Rap, rap, rap, rap.
Liz came to her senses, rearing back, breaking the kiss. Breaking our glorious connection.
Fuck.
Her face scarlet, she mumbled, “Um…someone’s at the door.”
I leaned away, turning to scowl at the door.
Yeah, Luke and Mateo were here.
And their timing was terrible.
CHAPTER SIXTEEN
Liz
Ryan got up to let Luke and Mateo in. I stayed where I was, my face on fire, my lips still tingling from Ryan’s kiss, my body alive and restless with need. Dear God. That kiss…
Ryan had completely consumed me. Each time he kissed me, I wanted more. And more. While he’d been kissing me, I’d forgotten all about my vow to never let a man like him near me. Why couldn’t I resist him? How had he broken through my walls? One minute we were battling it out with number games, the competition fun, the lightheartedness of our games helping me to relax, to trust him. And the next moment, he was kissing me, teasing me, tormenting me until I begged him for more. Until I admitted I wanted him.
And God, did I want him.
If his friends hadn’t shown up…
My face grew hotter as Luke and Mateo strode into the room. I quickly lowered my gaze, too embarrassed to look at them for fear they would know exactly what Ryan and I had been doing.
“Sorry to interrupt,” Luke said, though his tone said he wasn’t sorry in the least. “It seems we arrived at the wrong time.”
I jerked my head up, meeting Luke’s gaze. He winked at me then. He actually winked, and my face went hot all over again. Luke chuckled softly, his gaze darting to Ryan and back to me again. This time, the look he sent me was appraising. I swallowed nervously and looked away. What was he searching for? Why did I feel like a specimen beneath a microscope under that intense stare?
Mateo let out a snicker, and I glanced over at him. The dark, lascivious look he sent me made a chill creep down my spine. There was something cold and calculating in his eyes.
My hand shook as I snatched my glasses up from where Ryan had set them on the nightstand. I slipped them on and I peered up at Mateo again, this time seeing clearly with my glasses. The calculation was gone from his eyes, and I couldn’t be sure if I’d imagined it or not.
I glanced over at Ryan to see him eyeing Mateo warily. Had he witnessed the way Mateo had stared at me? Or had I only imagined that look?
Ryan and Luke exchanged a long glance that I was unable to interpret. What did that look mean? What was going on?
I needed some time to compose myself after that kiss. Some time to get away from all the testosterone in the room, and the knowing looks Luke and Mateo had sent me.
I headed into the bathroom and closed the door, then leaned against it with a sigh.
What had I gotten myself into? What had I been thinking, letting Ryan kiss me?
If I hadn’t agreed to have a drink with him tonight, none of this would have happened. I would be home in bed asleep right now, and I never would have known what it felt like to be kissed by Ryan.
Heat curled deep in my core. Why couldn’t I resist him? Somehow, he’d gotten me to let down my guard. Somehow, over the past few hours, I’d grown to like him. He was funny. Smart. Handsome as sin. I truly enjoyed being around him. I loved playing those number games with him. A true friendship had been developing between us. But then he’d gone and kissed me, and now I was confused all over again. What did he want from me? Was he just toying with me? Playing with my heart? And if I was foolish enough to give in, what then? Would he pack up and leave me behind, wipe his hands free of me? Or would he stick around, get to know me better? I was too scared to hope for that. I’d been burned before. I needed to remind myself what had happened the last time I’d trusted a player. I couldn’t let myself be played like that again. I was already growing too attached to Ryan. It would be all too easy to fall for him. I had no doubt he could break my heart.
Keep your distance, Liz. Don’t be a fool.
A knock came at the door, then Ryan’s voice, “Liz? You okay?”
Crap. How long had I been in here, lost in thought?
I shoved away from the door. “Yes. I’m fine.”
A pause. Then, “Luke and Mateo went to get a room. You can come out now. You don’t have to hide from me.”
I didn’t answer. I didn’t want to admit that I was hiding from him and the way he made me feel.
“Liz,” he said gently. “What’s wrong? Did I scare you? If so, I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to.” He sounded so sincere.
