Student Seduction

by Caisey Quinn

  And that’s what I hope our children and our children’s children always know. That whether or not she seduced me while she was a student, or I seduced her, the love we share is real and will endure forever.

  And probably even long after that.

  The End.

  A Note from the Author

  This is the first book I’ve written with so much of my own personal history weaved in. Creative liberties were taken, and innocent and even not-so innocent people were protected. Mostly.

  One innocent person might be implicated, and if you happened to have gone to high school with me, please know that he was an innocent bystander. Bless him. But he is so many things a young girl would fall for, I embraced him as my muse to tell this story. It is still, for the most part, fictional. Even so, writing this was therapeutic. The words flew from my fingers like magic and I even lost consciousness a time or two because I wrote myself to sleep, literally unable to stop. These pages contain the chances I took and the ones I always wondered about. The risks, the rewards, and the what ifs are all right here in one way or another.

  The truth is, at the time, some of the choices and encounters that inspired this story made me feel ashamed and used—even ones that I pursued relentlessly. Mostly I was seventeen and confused AF the majority of the time. But like Emersyn, I learned that we only get one life and looking back, there honestly isn’t a single thing I would change.

  No, I take that back.

  I would’ve judged myself less harshly. I would’ve been bolder, braver, and fearless. I would’ve allowed myself the freedom to explore relationships, to make the first move, and been more myself than who I thought everyone expected me to be—than who I thought everyone would approve of and be proud of.

  Your story is yours, mistakes and all. Regrets, flaws, mis-steps, epic failures… Like grammatical errors, when we’re young and inexperienced there is this fear that one wrong move will define you or destroy you. Fail you. Sink you. So you hold your breath and try to please everyone, even at the cost of your own happiness. Hold your breath too long and you will suffocate the little girl inside who believes her life is her own.

  I almost did. Several times.

  But she was stronger than even I knew.

  One of the most import elements in book writing is character growth. If an author does a truly solid job, you can see your protagonist’s arc when you go back and re-read the beginning and realize they aren’t the same version of themselves you saw at the end. They’re better, stronger, smarter. Because they messed up, fell on their faces, and learned from the dozens of mistakes they made.

  Guess what? I messed up so much, y’all. SO MUCH. Many, many, MANY times. I was weak. I was afraid. I was impressionable and desperate for attention at times. I hated the reflection in the mirror. I struggled to get out of bed. I placed value and spent my time and energy on all the wrong things. And people. From my teens right on into my thirties. I lied about my sexual history, denied my hopes and dreams—even to myself—and downplayed my successes so I didn’t accidentally overshadow or offend anyone else.

  But all of that brought me to where I am now. Exactly where I belong, living my best life, because I finally learned to stand up for me. I finally learned to accept who and what and how I am.

  This is me and me is no longer a people pleasing pushover.

  I argue. I love. I curse on occasion. I stand up for those who matter to me in the face of the biggest, baddest enemies. I protect what’s mine, including my own wants, needs, hopes, and dreams.

  And I still screw up.

  I miss deadlines.

  I get sidetracked.

  I forget to return texts, calls, and emails. Even super important ones.

  I take on too much.

  I waste money and overdraw my account.

  I waste precious time.

  I worry about things I can’t control like it’s a professional pastime.

  I forget the one thing I went to the grocery store for on a regular basis.

  I suck at budgeting, still struggle to say no, am terrible at time management, and am so directionally challenged I will get lost going somewhere I’ve been a hundred times.

  I hardly ever remember to floss.

  I almost always gain the weight back.

  The only thing that’s really changed is I don’t hide these things about myself anymore. I keep them proudly on display. I give people the full disclaimer upon meeting them. If they hang around anyway, God bless them. It’s not always easy, but I wake up every day accepting who I am, loving her, being proud of the woman I’ve become despite the entire world’s effort to make me more like something or someone else.

  I read a quote, probably on Pinterest, where someone said “I am stitched together entirely of flaws and good intentions.”

  Amen.

  Life can sometimes feel like being held underwater, but if you don’t drown, the person you will be when you come up for air might surprise you by being really, truly amazing.

  If you take nothing away from this book other than another forbidden student-teacher romance or some hot sex scenes (I tried, y’all), that’s okay. But if you’re still reading, go look in the mirror.

  Go. I’m totally serious.

  See that person looking back at you?

  You are everything.

  You are your past, your present, and your future. You are all you ever have been and everything you ever will be rolled into one irreplaceable package.

  The best part? This? Right now?

  It’s not even the end of your story. You don’t even know how amazing you are yet.

  You are not the sum total of your triumphs and your failures. You are the soul underneath them.

  You are imperfect, and unique, and damn it, you are still fucking standing. You are the survivor of everything you’ve gone through thus far.

  You are capable of so much and you deserve so much.

  Some circumstances, people, worldly things, will impose on you, and at times what you’re experiencing will be completely out of your control. Your reaction is what defines you. The strength, fortitude, and grace with which you handle success, adversity, failure, fear and everything else life throws at you is what makes you, YOU. You control the e/affect you allow it to have on your character, on your soul, and how you move forward because of it.

  You get one life. One.

  Live the ever-loving hell out of it.

  One last thing, then I will set you free and let you move on to the next book. I’ve even provided some of my favorite forbidden romances below.

  We learn from our mistakes. We mature with experience. We grow from damage.

  Don’t be afraid to fail. I think Maya Angelou once said something along the lines of don’t punish yourself for not knowing what you didn’t know before you learned it.

