Kzine Issue 7
Page 4
‘We’re keeping it quiet as possible. More atrocities. London, Manchester, Glasgow and, for some reason, Ross-on-Wye. We can’t go on like this can we? You do see, I’m sure. Bringing you into the cabinet, well, it was a calculated risk. Please, let me finish! It was a gamble, we both know that. We’ve worked hard on public perceptions, all those films with charming vampire characters. We’ve made progress at bringing people together. And you come from a fine and noble British family. But if the slaughter continues, we’ll have to review our policies, you see that?’
‘I understand what you are saying, Prime Minister.’
‘I know you are in a difficult position, caught between the interests of, well, competing groups. But we can’t have more events like last night’s. Do you follow?’
‘Is this an ultimatum, Prime Minister?’
‘Well. That’s a strong word. But, yes, if you like. The Home Secretary can’t be a part of the problem can he? If he brings peace, heals wounds, that’s a different matter. But this? Well, you see my viewpoint.’
‘Quite clearly.’
‘Good, good. Do what you have to do. Talk to your people.’
Lion nodded. The Prime Minister looked down, back to his papers. The interview was over. Lion stood and left. Deep in thought, he barely noticed the drive back towards Whitehall.
There was a chance everything would collapse now. Scarman and his dogs would ruin it all. They were useful, of course, but dangerous. He had to act.
He pulled out his ‘phone and speed-dialled as they drove.
‘Cally?’
‘Yes, Lord Lion?’
‘The contingency plans we discussed. Please put them into motion.’
‘You mean the internment clauses?’
‘I do. All the suspected trouble makers. Mobilise Special Forces as planned.’
‘You’re … you’re sure?’
‘Just do it. I shall be at home. There will be a backlash from certain quarters and I would prefer to be somewhere an angry vampire mob can’t reach me. Keep me informed.’
‘Yes, sir.’
He switched off his ‘phone. He allowed himself a thin smile. He could come very well out of this after all. The PM’s ultimatum might be just the opening he needed. He had justification for acting. If he took the credit then a grateful nation, freed of the scourge of uncontrolled vampirism and lycanthropy, would surely support him when the time came. Lord Lion, he’s a fine old British vampire, he knows what’s right and what’s not. He would lose the support of some of the undead, of course, but the majority would do little more than grumble. As they always did. This could be very, very good.
Back in his library he sat monitoring the reports as they came in from the commanders of the Special Forces deployed to round up the rogue vampires. He received other messages too, vows of terrible revenge from those being hunted. It was a shame electronic communications didn’t have to obey the Invitation and Denial rules. For some reason they could enter the house unimpeded.
When he saw everything was progressing as desired he stood from his computer and strode to the window to gaze out over the London skyline. Soon, soon, power would be his. He was ready. More than ready. Even vampire patience wore thin.
He heard only the faintest footfall before the silver blade skewered through his chest. Agony burned through him. He had forgotten what pain was. Turning round, stumbling to one knee, confused, he found himself looking up at Scarman.
‘I told you we’d meet again soon, Lord Lion.’
‘How can you be here? You aren’t invited in.’
‘Ah, but I am.’
‘No.’
Another figure walked up behind Scarman. Brabham, one arm in plaster, stepped out from behind the giant vampire.
‘I’m afraid he is, sir.’
‘You?’
‘I’m afraid so, sir.’
‘But… why?’
‘Well, to put a stop to you, my lord. If I may be allowed to say so, sir, it’s because you make me feel sick.’
Lion was on his knees now, the pain overwhelming. He looked up at both of them. ‘And Scarman… doesn’t sicken you?’
‘Not like you, my lord. See, it’s not the vampire thing. I mean, Mr. Scarman here is a fright, to be sure, but you’re something else. I know all about your designs, you see. All that talk of pure blood.’
‘Mongrel dog!’ said Lion.
‘Yes, sir,’ said Brabham. ‘I’m sure I am.’
The agony in Lion’s chest was electric now. Why wasn’t it subsiding? The wound was nothing. Lion grasped the sword by its hilt to yank it out. The metal burned his hands where he touched it, smoke coiling off. He actually screamed. The indignity of it.
‘Oh, you won’t be able to pull it out,’ said Scarman, who stood watching the scene with amusement. ‘Not that sword. Haven’t you worked it out yet?’
Lion looked down at the blade protruding from his chest. Of course. He knew what it must be. But the Lion Sword, used in ritual sacrifices for seven hundred years, the only weapon that could harm him, was held in very secure conditions at Huntersley. He’d made sure of that, of course.
‘How?’ he said. ‘How can you have this?’
