The Underdogs Box Set - Books 1-3 (gay rockstar romance)

by K. A. Merikan

  “I just don’t want to disappoint you,” Dawn said, whimpering when Mage pressed his lubed-up fingers between his buttocks.

  Teasing the puckered skin made Mage groan. To think that a few months ago Dawn wouldn’t have even let Mage see him naked, and now here he was, allowed to admire Dawn in all his glory. Like a precious porcelain figurine to be handled with care.

  And the fact that they’d come to this point told Mage he was doing something right. Nobody else could see this side of Dawn, and being the only one made his pride explode with bright fireworks. “You could never disappoint me,” Mage said, taking his time, even though just knowing that his fingers were touching Dawn’s hole infused his blood with lust. But he needed restraint. All the good things needed waiting for, and he’d learned this long ago.

  He moved his body and kissed Dawn’s lips while his fingers kept teasing the wrinkled skin that felt even smoother and more delicate than the inside of that sweet, sensuous mouth.

  Dawn twisted enough to deepen the kiss, and it was the complete acceptance Dawn communicated without words that made Mage’s heart soar. He even stroked Mage’s thigh as Mage used more lube to be sure he wouldn’t hurt Dawn. At least they didn’t need to worry about anyone knocking on the door, because even Dusk and Lolly knew there were limits to ‘pranks’.

  Without rushing, Mage barely slipped the tip of his finger into Dawn, watching him for reactions. At this point, Dawn was thoroughly relaxed, but he still opened his eyes to look at Mage once the digit slowly ventured inside.

  The hole molded itself to the girth of Mage’s finger. Incredibly smooth, it sucked it in, as if a part of Dawn physically needed him inside. Mage whimpered, his dick pulsing when he imagined it taking the place of the finger, caressed by those tight walls, only to push deeper, into the softness beyond the sphincter.

  “That… feels incredible,” he whispered.

  “I’m nervous, but don’t pull away.” Dawn hooked his foot on Mage’s shin to be closer.

  Even though blowjobs were technically similar in the sense of allowing someone’s cock inside your body, Mage knew this would be different. Dawn opened up to him so eagerly, his slim shoulders rising and falling with every deep breath, and Mage couldn’t wait to see the movement speed up once they fucked. Made love.

  He nodded and gently shifted the finger, trying to stretch the surrounding muscle while kissing and massaging Dawn’s shoulders. “Yeah? Does it feel good?”

  “Y-yes. It’s very sensitive,” Dawn whispered, arching toward Mage’s touch ever so slightly.

  Mage took his time despite the burning need in his balls, but when he pushed in two fingers instead of one, Dawn didn’t tense up and actually grunted in pleasure, curling his toes against Mage’s shin.

  “Can you imagine how it’s gonna feel when I’m inside you?” Mage whispered into his lover’s warm ear and pulled on it with his teeth.

  “I want your cock.”

  Hearing Dawn’s raspy voice was like honey poured straight over Mage’s ego, but just the fact that he was saying such things had another layer of arousal dripping into Mage’s cock. The clash between Dawn’s innocence and the vulgarity of his words felt intimate, because Mage had never heard him say anything filthy before they’d gotten together. It was as if Dawn was letting him to roam the depths of his beautiful mind in ways he allowed no one else.

  He was careful and slow with the preparation, and only when Dawn’s sphincter felt relaxed around three of Mage’s fingers did he decide to take things to the next level. He didn’t ask Dawn any questions, for fear of stressing him out, but kept kissing his neck as he put on the condom and coated it with yet more lube. Shifting closer, he lifted Dawn’s leg, but the fear of hurting his lover kept him from following his primal instinct. His eyes shut, and he breathed in through his nose, trying to think logically, despite the erratic pulsing in his cock. A movement later, he had the head resting at Dawn’s entrance and gently pushed.

  It slipped in with barely any resistance, and Mage put his palm on Dawn’s throat when Dawn let out a groan. Hot breath tickled Mage’s hand with every gasp Dawn made, and it was only when he calmed down and relaxed again that Mage pushed on.

