BARR: a bay falls high novel

by Kidman, Jaxson

The door opened and Tommy smiled when he saw me.

  “Son of a bitch,” he said. “Haven’t seen you in a long time, Barr.”

  I shook his hand. “Been a while. I know. I’ve been busy.”

  Tommy looked at Mel.

  “This is Mel,” I said.

  “You and your girls…”

  “Girls?” Mel asked.

  “Tinsley,” I said.

  “So you brought her here too?” Mel asked.

  “Shit,” Tommy said.

  “Thanks, Tommy,” I said as I patted his shoulder.

  “Everyone will be happy to see you,” Tommy said. Then he looked at Mel. “For the record, he’s only brought one other girl here. Ever.”

  “How lucky of me,” Mel said. “I’m the silver medal winner.”

  “Better than bronze,” Tommy said.

  “You’ve helped enough,” I said to Tommy.

  I kept a tight grip on Mel’s hand as we walked down the main part of the club.

  I stopped and pulled Mel so she was in front of me.

  “Take it all in, love,” I whispered to her.

  Benny was on the stage, twisting this hips as he played his trumpet. Bobby was behind him, carrying the song with a thumping rhythm from his bass.

  When I looked down at Mel again, she was smiling.

  She understood it.

  What it meant. How it felt.

  The club was half packed, spilt in half between people at the bar and people at tables.

  “This is my secret spot,” I whispered to her. “Just something about it…”

  “Do you play here?” Mel asked.

  “Of course I do.”

  “Barr!” a voice cried out.

  I saw Alex holding a tray with glasses on it.

  She quickly dropped the tray to an empty table and came running at me.

  She hugged me.

  I hugged her back with one arm.

  “Hey, love,” I said.

  “How are you?” Alex asked.

  “Perfect,” I said. “What about you?”

  “Still here,” she said. She stepped away from the hug. “Can’t get away from this place. I keep telling Hank I’m going to quit but he begs me to stay. He can’t live without me.” Her eyes moved to Mel. “Look at you. You’re gorgeous.”

  “What?” Mel asked.

  “This is Alex,” I said to Mel. “She’s an old friend.”

  “We’re not old,” Alex said. “I hate that word.”

  “Far from old,” I said. “But we’ve known each other a long time. Right?”

  “Right,” Alex said.

  “I’m Mel, by the way,” Mel said.

  “Shit. Right. Sorry.” I slipped my hand around Mel’s waist. “This is Mel. This is my… everything.”

  “Ah,” Alex said, clicking her tongue. “I feel that. You two. It’s pretty intense.”

  “What’s intense?” Mel asked.

  “Don’t worry about Alex,” I said to Mel. “She collects rocks and thinks the sun gave them to her.”

  “Asshole,” Alex said. “I don’t collect rocks. There’s certain stones and gems… whatever. Are you playing tonight?”

  “No,” I said.

  “Yes,” Mel said.

  “A no and a yes,” Alex said.

  Benny let out one last loud wail on his trumpet and everyone started to clap.

  He took a bow and then spotted me.

  He hurried to put his trumpet into its case and came over.

  “Look who’s here to tear this place up,” Alex said.

  “I thought I saw a ghost for a second,” Benny said. He grabbed my shoulder. “You’re really real. Really here.” Benny eyed Mel. “And you brought company.”

  “Don’t try anything with her,” I said. “She’ll hit you.”

  “I will,” Mel said.

  “I like her already,” Alex said.

  “Get these wonderful people drinks,” Benny said. “And then clear the stage for Barr.”

  “No,” I said. “If you have a schedule…”

  “Consider it all done,” Alex said.

  She strutted away and grabbed her drink tray.

  “I was just talking about you, Barr,” Benny said. His long, aged fingers were gripped tight on my shoulder. “Telling them all how you saved me.”

  “He saved you?” Mel asked.

  “I didn’t do anything,” I said.

  “The hell you didn’t,” Benny said. He let my shoulder go and put his hand out for Mel to take. She gave him her hand. “Listen to me, sweetheart.”

