Resentments and Revenge

by Diane Ezzard

  “No, I’ll let him know we’re eating now. He said he’d be here, and he’s not,” I said, feeling vexed. I sent another text, this time with no kisses on the end.

  It was another thirty minutes before Jack arrived. I’d virtually given up on him and thought he would be a no-show. He apologised and tried to explain what happened. On a better day, I might have listened to his excuses but right now I was too upset. I didn’t like how he became the centre of attention as he recounted the story of his recent fight. Today, he’d been with Jade, trying to talk her out of going off with Dom. Any sympathy for his cause didn’t come from me.

  “I feel sorry for the young girl. She’ll end up getting involved with the gang again. There’s a certain attraction with bad boys.” Angela said. She looked across at Nick. He couldn’t be more of a good boy if he tried. He was Angela’s lapdog and yes man all rolled into one. She took hold of his hand and patted it. “I still prefer my Nick, though.” She smiled at him.

  I wanted to puke. I wasn’t one for gushing romance, especially not when expressed in public. Nick held up Angela’s palm and kissed it, gazing back at her.

  “Oh, get a room, you two,” I said, imitating vomiting noises whilst sticking my finger down my throat. We laughed. Angela continued to sing Nick’s praises telling us how he had just put a shed up and decorated the back room. I was envious. I had was a man who worked long hours and couldn’t even turn up on time.

  What made it worse was that now every time he was late, I thought he’d gone rushing back to Caroline. I couldn’t stop thinking about the pair of them together. I didn’t want to be the jealous type, but I couldn’t help it. I wished he hadn’t told me he went to her house. I’d have preferred the bliss of ignorance. Now, all I pictured was the two of them in bed together. I was dying to say something to him, but it was best to bide my time and wait until Angela and Nick left.

  I was quieter than normal, and the others noticed. Jack kept looking over at me and I reacted by sending him a pained expression and turning away. I couldn’t muster a smile, even when cringey jokes were told. I knew I was being a moody hostess. It was a good job we were old friends.

  The food went down well. Nick and Angela stayed for two more hours. At the end of the evening, we stood at the door, hugging and kissing, agreeing to do it again sometime soon. I waved them off and as soon as they left, I closed the door and turned to Jack.

  With my hands on my hips, I cried, “How could you?”

  “I’m sorry.” He moved in closer to comfort me, but I walked away.

  “Leave me alone,” I said with a strangled tone. I went into the kitchen to fill the dishwasher. He followed me in.

  “Here, let me do that.” I let him. It would take more than a few dishes to win me over, though. I would make him suffer for this.

  “Okay,” I said, using the same sort of tone I did whenever I phoned in work sick. I retired to sit in the lounge. He would probably clear everything away. I was right. Ten minutes later he walked in with a mug of tea.

  “Here, I made you this.” I took it from him.

  “Thanks.” There was tension in the air. The thoughts of him and Caroline together smouldered inside me. I knew the fire was ready to erupt any second. I tapped my fingers on the side of the chair.

  “So, were you late because you were shagging Caroline?” Heat poured out of my cheeks.

  “No, Of course not!” he frowned. I scowled. “I told you where I was. Look, I apologise for involving her. I made a mistake. I hold my hands up, but I am not interested in Caroline, honestly, Sophie. You’ve got to learn to trust me.” He looked a forlorn sight. His injuries were healing but his face had now taken on a mustard-coloured tinge. I felt sorry for him.

  I wanted to believe him, but I wasn’t sure I could.

  Chapter 17

  Jack

  It took a while to climb out of the doghouse. Trial and error showed me I had to wait for Sophie to simmer down. If I spoke too soon, anything I said made it worse. If I bided my time and played it cool concentrating on work, eventually she softened. It was difficult with her sometimes when I couldn’t put a finger right. We were now back on track.

  Snakehips had avoided me since my nasty encounter with the bruisers. The more I tried to get hold of him, the more infuriated I became because he wasn’t returning my calls. I would catch up with him and Rocking Rod at some point in the future and I wouldn’t like to be in their shoes when I found them.