I hesitated, then unlocked the door and pulled it open. Ryan stood in the entryway, his gaze cautious as he stared at me. I had originally thought his amber eyes were predatory. Now I thought they were truly beautiful. Unique. There was nothing predator-like in the way he looked at me right now. In fact, the way he was gazing at me now could only be described as tender.
Something in my chest fluttered.
He held his hand out to me. “Come on. Let’s finish the game.”
Was he referring to the number game, or the kissing?
Again, I hesitated, staring at his outstretched hand. When I was around Ryan, I felt extra small because he was so big in comparison. Easily six-two or three, he dwarfed my five-foot-four-inch height. And wearing his too-large clothes made me feel frumpy and unattractive. Plain. I’d never really been the type of girl who paid a whole lot of attention to my appearance, only wearing minimal makeup and dressing up only when I had to. I was acutely aware of how I might look right now, and how Ryan might view me.
I knew I wasn’t his type. Just like I hadn’t been Jeremy’s type. Players didn’t go for nerdy girls like me, unless they were out to win a bet. I couldn’t help it if I was suspicious of Ryan’s interest in me. What did he truly want?
“I don’t bite,” he teased. He snagged my hand and gently pulled. I took a step toward him, then halted.
“I don’t want to play anymore.”
If I didn’t know better, I would think that was hurt that flickered across his face before he let go of my hand and stepped back. “Oh, okay…fine. No problem.” He turned and strode for the armchair across from the bed and plopped down into it, avoiding my gaze.
My heart sank. Had I hurt his feelings? It was so hard to trust him after what I’d gone through with Jeremy. It was hard to trust any man after that. Was I being unfair to Ryan? Judging him like this, comparing him to Jeremy?
What if Ryan was being genuine with me? What if he really did like me? What if I was just being paranoid?
He pulled his phone out of his pocket and swiped the screen. I took that as my cue to let him be, so I walked over to the bed. Setting my glasses on the night stand, I slid back underneath the covers. Across the room, Ryan’s sexy voice reached my ears as he talked to someone on the phone.
“Give me an update on Ellington.” He paused, listening for a moment. “You told the FBI that Ellington may be heading for Oklahoma? Well, I guess you’re already on top of it, then.” He paused again as he listened. “Yeah, Luke and Mateo are here now. They went to get a room. I’m not sure what to do about my mom yet. She’ll just have to stay in Oklahoma City for the time being. I don’t dare go to her yet. I don’t want to put her in any more danger than she’s already in.” He sighed. “Yeah. Well, call or text me if you have any news. Thanks, man. Later.”
I slowly sat up. Ryan’s gaze landed on me in the bed, narrowing slightly, before moving away as he stuffed the phone back in his pocket.
“Who was that?” I asked.
He pulled his gaze back to mine. “Noah.”
I didn’t know who Noah was, but I nodded anyway. “What’s the plan?”
He rose from the chair. “For now, we stay put, and give the FBI time to track Ellington down. Tomorrow, you can go shopping for some clothes and things.”
It seemed silly to me to buy more clothes when I had plenty back at my apartment in Medicine Park, only twenty minutes away. But if it was
too dangerous for me to go home, then I didn’t have any choice.
“I’ll pay for your clothes,” he added, “since it’s my fault you can’t go home right now.”
“Um, okay. What about the inn?”
He shrugged. “I don’t know. You’ll have to call Glenda and figure that out between the two of you.” He turned toward the door.
Wait. He was leaving? Why did that bother me so much?
Panic set in.
“Don’t go,” I blurted.
He halted, then slowly turned to face me. His gaze searched mine. “If I make you uncomfortable, Liz, then I should leave. I’ll stay with Luke and Mateo in their room.”
I swallowed hard. “I don’t want you to leave. I…” I drew in a deep breath, slowly exhaled. “I’ll tell you the truth about why I’m so distrustful of you if you stay.”
Heat washed into my face.
Seriously, Liz? You’re going to trust him with the truth? What if he uses it against you?