  Love yourself. Celebrate yourself. Who you are, who you’ve been, and who you’re working on becoming. Share your gifts with the world. Share your successes, your failures, and the hard lessons you’ve learned, with those lucky enough to know you.

  You’re the only you there is.

  Some lessons have to be learned the hard way and that’s okay. Push through. Every single day.

  Above all else, never, ever give up on your someday. Like Emersyn, I had a someday. Someday I would see my books in bookstores. I can’t tell you how amazing it was when my someday came time and time again.

  And if you feel unappreciated and like no one else in the world cares about you, know that I am thankful for you. I am thankful that you took the time to read these words and allowed me to share my experiences, my finest moments, my failures, and my gifts with you.

  Thankful beyond words.

  Forbidden Romance Recommendations

  Dark Notes – Pam Godwin

  Birthday Girl – Penelope Douglas

  Unteachable – Elliot Wake originally published as Leah Raeder

  Priest – Sierra Simone

  Thoughtless – S.C. Stephen
s

  Loving Mr. Daniels - Brittany Cherry

  Scoring Wilder – R.S. Grey

  Misconduct – Penelope Douglas

  Hush Hush – Lucia Franco

  Acknowledgments

  Thank you to every author who ever penned a forbidden romance. It’s a risk that takes a lot of courage. And thank you to every reader who read and reviewed them without judgement. You gave me the courage to write my own story, to give Aiden and Emersyn permission to be imperfect.

  I am grateful every day to my husband, who supports my dreams and my future while accepting me for me, flaws and all. Thank you for loving me not in spite of my past but because of the woman it helped me to become.

  My children are the most precious, adorable creatures and without their unconditional, unfailing love, I don’t know if I’d even know what love was. I promise to always let you make mistakes and do my very best to let be you. Even when it turns out you’re not just a mini-version of me. (Thank goodness!)

  Both of my parents tolerated my turbulent teen years with the patience of saints. In a million years I could never repay them. I can only hope to channel their superhuman strength when my own children are teenagers. My mom is the strongest woman I know. She survived so much and came out better, handing out so much more love than she ever received. She never judged me, never belittled me, and has become my very best friend over the years.

  To each and every reader, reviewer, and book blogger still picking up my books even though my writing career has been almost as rocky as my adolescence: Thank you. You are the only reason I get to do what I truly love. I will never be perfect, but I will always give you my very best.

  Thank you for letting me be me.

  Playlist

  You’re Gonna Be Okay - Brian & Jenn Johnson

  Homecoming Queen - Kelsea Ballerini

  Bad Blood – Ryan Adams

  Tear Myself Apart - Tate McRae

  October - Alessia Cara

  Best Part - H.E.R. feat. Daniel Caesar

  Ghost - Halsey

  Creep – Ember Island

  You Don’t Know – Katelyn Tarver

  Love - Lana Del Ray

  Run & Hide (Acoustic) – Sabrina Carpenter

  Detention - Melanie Martinez

  Shameless - Camila Cabello

  Best Mistake – Ariana Grande

  What Now – Rihanna

  Say You Love Me – Jessie Ware

  Trampoline - Shaed

  Ruin – Shawn Mendes

  Look After You – Aron Wright

  My Heart is Open – Maroon 5 feat. Gwen Stefani

  Memories - Maroon 5

  I Never Told You – Colbie Caillat

  Hiding My Heart - Brandi Carlile

  Avalanche – Nick Jonas feat. Demi Lovato

  Happier - Marshmello & Bastille

  What If I Never Get Over You - Lady Antebellum

  Just a Feeling – Maroon 5

  Lover - Taylor Swift

  Somebody to Love - One Republic

  Stone Cold - Demi Lovato

  Words - Skylar Grey

  Undone - Haley Reinhart

  Wherever I Go (Acoustic) - One Republic

  It’s You - Ali Gatie

  Feel Again – One Republic

  Remember - Lauren Daigle

  Live My Life – Imagine Dragons

  Extensive playlist can be found on Amazon Music and Spotify!

  About the Author

  Caisey Quinn is the bestselling author of more than 15 full-length books, including the Neon Dreams and Nashville's Finest novels. She splits her time between a small town in the middle of nowhere in Alabama, where she lives way out in the woods, and Nashville, TN. She lives with her husband, two-year-old son, and eight-year-old daughter.

  Since beginning her career with the indie release of Girl with Guitar (Kylie Ryans #1) in May of 2013, Caisey has achieved a great deal. Keep Me Still was a top 10 Amazon best seller for 3 weeks in 2015. Both Last Second Chance and Falling for Fate made it into the top #40 rankings on Amazon and Barnes and Noble and remained there for several weeks in 2016. Her first traditionally published novels, Leaving Amarillo, Loving Dallas, and Missing Dixie, were published in 2015-16 and were followed by the Nashville's Finest novels (Intermix/Berkley) Lit Fuse and Live Wire in 2017.

  Her first traditional publishing deal came from Avon/William Morrow (HarperCollins) and was a significant 3 book deal for the Neon Dreams series. She continues to publish independently as well as traditionally. Her latest novel, Blood and Lace was published by Pocket Star Books (Simon & Schuster) under her new dark erotic romance pen name, Trinity Scott.

  Caisey is a huge fan of her fellow romance authors and enjoys reading, trying new recipes from Pinterest, and pushing herself to run long distances without dying. You can find her online as @CaiseyQuinn and www.caiseyquinn.com.

  She is represented by Kevan Lyon of the Marsal Lyon Literary agency.