Play For Me

by Tam DeRudder Jackson

  “You enjoy your afternoon?” I asked as I tossed my snapback onto the desk by the front door.

  “Um, mostly.”

  Her voice and her body language were off. And she’d changed her clothes since I left. Something was up.

  I stepped right into her space, interrupting her cleaning. “What happened? Is Angel okay?”

  Clio puffed out a breath. “Angel’s great. She’s sleeping off a rather big meal at the moment.” She barely glanced at me. “Apparently, she enjoys a White Claw every once in a while, just like her mom.” Her lame smile made her attempt at humor less than convincing.

  “What happened?” I steadied her with my hands on her shoulders. “You and your friends have a fight or something? You mad at Annabelle for giving me your number?”

  “She shouldn’t have done that, but it didn’t matter in the end, did it?”

  “It did. That night after we played Red Rocks was the best night of my life, Clio.” Lifting my hand, I toyed with a stray strand of her fiery hair. “I’d wanted to reconnect with you for a long time, and when I finally did, you totally rocked my world.” I ducked my head to capture her eyes. “Then you disappeared from it. That’s not what I wanted at all.”

  “We didn’t talk much that night, so when I heard that message on your phone, I thought, well”—she looked away from me—“I thought I’d interrupted your real life. I didn’t want to stick around and be in the way.”

  I pulled her into my arms and held her close to my chest. “You’re my real life, Clio.” I rested my chin on the top of her head. “You and now Angel.” Pulling back a bit, I recaptured her eyes with mine. “Promise me you won’t close me out again.”

  She slid her troubled gaze to my chest and nodded. “Okay.”

  That was too easy. It made me uncomfortable. “Okay? Just like that? After you spent nearly all of the last year avoiding me, keeping me from you and the family we’ve started?” I ducked my head again to see into her eyes. “What happened this afternoon?”

  She squeezed her eyes shut and tightened her arms around me.

  “That bad? What is it Clio? You’re scaring me.”

  “Harrison sent his lawyer over here this afternoon.”

  I tightened my arms around my girl. “What the fuck?”

  “Not long after you left. He arrived with papers for me to sign Angel over to Harrison and Meredith.”

  My entire body stiffened. “He did what?”

  “Whatever Clive Carlyle told them about me after I sent him away with my fuck-off message was evidence enough for them to determine me an unfit mother to a child they wanted to make go away in the first place.”

  With her face buried so deep in my chest, she had to feel my heart kick into overdrive at her words. “You didn’t sign those papers, though, right?”

  “Of course not.” She sniffed into my T-shirt. “But I’ll have to take out another loan for a lawyer to fight them. At least until they discover I have a daughter.”

  “What are you talking about? A loan? Where did you miss the fact that I’m loaded? Plus, the band has a stable of lawyers on retainer. We aren’t giving our daughter to anyone, Clio.”

  As tightly as she held me, I wouldn’t have thought she could snuggle in any closer, but at my words, she tried to burrow herself into me. Though I didn’t appreciate the circumstances, even a little bit, I’d be lying if I didn’t admit to enjoying the consequences. Aside from that one glorious night when she’d let me inside her, I’d never been so close to her, physically or emotionally. I could have stood there with her like that all day in her saucepan of a kitchen.

  Something else she’d said intruded on the moment, and I pulled away enough to look down into troubled gray eyes. “You haven’t told them anything? They don’t even know the sex of their only grandchild?”

  “Why would I tell them anything? Why would I even think they’d want to know?” She pushed away from me and wandered over to the couch. “You weren’t there the day I told them I was pregnant, Jack.” She sat down, dropping her face into her hands. “You didn’t see the expressions of utter horror on their faces, hear the disappointment morph into disgust and disdain in their voices as they kicked me out of their lives,” she whispered.

  The hitch in her voice tore at my gut. As hard as she tried to remain indifferent to her parents’ cruelty, she couldn’t deny how they’d hurt her. She never admitted it in words, but her voice, her eyes gave her away whenever the subject of her parents came up. If they’d been present in the room with us, I doubt I could have restrained myself from taking swings at both of them.