  I arranged to go and see Marcus, the boy I stumbled upon in the house in Chadderton. It would be a supervised visit as he was still a minor. I would have preferred to speak to him alone, but that wasn’t possible. Going in tough would have worked better to get information out of him but I would have the beady eyes of his temporary foster mother, Sasha on me. He was not allowed to return home. His own mother was an addict. In light of what happened, four of her children had now also been removed. The eldest one, Toby absconded a few months back.

  Sasha didn’t look much older than me, in her mid-thirties. I was surprised at someone so young wanting to foster children but maybe she couldn’t have kids herself. She had long bushy dark hair, the top part was held off her face with a clip at the back. She wore an oversized grey sweatshirt and leggings.

  “Hi, Jack,” she smiled as we shook hands. “Are you sitting down Marcus?” His dark curly hair flopped forward. He shot a glance at me then looked away.

  “How are you doing, Marcus?” I asked. He grunted and angled his body away from me.

  “I want a chat about the other day.” I got out the picture of Louie to show him. “Do you know this boy?” He shook his head. “Have you ever seen him before?” His lips thinned, and the corners of his mouth drooped. He continued to shake his head. “Have either of the Duggan’s ever mentioned the name, Louie?” He looked at me as though I had asked him to strip naked.

  “I take it, that’s a no, then.” He didn’t reply.

  “Come on, Marcus, answer the question,” Sasha said in a sickly-sweet voice and patted his knee. He squirmed in the seat. He didn’t speak. I looked at Marcus then at Sasha. I weighed up how hard I could press him without the interview being stopped. I decided to try something else. I whispered in his ear.

  “I was wondering if you could get me a bag of brown.” My expression was serious. He smirked. “Seriously, it’s for me, only my dealer’s been caught and he’s now doing a fifteen-year stretch.” I watched Marcus closely. He frowned. He wasn’t sure whether to believe me.

  “See, he told me what it’s like inside. He’s not the main man anymore. He doesn’t call all the shots. If he doesn’t toe the line, they beat him up. They’ve carved his face up, said he looked too pretty.” I put my face up to Marcus’s so close I could feel the breath through his nostrils. “Can you imagine a good-looking lad like you having his face cut up?” He stared at Sasha. She frowned at me. I didn’t stop there. “That’s not all, he’s been gang-raped by some big black dudes. Made quite a mess of him, by all accounts. Is that the life you want for yourself, Marcus? Is that what your future will be? How old are you now, Marcus?”

  “Thirteen,” he replied. He squirmed, looking uncomfortable. Something was working.

  “By the time you get out of prison, you’ll be an old man with no life left to live.” Inwardly I laughed at the idea of being old at thirty, but I suspected a thirteen-year-old would think it old.

  “Who was it got to you, was it Dom or Dirk?” I asked. There was silence for a few seconds. I waited.

  “Dom,” he replied. I tapped my feet on the floor. Maybe we would get somewhere after all.

  “Where did you meet him, Marcus?” He stared at Sasha, then turned to me.

  “He was outside the school gates one day and showed me a £200 pair of trainers and asked me if I liked them. I told him of course I did but I couldn’t afford them. He said they were mine, and he just gave them to me and that was it. The next day he came back and this time he gave me a cool looking watch. It baffled me why
he was doing it. I took it though. I didn’t see him for a few days but the next time he was there, he had a mobile phone that he handed me. I tried to refuse because I was suspicious by now, but he insisted I took it home and kept it quiet, so I did.”

  “What happened next?” He looked at me then glanced at Sasha.

  “I was sent a text message asking to meet me, so I went along. There was another guy there, and he gave me a wad of money. He asked if I wanted a ride in his BMW. It was neat, man. I got in. It was just the three of us, listening to rap music. I was taken back to this house. There were a few other kids there. We listened to music, watched a few videos and smoked draw.”

  “And they didn’t ask you to do anything for them?” Marcus kept looking over at Sasha.