  “When have you ever called anyone sweetheart before?” I asked Benny.

  He side eyed me and grinned.

  Benny was suddenly trying to be thirty years younger.

  “I was playing on street corners,” Benny said. “I was sitting in raggedy clothes. I was doing anything I could to make a few bucks and grab me a burger and a coke. You know?”

  “You were homeless?” Mel asked.

  “That I was. Lost everything in my life. Except the music. And even that… it was just noise. Just notes. I heard nothing. Until Barr came alone and told me to come here. To this place. Told me there was a stage and ears. I guess that’s all I needed.”

  “It was all him,” I said. “He’s a good trumpet player. The best trumpet player ever.”

  “Now that’s a lie,” Benny said. He squeezed Mel’s hand tighter. “I hope you can keep this one in check.”

  “Oh, I can,” Mel said. “But he better get his ass on that stage soon.”

  Benny shivered and let her hand go. “That was cold, sweetheart.”

  “Sweetheart,” I said, shaking my head. “You need a cold glass of water, Benny.”

  “With some scotch… hold the water,” Benny said.

  Alex came back as Benny slipped away, trumpet case in hand.

  “Drinks,” Alex said.

  “What kind of drinks?” Mel asked.

  “Not those kind,” Alex said. “Hank would get shut down.”

  I pointed an empty table and Alex nodded.

  I pulled out a chair for Mel and she sat down.

  When I started to sit, Alex was right there and pulled the chair away.

  If I wasn’t paying attention I would have sat and went right down on my ass.

  “What are you doing?” I asked.

  Alex pointed to the stage. “You’re up next.”

  “I’m what?” I asked.

  Mel put her elbows to the table and her chin in her hands.

  When she smiled, it was the most honest smile I could remember seeing on her face. I blinked and was taken right back to my secret room on the Brooks Crest campus. Those Christmas lights (half dead) dangling from the ceiling. She and I together. Playing the keyboard. Missing notes because we were kissing. Then just tossing the keyboard to the floor to handle other business.

  “Well, what are you going to do, Barr?” Mel asked.

  I reached for a cigarette and looked to the stage.

  I lit the cigarette and made the short walk that felt like a mile in my heart.

  As I walked up on the stage, Alex yelled out, “Let’s go, Barr!” and she let out a yell. Mel then did the same. And the rest of the place, recognizing who I was, started to clap.

  I sat behind the piano with the unlit cigarette between my lips and looked down at the keys.

  The music was always… something.

  The thing that saved. The thing that took away. The thing that I had. The thing that I lost. The thing that I just did because it was always something to do.

  I pressed my fingers to the keys and looked at Mel.

  She was still smiling.

  She chewed her lip for a quick second then mouthed something to me.

  From a distance it looked like she was saying ‘I love you.’

  Chapter 17

  (we gotta go back for a sec)

  I let Mel pace the room two hundred times.

  I relaxed on the bed, on my elbows, and enjoyed the
rest of my cigarette.

  When there was nothing left to smoke of it. I jumped off the bed and went to the window to toss it away.

  Then I waited for Mel to get within my reach and I grabbed her by the waist.

  I pulled her toward me.

  She playfully kept walking, swinging her arms.

  “This is all your fault,” she said.

  “What?”

  “Yeah. It is. I’m only doing this because of you.”

  “But you’re doing it for yourself, love,” I said. “You get to show everyone how fucking amazing you are.”

  “I don’t want to do that, Barr,” she said. “I like being invisible around here.”

  “You’re far from invisible.”

  “This is stupid. It should be you playing.”

  I turned her around and cupped her face. “But it’s not me. It’s you. They asked you. They heard you playing and want you to do this.”

  “I don’t want to.”

  “Yes you do, love,” I said. “You know you do. You heard what Levens said, right? You show off your talents and he can take you under his wing.”

  “I don’t want to fly.”

  I laughed. “You’re crazy, Mel. And perfect at the same time.”

