Finding Liberty

by B. E. Baker

  Before I can object or even think about it, Rob leans down and slides me across his bench seat toward the Vantage. Then he picks me up smoothly, his breath against my cheek, his voice deep and soft. “Here, I’ll help you.”

  I definitely don’t feel like a child, not in his arms.

  “I could have done that,” Trig complains. But he opens his passenger side door for Rob to set me on the smooth, black leather seat. I hope my wheelchair fits in the trunk. It’s probably rude that I haven’t come out to Atlanta before this to see Trig’s new house, but he hasn’t been here that long, and his house isn’t exactly accessible, much less his car.

  “Thanks,” I whisper in Rob’s ear. In spite of my own better judgment, I realize that I do want to see him tomorrow. “Hey, what’s going on in the morning? Trig never told me anything.”

  Rob sets me gently in the seat, his hands brushing my lower back and the undersides of my knees as he retreats. The look on his face prepares me for something I won’t like. “Tomorrow I’m going on a double date with Trig and Geo.”

  Except it’s not bad. Not at all.

  I smile. “You are? So was this whole thing, like, a joke? You’ve been texting Trig all night to set it up, or something?”

  “Yeah, it turns out I forgot about that,” Trig says. “Geo’s a little annoyed at me, since she never forgets anything. We have been trying to convince Rob and Paisley to go on a date for weeks and Rob finally asked her. We’re supposed to go hiking to see the sun rise. Early.” Trig groans.

  Hiking. Rob’s going hiking with Geo’s best friend, the one she keeps telling me I’ll love. The one who’s bubbly, and funny, and smart, and kind, and beautiful. And she hikes, clearly, which is something I will never, ever do again.

  “I’m sorry Brekka,” Trig says, “but you can totally come along.”

  Rob nods his head. “There’s even a gondola that you can take—”

  “It’s fine,” I say. “I actually completely forgot about a meeting I set up with Mom for brunch Sunday to go over trust stuff, so I need to get back immediately anyway.”

  “You do? For sure?” Rob asks. “I was going to try and convince you to stick around. In fact, we’ve got some amazing brunch spots in Atlanta. We could Skype your mom in or something.”

  “Uh, trust me, you don’t want that,” Trig says. “No faster way to ruin a meal than inviting dear old Mom along.”

  “She can’t be that bad,” Rob says.

  Trig’s laugh is genuine and hearty. “Said like someone who has never met Mother.”

  “Guilty.”

  “Let’s hope for your sake it stays that way. I’ll have Geo text you a photo so you can avoid her at the wedding.”

  “She did raise two amazing children. She’s got to have some redeeming qualities,” Rob says.

  Trig pins Rob with a look. “Have you been possessed by an alien? Are you complimenting me? Because I want to know where the real Rob went.”

  Rob rolls his eyes. “Drive safely.”

  Trig flinches and Rob closes his eyes. Lots of land mines to avoid around my family, poor guy. “Thanks for dinner, Rob. I’m glad I’ll know at least one of Geo’s friends at the wedding.”

  I lean forward and close the door. Which would have been an awesome move, except the frame for my wheelchair’s still in Rob’s car. When Trig circles around and climbs into the driver’s seat, I ask, “Uh, would you mind grabbing the rest of Gladys?”

  Trig chuckles and climbs back out. Rob’s already jogged over to help him load the pieces into the tiny trunk. With a little finagling, she fits. Thank goodness.

  “Thanks again,” I say loud enough that it permeates the glass. “Have fun tomorrow.”

  Rob frowns and I hate seeing it, but there’s no point in even trying to explain. It’s not like he and I are a good match. He might understand what I’ve been through, but I won’t sentence him to a life of titanium wheels and access ramps. Helping a buddy on the weekend is very different than staring down the barrel of a life full of accommodations and hike-less Saturdays.

  “You could bring Brekka tomorrow,” I hear Rob say to Trig. “Or we can cancel the whole thing. I’ve known Paisley for years. It’s not like—”

  I want to know what he’d have said next, but Trig cuts him off. “Of course we could. Easy for you to say, as you wouldn’t have to deal with the wrath of Geo. We are not cancelling tomorrow. She’s going on about this like it’s Christmas and the Fourth of July all rolled up and stuffed into an Easter egg.” Trig drops his voice, but I can still hear him. “She’s even talking about how great it would be to have a joint wedding.”

