her as she finally drifted to sleep.

  Kaden sucked in a shaky breath to help calm himself down. He couldn’t get his heart to settle. One picture after another spun through his head like an old fashion movie, one frame at a time but never stopping at just one.

  He was brought back when Lilah started to fidget and whine in her sleep. He nuzzled her and whispered soothingly to her until she calmed.

  “I’m here now, baby,” he murmured tightly. The emotions that clogged his throat from taking a deep calming breath were a mixture of rage, fear, guilt, and relief that she’d gotten away from the bastard.

  He’d never forget the sound of Addison’s voice when she had called him. He knew right away something terrible had happened.

  Kaden wondered how long it would take for him to be able to settle enough to lessen the pressure on his chest. He guessed never and wondered how he would deal with it. He’d get them through it, whatever he had to do. He’d keep her safe.

  Kaden woke Lilah throughout the night to check and make sure the concussion didn’t get worse. He’d ask her a few questions and then she slide right back to sleep.

  He slipped out of bed as the sun started to lighten the room through the drapes. He pulled on a pair of jeans and went to the kitchen to make coffee. He felt like he hadn’t gotten a minute of sleep. He’d been so worried she’d slip into a coma or start having a nightmare, and he wouldn’t hear it.

  Kaden stood at the window, sipping a cup of coffee when arms circled his waist from behind.

  He turned and set his cup down before wrapping his arms around Lilah. She was wearing the white dress shirt he’d left on the bed the night before.

  “How are you feeling?”

  Lilah rested her chin on his chest and looked up at him. “Besides a minor headache and a few aches, I’m doing surprisingly well.”

  Kaden kissed the top of her head. “I’m glad. Would you like coffee and breakfast?”

  Lilah nodded and slipped out of his arms. “Yes, and I want to help.”

  He opened his mouth, but then snapped it shut when she took out the carton of eggs and started breaking them into a bowl. He’d watch and see if she got shaky, but otherwise would let her do what she wanted.

  Kaden started on the toast. Within ten minutes, a big plate of scrambled eggs and toast sat in front of Kaden.

  “Do you want orange juice?” Lilah asked.

  “I’ll share yours. Now come here before it gets cold.”

  Lilah perched sideways on his lap and rested her back against his chest. He watched as she loaded up the fork with eggs and lifted it to his mouth.

  Kaden quickly chewed as he pulled the fork from her grasp.

  “You know this is one of my favorite things,” he reminded her as he put the fork to her mouth.

  “Everything we do is your favorite thing,” she reminded him and smiled before she took the bite and chewed.

  “Anything to do with you, yes.”

  Lilah rolled her eyes but let him finish feeding them both.

  Neither spoke as they cleaned up the kitchen. It wasn’t an uncomfortable silence; she figured they were both worn out.

  “Do you want to sit outside?” Kaden asked her.

  “With you?”

  “Of course.”

  Lilah grabbed onto the hand he held out to her. Kaden snatched up a blanket on the way to the back patio.

  He led her to their favorite lounger. It was the size of a queen-size bed. They’d spent a lot of hours in the lounger, talking, resting, and making love.

  Lilah rubbed her arms. It was in the mid-fifties that early in the morning, but she knew she’d be warm enough next to Kaden.

  He laid down and patted the place next to him. “Come here.”

  Lilah laid down, facing him with their bodies touching from head to toe. Kaden arranged the blanket over them and then tucked her tightly against his body.

  Kaden smoothed the hair from her cheek. “Are you comfortable?”

  “Yes.” Lilah nestled her head against his chest, feeling the heat come off his body and immediately warm her.

  Neither spoke for a long moment, letting the sounds of nature, the warmth of the sun, and the fact they were together relax them.

  “I want to go back to work.”

  Kaden’s head snapped up. “The doctor told me you had to be out for three days. I don’t want you pushing this. Give yourself time.”

  Lilah looked up at him. “I feel that if I don’t go back right away, I won’t be able to later.”

  Kaden’s brow puckered in confusion. “Why?”

  “I’m not sure. It’s like that saying if you get bucked off a horse, you need to get right back on. I think if I wait, my fears will get the best of me.”

