The Breaking (The Curse of the Regina Book 1)

by A. P. Marie

  As his eyes fall on me, the Caidens clash. He is still dressed and styled like other Caiden, but the look on his face as he looks at me is my Caiden. He swoops me up in his arms and spins me in a circle like he did that last night in his apartment. I squeak and giggle and the déjà vu intensifies. That night though there wasn’t a low grumbling growl coming from the throat of any god-like men in the room and now there definitely is.

  The look on Zander’s face as he watches Caiden hold me in his arms is so extreme it’s almost comical. Angry doesn’t even come close to describing his expression and some part of me likes it. I like that I can elicit this sort of response from him.

  As soon as Caiden sets me down, I step back from him and Zander stops growling at us. Zander’s anger isn’t what made me step back though. My anger is.

  “You knew.” I throw out and it’s clearly an accusation. “You were my best friend. I trusted you. How in the hell could you lie to me?” I don’t mean that rhetorically. I really want to know how he managed to lie to me so much without me ever knowing.

  “Come on, Emily. I am your best friend. That isn’t past tense. I had to lie. It was for your protection. I had to keep you safe.” Zander scoffs in the background.

  “But how? I can tell when people lie. But never, not once, did I suspect you of duplicity.” Maybe I rely too much on my other sense, but I had never known it to fail me. At my question Caiden looks at Zander questioningly and he shakes his head ‘no.’ When Caiden looks back at me, he looks slightly abashed.

  “We can deflect your gift. My cousin and I. It’s one of the perks of the royal bloodline. Other Nephilim’s powers don’t work on us. I was able to trick your gift into thinking it was hearing the truth from me.”

  He scratches the back of his neck and hangs his head slightly. I can feel what he means now. When he speaks now there is no response at all. My sense isn’t telling me whether he is lying or telling the truth. He must be completely blocking me now without sending me a fake response.

  I turn to look at Zander. “You can do this too?” I ask quietly and he nods his head. “What have you lied to me about?”

  “Nothing. I haven’t blocked you in any way since you have been here.” Truth… or at least, I think.

  Now it’s Caiden’s turn to scoff. “Playing the good guy? Not sure that’ll really work for you for very long.” He glares at his cousin.

  “Somebody had better start talking. Now.” None of this makes sense. My Caiden has no reason to be standing here and yet…

  The confusion and anxiety are starting to wear on my body, and I feel my body start to crave Zander’s touch. As if he can hear my thoughts, he reaches his hand toward me without looking away from Caiden. I move into him and he wraps his arms around me. My body relaxes instantly. When I turn around, the look on Caiden’s face screams betrayal. Instead of commenting on our touch he looks at his cousin.

  “Have you told her about the prophecy?” Caiden asks Zander over my head and I feel Zander’s chin bob up and down on the top of my head, his hand making soothing circles over my lower back.

  For some reason, the comfort doesn’t feel as complete this time. I relaxed into Zander right away, but now I can feel something urging me to leave his arms. It feels like a faint echo of the same craving I have for Zander only this one is pulling me away. I look at Caiden curiously and his eyes show slight surprise at my expression.

  “Does she know what her parents did?” Again, Caiden is speaking to Zander but this time I feel his chin move from side to side.

  “Maybe we should sit down?” Zander asks me and I nod.

  We move together to the sitting area beside his desk and I sit in a single chair where Zander cannot sit with me. I physically want his touch. My body is craving him still, but I feel like I need a few minutes without him to make it through this conversation. Also, now that I’m out of his arms that other craving seems to intensify, and I need to understand that.

  “When your parents learned of the prophecy they went to the council and begged the council not to pair us. Unfortunately, the council wants what is best for the Nephilim as a whole and if losing you in the process accomplished that, then they would pair us for that reason alone. Your parents argued that you could save the Nephilim without being mated to me. Your mother was a prophetess and she said she had seen a future where you mated with someone else. In that future you could live and still free our people. She begged them to choose that other being as your mate.” Zander says after he sits in a chair directly opposite me.

  “The council refused. They didn’t trust your mom and thought she would say anything to keep you alive. They didn’t believe she had seen another future at all. They believed the only way to save the Nephilim was to ensure you were mated to Zander and sacrificed along the way. So, they made the decision and declared that you were to be the mate of Zander.” Caiden finishes dryly.

  “The problem is, your parents did not see the council ruling as final. They decided to take matters into their own hands. They found the being you had been mated to in your mother’s vision. They convinced his parents to go against the council and perform a secret mating ritual that the council would know nothing about.” Zander adds in without looking at either Caiden or me.

  “The council though was prepared for your parents’ disobedience. They performed the mating ritual in secret also. They told no one of what they were doing. They took you and Zander as infants and performed the first mating ceremony. Then later that same week your parents took you and performed their own secret mating ceremony with the mate of their choice.” Unlike Zander, Caiden is looking into my eyes as he adds to the story. “The rituals start the process, but the bond strengthens over time, especially the more time spent with your mate. By the time your parents had performed the second ceremony, the first one hadn’t fully solidified.”