  Rob rolls his eyes. “Oh please. Geo will get over it.”

  Trig shakes his head. “Trust me, Brekka doesn’t care. She was probably being polite, but she didn’t want to stick around anyway. I can’t believe she came out at all. She loves being at home. Traveling’s such a pain for her.”

  I close my eyes. Trig loves me. I came out here for him. He has supported me in every single way.

  He’s still an idiot.

  I tap on the glass. “Let’s go.”

  “Sorry,” Rob says loudly. “I hope to see you again soon. I had a great time at dinner.”

  I can’t look him in the eye. He’d see how upset I am to leave. I bob my head instead.

  Trig slides into the seat and his car roars to life.

  “Hey do you have a name for your car?” I ask.

  “Yeah,” he says. “It’s a Vantage.”

  “No, I don’t mean the make. I mean like Fred. Or Tony the Tiger, or something like that.”

  Trig’s face scrunches. “It’s not orange or striped. Are you feeling okay?”

  “Yes, never mind. I was just kidding.” Rob and Trig aren’t even in the same state, let alone similar enough to be magnetically repellent. Rob’s just wrong about that.

  “But seriously, are you okay? You’re acting super odd.”

  “I’m fine.”

  Trig glances my way sharply. “Now I know something’s wrong. People who are fine don’t say they’re fine. You flew all the way out here with not a word to me. I’ve asked you to come out here every weekend since March. It’s the end of May. What’s going on?”

  I cross my arms. “Why have you been badgering Rob to ask Paisley out on a date?”

  “I’m sorry, what?”

  “Did I not enunciate properly?”

  “Where is that coming from?”

  “You said you and Geo have been trying to set Rob and Paisley up for weeks.”

  Trig shakes his head. “Rob has known Paisley a long time. Rob is Geo’s oldest friend, and Paisley’s her best friend from college.”

  “Yes, thank you. I know how they’re acquainted. I’m asking why you were pushing him to date her.”

  “I don’t know, maybe because Paisley’s hilarious, smart, and really cute.”

  “Then why don’t you marry her?” I cringe at the singsong tone I used out of habit. Ugh. I need to refocus. “Why Rob?” I ask. “Why are you trying to get him specifically to ask her out?”

  “Oh. Well, Geo thinks he’s amazing I guess. He’s tall and decent to look at. He has an okay job, and if I’m forced to say it, he’s a pretty good guy I suppose.”

  “He’s an inch away from sainthood. We spent the evening helping his war veteran friend by building him new, accessible cabinets. Did you know he does that every Friday? That’s how he spends his free time.”

  Trig rolls his eyes. “If you go for that do-gooder thing, then yeah he’s fantastic. He loves that kind of crap. He’d be better off writing a check and letting manual laborers do it. The quality would be better, and it would get done faster, but he likes the praise I think.”

  I don’t say a word.

  “Fine, fine, it’s nice of him. And yes, he also volunteers at a local soup kitchen. He and Geo go twice a month. He loves that feel good kind of in-your-face charity.”

  “The point is that you like Rob. You find him acceptabl
y impressive and big hearted.”

  “Sure.” Trig huffs. “He makes me feel bad about myself, but yes, I like him. Why are you asking?”

  “Because,” I say. “You’ve asked me to come visit you a hundred times, right?”

  He shrugs. “Maybe.”

  “And not once have you tried to set me up with Rob. You’ve never even mentioned it as a possibility.”

  “Uh, news flash. You live in Colorado.”

  “So did you,” I say. “And people move.”

  “Wait, I’m in trouble because I didn’t try to set you up with Geo’s loser buddy who fawned over her for years? Are you serious right now?”

  I close my eyes and lean my head against the window. If I’m honest, I’m mostly upset that he hasn’t tried to set me up since the accident. Not with Rob, not with anyone. He doesn’t think I’m a great match, not anymore. He’d rather pressure Rob to take out someone he’s known for years and could have asked out any time than ask out his own sister.

