Amanda Vs The Universe

by Patricia B Tighe

“Go fish.”

  She retrieved a card, and despite her recent illness, her knobby fingers remained steady. “There’s something I want to tell you.”

  “Okay. Got any fives?”

  “Go fish,” she said, then waited for me to meet her gaze. She adjusted her glasses. “I’m really proud of you.”

  Love for this wonderful woman practically burst from my chest. I smiled. “That’s sweet. Why?”

  “Because of all you’ve been through in recent months. You’ve learned from it, and you’ve grown. And you forgave Kyle.”

  Which he thanked me for in a text, but had said nothing else since. It had been four whole days. I shoved away my disappointment and narrowed my eyes. “Are you trying to distract me so you’ll win?”

  She let out one of her raspy chuckles and immediately went into a coughing fit.

  “Oh, Gamma. I’m so sorry.” I got her a tissue and then rubbed her back until the coughing stopped.

  She drank a few sips of water before trying to speak again. “I’ll be very glad when laughter no longer brings coughing.”

  “Me too. Can I get you anything else?”

  She swallowed more water. “No, let’s finish the game.”

  I sat and picked up my cards, not really seeing them. Gamma was feeling so much better that it always surprised me when she started coughing again. Even though it shouldn’t. She wiped her eyes with the tissue, folded it, and set it aside. I forced myself not to go hug her, because she’d gotten tired of the fuss we made over her. “Thank you for being proud of me,” I said quietly. “It means a lot.”

  “You’re welcome. Now, whose turn is it?”

  I slid the last card I drew—a queen of hearts—into place beside my other queen. “Yours, I think.”

  “Ah, very well then. Do you have any threes?”

  My mouth dropped open. “Gamma! Did you cheat?”

  She grinned, her light brown eyes twinkling. “No. I drew it a moment ago.”

  “Grrr.” I handed over my threes, and she added hers to them, putting all four of them on the table.

  “Thank you,” she said primly. “Now, do you have any queens?”

  “Agh! I don’t know why I even play with you,” I said, handing over the cards.

  “Because you love me.” She put the queens on the table. “Let’s see, do you—’’

  Tap, tap, tap came from the door. Gamma and I looked at each other. “Expecting someone?” I asked.

  “Just your father to eat with us at five-thirty.”

  I checked my phone. 5:05. Gamma was pushing herself up from her chair. “Hang on,” I said. “I’ll get the door. It’s probably not Dad. He’s never early.”

  She relaxed into her seat, though she swiveled toward the entryway. “Too true.”

  I opened the door and almost fell over.

  Twenty-Five

  Kyle stood there, a tentative smile on his face, holding a basket of colorful flowers.

  “Kyle?” I clutched the edge of the door. Heat rushed into my face, and my fingers pressed against my throat.

  “Hi,” he said, not moving. He just stared, his gaze going from my hair to my eyes and lips and back again.

  As hot as my skin felt, my face had to be bright red. “What’re you doing here?”

  Gamma’s voice came from behind me. “Invite him in, dear.” Oh, right. I’d forgotten she could see the apartment door from the table. Her place just wasn’t that big.

  I stepped back. “Of course. Sorry. Um, come in.”

  Kyle walked straight over to Gamma, who had stood up while I was busy being shocked. “Hello,” he said. “You must be Mrs. Bryson.” He shifted the basket into one arm and gently shook the hand she held out to him.

  “Yes,” she said with a smile. “I’m Delphine Amanda Bryson, but you can call me Gamma like everyone else.”

  “I’m Kyle Matthew Young. It’s really nice to meet you.”

  “You too.” She grinned over at me and sat down. “Amanda, you can close the door now. And your mouth.”

  Kyle smirked, meeting my gaze with his warm one.

  I shut the door with shaky hands. Kyle was here. In Gamma’s apartment, looking like he totally belonged. They were making small talk while I stood there trying to move my feet to walk over to them.

  “These are for you,” he said to Gamma, indicating the flowers. “Where would you like me to put them?”

  “How lovely!” she said. “Over on the coffee table, for now. Come look, Amanda. Kyle brought me flowers.”