  “Your parents took you away and hid you amongst the humans. They believed that by the time the council found you it would be too late and your mating to their choice would be permanent. They never knew you had been double mated.” Zander looks angry now as he concludes the story and they both turn to look at me.

  “So, I’m double mated?” I ask skeptically. If I followed the story correctly that seems to be what they are saying.

  “Yes.” Caiden answers at the same time that Zander erupts,

  “You cannot be double mated!”

  “Wait, so I’m not double mated?” Confusion should be my middle name.

  “We disagree on the effects of a double mating.” Caiden says indicating Zander. “There has never been a female double mated before. Males have tried it in the past, but they usually do not survive long enough to see what the effects would have been.” I smirk because I know how that story ends.

  “I believe that the first mating is your true mate. There may be some residual effects from the ceremony performed after, but that person is not your mate. It is not possible to be double mated.” Zander responds looking into my face intently.

  He wants me to agree with him and a large part of me wants to reassure him. This connection between us is definitely growing, because I can feel a deep need to please him. I want him to be proud of me. However, the me that I was before Zander showed up in my life, needs to hear this whole situation out.

  “I believe that both are your mates but that you will need to choose one male as a mate. It is not possible to have two paired mates. We have been able to get by for so long because the final mating ceremony has never been performed. When it is, the connection to the other will disappear.” Caiden says with an intensity like he is giving me a puzzle that he needs me to solve.

  “She is mine! I can feel our connection. It is growing daily. She belongs to me.” Zander rises with the anger of his outburst.

  Caiden merely turns to look at me like he is used to this kind of outburst from Zander.

  “We?” I ask Caiden. He said, ‘we have been able to get by’. “When you say “we” do you include yourself b
ecause you are invested in your cousin’s affairs or…?” I trail off.

  “I say “we” because you are mated to me also. Your parents chose me as your mate. Your mother saw a future where we were mated, and you survived. They performed the secret ceremony to bind us together, forever.”

  Holy shit. Zander and Caiden? I stare at my hands and fight the feelings of betrayal bubbling up inside of me. Caiden had been my only human friend. It was bad enough when I realized he knew what I was and hadn’t told me, but this? Caiden knows more about me than I do. He knows things about the parents that I have no recollection of. He knew the entire time that we were building our friendship that we were mates. And never- not once, did he mention any of that to me.

  Zander and I have had several discussions about this mating thing in the last week and yet, not once did he find it prudent to mention that I had been mated to someone else also. Not only that, but he never told me Caiden was Nephilim. He never told me Caiden was his cousin.

  Zander kidnapped me and has been holding me against my will. Caiden lied to me through our entire relationship. Everything I thought I knew about him was a complete fabrication.

  I stand up to leave the room. I can’t be here. With either of them.

  “Emily, wait. Please, let me explain.” Caiden can clearly see my reaction to his news, and since he knows me better than anyone in the world, he knows it isn’t looking good for him.

  “What happens if I never complete the mating ceremony? With either of you?” I don’t even look at them as I ask the question.

  “We don’t know. We have no vision to rely on for that future. There is a good chance you will never free our people in that case.” Zander, ever practical.

  Here’s what it boils down to. This prophecy says I can free these Nephilim people. People that I don’t know. Hell, I don’t even know what I would be freeing them from! I know nothing about them, and I don’t owe them anything. Least of all my life.

  “Alright, I’m out. Find a way to break the original mating ceremonies or don’t. Either way I’m out.” This time I do turn to look at them and it’s clear just how surprised they are that this is the conclusion I have come to. “I don’t want anything to do with any of this. I don’t know any of these people you want me to save. The end result here is I give up my life for them. And I won’t do it.”

  I turn to head back out into the hallway and I can feel my connection with both men. Our conversation has opened the flood gates of these connections. Where before there was nothing, now it’s like there is a cord tied around them and connected to me. The farther I walk from them the more I feel like that connection is strangling me, and I finally recognize that tightness in my chest. It isn’t stress. It was never stress. It’s some dumb connection to Zander and apparently Caiden also. And it definitely wants me to turn back around and return. The problem is, I can’t.

  I have never been one of those girls who couldn’t see my own worth. It’s not that I think I’m a supermodel with an A+ attitude. No, that’s not it. But I do know what I will accept from someone in a relationship and so far, my two options are major no-nos. I see two options from here: I either mate with a liar or a kidnapper and neither are acceptable options to me. So, I’m choosing option three. I’m choosing me.

  Something about this is bugging me though. I don’t want anything to do with these men but there are some things I have to know from them.

  “How did you come into my life, Caiden?” I need to hear him say what I know is coming. I need to hear it from his own mouth.

  “I was placed there. An agreement was made once the council learned of the double mating ceremonies. They decided that they would allow both of us some time to get to know you. They wanted to see how you would react to us and whether the connection existed with both of us.” I can hear the earnestness in his voice. He is glad to be telling me the truth now. Too late.

  “Like an experiment? They were experimenting with my life?” These are angels, right?