  Joining her on the couch, I pulled her into my side and ran my hand over the silk of her hair, soothing her and myself. “You think they’ll reject Angel once they find out she’s a girl?”

  “I know they will.”

  “Because of how they treated you.” It wasn’t a question.

  “That and because the lawyer who showed up today kept referring to the infant as he. Once Harrison and Meredith know I have a daughter, they’ll reject her and—”

  Her voice caught, and she didn’t finish the thought. She didn’t need to. Clio held back the information her parents demanded because she couldn’t face being rejected—again—herself. I squeezed her tighter to me. It was either that or punch a hole in the wall.

  “Babe, you and Angel are the best parts of my life. I admit, discovering I was a father threw me at first.” She stiffened in my arms, and I hurried on. “But now, I can’t imagine my life without Angel in it. I already know what my life is like without you in it, and I don’t want to go back there.” I kissed the side of her head. “We’ll fight your parents.”

  “Harrison and Meredith,” she corrected me.

  I nodded. “We’ll fight Harrison and Meredith, and when we’re done, they’ll be sorry they ever worried you or made you think for one second that you aren’t up to parenting our baby. You’re an amazing mom, and our little girl is lucky you’re hers.”

  I felt her smile against my shirt and pulled away enough to see it.

  “You do know I come from a family of six sons, right?”

  Clio blinked. “I forgot about that.”

  “Yeah, after she had my older brother, my mom wanted a daughter. If I’d been a girl, I think they might’ve even stopped having kids. Instead, I was a boy, and then they had four more boys. A basketball team plus a sixth man,” I said with a laugh as I remembered the standing family joke whenever we had a holiday dinner with the grandparents. “When Mom had my youngest brother, she finally gave in. She told my dad she’d have daughters eventually. Six of them. She hoped he could live with that.” I laughed at the memory. “When my parents meet you and Angel, Mom is going to be over the moon.”

  “You’re going to introduce me to your family?” she asked, wide-eyed.

  “What the fuck, Clio? Hell yes, I’m introducing you to my family. You’re not my dirty little secret.”

  Jesus, what had her parents said to her when they’d tossed her from their lives? Not only did they not want her, but no one else would either? Harrison Barnes had a lot to answer for whenever I had the misfortune of seeing that bastard again. He didn’t want me to have her, but she wasn’t good enough for his family either. What kind of sick situation was that?

  We sat in silence for a few minutes. Clio’s stomach growled, and I had to laugh. “You spent the afternoon drinking and not eating, I take it.”

  “After that nasty lawyer left, Annabelle decided we needed to buzz him out of our heads. Food might have impeded the plan.”

  I laughed. “She’s a piece of work, that Annabelle.”

  “If it hadn’t been for her, I don’t know if I could have stopped that lawyer from barging right into my place. Annabelle stood up for me. Aaaand she also told the guy to fuck off. More than once.” Worry clouded her face. “So now Harrison and Meredith will probably add another black mark that my friends are a bad influence on the infant, another indication of my inability to parent hi
m properly.” She sighed.

  “Like I said, babe, I have access to some of the best lawyers in the country. In fact, I’m going to give one of them a call right now, make this go away before it even begins.” I reluctantly set Clio away from me so I could fish my phone from my pocket.

  “Won’t involving your lawyers mean the press will find out about us, about Angel?”

  I shrugged. “It could happen.” Outside her front window, a flock of bluebirds landed in the treetop beyond her tiny deck. “Our guys will do their best to keep everything discreet, but like I said before, I’m not ashamed of either of you. If the press finds out, the press finds out.”

  Crossing her arms over her chest, she leaned back into the too-soft cushions of her couch. “Easy for you to say. You’re used to the celebrity. Maybe you even like it. But that’s not me.” She stood and went back to the kitchen to finish cleaning up. “I’m perfectly happy to remain out of the spotlight, and I don’t want to have to worry about Angel every second I can’t be with her when I’m finishing up my classes.” Her stance as she leaned against her tiny island, like she was prepared for battle, made her meaning even more clear than her words did.