I considered that for a moment. A few hours ago, Ryan had been a stranger. Now, I felt like I knew him. He’d opened up to me. He’d told me about his past and about being a dreg. He’d trusted me with his truth, so why shouldn’t I trust him with mine? Ryan had a fun personality, friendly, easy-going, genuine. He was a jokester, a tease. We’d played several different number games together, and I had enjoyed every moment I’d spent with him. Ryan was certainly unlike any man I’d ever known. He’d saved my life tonight. And he was keeping me safe now. I did trust him, I realized. He hadn’t given me any reason not to trust him. It was nothing more than my own fears and insecurities that kept getting in the way and kept me from believing Ryan might truly be interested in me.
“The truth?” he repeated, his gaze on mine.
I faltered. “I, uh, got burned really bad a few years ago. As a result, I’m wary around men, especially good-looking ones like you.”
“I’m not sure how I’m supposed to respond to that,” he murmured. “I can’t help the way I look. You keep comparing me to the other guy. I’m not him, Liz.”
“I know you’re not him. I just…” I broke off, lowering my gaze. “I’m just wary, okay? And it’s so hard for me to believe you might truly be interested in me. I mean, you could have any woman you wanted. Why would you want me?”
He strode forward, pausing near the edge of the bed. “Why would I want you? Well, jeez, I don’t know. Maybe because you’re gorgeous, and sweet, and funny, and kind, and genuine, and smart, and sexy as hell. I could go on and on…” His eyes twinkled as he gazed down at me. “If I told you I was truly interested in you, would you believe me? We get along well, Liz. You know we do. And the sexual chemistry between us is fucking out of this world. If you give me a chance, I’ll show you how good it can be between us. I backed off with the flirting earlier because I could see it was making you uncomfortable, and I didn’t want to scare you away. But I in no way lost interest in you. I still want you, Liz. Even more so now that I’ve had the chance to spend these past few hours getting to know you better. You and me, we just click. I know you feel it, too, Liz.”
My heart pounded as I stared into his eyes. “And if I give in to you? What then?”
Confusion crossed his brow, then a teasing glint entered his eyes. “What then? Hell, darling, if you give in to me, I’ll feel like I’ve died and gone to heaven, but there’s no rush. I would never pressure you into anything you weren’t ready for. I want you to be my friend first. I want you to trust me first. And when we do make love, I don’t want you to have any regrets.”
Heat snaked through me. He was talking as if he had no doubt we would make love. How could he be so sure of that?
You’re going to give in to him, Liz. You know you are.
Ryan lowered himself onto the edge of the bed. “You want me to stay?”
I lifted my gaze to his. “Yes, please.”
He reached over, covering my hand with his, making me jump. “Okay. Tell me your truth.”
Oh God, it was so easy to get lost in his eyes.
I jerked my gaze away. Silence stretched.
I dragged in a breath, then slowly puffed it back out, letting myself relax. Then I told him about Jeremy, something I never expected I would do. Ryan had a way of calming me, making me feel comfortable when I was with him.
“It was stupid, really. It was my own fault. I should have known better than to fall for a guy like him. I should have known he was only after one thing. He was so good-looking. Guys like him never noticed girls like me. But I was so flattered by his attention. My instincts told me he wasn’t truly interested in plain old me, not when he could have all those pretty girls who always flocked around him.” I sighed. “But he was persistent, and he kept asking me out until I finally said yes.”
Ryan tensed next to me, his jaw clenching, and I wondered if I should go on. “I don’t understand why you think you’re plain, Liz. You’re fucking gorgeous, you hear me? You’re smoking hot. It pisses me off when you say you’re plain.”
My face burned. He thought I was gorgeous? Smoking hot? Really?
My breath caught.
He’s messing with you, Liz. Don’t fall for it.
What if he’s not? What if he really thinks I’m hot?
I didn’t know what to think. Ryan confused me. I couldn’t tell if he was being serious or not.
Another long moment of silence stretched.
“Go on,” he said gently. “Tell me the rest.”
I didn’t know if I wanted to tell him the rest. I stared down at my hands, suddenly uncomfortable.