  The worst part is that I agree with Trig.

  I wouldn’t set me up with anyone either. Still, realizing that stings. And for the first time since my accident, I’m desperate to change my life, no matter the cost.

  6

  Rob

  I don’t sleep much. I blame Trig’s sister, but that’s not entirely fair. She didn’t make me stay out late. And she didn’t mean to make me toss and turn while dreaming of her face, her laugh, and her smile. Either way, the lack of shut-eye leaves me abnormally crabby. I’m not sure who thought it was a good idea to hike Stone Mountain at five a.m., but they were most definitely incorrect.

  Paisley’s entirely too perky when I climb out of my truck at Geo’s house at four-thirty in the morning, yawning. My eyes are still burning, and her neon pink shirt doesn’t help. I rub at my face, and when I reopen my eyes, she’s waving at me like a lunatic.

  “You guys ready?” she chirps.

  “I’ve got my bag of stuff.” Geo pats a small backpack. As always, she looks like she just walked off the set for a skin care commercial.

  Trig yawns and hooks sunglasses on the neckline of his Polo shirt.

  I blink several times. “Actually, I vote we reconvene at ten a.m.”

  “Cute.” Paisley bounds toward me.

  “Is it just me, or is her ponytail bouncing like Rainbow Dash in My Little Ponies?”

  “Dude,” Trig says. “You sound ridiculous. From now on, you need to think, ‘Would Vin Diesel say this?’ before you speak. That might help.”

  I roll my eyes. “I’m comfortable with how I sound. I’ve got three sisters, and I watched a lot of My Little Ponies. Besides, yesterday a customer told me I look like a short-haired Jason Momoa, so I can pretty much say whatever I want.” I flex my chest muscles one at a time and grin at Trig. He hates that I’m ripped. “If you’d hit the gym once or twice a week, you’d look less like Tom Hanks and more like Tom Cruise yourself.”

  Trig exhales in disgust and climbs into his Range Rover. “Let’s go.”

  “What? No quip, no witty retort?” I say. “What’s going on?”

  “Geo made him promise,” Paisley says.

  I turn my head toward her. “Huh?”

  She grins mischievously. “Geo made him promise to stop baiting you. I think mocking your comparison of my hair to that of a famous alicorn was borderline. Anything else would be a direct violation.”

  “You’re kidding,” I say. “Geo muzzled him? Yanking Trig’s chain is the best part of my day. I’m not sure if this will make today better or worse.”

  Paisley frowns. “Remind me why we’re on this date again?”

  “Oh, right.” I lean toward her and drop my voice to a whisper. “Because we wanted to get them to leave us alone.”

  She purses her lips. “That’s right, I almost forgot. Not that I’m upset this whole thing is a farce. You’re way too poor for me to ever date for real.”

  I toss a hand to my chest. “That hurts, Pais. It hurts me.”

  She shrugs. “My family has standards. What can I say? Jason Momoa man-boobs aren’t on their list, but they do require a certain level of liquidity. If I tried to introduce my parents to you, they’d lose it.”

  I roll my eyes. Paisley has been joking about her family demanding she marry a billionaire for years. Not that her family standards stopped her from dating every body builder at her gym over the past eight years.

  We all climb in with Trig and he drives a little too fast to the park. The hike is fun enough, but by the time we reach the top of Stone Mountain, Geo and Trig have realized it’s not a real date for Pais and me.

  “Why did you guys even agree to this, if you weren’t into it?” Geo asks.

  “At first we agreed as a joke, but then you two were so excited about it,” Paisley says. “We figured it might shut you up if we pretended it was real for a date or two. I didn’t realize Rob would suck so bad at faking it or I’d never have bothered.”

  I frown at her. “It wasn’t my fault they figured us out. I was doing just fine.”

  “You’re treating me like you treat your little sisters. If that’s how you act on a date, it’s no wonder you’re still single.” Paisley swats my shoulder before heading back down the mountain.

  “Who wanted to hike this early again?” Trig asks with a groan.

  “Paisley,” Geo and I say at the same time.

  “Because I hate hiking,” Trig says. “For the record.”

  “Mr. Outdoor Magazine himself hates hiking?” I ask.