  “Please, yes,” Dawn whimpered.

  “Yes,” Mage confirmed, practically deaf from the blood rushing through his head. His other hand found its way around Dawn’s cock, and he slowly pumped it while his own sank in deeper until it was nestled inside Dawn’s warm body in its entirety. Ecstasy danced all over his skin, creating jolts of warmth between him and Dawn, and when he tightened his arms around the steaming hot body, it felt as if they were in a place beyond time.

  As they rocked together, Dawn put his hand over Mage’s, while reaching back with the other, eager for more touch. This position was clearly a winner. They were so very close—skin against skin with sweat as the only barrier. Mage buried his face in Dawn’s fragrant hair and savored the delicious mixture of the fruity shampoo, male arousal, with a hint of gingerbread. And what a delicious combination it was!

  But everything paled next to the state of absolute fulfillment of holding Dawn in his arms while his dick got buried inside that beloved body time and time again. Dawn accepted each of his thrusts, moaning shamelessly and pushing his cock into Mage’s fist, his ass clenching rhythmically.

  It was everything he could have hoped for. A sense of connection that surpassed any other experience he’d had to date. He and Dawn floated on the waves of a warm ocean, no longer separate.

  When he came, pleasure exploded out of him to the imaginary sound of hundreds of champagne bottles popping, and he hugged Dawn more firmly, clinging to him when his body started feeling like it weighed a tonne.

  As he nuzzled Dawn’s nape, gasping for air, he took his time pleasuring his lover until he teased an orgasm out of Dawn too. With his hand sticky, and his cock softening inside the warm body, he couldn’t have been more sated.

  Dawn still trembled in Mage’s arms when he turned around, only continuing the lazy delight of being together through kisses. But even in this state of completion, Mage wouldn’t have missed the dampness glistening on his lover’s cheeks.

  Just like that, Mage’s brain sharpened again. He wiped away the damp streaks. “I’m sorry. Tell me what’s going on.”

  Dawn clung to him the moment they separated. “It’s okay, I’m just so overwhelmed. I love you so much it feels like my heart could break apart.”

  Mage tried to remain calm and breathed evenly while he gently rocked Dawn in his arms, riding the sense of absolute belonging. “I love you too. And this is only the beginning. If your heart cracks, then I’ll be there to hold it together, hm?” he whispered, nudging Dawn’s neck with his nose.

  Dawn nodded with a smile and curled up against Mage. Holding his slender body close was like being home. When he touched Dawn under the roof decorated for the holiday season and with the heater providing enough warmth to stay naked, Mage held the embodiment of the soul he loved so much. Touching was about more than physical pleasure, and it transcended any other intimacy he’d experienced before Dawn.

  Dawn swallowed, watching Mage from under the long curtains of eyelashes. “I’ve actually… I’ve been working on a new song for a while now, and couldn’t really work out what it needed, but it started coming together when we kissed for the first time. I finished it with you in mind, trying to at least put some of my emotions into words. Would you like to hear it?”

  Mage’s heart jumped, and he pressed a chaste kiss to Dawn’s lips. “Of course.”

  Dawn reached for his acoustic guitar without leaving their cozy bed, and no matter how celestial the emotions Mage felt for him were, the purely visual enjoyment of seeing Dawn bend over and stretch sent a tingle down his body. He quickly disposed of the condom and looked at the pale skin that was still covered by sweat and a pink flush.

  Dawn tied back his hair with a smile, and Mage could hardly remember seeing him so comfortable in his own skin. As soon as he had th
e guitar in his lap, Dawn seemed to know exactly what he was doing.

  “Just bear with me because there still might be a few tweaks needed.”

  Always far too modest for his own good. But Mage appreciated him for that, too.

  When the delicate fingers hit the strings, the melody cascaded down Mage’s shoulders, relaxing them with the kind of warmth only acoustic music could carry. Dawn looked into Mage’s eyes when he started singing. Not only was the song for Mage, but he would also be the first one to hear it.

