I Saved Too Many Girls and Caused the Apocalypse: Volume 13

by Namekojirushi

  “That might be true, but I...”

  I tried to object quietly, but Chelsea didn’t seem to hear me at all. Picking up the hammer together meant we had to stand next to each other. And I mean right next to each other. Any distance between us would make it hard to put our strength together. It was almost like the game had been designed just for this... Unfazed, however, Chelsea unabashedly moved closer to me. She pressed right up against me, causing a strange sensation to run up my spine. I didn’t know where to look.

  “Here we go!”

  “O-Okay!”

  “Ready, and...”

  “...!”

  When I put my back into lifting the hammer, I inadvertently leaned into Chelsea more. The indescribable sensation I felt in my spine before now shot all the way up to my brain. Out of desperation, I swung the hammer down with all my might.

  ▽

  After the hammer challenge, Chelsea and I took a breather.

  “So the prize was a stuffed animal, huh? Too bad we got the rabbit. I would have preferred the panda.”

  “Do you like pandas, Chelsea?”

  “I love them. They’re so cute. Pandas are actually a lot more ferocious than they look, you know.”

  “...”

  Was that the part she found cute? Well, people are allowed to like whatever they want, so I didn’t say anything else about it as we sat down on the stairs by the soccer field and ate our shaved ice. It wasn’t all that hot out, but I was definitely sweating after the workout I’d just gotten. Shaved ice was perfect after the hammer challenge for two.

  “It feels like we’ve gotten into a lot of fun, and we haven’t even been inside yet.”

  “Yeah. I wonder if Hibiki and the others are inside...” I murmured as I turned to look at the building behind us.

  They were certainly a rather attention-grabbing group, so they definitely would have caused a commotion if they were nearby. Since we hadn’t heard or seen anything, I could only assume they were having some kind of fierce battle over me (Hibiki) indoors.

  “It’s kind of weird to hear you say that in Hibiki’s voice.”

  “Yeah, I can see that.”

  “But nothing else really seems all that weird. You guys don’t sound all that different otherwise.”

  “Hibiki does speak in a rather masculine way, I guess.”

  Though she wasn’t nearly as commanding as President Momone.

  “Well, I’m glad I got to spend all this time with you, even under the funny circumstances. Lucky me!” Chelsea said, smiling as she played with the stuffed rabbit in her hands.

  When she put it that way... it was kind of embarrassing.

  “W-Well, I think it’s high time we go...”

  I was going to say we should go look for Hibiki, but I couldn’t even finish the sentence.

  “Rekka?”

  “...”

  I didn’t even have the leisure to answer Chelsea. I was completely and utterly occupied trying to cope with the grave phenomenon happening inside me right now. To be frank... I had to go. Cold sweat began to run down my back as I crossed my legs and tried to hold it. This was the worst possible thing that could have happened. I mean, the juice and shaved ice just now were probably a bad idea. I should’ve known better. Hibiki would give me so much crap for this... No, she would probably kill me. There was no way I could go to the bathroom in her body.

  “...”

  Just imagining it was enough to make my brain overheat in embarrassment. I literally couldn’t do it. I just couldn’t cross that line. Even if she didn’t kill me, Hibiki would never speak to me again. I’d just have to hold it... but who knew that the urge to go was so agonizing for women? I had no idea it was so much easier to cope with as a guy. Thanks, plumbing.

  “Rekka...”

  I was completely lost in my thoughts—trying to distract myself from the urge to go by thinking about anything else—when Chelsea shook me by the shoulders and made me look at her.

  “Sorry if I got the wrong idea... but do you need the restroom?”

  She apologized, but her tone of voice made it clear she was pretty certain.

  “Yeah...”

  Since I didn’t think I could hide it, I nodded honestly. Chelsea scratched at her head with a grimace.

  “Well, it’s a natural biological function, I guess. Let’s go.”

  “No, but...”

  “It isn’t good to hold it in too long. You can make yourself sick that way.”

  “I know, but...”