  “I like sky diving. I like skiing. I like snowmobiling. I don’t hate jogging. Climbing 700 feet in elevation in an hour and a half on your own power is crappy. And that’s the nicest way I can think to say it.”

  I don’t hate hiking, but I wouldn’t cry if I could never do it again. There are lots of other ways to have fun outdoors that don’t involve as many blisters, bugs or sweaty socks. Paisley loves hiking though, and since it was supposed to be a date…

  “This gets us out of Kennesaw next month, right?” I ask.

  Paisley spins around on her apparently unblistered heel to scowl at me, and then she turns toward Trig and Geo, too. “You guys are a bunch of whiners, and you’re ruining this.”

  “What did I do?” Trig asks. “I was just wondering who set up this delightful excursion.”

  Geo grabs Trig’s hand and yanks him down the trail. “We better jog on ahead, sweetie. Let’s give these two lovebirds some alone time.”

  I fall into step next to Paisley. She bumps me with her hip. “What’s up today? You aren’t usually this crappy at pretending, and those two are so twitterpated they never would have noticed if you’d put forth even a half-hearted effort. Do you find me that detestable?”

  I shake my head. “I’m sorry. It’s not you at all. It’s that I actually met someone yesterday, someone I like. Probably the first person I’ve liked since. . .”

  “Since Geo?” Paisley grins. “That’s exciting. You could totally have brought her today, you know. It would have been better than,” she gestures between herself and me, “this weirdness.”

  I almost choke. “I wasn’t weird, and I did ask her to come along. She turned me down flat for the second time in one night and went back home.”

  “Wait.” Paisley stops in the center of the trail. “Just wait.”

  I glance around. “For what? Is the great Paisley actually out of energy? Or did you get a blister?”

  She just shakes her head.

  “What exactly are we waiting for?”

  “Shut up, idiot. You have no sense of dramatic effect whatsoever. I’m stopping to appreciate the lightbulb moment I just had. You said she went back home.”

  “How does that constitute a lightbulb moment?” I ask.

  Paisley’s eyes lock on mine like a heat seeking missile. “You met Brekka yesterday, and she lives in Colorado.”

  I open my mouth and then snap it shut.

  “It’s Brekka? The girl you like?” Paisley prac
tically squeals in delight.

  “Close your mouth. Good grief, what’s wrong with you? They aren’t that far down the road.”

  “It’s a trail not a road, dolt. And yes, they are. They probably ran down to the car and are making out right now.” Paisley taps her lip. “I heard she’s got an ethereal beauty, delicate like handmade lace, or the trill of a songbird.” She claps. “So, is it true? Is all of it true?”

  “Yes, she looks exactly like a bird. Made out of lace. By hand.”

  Paisley stomps. “You know what I mean.”

  “She’s prettier than Geo.”

  “You take that back right now, because I know that’s a lie. No one is prettier than Geo.”

  I cross my arms. “She’s delicate and understated, and I asked her out over and over and she still left without a backward glance.” Because she’s way out of my league.

  “Well, do you blame her?”

  I don’t. Paisley’s right. I’m not even a college graduate. I start back down the trail, my hands stuffed into my pants pockets. I kick every rock I see. Paisley’s hand on my shoulder startles me. “What?”

  “You’re mad. Why are you mad?”

  “I’m not smart, I’m not rich, and a discharged Marine isn’t a catch for a gorgeous, genius heiress. That doesn’t mean hearing it said out loud by a friend doesn’t hurt. I am human.”

  Paisley’s eyes flood with pity and my hands clench at my sides. “No, don’t feel sorry for me. The fact that I liked her at all is promising. It’s more than I’ve felt for anyone in a long time.”

  “You’ve always loved broken things,” Paisley says softly. “It’s one of the things I admire about you. You want to fix the world, one broken-winged bird at a time.”

  “First of all, she’s not broken just because she uses a wheelchair.” I shake my head. “But secondly, that’s not fair.”

  “Are you sure?” Paisley bites her lip. “You never even loved Geo. You just wanted to fix your friend whose heart had cracked in two.”

  “I did love her, Pais. I still do, maybe.”