  His hand ran up and down her back.

  “How about we go stop by? We’ll see your friends and let them see that you’re okay, but then we come right back home.”

  “I’d like that,” Lilah said, relieved. She’d be okay if he were with her.

  Chapter Eighteen

  Lilah puttered around Kaden’s house while he worked on paperwork in his office.

  It was a bright sunny Saturday, three weeks after the attack, and she still felt like she was drifting in limbo.

  It seemed every day that passed; her insecurities grew. It wasn’t like Kaden acted differently. He just seemed different for some reason, and she had yet to figure it out.

  Lilah walked out on the back patio. It was one of her favorite places. The patio itself was made out of slats of limestone in a gray with streaks of white that matched the house. It was large enough to hold a table with eight chairs. A small outside kitchen area with a big grill and a few lounge chairs beside their own.

  There was a neatly cut yard all around the house. The field in back of his house went on forever. Gradually trees sprouted up, and then a woodland took over the land.

  As far away from other people as Kaden lived, the sound of others and vehicles was rare. It usually brought her peace to listen to nature and relax with the sun on her face, but that day her stomach was too tight, and her heart thumped painfully in her chest.

  She had to come to grips with the fact that he didn’t want her there. It was fine when there was a threat against her, but now that Terry was behind bars with no parole, she was free to move back into her house.

  Did she want to leave? No. But Kaden had done so much for her, she didn’t want to take advantage of him.

  She wrapped her arms around herself as cold reverberated inside her even though the sun beat down at her and the temperatures were in the low eighties.

  It would be different if he loved her, if he had talked about a future together; but all the times, she hinted at it, he blew it off.

  It was time to move back to her house.

  “Hey, what are you doing out here?”

  Lilah turned to watch Kaden walk toward her. She caught his look of confusion before he blanked out his emotions.

  He pressed the heel of a hand against the middle of his chest where an ache grew. She looked so sad, sitting there by herself.

  He moved toward her and sat in the lounge chair next to her and scanned her face. She seemed to become further and further away from him as the days passed.

  He was unsure how to deal with the overwhelming feelings at the thought of losing her. Every time she brought up her house, he’d interrupt her and change the subject, but the distressed look in her eyes told him he wouldn’t be walking away today.

  “Talk to me.”

  Lilah glanced at him and then back at the trees on the other side of his property.

  “I…,” she cleared her throat. “I have to
make a decision about my house.”

  Kaden tried to relax his grip on the side of the lounge and think about how to deal with the situation. He couldn’t tie her to his bed until she fell in love with him, but the idea was tempting.

  Lilah looked at him. He knew she was waiting for him to say something, but he was at a loss.

  He watched her shoulders droop, and her gaze look over his shoulder.

  “I think it’s best if I move back.”

  And there it was. The exact thing he’d been terrified of hearing.

  “You don’t have to,” he murmured.

  Lilah’s gaze swung his way and then away.

  “I’m here because of the threat against me. That’s over with now. Is there any other reason I should stay?”

  Kaden wiped a frustrated hand down his face.

  Did he dare tell her about his feelings and take the chance he’d lose her or keep calm and hope they would still be together?

  “I…,” he started and then stopped.

  Lilah stood and stepped away from him.

  “Alright, I’m going to go start to pack.”

  Kaden stood and took a step toward her but stopped abruptly when she held him off.

  “No, I can’t handle you right now,” she said and turned and fled.

  Every step away from him, his world crumbled a little bit more.

  Lilah raced through the house to the master bedroom before she lost what little control she had.

  She had tried and failed, and it felt like her life would never be the same. In the last six months, he’d become her whole world, and now she felt like she was floundering for a hold on anything that would make her feel like she wasn’t dying inside.

  She closed the bedroom and then the bathroom doors before she slid down to the floor by the tub, pulled her knees up and wrapped her arms around them, and let loose the sobs she’d held back for so long.

  Lilah pressed her forehead to her knees. She tried to stay quiet, hoping he’d give her a little time. She didn’t want to put a guilt trip on him, but she didn’t have the strength to hold back a moment longer.