  Dawn’s voice had a gentle quality to it that worked well without any rendering—warm and smooth cocoa Dawn loved so much. But it was the honesty of the lyrics that took Mage’s breath away. Dawn was often too shy to speak his mind, but words he must have rehearsed hundreds of times flowed from his lips with ease.

  A moment of truth

  I felt your shadow touch me for the first time

  Since then, it has always been you

  You. Forever. Always.

  When I first saw you,

  Lemonade buzzed in my veins instead of blood

  The fizz went straight to my head

  You. Forever. Always.

  Your lips are sweet ecstasy

  Your arms the fortress I’ll always call home

  You are the knight at the gate

  You. Forever. Always.

  It’s for you that I breathe

  It’s for you that I’m ready to break all the rules

  It’s for you that I long at night

  You. Forever. Always.

  Yeah, baby, it’s always been you

  You pushed me into adulthood

  You, my only

  You. Forever. Always.

  Mage swallowed hard. He didn’t feel vulnerable very often, but the song cut him open and touched him in a way no other before it had, and while he couldn’t speak without the risk of his voice breaking, he clapped loudly as soon as Dawn finished.

  “That’s… beautiful,” he said in the end, scooting closer and hugging Dawn along with the guitar.

  Dawn laughed despite his eyes glistening again. Mage had never met anyone as sensitive. Like an Arabian horse prone to get skittish at the smallest insect moving in the grass, Dawn needed to be handled with care, and protected. Not because he couldn’t make his own choices or because Mage didn’t trust him, but because such gentleness needed to be cherished, not crushed by the world and its constant rush for power and success.

  Mage sighed and tickled the underside of Dawn’s chin before pressing their foreheads together for a moment of absolute contentment. “I’m sure Dusk will perform this well, but he can’t do it like you.”

  “It’s okay, he always gives the songs his own spin.”

  Mage moved his hand down Dawn’s forearm and covered his fingers. “Yes, but it’s a shame other people can’t hear it like you intended it to sound. Maybe one day, if you feel like it, you could be the one to perform it?”

  Dawn swallowed, never taking his eyes off Mage. His hair was rarely out of his face, and somehow his flushed cheeks looked even cuter now. “I’ll think about it. I do sometimes wonder what it would be like to sing in front of a crowd.”

  Mage smiled, and the sense of warmth inside him spread through his limbs. Maybe their relationship could be therapeutic for Dawn in some way? Pull him out of his shell and help him show people just how amazing he was. He deserved so much more than touring with the band he wrote most songs for.

  Perhaps one day, Mage would see him in the spotlight, where he belonged alongside his art.

  Chapter 13

  Mage needed to get over the weird sensation that danced down his back when Dusk sung the words Dawn had written about their relationship. The song was different in this rendition, more sexual, harsher, and surely Dusk’s thoughts were drifting to Lolly not his baby brother, but the situation still struck him as odd. Dawn was there too, just off the stage. The life he put into the melody and lyrics was present in the air, and if Mage could sense it, then so could the fans. The energy of the song sparked against his own sweat when the final chords echoed through the sound system and above the open field that was their venue tonight.

  They were done, and the sea of faces filling up the field went mad for the song that hadn’t yet been officially revealed in the media. Someone screamed ‘Dully forever!’, but what they didn’t know was that the song was all about Mawn. Or Dage. Depending on who was the presumed—Maybe it was for the better to not have a couple name after all.

  It took another few bows before the fans let them go, but at a New Year’s gig, with another band playing right after, and a tight schedule, there was no time for an encore. The stage manager was already rushing them off, so they waved their fans goodbye and left the stage, but that meant being away from prying eyes. The moment Mage’s eyes zeroed in on Dawn’s glowing face, he pulled him into the air and smacked their lips together in glee.

  His lover’s mouth was strangely reluctant this time so Mage quickly put him down, but the wide green eyes guided his own gaze to the far left. Mage’s feet froze to the floor, and a frosty sensation branched out throughout his entire body.

  At first he spotted a couple who were not dressed for the occasion. He wore a blazer, she was in a pencil skirt and high heels, which surely dipped into the dirt. But then he looked at their faces, and instantly knew why they were here.