  “Not at first. We watched the same videos over and over. They got me into grime music, then one day they asked me if I’d be in one of their videos. I didn’t understand what they meant. They said I’d be famous and make loads of money.”

  “What was in these videos, Marcus?”

  “It was drill music and there was a lot of violence, you know with guns and threatening kids, that kind of thing. At first, I refused to do it, but the tall guy, Joey stabbed me in the hand.” He held his hand up to show me the scar. I nodded. Marcus had already opened up more than I expected.

  “I got some great stuff, you know, Converse jeans, Paul and Shark t-shirts, Nike trainers. You name it, I had all the latest designer gear,” he said, thrusting out his chest.

  “So, what happened after they gave you all those clothes and stuff?”

  “Some of it was fun, you know, hanging out with the older guys. I thought it wasn’t a bad life, all that money around me. Then it turned nasty and they threatened to harm my family if I stood up to them or said I wouldn’t do what they asked.”

  “You lived with your mum and brothers and sisters before you left, didn’t you?”

  “Yeah, and I was worried about what they might do to them.”

  “So, where did you live?”

  “It sounds daft, but I don’t know. I moved around that much. They shipped me from place to place. I stayed in a few different properties. I can’t remember them all. Maybe a couple as well as the place in Chadderton.”

  “Do you know the addresses?”

  “No, but I could show you.”

  “Will you make a statement to the police about what you’ve told me?”

  “No, no, I couldn’t do that.” He pushed the hair off his face and bit his lip.

  “Okay, Marcus, I understand.”

  “I was dealing, man. I’d get time if I told them what I’ve been doing.” That wasn’t the only reason he didn’t want to speak to the police. He believed his life would be in danger. “I’ve been lucky so far that I haven’t been caught. If the police arrested any of the kids and they had money on them, it got confiscated. That money still had to be paid back to the gang somehow. I used to worry about that happening. I wouldn’t have any way of paying them back.”

  I arranged to pick him up the following day, so he could show me where he stayed. The first house he took me to was in Radcliffe. Marcus sat in the front and Sasha in the back. I glanced over at him as we approached the area. He kept turning and looking out the back window. His forehead gleamed with sweat.

  “It’s okay, Marcus, we’re not being followed.” He pulled his baseball cap over his eyes. He wriggled around in the seat. We approached a T-junction. He told me to take a left, and I watched him bite his nails. The closer we got to the property, the more nervous he became.

  “You’re alright, Marcus. You’re doing well,” Sasha said from the back seat. She leaned forward and patted his shoulder.

  I eyed up the area, checking around. There was an elderly lady pushing a wheeled shopping bag, ambling towards us.

  “It’s next right, and the house is about halfway down.” I nodded. I drove slowly, but not too slow to cast any suspicion on my vehicle. Marcus put his hood up over his cap and crouched down in the seat. From his low position, he was just able to see out of the window and pointed to the house. I took a mental note of the number and continued driving.

  “You’re doing great, Marcus.” There was no one about. We drove to the second property in Whitefield. This one instilled more jumpiness in Marcus, especially as when we arrived there was a car pulled up outside. I quickly took down the registration number. Marcus jerked his body backwards out of sight. I had put him through enough trauma for one day.

  He told me he had been to other properties and that one house was on a council estate, but he wasn’t sure where and the other was a big old house, in a secluded area. It was a start and I would have another go at questioning him at a later stage if he didn’t run off again.

  I had more information to go on. I was pleased with the progress made with Marcus. He didn’t know much about the other kids involved as they were all given nicknames. He said his was Jerky because he was constantly restless. There were about five or six other kids a similar age to him that he encountered but he didn’t know any more about any of them. I asked if there was anything else that he could tell me, he said there was one other thing.

  “Oh yes, and what’s that, Marcus?”

  “As well as the drugs, they had us nicking stuff for them, especially cars.” I nodded. I already knew only too well that the Duggans were into car ringing. It would have been nice to find out more, but Sasha had to get back. There were quite a few areas of interest that involved the brothers. Hopefully, Louie would pop up working in one of them.