  “Babe, I’ll keep us as quiet as I can, but I play in the hottest rock band in the country, so word is going to get out. We were going to need to make plans for that before Harrison sicced his people on you.” I stood and walked around the island. “When I talk to my lawyer, though, I’ll ask for some advice on restraining orders and how we can keep the press away from you and especially away from Angel. Okay?”

  I tilted her chin up with my knuckle. Because I couldn’t help myself, I slipped my fingers along her jaw and cupped her face in my hand. When I leaned in and kissed her, I meant for it to be a light brush, a little reassurance. Yeah, right. The second our lips touched, I had to have more.

  Tugging her close, I increased the pressure, and she sighed into my mouth, opening for me like a flower. Hers was an invitation I could never refuse. When I slid my tongue into her mouth, my body caught fire. Before I could even think, I had her back in my arms, her sweet ass backed up against the counter, my thighs pressing into hers.

  The whimpering sound she made in the back of her throat as I deepened the kiss drove me wild and made my cock pound against the fly of my jeans. My response to her should have been no surprise, but the need to make love to her finally overpowered me. I tore my mouth away from hers and panted. “If you aren’t ready for me yet, I need to know right now. ’Cause Clio, baby, I’m about to explode. I want you that much.”

  She smiled at me. “I’m so glad I’m not in this alone, Jack.”

  I spun her around toward the bedroom so fast we both almost lost our balance. She laughed a breathy little sound, but I was too focused on my goal to appreciate the humor of the situation.

  As I righted us and backed her toward the bedroom, I asked, “How quiet do we have to be?” and flinched at how the hoarseness of my voice made me sound as desperate as I felt. In all my life, I couldn’t remember wanting anything as badly as I wanted inside Clio Barnes in that moment.

  “I don’t know. Angel sleeps through everything else, so hopefully the two of us making love won’t wake her. There’s only one way to find out though.” The look on her face and the tone of her voice dared me to finish what I’d started.

  Oh, hell yeah. I took that dare.

  Before she had a chance to think, I had her sprawled out on her bed, my hands busy palming her tits through her thin camisole and bra. She rewarded me with hard nipples and moans of pleasure as I kneaded and plucked her beautiful full breasts. Nursing Angel had definitely made her bigger in the chest, a circumstance I wholeheartedly approved. Not that I thought she’d lacked there, but the additional volume was a bonus.

  Kissing the column of her neck, I tasted her sweetness, savored her pulse racing beneath my lips. Her breathy moans echoed through me, firing me up. Her neck was so sensitive, something I remembered from when we first dated, something that hadn’t changed.

  Her responses to my touch had my cock straining painfully to escape the fly of my jeans. When she arched up into my hands and my mouth, I groaned against her skin. She captured my lips with hers while she reached for me, unbuttoning my fly and easing the pressure there. Then she slipped her hand down my boxers and palmed my length, and I surged into her grasp.

  “Jesus, Clio. I’m already on fire for you, and then you go and do that.”

  Sliding my hand under her top, I smoothed my way along the silky skin of her belly, dragging her camisole up. When I reached her bra, I slipped my fingers beneath it too until she picked up the hint and lifted her shoulders off the bed so I could finish undressing her upper body.

  Staring down at her full ripe breasts, I smiled. “I’ve never seen anything in my entire life prettier than your tits. I want my mouth on you right now.” Out of the corner of my eye, I caught the edge of the bassinet and remembered Angel. “Can I do that? Can I lick and kiss your gorgeous breasts?”

  She smiled up at me and arched her back, giving me an even more impressive view. “I want your mouth on me so much. But be prepared for a little something extra.”

  Bending to her nipple, I kissed and licked her until I couldn’t stand it and had to suck her completely into my mouth. I sucked hard, and Clio cried out and shoved her hands in my hair, holding me to her. The little drops of her milk I pulled from her tasted sweet and sort of rich. Nothing like what I expected. She rubbed her hips against me, and I couldn’t think about anything other than getting us both out of our pants.