  “Mom. Dad. Hi,” he said so weakly they might have not heard him at all.

  His mind went blank so he reached for the only safe haven he knew and held Dawn’s hand. He’d been meaning to tell them he was in a serious relationship. In fact, he’d considered telling them tonight. But he wasn’t prepared just yet. Dawn squeezed his hand back.

  Dad was the first to speak, and while he was addressing Mage, his attentive eyes were focused on poor Dawn so intensely he might have seen through the pale skin and into his flesh. “We promised we’d come to see you play one day, so we looked up the dates and here we are.”

  Mage finally shook off the stupor that had overcome him the moment he saw them, and put his arm around Dawn, since there was no point in beating around the bush anymore. With his head still filled with burnt molasses, he walked up to his parents and cleared his throat. “Oh, who let you in backstage?”

  Mom’s lips were a tense line, even though it was from her that Mage got his full mouth. “Your manager? Asher? I thought you were the manager.”

  Mage wiped sweat off his forehead and pulled Dawn that bit closer. “Oh, we’re developing, and Asher has experience. We’re working together as the managerial team,” he said, though his voice faltered under the weight of two disapproving stares. “Anyway, you’ve met Dawn Hill.”

  “Yes,” Dad said in a voice that sounded dull like a tombstone lodging into place, heavy and final.

  “What is it that you’re trying to tell us?” Mom added curtly.

  Dawn stared at his own shoes, so Mage couldn’t see his facial expression, but was wary of Dawn’s body language. He breathed in and glanced back at her. He was so done with all this. He was an adult, earned his own money, and had his shit together. Why should he be so apprehensive just because someone disapproved of his choices?

  “Dawn and I are a couple. I wanted you to know that.”

  Dad faced him with a stern expression, and it was frustrating how much that felt like looking in the mirror. “Is that so? Since when are you gay? I thought you told me it’s not something you can ‘catch’, and yet here we are.”

  Mom took a deep breath and produced a smile that appeared weirdly honest. “Dawn, sweetheart, would you mind letting us talk to Magnus alone?”

  Mage squeezed Dawn’s shoulder, taken aback by his father’s attack. He’d expected some resistance or surprise, but not anything this aggressive. “Not before you apologize to him!”

  Dawn waved it off, slouching. “It’s okay.”

  “No, it’s not,” Dad said with a sigh and briefly massaged his temples. “I got carried away. I’ve always been okay w
ith your sexuality.” Clearly not true. “I’m just trying to understand the situation, I apologize.” Spoken like a true lawyer. All he wanted was to get to his goal faster—talking to Mage alone.

  Mage swallowed hard and slid his arm off Dawn, instantly feeling like he’d been left in the middle of the ocean, floating away from his anchor. “I’ll find you guys, okay?”

  Dawn nodded frantically, and his eyes briefly strayed to Mage’s parents. “We’ll be in the trailer,” he mumbled and soon disappeared with the others.

  Mom and Dad urged him farther away from the stage for privacy, and each step drained Mage’s earlier enthusiasm and happiness out of his system as if he were bleeding. There were still people around, preparing for the next gig in the line-up, but as they left the tent that made up the main backstage area and neared the pyramid of beer kegs intended for later use, he was glad to discover the area was semi-private. The broken bottles and empty glasses dotting every horizontal surface only added insult to injury, since he did not miss the way his mom shied away from touching anything.

  “I hope you liked the concert. If I knew you were coming, I’d have made sure you had seats,” was the first thing that came to his mind.

  Mom pursed her lips. With her tiny leather bag and relaxed hair, she couldn’t have been farther from the typical gig goer. “It was… entertaining, even if loud. The crowd seemed to enjoy themselves. I suppose that’s what matters.”

  Dad shook his head. “Let’s not change the subject here. What is going on with you, Magnus?”

  Mage chewed on his lip, trying to appear as calm as possible, even though his stomach was rolling with nerves. “Nothing is going on. I told you, I am in a relationship, and we are very happy.”

  Mom stroked his arm. “But baby… You’ve had girlfriends before. That Layla girl was very nice. What happened with that?”