  She punched my chest. “You did this to me. I wanted you to play piano. For me. And somehow you tricked me into playing for you. And then Levens heard it. And now I’m playing in front of five hundred people?”

  “That’s right,” I said. “And you’re going to kick ass. And every single person is going to cheer for you. And then Levens is going to help you. Train you. Whatever you want to call it. You’ll play for bigger audiences. You’ll be able to do something greater than this place.”

  “And what about you?” Mel asked.

  “I told you… I’m getting it all figured out. My time’s done here, love. It has been for a little bit. I just haven’t gone back to BFH yet.”

  “Why?”

  “I don’t think I want to,” I said.

  “What? You said…”

  I closed in on her again. “Mel, I’ll go wherever you do. It won’t matter to anyone that I do that. My parents won’t care.”

  “Yes they will. How can they not?”

  “Just trust me,” I said. “It’ll be fine. Wherever you go, I go. If I stay here and finish some classes, that’s fine. But if you can get into a music school… I’ll be right there.”

  “In the same school?” she asked, her eyes going wide.

  “I don’t know about that.”

  “Barr, you’re so much better than me.”

  I shook my head. “Don’t say that.”

  “It’s true,” Mel said. “So if I’m good enough… you’re great enough.”

  I smiled. “You handle tonight, love. Okay? And then we’ll go from there.”

  “You’ll be there, right?” Mel asked.

  “I wouldn’t miss tonight for anything in the world,” I said. “I have a run with Mac and then I’m right back here.”

  “What does that mean? A run? You don’t run. Like… runners running…”

  “It’s just stuff,” I said. “Nothing to worry about. BC being BC.”

  “That’s what worries me,” Mel said.

  “Nothing should worry you, love,” I said. “Focus on tonight. You’re going to kill it.”

  “I know,” she said with a grin.

  “See? I knew it. You know how fucking awesome you are. You just like me giving you attention, don’t you?”

  “If I wanted your attention, Barr, I’d just do something else.”

  “Like what?”

  Mel’s cheeks turned red and she looked at the bed.

  “Ah,” I whispered. “Right. Well then, love, you’re lucky I don’t have to leave for a little while.”

  I pulled her close again and she laughed.

  We kissed for a few minutes and Mel broke the kiss.

  “Promise me,” she whispered.

  “What?”

  “Promise me you’ll be there. No matter what happens. I can’t do this without you, Barr. I know there’s so much happening here. And I believe everything you say. But I just-”

  I put my pointer finger to her lips. “Mel. I promise. No matter what’s going on around here, I will always take care of you. I promise. Got it? I fucking promise.”

  Mel blinked fast.

  I moved my finger away and she kissed me.

  The words echoed in my mind.

  I. Fucking. Promise.

  * * *

  Mac was late and I sat behind the wheel of the SUV with my hands gripped to it so tight my knuckles were bone white. I just stared ahead, trying to keep myself under control. All these deals that Mac insisted on taking part in weren’t smart. But they weren't stupid either. The reach of BC was well beyond Brooks Crest itself. Anything we wanted, we got.

  Someone pissed us off at HCH?

  We just took care of it. Or if need be, one phone call would take care of it. And then some.

  Taz opened the passenger door and nodded to me. “He’s coming out.”

  “Just him?” I asked.

  “No need for a crowd,” Taz said. “Plus, Mac has the others running a nest night.”

  “Without us there?” I asked.

  “Fuck it,” Taz said. “Mind if I smoke?”

  “Since when the fuck do I care about you smoking?”

  Taz laughed. “Shit. Good call. Good. Call.”

  I turned my head and saw Mac walking toward the SUV.

  His head down, taking the last, long drag of his cigarette.

  He lifted his head with a cloud of smoke around him as he flicked the cigarette away.

  A black bag over his shoulder, both of his hands clutching the strap tight.

  “I’ll be right back,” I said.

  “Barr,” Taz said.

  I got out of the SUV and side stepped to block Mac’s way.

  His eyes met mine.

  And even in the dark, it was there.

  The tension.

  The hate that had gotten between us.