  “They’re beautiful,” I murmured, walking dreamlike to the table. I sank into my seat. I couldn’t talk any louder, because a sob sat in my throat, blocking my vocal cords. He brought flowers for my great-grandmother. For Gamma, whom he barely knew. My heart gave a kick like it was restarting after being dead for two weeks.

  “What’s the occasion?” Gamma asked.

  “Just glad that you’re feeling better,” he said.

  Kyle turned to us after putting the flowers down. Another brick of emotion hit my chest and leaped into my throat. He wore jeans and a black T-shirt with a stylized bright yellow sun on it. The exact same sun as the one the tagger had painted on the outside of Cady’s studio wall. The sun I made a joke about putting on a T-shirt and wearing every day.

  “Please sit,” Gamma said, and Kyle chose a chair next to her. “Such lovely delphiniums in that arrangement. My first name comes from delphinium.” She gave him a shrewd look. “But you knew that, didn’t you?”

  “Yes, ma’am.” Pink flushed his cheeks. That was a first. I’d never seen him blush before.

  She nodded slowly at him. “You are very wise, young man.”

  “I’m trying,” he said, giving me a quick look.

  How? How had he known Gamma’s name, much less picked out flowers based on it? Someone in my family was a huge snitch. Part of me wanted to drag him up from his chair and kiss him. But another part wanted to walk out the door and run away. We had so much to talk over though. If he thought he could just come in here and woo Gamma to get on my good side, then … yeah, okay. I couldn’t lie to myself. It had totally worked.

  They sat there talking like old friends, Gamma telling him how she was about to beat me, yet again, in our Go Fish battle. She offered him something to drink, and in a daze, I got him a glass of iced tea. That was what he’d asked for, right?

  After a few more minutes of friendly conversation, Gamma gave me a long look. “I believe I’ll give you and Kyle a few minutes to catch up with each other. Please excuse me.” Kyle helped her up, but she waved him off when he tried to walk her to her room. “I’ll be back soon,” she said. The bedroom door closed quietly behind her.

  Kyle sat back down and studied me with his warm gaze, the one I could get lost in. My heart thumped so loudly he must’ve been able to hear it. I grabbed the seat of my chair, then let go. Rubbed my hands on my legs, then stopped. I got up, poured my own glass of iced tea, and leaned against the kitchen counter, which was only five feet away from where he sat. I had no idea how to start this conversation. Why are you here? Couldn’t you have texted first?

  He cleared his throat. “So did I tell you the tagger kid came to talk to Cady?”

  Good, a neutral subject. Smart boy. “No. When was this?”

  “During the festival. She hadn’t planned to go, but on Tuesday, I think it was, decided she really wanted to sit at Matilda’s booth for a while. So we went. That afternoon the kid showed up. His name is Carter Lipton, and he’s thirteen. They had an exciting conversation while I sat there shooting daggers at him.”

  That brought a smile out of me. I could just picture it. “I assume he ignored you.”

  Kyle took a swallow of his tea. “They both did. Anyway, Cady commissioned him to repaint the studio wall, saying he could continue with that sun motif thing or do something else. As long as he would quit with the graffiti. The dude was freakishly happy. Then she got Matilda involved, who said she was willing to give him painting lessons
if he wanted.”

  “Huh. What about the other taggers?”

  “They were arrested. Their lawyers are asking for them to do community service instead of jail time. Carter might have to do it too. But Cady is planning to speak on his behalf, or however they say that.” Kyle adjusted the bracelets on his wrist. The red woven one was missing. The reminder that girls just wanted to use him. “Carter’s not a total jerk, though.”

  “Really?” I said, letting snark creep into my voice. “Why do you say that?”

  Kyle fought a smile. “Because he gave me permission to use his design.” He pulled at his T-shirt.

  “Nice.” I set my glass on the counter and folded my arms. “That was my idea though.”

  “I remember.” He bent and picked up a small gift bag I hadn’t noticed in all the surprise of him showing up. “This is for you.” His voice squeaked a little and he cleared his throat.