  Chapter 18

  Sophie

  I wasn’t going to text Jack. He said he’d gone to see Jade again. He was worried for her safety and felt responsible for her. I didn’t want to be sitting on tenterhooks waiting for a reply. He would call me when he was ready. I sighed and tried to think up reasons he wouldn’t want me there with him. I didn’t want to appear to be a desperate girlfriend who was too clingy and followed him around like a lost sheep everywhere.

  When we first got together, he said I suffocated him. I was over at his office every lunchtime and constantly texting him. I backed off after that, but it was hard when I wanted to be with him, and it hurt. My natural default setting is to be obsessive and intense. If I find something I like, I want it and I want it now. It happened in the past with drink, exercise and men.

  Jack didn’t like the attention I bestowed on him, so I had to learn to play it cool and not appear so needy. Before I met him, I hated being single even though I was more confident on my own. In a relationship, I question whether I’m good enough and need constant reassurance. It didn’t help my self-esteem with Jack, because of his good looks, plus his ex-wife is drop-dead gorgeous.

  I only met his two kids on a handful of occasions. He liked to spend the little time he had with them on his own. I suppose that was understandable, but it worried me. If he wanted a future with me, I thought he would involve me more with them. I was scared to have the conversation with him about feelings. Ignorance was bliss. I could convince myself everything was okay. I avoided listening to criticism at all costs. Too afraid to hear unwelcome news, I put up with the alternative – worrying myself silly about ending up on my own.

  Jack had the upper hand in our relationship. I would drop everything for him if he clicked his fingers. I doubted he would do the same for me, but I didn’t trust the outcome enough to test the theory. He was married to his job, and I had to either accept that or get out. He worked long, unsociable hours to keep his business afloat and to be there when his client group dictated it. I knew that was one of the reasons his marriage ended.

  Some days, like today, his lack of sensitivity and his indifference got to me. I wanted to help him, but he was too independent. My body felt heavy as I walked into the kitchen. My stomach made some loud grumbling noises. I took a spoon to the pan of chilli. It tasted good.

  Licking my lips and nodding my head, I contemplated whether to eat mine or wait a while longer and see if he
arrived. I decided I’d give him another thirty minutes. What should I do to make myself busy while I waited? I walked into the lounge. My hands fluttered, and I forgot what I’d come in for.

  The phone rang, and I glanced down at the screen. It was my sister, Steph. I looked at the clock and felt a pang in my stomach. It wasn’t her usual time to call, and I wasn’t in the mood for chatting to my elder sister. Part of me said let it ring, but curiosity got the better of me and I pressed my thumb down to answer.

  “Hi, Steph.”

  “Hi, Soph, how are you?” Her tone sounded upbeat which made a pleasant change as she was often the bearer of bad news.

  “Not bad, to what do I owe this pleasure?”

  “Tim and I have got some news.” I nodded, not the royal ‘we’ I got that accompanied a telling off. The corners of my mouth went down. This was a good sign. It wouldn’t be Steph expressing her opinion about some aspect of my life she didn’t agree with. She was never happy about the way I conducted my affairs and liked to interfere at every opportunity. She constantly held me in judgement and took great delight in telling me.

  “What is it, Steph?” The first thing that came to mind was they had bought a new car or were moving to a new house. They loved to brag about their possessions, especially Steph.

  “I’m pregnant.” They’d been trying for a baby for so long I’d forgotten. I squealed with delight.

  “Oh, that’s brilliant news. Congratulations. I’m so pleased for you both. Gosh, I’m going to be an auntie,” I said with a big grin on my face. “How far gone are you?”

  “Twenty weeks.”

  “Twenty weeks and you’re only just telling me now?” I swallowed hard and frowned.

  “Yes, we wanted to wait until everything was okay and I was past the danger period, before telling anyone.” I could hear the nervousness in her voice.

  “But I’m not everyone, Steph. I’m your sister. Surely you could have told me and Dad.”