‘I gave it to him.’ A woman’s voice. It took him a few moments to recognize who it was. Cally walked up to stand beside Scarman and Brabham.
‘How? It’s not possible.’
‘You showed me yourself, that weekend at Huntersley. You deactivated all the security while I watched.’
‘But, you’re one of us!’
‘I’m a werewolf and you’re a vampire. That’s not much of a similarity.’
‘No, no, I mean you’re English.’
Cally shook her head. ‘I believed in you once. The architect of the Lycanthrope and Revenant Relations Act. How ironic that seems. Now I see you as you really are. It was all just moves in a game for you, wasn’t it? And if you’d bothered to find out anything about me you’d know the man I love, the man I’m married to, is Turkish.’
‘Ah.’
‘Making our two boys, what, half-breeds? They’re beautiful is what they are. While you are a monster. And being a vampire is only a very small part of that.’
Lion slumped to the ground, the pain in his chest a vast, physical thing. He could feel it sucking the borrowed life back out of him, the blade remembering the blood it had shed.
‘Please, the blade. Remove it. I’ll do anything.’
‘Very well,’ said Scarman.
‘You will?’
Scarman reached down and pulled the ancient, silver blade from Lion’s chest. The raging flame in his chest subsided immediately. He looked up at them from the floor. Hope flared within him. They were just sending him a message. A warning. He could still succeed; it was all within his grasp now. The power he deserved. The power he was born to.
‘Give me my sword,’ he said.
‘No,’ said Scarman.
‘Why … why not?’ asked Lion.
Scarman glanced at Cally and Brabham. Both nodded; some unspoken agreement between them.
‘Because, Lord Lion, I’m about to use it to sever your head from your body,’ said Scarman, raising the silver sword high into the air.
CALL HOLD
by Steve Conoboy
Transcript of call #89,345 for use in training session seven, to be played in full with warning for content prior to playback.
Thank you for holding, we will connect you with the first available advisor shortly. Please be aware that all calls may be recorded for training and monitoring purposes.
Hold music plays. A click, a beep, and the hold music ends.
SAM
Thank you for calling the Time Spanners Inc. technical helpdesk, you’re speaking to Sam. Can I take your name and account number please.
JEN
There’s bloody dinosaurs everywhere!
A terrible screeching racket is audible in the background.
SAM
Please confirm your name and
account number.
JEN
Did you hear what I said? For God’s sake, I’m Jen, Jen Hardy! I’ve no idea what the sodding account number is. Listen, there’s a herd of…
SAM
If you go to the far right of the touchscreen…
JEN
What?
SAM
If you go to the far right of the touchscreen you will find the system settings menu.
JEN
I haven’t got time for this! Isn’t that bloody ironic? God’s sake… Right, system settings, now what?
SAM
From the drop-down menu select security. The system will automatically scan and check your fingerprint.
JEN
What’s it got to do that for? Like I’d lie about who I am! Why don’t I send you a pint of my blood to be on the safe side? As if I don’t pay enough per month to have this stupid thing drop me in the jaws of death… Oh, it’s done.
SAM
Yes, it doesn’t take long, Mrs. Hardy.
The line is muted.
SAM
So there was no need to be such a twat about it, was there?
The customer is taken off mute.
SAM
The third item down on this list should be your account number.
JEN
Five five dash one nine dash two nine dash six six.
SAM
Thank you for that, just looking up your details now.
JEN
Jesus Christ, what details do you need, my fucking bra size? Just tell me how to make this thing get us out of here!
JEN 2
(Doppler effect.) …another field, God knows where or when…
SAM
The instructions I give you depend on the software version you’re running. While I’m checking a few items, could you run me through what the problem is?
JEN
Problem? Problem?
JEN 2
…digits just flickering round and round, can’t tell when…
JEN
Dinosaurs! We’re meant to be visiting the French revolution and instead we’ve got a bunch of bloody big lizards trying to eat us! Now I’m not very good with dinosaur accents but none of them sound particularly French to me.
SAM
Okay, so we have a destination error.
JEN
Damn right we do!
JEN 2
…spotted us, they’re coming…
SAM
Now, I’m going to try sending fresh co-ordinates to your Time Span Unit, see if we can get you to the correct place. Then we can reset the Pathfinder so it doesn’t happen again.
The line is muted.
SAM
Alice, we’ve got an anomaly happening here, there’s some pretty strong echoes.
JEN
Whatever you’re doing, can you hurry up about it, they’re trying to get up the tree!
ALICE
Echoes? Great. Watch what you’re doing, these things can get weird.