“It’s okay, Liz,” he whispered, “You can talk to me. I won’t tell anyone what you tell me. My lips are sealed.” He winked.
I let out a soft laugh and relaxed. I really liked Ryan. And deep down I didn’t feel like he was trying to deceive me. He seemed so genuine.
So had Jeremy.
“Okay. Well, anyway, we dated for several months, and he kept putting the moves on me, trying to get me into bed, but I was reluctant, holding back, unsure of his true intentions. Then, he was extra romantic one night, and I finally gave in to him.” My face grew hotter. “I’m embarrassed to admit I was pretty much in love with him by that time. He’d been pursuing me for months, and I was so flattered by his attention. Anyway, afterwards, he left quickly, saying he had to be up early to study for finals the next day. I was a little hurt that he wanted to leave so quickly after I’d finally given in to him, but I told myself I was just being silly. He was gone for about a half hour before I noticed he’d left his wallet on the nightstand. I tried to call him to tell him, but he didn’t answer, so I got in my car and drove over to his place to give it to him. In hind sight, I should have just waited to give it to him in class the next day. But I thought I was in love and I was eager to see him again.”
Ryan squeezed my hand, giving me the strength to go on.
“His roommate opened the door for me, and said Jeremy was in his room. Anxious to see him, I hurried and slipped quietly into his room. But he wasn’t alone. There were two women in bed with him.” I shook my head at my stupidity. “God, I was such an idiot. He’d gone right from me to them. I realized then he’d only been using me. I was just another notch in his belt. But that wasn’t the worst of it,” I went on softly. “I backed out of his room, stunned and hurt by what I saw. His roommate was in the living room with another one of his friends, complaining because he’d just lost the bet he’d made with Jeremy. I halted as I heard those words. His friend asked what bet he was talking about, and he said he’d bet Jeremy he could never seduce the shy, nerdy girl from his business management class. That it would be impossible to get me to ‘give it up’.” I swallowed hard as a tear trickled down my cheek. “That had hurt so bad, knowing Jeremy had only seduced me to win a bet.”
Ryan tensed next to me. “Where’s he at now?” he growled out. “I’ll kill that bastard for you.”
I choked out a laugh. “It’s okay. I’m over it.”
&n
bsp; “No, you’re not,” he said, his gaze serious. “You’re far from over it. You won’t date because of that bastard. You won’t give me a chance because of that bastard. That means you’re not over it, Liz.”
I lowered my gaze. He was right. But he didn’t understand. I couldn’t go through another heartache, another humiliation like that ever again.
Just give Ryan a chance. You enjoy being with him. And when he kisses you, it’s amazing. Don’t you want to know more? Feel more?
“I’m a patient man,” he said softly. “I’m also persistent. When I see something I want, I go after it relentlessly.”
I jerked my gaze to his, heat scalding my cheeks. Was he saying what I thought he was saying? Part of me wanted to just give in right now, while the other part of me still cringed back, saying wait, hold off, don’t let him use you.
“I’m not giving up,” he said huskily. “I want you, Liz, and I’ll wait for you. As long as it takes.”
What? Was I hearing him correctly?
He rose abruptly, as if he needed to get away from me. “Why don’t you get some sleep? Tomorrow I’ll buy another car and take you to get some clothes.”
I hesitated, my gaze landing on his. I wasn’t tired at all. My mind was still reeling from his comments.
I’m not giving up. I want you, Liz, and I’ll wait for you. As long as it takes.
“Tomorrow, will you, uh, teach me how to shoot a gun?” I blurted.
He grinned. “Definitely. We can drive out of the city somewhere and find some targets to shoot at.”
I smiled back. “Thank you. I will feel better if you show me how to do it, so that if I’m faced with a dangerous situation, I will know how to defend myself.”
“Me, too. In fact…” He strode over to the duffle bag full of guns and moved things around inside, then pulled out a small handgun. “I think we’ll use this one. It should work well for you.”
I nodded. “Okay.”
Ryan moved over to the chair near the table and set the handgun on the table.
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