  I just couldn’t fold so easily on this. I really wanted to stand my ground... but I was definitely reaching my limit. I unwittingly groaned as I crossed my legs tighter and tighter. Tears started to well in my eyes. Chelsea let out an agonized sigh as she watched me suffer.

  “It’s your first time in a girl’s body, so it’s not your fault if you don’t know the tricks to holding it in, Rekka.”

  “Chelsea...”

  “I won’t even tell Hibiki. Promise. It’ll just be a secret between you and me, okay?”

  Chelsea pressed her finger to her lips and grinned mischievously, but she honestly looked like a saint to me right now. While I truly felt bad for Hibiki, I vowed to myself that I’d take this to my grave.

  “S-Sorry, Chelsea...”

  “No worries. I said you could count on me, remember? There’s probably a lot you don’t know, so I’ll help you out.”

  “Thanks... And sorry again.”

  I could barely stand on my own anymore, so Chelsea supported me as we made our way to the girls’ restroom at a turtle’s pace. All the while, R kept muttering her usual nonsense.

  “Good for you, Rekka. This event’s in the top three.”

  If someone handed me a roll of duct tape, I’d use it straight on her mouth.

  What happened afterwards was... Well, for both my sake and Hibiki’s, I won’t go into any details. Let’s just say I owed Chelsea big time.

  ▽

  Immediately following what would, without a doubt, be my greatest crisis of the day...

  “Ah, if it isn’t Hibiki and Chelsea! Hello there, you two!”

  “Hmm?”

  Just as we were able to relax, someone called out to us.

  “We just got here! I’m glad we found you so quickly!”

  “Kiri, my head is pounding after another all-nighter. Would you mind lowering the volume a little?”

  “Of course! Sorry, Director Zeta!”

  Turns out the two voices we were hearing were Kiri, who dressed in her middle school’s uniform, and Zeta, who was clutching her head. Apparently they’d just arrived at Juumonji’s festival.

  “Say, Chelsea... Do you think it’s okay to let them in on things?” I leaned over and whispered.

  “You could, but they did probably just see us come out of the women’s restroom.”

  “Good point...”

  I sighed heavily and could feel my shoulders slump. While it would just be simpler to tell them the truth, their timing was terrible. I didn’t really want anyone knowing that I’d used the bathroom in Hibiki’s body. Chelsea had made me feel at ease until now, but from here on out, I’d have to be on my guard with other people around.

  “Listen, I’ll be fine. I told you I was here for you, and I meant it. Just act natural.”

  Or so Chelsea said as she gave me a sympathetic pat on the shoulder, but...

  “...”

  What the hell did that even mean right now? Surely she meant to act like Hibiki, but... How did Hibiki normally act? The more I thought about it, the less I could remember. I was drawing a total blank in the heat of the moment.

  “Hm? What’s wrong, Hibiki? You’re making a weird face,” inquired Zeta.

  “What? No, I’m fine. Cut a guy some slack, will you? Heh heh...” I said, trying to play it cool.

  “Psst, Rekka... Watch what you say,” Chelsea quietly whispered in my ear.

  “Er, yeah! Girl... Cut a girl some slack.”

  “Okay... If y
ou say so.”

  Zeta looked at me skeptically, but didn’t press further. Her headache from not getting any sleep must have been pretty bad. She still had her hand pressed to her forehead.

  “Hibiki, Hibiki! Do you know where Rekka is?” Kiri leaned in and asked eagerly.

  I was actually right here—or at least part of me was—but I couldn’t exactly tell her that.

  “Oh, um... I’m not quite sure. He and the others kinda went on ahead.”

  “And left you and Chelsea behind? That isn’t like Rekka,” said Kiri, quizzically cocking her head to the side.

  “Uh...”

  I tried to think of a good excuse, but my mind was still almost completely blank. Thankfully...

  “Sherlyn actually kidnapped Rekka and ran off with him, and everyone else went chasing after them,” Chelsea jumped in to explain.

  “Sherlyn? Who’s that?”

  Chelsea’s skillful redirecting of the conversation saved me. I’d just about blown it, too...