  “They experimented with all of our lives. We are all involved in this.” Zander says, and it causes me to look at him.

  I hadn’t considered that. They have been jerked around just as much as I have, maybe more, because they were aware of what was happening.

  “When I was fourteen someone… found me. Was it your men?” I direct my question to Zander. Since they kidnapped me this time I have been treated exceptionally well, but I can’t shake the memory of when I was fourteen and this question has been nagging me for the last week. That time, they tried to kill me. Zander is shaking his head emphatically by the time I finish.

  “No. My men were under orders to watch you but not to interfere. They never would have touched you until I gave the order to retrieve you.” Truth. Or so I think.

  “Who was it?” It’s the one loose end. If I can be sure they aren’t still out there looking for me then I can leave this room right now and never look back. I have lived human my entire life; I can continue that.

  “They call themselves the Lights. They believe the prophecy needs to be stopped at any costs.” This surprises me.

  “The Lights are Nephilim?” I cannot fathom why Nephilim would try and kill me to stop a prophecy that will supposedly save them.

  “They are. They are a radical group of fallen Nephilim. The prophecy isn’t clear on what exactly you will be saving us from. Some Nephilim believe you will rid us of the fallen Nephilim. The fallen Nephilim are not willing to risk the possibility that the prophecy means them. The Lights believe you are a threat and they have been hunting you for your entire life. If they kill you before we mate, then the prophecy will not be completed and whatever risk you pose to them disappears.” Zander answers somberly.

  “What did my mother think the prophecy was referring to? She had a vision where she saw me free the Nephilim and not die, so she must have known what I was saving them from.” Zander and Caiden look at each other before either of them speaks.

  “She believed it was your destiny to exterminate the fallen Nephilim.” Caiden answers slowly. Clearly, they were not decided on whether I need to know this now.

  I walk back over and sit down on the couch. I’m still mad at Zander and Caiden but I have never let men dictate my life for me before and I don’t intend to start now. If I leave, walk away from all of this, like I so desperately want to do, I have no guarantee that the Lights won’t find me later. I also have no guarantee that these two idiots will leave me out of their plans. I haven’t known either of them very long, but I think it is a safe bet that neither of them will let me go easily.

  “So, what’s our move?” I ask tiredly. Surprise crosses Zander’s face briefly but Caiden just looks pleased.

  “We complete our final mating ceremony.” Zander says at the same time that Caiden answers- “We train you.”

  The difference in answers is so comical I laugh out loud. Both men are staring unhappily at each other now.

  “It isn’t safe to train her until she is fully mated and has unlocked all of her abilities. We would be putting her at unnecessary risk.” Zander argues.

  “If she takes a mate without knowing anything about our community, she may always regret her decision. She needs a complete understanding of our world. While she is learning that we can start training her. It doesn’t have to be all or nothing.” Caiden implores Zander to see his argument.

  Interestingly enough, neither of them seems interested in asking me what I want. “So, I’m going to start training. We are putting a hard stop on all of this mate business.” I say as nonchalantly as I can manage. I can still feel the pull towards both men, but I don’t believe for a second that I have to have a man by my side before I can accomplish my goal.

  “Emily. This “mate business” cannot have a hard stop. Something will have to be done and the final mating ceremony completed. Soon.” Zander seems earnest when he tells me this, but I know too well that he has ulterior motives.

  “Look. Right now, if I had to choose someone
in this room to be my mate, I would choose the couch.” Zander and Caiden make exaggerated expressions of disbelief. “Really, it’s supportive. Comfortable. It’s never kidnapped me. It hasn’t lied to me. It doesn’t make decisions about my life without me. Which is more than I can say for either of you.” I give them pointed looks of disapproval to emphasize my point.

  I can already feel my anger fading. I would love to make this all about me, but I can’t. I can see that the decisions that needed made were much larger than me, and I’m okay with that. Despite my earlier anger I wouldn’t damn an entire species just to save my own skin. But I’m also not going to let them off the hook just yet. They did jerk me around unnecessarily.

  When I walk out the door, Jacob is standing guard on the other side. I have a serious guilty conscious about running out on him. Especially since I think I might have really liked him. In different circumstance we could have been friends.

  “Jacob, listen…” He silences me with the same hand motion my childhood teachers had used.

  “Honey, I beat you here. You aren’t half as sneaky as you would like to think. Next time, just tell me you want to spy on a meeting, and I’ll tell you the best hiding spots and then protect your back while you snoop.” He winks at me and smiles. See what I mean? He’s just a really likable dude.

  I smile and nod my head. I’m sure I will take him up on the offer and I feel like it probably won’t be too long from now.

  Chapter 9

  Training

  The day after Caiden’s arrival I start my training. Caiden has taken up residence in the house with us. The situation feels a little strained to me, but Caiden seems ecstatic. I spend most of my time after the meeting ignoring Zander and Caiden. I feel like I need to make a point, and this is the only way I know how to do it. Unfortunately, my connection with Zander doesn’t fade so I may be torturing myself as much as I am torturing him.