  Man, just when I was getting comfortable with the whole friend vibe, he had to do something personal. I took in a shaky breath. “You didn’t have to get me something.” I sat down and, without looking at him, slid the item wrapped in crepe paper out of the bag. I pulled it open to see a medium-blue heathered tee with the sun design on it. A happy warmth spread through me, and I smiled. “It’s perfect. Thank you.”

  “I’m glad you like it.”

  “I do.” I narrowed my eyes at him. “So who in my family gave you the info on Gamma?”

  “Your parents. Well, your mom mostly. Your dad did say that if I hurt you he was going to string me up by my toes. I think he wanted to choose a different body part, but your mother interrupted him.”

  “He prides himself on his threats.”

  “I can see why.” His hand ran across his bracelets.

  “You’re missing one of those,” I said, pointing at them.

  He slid the collection of bracelets to the base of his wrist before letting go. “Yeah. The one that was supposed to remind me not to trust girls. I don’t need it anymore. Not with you.”

  What could I say to that? Glad you trust me now? My breaths came shallowly as I stared at the bright yellow sun on the tee. Kyle’s caring expression was too hard to take.

  “Amanda,” he whispered.

  When I met his eyes, he leaned toward me. “Please give me another chance. I was an idiot not to trust you. I know I don’t deserve—”

  “Don’t. I already forgave you,” I said, smoothing the T-shirt’s soft fabric against the table. “Let’s not talk about the past, okay?”

  “Okay,” he said, a wary look in his eyes.

  “I mean, we do need to talk,” I said, trying to keep my voice steady. I swallowed and cleared my throat, stalling so I could find my courage. “Here’s the thing. I want to be with you.”

  Our gazes met. “I sense a but in there,” he said.

  I gave him a slow nod. “But I’m afraid to trust you. It still hurts when I remember the blow-up two weeks ago.”

  “It hurts me too. But that’s mostly guilt and being afraid I’ll never get you back.”

  Okay, Amanda, time to see if we had a future. Was I ready to lay it all out there? Well, too late now. I folded the T-shirt as I spoke. “Right, well, I’ve been thinking about how we might make this work.”

  “Really?”

  If I had to keep looking at his intense gaze, I’d never finish what I wanted to say. I went to the window and partially closed the blinds. “I’ve come up with a few rules.”

  He stood. “Rules?”

  “Well, they’re not really rules, more like guidelines for us to have a good relationship.”

  I straightened one of the little robin statues Gamma had on her bookshelf. The silly cleaning people kept moving things around. Ugh. Focus, Amanda.

  Kyle watched me with something like anticipation. “And?”

  “Okay, so first. Alex, or A.J., or whatever you want to call him, has absolutely nothing to do with our relationship. He’s not in my life anymore. I’ve blocked his number and deleted all the photos of him from my phone. ”

  “You did?”

  I tilted my head up. “I did. I know you still have to see him because of family stuff, and that might make me have to see him too, but he has nothing to do with you and me. We have to agree to trust each other.”

  “I’m down with that.”

  I pressed my fingertips against my head. “What else, what else?” I let go. “Right, if we ever get in a fight, we have to talk things over. Maybe not right that minute, if you just can’t, but you have to agree to talk.”

  He stepped closer. “I do agree. I’ll be the talkiest guy ever. In fact, I’m sure I’ll win at the talking competition. You won’t know what hit you.”

  I exhaled a laugh, then said something I shouldn’t have. “That’s okay, I know how to make you stop talking.”

  “Do you?” He grinned.

  Oh, crap. Truly a bad idea. Kyle closed the distance between us with a definite swoony look on his face. I raised a hand, stopping him four inches away. “If you touch me, I won’t be able to finish this.”

  He treated me to a slow smile. “Go ahead, then.”

  “Um, okay, where was I?”

  “You have some secret knowledge on how to get me to stop talking.” His gaze roamed over my face and down my neck.

  I shivered as though he were actually touching me. “I want to see you more than once a week. I know it’s hard since we go to different schools, but I want more than just daily text messages.”

  “Agreed. Are you gonna write all this down so I won’t forget?”

  I gave him a “what the heck” look. “Do I need to?”

  He slid his hands into his jeans pockets. “How else am I gonna make sure I don’t screw anything up?”