  I secretly sighed in relief and thanked Chelsea over and over internally. I’d have to watch myself from here on out, and the first thing on the docket would be minding how I talked. As I went over things to say in my head...

  “Oh! Let’s try that!” Kiri suddenly shouted, pointing to a flag with ice cream on it.

  “Kiri, I said not to yell...”

  “But ice cream will fix your headache, Director Zeta! Let’s go get some!”

  “What? The ice cream on Earth can do that?”

  Whether that was actually true or not aside, Kiri seemed pretty determined to get ice cream. At her urging, we made our way over to the classroom with the sign outside that boasted handmade ice cream.

  “Welcome!”

  The classroom was filled with tables and chairs like you might find in a bodega. There was also a freezer that was packed with a colorful variety of ice cream.

  “Wah! It all looks delicious!” Kiri shouted again in awe, her eyes sparkling.

  As the sign outside said, all of the ice cream here had been made by hand. The class hosting the event had packed single-serve cups with all different kinds, labeled by flavor and price.

  “Oh, I know! We should all get different flavors!”

  “Which one works best on headaches...?”

  An enthusiastic Kiri and an unenthusiastic Zeta picked out the flavors they wanted, and Chelsea and I did the same. After checking out and getting spoons, the four of us sat down at a table together.

  “Oh my gosh, this looks so good!”

  Kiri excitedly scooped a spoonful of her ice cream into her mouth.

  “Oh my gosh, it is so good!”

  Wow, she really was worked up about ice cream. I guess that’s typical for middle school girls... Actually, I was about to write it off to her youth, but she actually sounded a lot like Iris right now. I bet she’d be just as excited about all this.

  “That hits the spot. A little something cold works wonders on a tired brain...”

  Perhaps Kiri just seemed more exuberant than usual sitting next to the haggard Zeta. Wait, no. That wasn’t a pass at her age or anything. I swear.

  “Aren’t you going to eat, Hibiki?”

  “Oh, uh, yeah...”

  “Hurry up before it gets melty!”

  Kiri cheerfully encouraged me to try mine, so I hurriedly took a bite.

  “How is it?”

  “Mine’s pretty good too.”

  “So is this orange flavor,” said Chelsea. “It’s really good for handmade, actually.”

  It was praise all around for the handmade ice cream. As I ate away at mine, I started to think I’d be willing to come back for seconds after I got back to my own body.

  “Hibiki, can I have a bite of yours?”

  “Mwuh?”

  I froze up with my spoon still in my mouth at Kiri’s sudden question. Wait, I get it. This is why she suggested we all get different flavors.

  “S-Sure...”

  “Thanks! You can try some of mine first!”

  With that, Kiri scooped some ice cream up with her spoon and held it out towards me.

  “W-Wait, what?”

  “Open up! Hurry, before it falls!”

  She’d heaped way much onto the spoon. The giant ball of frozen goodness was precariously balanced as she moved it closer to me.

  “That’s okay, Kiri! I can use my own spoon! You eat that!”

  “Nooo! If I move it any more, I’ll drop it, and it’ll be a waste!”

  There were tears welling in her eyes as she pleaded with me. Even if I told her she could still eat my ice cream after dropping her own, she probably wouldn’t accept that. She’d just scoop up more and try this all over again. That persistence was just a part of her personality. I knew this was a losing game, so...

  “H-Here goes nothing.”

  Nom.

  I ate Kiri’s ice cream, making sure to touch as little of her spoon as possible.

  “...”

  And it was just about as embarrassing as that time I had to share a couple’s drink with Hibiki.

  “Well? What do you think?”

  “Yeah, yours is good too, Kiri.”

  “Yay! Then let me try yours next!” Kiri said happily before opening her mouth wide.

  She almost looked like a cute little puppy begging for food... Maybe it was just because I was a guy, but feeding each other like this really was embarrassing. Granted, it was several degrees easier being on this side of the exchange.

  “Um, okay. Here...”

  But just as I started to scoop up some of my ice cream...

  “There you are!”

  An intruder appeared at our table, yelling loudly.

  “I finally found you! Where have you been?!”