  Shit… the hate that brought us together too.

  “Get out of the way, Barr,” Mac said.

  “What the fuck is this?” I asked. “We’re on another run. You have another bag. Are you going to swap it out for a bag of rocks again? Or what will it be this time? Toilet paper rolls? Unsharpened pencils? Huh?”

  “I’m doing what needs to be done,” Mac said.

  “We have this place under control,” I said. “And we have ourselves well known all around here.”

  “And you have your ticket out,” Mac said. “Your bags are packed, Barr. And I get it… you’re going to slide your hand around your girl’s waist and fly off into the night. But you remember when you had my girl dropped on her ass?”

  “Your girl… what are you talking about?”

  “If there was ever a problem with Chrissy, you should have let me handle it.”

  “Are you kidding me?” I asked with a laugh. “You and Pissy Chrissy were a real thing? Come on, brother.”

  Mac grabbed my shirt. “No. You know what you did.”

  “Nothing that wasn’t supposed to be done,” I said. I knocked his hand away. “You want to throw knives at my back for something that happened how long ago?”

  “Just do your thing and leave, Barr,” Mac said. “The rest of us see it. You did good here. You lived up to the name and reputation. But you know you’ve been slipping.”

  “Slipping…”

  “Just let me drive. Stay here. Let it go.”

  I ripped open the driver’s side door and got behind the wheel again.

  I took off before Mac could even close his door.

  He rattled off an address and directions when I needed them.

  We were well outside of BC when I made another famous turn into a parking lot that had a building that looked like something that would be haunted.

  Mac leaned forward and said, “Be my eyes. This should take
a minute.”

  Taz got out of the SUV along with Mac and when I got out, I just stood there.

  They both reached back and made sure they had weapons.

  I knew in my heart I should have known what was going on.

  I should have had a say and had action.

  All I cared about was getting back to BC.

  Getting to the auditorium and seeing Mel play piano.

  No matter what happened to me, as long as I could get to her.

  I lit a cigarette and laughed to myself.

  “It’s been longer than a minute, Mac,” I said.

  I blew smoke into the air and shook my head.

  I heard the sound of a foot scuffing against gravel and I quickly turned.

  Next thing I knew was darkness.

  * * *

  “… not to fucking kill him…”

  “He ain’t dead. Yet.”

  “Nah, brother. He’s just taking a siesta. That’s all. Dreaming of that pretty girl he runs with.”

  “Speaking of which…”

  I was stuck between here and there.

  I was alive.

  But I wasn’t awake.

  My eyes moved and my eyelids opened, but only for a second before closing again.

  I felt a hand slap my face.

  “Look at me, Barrington.”

  It was Mac’s voice.

  “Come on,” he said, slapping me again. “Open those fucking eyes, brother. I know you want to kill me. We can settle that at some point.”

  My eyelids fluttered again and slowly opened.

  Mac was hovering over me.

  “There you are,” he said. “Look. We’ve had a few problems here tonight. Not sure what happened to you…”

  I heard other voices laughing.

  “Here’s what we’re going to do,” Mac said. “I’ve got to take your wheels. I need to get somewhere. I can’t drag you along with me. With us. You know that though. We’ve been dragging you along for a while now.”

  He slapped my face again when my eyes started to shut.

  “What are we doing here, Mac?” Taz’s voice asked.

  “Let him do this,” Aric’s voice said.

  I lifted my head.

  BC was here.

  “Fuck,” I whispered.

  “Here’s how it works,” Mac said. “It’s all over. You’re going to leave. I’m going to be pissed that you left. We’re going to hate each other for the rest of our lives. Okay? It’s simple. If we cross paths though… I don’t know what’ll happen. Time will tell. I’m going to keep your girl too, Barr. Unless you want to fight for her. But if we do that, we’re fighting for life. Not fun. I know everything about you, Barr. All the dirty secrets you didn’t want us to know. You don’t belong here. You lit some shit on fire. You caused a little trouble. But your parents wanted you gone. That’s not BC. You’ll have time to think this through…”