  He looked so freaking cute that I dug my heels into the carpet so I wouldn’t fling myself at him. “Okay, I’ll write them down,” I said. “Next, if one of us is on a winning streak in any of our competitions, he or she has to let the other person win.”

  “Now wait a second,” he said, shaking his head. “That’s going too far.”

  I struggled to keep a straight face. “Why?”

  “Because it’s not a real competition if someone has to take a fall.”

  “When have our competitions ever been real?”

  “This one is,” he said and slid a length of my hair behind my ear. “The minute you gave me another chance, I won.”

  “Wrong,” I said. “The second you walked in the door, I won.”

  He bent his head until only a whisper separated our lips. “Guess we have to call it a draw, then.”

  “Guess so.” He lingered before me, his breath mingling with mine, my pulse getting faster with each second. Warmth radiated from his body, drawing me in, making me want to fold myself in his arms. But he still didn’t move. “Kyle?”

  “Yeah?” he whispered.

  “Is this a competition to see who can last the longest without kissing?”

  He lifted his head and laughed, his eyes crinkling. “No, but let’s do that sometime. I’m just waiting for your next rule.”

  “Guideline.”

  “Right. Plus you told me not to touch—”

  I kissed him. Went up on my toes, flung my arms around him, and kissed him. After he got over the first moment of surprise, he cradled my head and kissed me back—a long, slow, toe-curling kiss. I didn’t expect any less, but there was something else going on. It felt like a kiss of second chances, of hope for the future, of fun competitions.

  He lifted his head finally, gave me a loopy smile, and then kissed me again. Just when it started to heat up like the last one, Kyle froze. “What’s that noise?” he said against my lips before pulling back.

  I kissed his neck, smiled when he inhaled sharply, and ran my hands along the muscles of his back. “What noise?” I murmured.

  “Listen.”

  I raised my head. Beep, beep, beep. “Sounds like the oven timer.”

  He stepped away. “Is
something in the—”

  “The oven timer!” I strode to the tiny kitchen just as Gamma came out of her bedroom.

  “Is the casserole ready?” she asked, examining both of us in turn.

  I swallowed back my embarrassment. We both had to have flushed faces and messy hair. “Let’s check,” I said, and grabbed the oven mitts. I brought out the bubbly, cheesy chicken-and-rice mess that my mother liked to call “The Gamma Special.” The aroma swept over me, and my stomach growled.

  “Really, Amanda,” Gamma said with a grin. “Control yourself.”

  “I can’t. That smells better than bacon.”

  “Seriously?” Kyle said.

  I swung toward him. “Don’t you think?”

  “You will stay for dinner, won’t you, Kyle?” she asked.

  “Of course,” he said. “I’d love it.”

  The doorbell rang. “Well, would you look at that,” Gamma said. “Your father is on time.” She opened the door to my dad. “Mike, dear, you shouldn’t be punctual. People will think you’re becoming unpredictable.”

  Dad kissed her cheek. “You’re right, Gamma. It’ll never happen again.” He looked at Kyle and me, his shoulders relaxing when he saw my smile. After a few minutes of small talk while my father helped Gamma put food on the table, I eased back to stand next to Kyle.

  He wove his fingers through mine. “Your grandmother is really great,” he whispered.

  “Great-grandmother.”

  He looked insulted. “I can’t say your great-grandmother is really great. It’s redundant.”

  I laughed. I mean, what else could I do? “You’re very silly.”

  He smiled, eyes gleaming as he studied me. “We’re gonna have so much fun.”

  “Are we?”

  “Yup. Because it’s time for a new competition.”

  “What now?” I asked, trying to look serious.

  He tilted his head toward Gamma and my father, who were happily bickering over whether we needed spoons on the table. “She probably already loves me more than you. I brought flowers.”

  I let out a fake gasp. “You wouldn’t dare try to steal Gamma,” I whispered.

  “Wouldn’t I?” He stroked the hair resting on my back, and I shivered. Then he strolled to the table. “Please sit, Gamma. I can do that for you.” He took the napkins from her while my dad raised his eyebrows.