  It was me. Or rather, Hibiki inside my body. She seemed to be... worn a little ragged.

  “Jeez, what happened to you?” I had to ask.

  “I think I finally understand what you go through on a daily basis...” she said rather earnestly.

  Hearing that honestly made me feel bad for her.

  “So, uh, I’ve kept the whole body swap thing secret from Kiri and Zeta. Chelsea knows, though,” I whispered to Hibiki.

  “Got it. It was too complicated to explain, so I kept it a secret from Sherlyn and the others too,” she whispered back.

  After that exchange, we nodded at each other in implicit understanding.

  “Hey, Rekka! It’s been a while!”

  “’Sup? Seems like you’re having another rough day. I’m investigating the next evil organization we’re gonna bust, so I’ll be counting on you again soon.”

  Kiri and Zeta both greeted “me” when Hibiki walked up to the table. Actually, what Zeta said was way more than a greeting. And she said it so casually, too... It would be weird for me to react to it while in Hibiki’s body, so I silently turned away and held my head.

  “Hibiki, Hibiki! Don’t forget!” Kiri demanded, forcing my thoughts back to the here and now.

  “Don’t forget...?”

  “We were feeding each other ice cream!” she answered cheerfully.

  Hearing that, Hibiki’s face froze up. Really, I should say my face with Hibiki behind it.

  “...!”

  She then glared at me fiercely, but when she saw how excited Kiri was about ice cream, she didn’t interrupt.

  “H-Here you go, Kiri...”

  “Hom! Oooh, delicious!”

  “Ugh...”

  A middle school girl happily eating ice cream with a frustrated high school boy watching her, fists clenched... It must have been an odd sight for everyone else. And the fact that people would think one of those parties was me was unsettling, to say the least.

  But as that scene unfolded...

  Bam!

  Someone came stomping into the classroom.

  “Hey, it’s Corona.”

  “Oh, no!”

  Upon hearing Corona’s name, Hibiki’s eyes went wide.

  “Here you are,
young man.”

  The classroom was suddenly abuzz at the unexpected appearance of a beautiful, purple-haired woman dressed in a maid uniform. The maid in question, however, paid them no mind, and she zeroed in on Hibiki. As soon as she was close enough, she snatched “me” into her arms.

  “I finally caught you.”

  “Mrgh!”

  Unable to fight against the strength of the former Demon King, Hibiki grumbled in Corona’s grasp. God, is this what I usually look like to other people? It’s no wonder my male classmates are always glaring at me.

  “Have you only just now realized how lucky of a pervert you are?” R asked, her shoulders slumping exaggeratedly.

  “Ugh...”

  As for Hibiki, she seemed unsure of how to deal with the situation. She didn’t know how much strength was appropriate for “me” to use.

  “Now, come eat those Russian takoyaki-like things with me.”

  “H-Hey... Hold on, Corona.”

  I tried to stop Corona from leaving with Hibiki in her clutches.

  “Hm? What’s wrong, Hibiki?”

  “Erm...”

  What would Hibiki say at a time like this? I agonized over what to say next, when...

  “We found you!”

  Lyun, Ellicia, and Sherlyn burst through the classroom door with enough force to break it.

  “Tch! They caught up already...”

  “I commend you for escaping a phantom thief, Rekka!”

  “Whaaat?! Now you’re touching Corona’s chest?! I’ll never forgive you for this, Nammy!”

  “It’s my first time seeing Rekka in ages, so you should all let me have a little more time with him!”

  “No way!”

  “Not happening!”

  Ellicia was shot down from every direction.

  “Come! We’re running, young man!”

  “Ah, wait!”

  This time, Corona leaped out of the classroom before anyone could stop her with Hibiki still clutched in her arms. The other three girls chased after them, leaving the rest of us in the now noisy classroom.

  “Those guys are like a storm, huh?”

  “Who was that guy?”

  “He was being chased by so many beautiful girls...”

  “That wasn’t our school uniform.”

  “Wasn’t that a Mitsuhashi High uniform?”

  “Hey, that’s the guy I saw in the hall earlier. He was being chased by pretty girls then too.”