SAM
Tell me about it, I hate calls like this.
JEN
Are you still there? You better not have cut me off!
The customer is taken off mute.
SAM
The co-ordinate refresh is on its way to you now. It’ll take a few moments to find its way there through the timelines…
JEN
A few moments?!
SAM
…and the Span will initiate immediately. We’ll lose contact during the Span but should pick up again once you arrive at your destination.
JEN
Where are these co-ordinates? The bloody things are jumping on each other’s backs to get at us!
SAM
You’re a fair few million years back in time so the refresh won’t get from here to there instantaneously.
JEN
Are you sure you’ve sent them? Send them again, they’re trying to chew the tree down now, we’re…
JEN’s voice is lost in a squash of white noise.
SAM
Of course I’ve sent them. It’s not as if I haven’t been doing this for six months or anything. Bloody customers.
ALICE
How’s it going?
SAM
Under control. Once we get the signal back she’ll see it’s all fine and stop complaining.
ALICE
Give me a shout if you have to do a reset.
SAM
Nah, not making a mess of my stats again.
The white noise increases in crescendo, then clears.
JEN 2
…still there? Hello?
SAM
Yes, I’m still here.
The line is muted.
SAM
Exactly like I told you.
The customer is taken off mute.
SAM
The Time Span device should be settled now. Can you tell me where you are?
JEN 2
Um, it’s another field, God knows where or when…
JEN
(Doppler effect.) …fucking bra size? Just tell…
JEN 2
…to be honest it doesn’t look a great deal different to where we were.
SAM
Okay, at least we’ve moved, that’s a good sign. Now, what does the date read-out say on the screen?
JEN 2
Not a lot, the same as it was before, with the digits just flicking round and round, can’t tell when we are.
JEN
…visiting the French revolution…
SAM
We’ll get that solved next. It’s going to require a software update. I’m going to arrange to send the patch out to you now.
JEN 2
(To someone off-phone.) They’re sending out a patch. Yeah, it’s like you said, these things are worse than PCs.
JEN
…damn right…
JEN 2
Oh crap. Oh this is just great. We’ve pretty much gone nowhere! We’re directly opposite to where we were! They’ve spotted us, they’re coming…
JEN 3
(Doppler effect.) …again! The same…
SAM
Mrs. Hardy, sit tight, we’re going to get you out of there.
The line is muted.
SAM
Alice, I got a pre-echo and a post-echo now. This is getting messy.
ALICE
What the hell have you done to get both?
SAM
Nothing! I’m doing everything I should! Standard procedure and all that crap.
The customer is taken off mute.
JEN 2
They’re coming pretty damn quick. Wait a minute, is that me over there? Is that us?
SAM
I need you to listen to me, Mrs. Hardy…
JEN 3
…going over there, they need help…
JEN 2
It is, it’s us! What the hell’s going on?
JEN
…doing can you hurry up about it…
SAM
Mrs. Hardy, I need you to not look over there. That’s your previous self, from when you first called in.
JEN 2
Wait a minute, isn’t it supposed to be impossible for us to land anywhere near our previous selves? Isn’t that supposed to be dangerous?
JEN 3
…don’t care about any of that, that me is…
SAM
It can be. Don’t approach your previous self…
JEN 2
No fear of that, the bloody meatosauruses are on us again!
SAM
…while we try to get you out of there.
The noise on the line increases again. The line is muted.
SAM
Alice, I need permission to do a random jump and I need it now.
ALICE
They could end up anywhere, Sam.
SAM
I’m aware of that, but anywhere’s a lot better than where they are. We’re on the verge of a paradox here.
> ALICE
Okay, do it.
The customer is taken off mute. The customer can no longer be heard over roars and screeches.
SAM
Mrs. Hardy, if you can hear me we’re going to force you device into a jump. Brace yourself, it’s going to happen any second.
The roars and screeches are replaced by white noise.
ALICE
How’s it going? Speak to me.
SAM
Find out in a moment. There’s half a chance that we’re going to end up with a dinosaur running around Roman Britain.
ALICE
That’s not the best news I’ve heard all day.
SAM
Tell me about it. Got it under control, though.
The white noise fades.
JEN 3
…almighty, that was a rough ride!
SAM
Apologies for that, Mrs. Hardy, but we had to get you out of there quick. Have you got any hitch-hikers?
JEN 3
No, just us, I think.
The line is muted.
SAM
No hitch-hikers, we’re in the clear.
The customer is taken off mute.
JEN
…make this thing get us…
JEN 2
…doesn’t look a great deal different to…
SAM
Oh great. Mrs. Hardy, what can you see?