  I rolled away from her, sat on the edge of the bed, and pulled my T-shirt over my head, flinging it to the floor as I simultaneously shucked my Converse. My jeans and boxers followed fast. Snagging a condom from my wallet, I lay back on the bed and discovered Clio naked beside me.

  Focusing on arousing her completely, I stroked her from her shoulder, across her nipple—still wet from my mouth—and down her smooth belly to the apex of her thighs. The tangle of curls there pulled my fingers down farther, and I slipped them over her swollen clit, rubbing the pad of my finger over her.

  Clio moaned and opened her legs for me, giving me the access I silently insisted on. When I slipped a finger into her folds, I pleasured her hot, wet channel and gazed into her eyes, smiling at her. I used my teeth to tear open the condom packet one-handed, smoothed the condom over my dick and rolled over, inserting my body between her legs while bracing myself over her with my forearms on either side of her head.

  “This first time we need to go slow, Jack,” she whispered as she dragged her hands over the skin of my chest and down the length of my torso until she grasped my cock. Lifting her hips to me, she guided me to her entrance, her words and actions so at odds I didn’t know what to do.

  But my body did. I lowered myself into her, her wetness making it easy for me, the tightness of her pussy reminding me she hadn’t done this in a long time. Gritting my teeth, I sank into her as slowly as I could, but, sweet Jesus, she felt so perfect. It was all I could do to stop from pounding into her from the first thrust.

  “Oh, Jack,” she said on a sigh as she ran her hands up and down the length of my back. And that was it.

  All the months of being without her, all the weeks of being with her and not having her came together in that sigh. Her response gave me a bigger rush than playing any stadium show in front of thousands of screaming fans. Everything I ever wanted lay in this bed with me, and I couldn’t have stopped myself from claiming her if a firing squad encircled us.

  “Clio!” I shouted as I pounded into her, all good intentions of taking it slow forgotten as she wrapped her arms and legs around me and tightened her pussy, pulling me so deep inside her I didn’t know where I ended and she began.

  The pressure inside me built and built as I gave and gave and gave her everything I had to give. She arched against me and screamed my name. The orgasm gathering at the base of my spine exploded, and I thrust hard into her again and again, j
oining her as I blasted us into space.

  Afterward, my arms gave way, and I fell onto her chest. She tightened her arms around me and sighed into my skin in the curve where my shoulder met my neck. It wasn’t until I came back down that I noticed the rough soreness in my throat, so I knew I’d been shouting. It was all I could do to pick up my head and look over at the baby’s bassinet to see if I’d awakened her. Mercifully, my perfectly named little angel had slept through her parents’ rather loud reconnection.

  Dropping my head back down to the pillow, I groaned. “Babe, you are going to be the death of me, but I’m going to die a very happy man.”

  “Jack, I’m so glad you’re persistent.”

  “You have no idea how persistent I can be, Clio.”

  “I hope you’re going to show me. In fact, I’m counting on it,” she said, her smile warm on my skin.

  At last, I found the strength to roll off her, but not wanting to end our connection, I pulled her half over me. She snuggled contentedly on my chest, her hand tracing lightly over my pecs and abs. After a few minutes, she pushed up onto her elbow to check out my ink.

  “What’s this?” she asked as she traced the stylized C I’d had inked over my left pec after I’d attended her high school graduation.

  “What does it look like?” I teased.

  “Is . . . is that for me?” she asked, wonder in her tone.

  “Yeah, babe, it is,” I answered truthfully and held my breath.

  “How long have you had it?”

  “Four years.”

  Her eyes flew to mine. “But we weren’t even talking to each other then. I was about a minute out of high school.”

  “Even though I was touring and trying to make it as a musician, you were never far from my thoughts”—I glanced down where her finger traced over my skin—“or my heart.”

  Her smile lit me up like the sun. I should have told her everything then, but we were so happy, so connected in the postcoital afterglow, that I didn’t want to ruin things. No doubt her dad was a first-class asshole, but I hadn’t been entirely innocent in the deal either.