One Moonlit Night

by Caradog Prichard

  And when I got to the top of the Hill, who should be sitting out in the sun under the window of Top House but Humphrey, Lisa Top House’s husband, who’d just come back from the sea. When I saw him, I thought about Huw Pen Pennog going around the Village balancing his basket on his head without touching it and shouting: Herrings … Fresh … Just out of the sea. I’d never seen Humphrey before cos it was a very long time ago when he went away. Before I was born, Mam said. He must be a very tall man, I said to myself, looking at him as I passed by, cos as he sat there with his knees pulled up to his chest, his knees were right up in the air and his bare legs were showing at the tops of his socks, and his face was yellow like a Chinaman’s.

  Whose lad are you? he said as I went past, with a voice that frightened me.

  I’m from the house down there, I said pointing.

  Come here. Come and sit here so I can see you.

  He had blue eyes exactly like the lady at the farm near Black Lake, but his cheeks were yellow instead of red, and wrinkled like brown paper when it’s been used to wrap a parcel up.

  When I sat down, he went into his waistcoat pocket and pulled a small box out and put it into my hand.

  Open it up and see what you can hear, he said.

  But when I opened the box, there was nothing in it, and I couldn’t hear anything.

  Can you hear anything?

  No.

  Put it up to your ear. Can you hear anything now, then? he said, and his blue eyes looked as though they were laughing at me. I didn’t say anything, I just nodded my head and listened, and something from inside the box was playing ding dong ding dong somewhere far far away, as though I was listening to the Church clock striking when I was on the top of the Foel, except that the bells in the box were playing a proper tune. Dew, it was a nice tune, too.

  Lor, it’s good isn’t it? I said to Humphrey. Can I have another listen?

  You have to close the lid first.

  Would you like to keep it? he said after I’d listened again.

  Dew, yes.

  Well, stick it in your pocket.

  Lor, I said, and put it in my coat pocket.

  Then he went into another waistcoat pocket and pulled out something that looked like a knife. Watch now, he said, as he held the knife in his right hand and pressed on the handle with his thumb. And the blade jumped out of the handle like a jack-in-the-box. Watch again, Humphrey said then, and after looking at me to make sure I was watching, he stabbed himself in the left hand with the knife and I saw the blade go right into the palm of his hand.

  Dew, you’re hurt, I said, expecting to see blood. But there was none. And Humphrey was rolling about laughing at how shocked I was. Cos the blade hadn’t gone into his hand at all. It had gone back into the handle.

  Hey, you’re a good ’un, I said laughing. And he had all sorts of tricks in the pockets of his coat and waistcoat.

  He was showing me another one, how to kill six Germans with a matchbox and six matches, when Lisa, his wife, called him to come into the house. Just for a minute, Lisa said.

  You wait here, I’ll be back in two minutes, said Humphrey and off he went into the house.

  I sat down where I was and took the little box out of my pocket to hear the tune again. Dew, I thought the world of that box, and I’d hear its faraway bells ringing at odd times for days after I got it from Humphrey. I could hear them without opening the box or putting it near my ear, especially in bed every night, just before going to sleep.

  Anyway, I’d put it to my ear after Humphrey went in to see what Lisa wanted, and I was still listening to it after the bells had stopped ringing. But cos I was sitting under the open window, I could also hear Humphrey and Lisa whispering to each other. They were speaking too quietly for me to hear what they were saying, but as I was listening to see if the bells were still ringing, I heard Lisa say Mam’s name. I couldn’t make out what she was saying to Humphrey. Something not very nice, I’m sure, I said to myself, cos Mam and Lisa had fallen out. Maybe she was telling Humphrey not to give me anything and to send me home. And I was frightened of Humphrey coming out and saying he wanted the box back. Dew, it’s a pity they’ve fallen out, I said, keeping a tight hold on the box in my pocket.

  But Humphrey was laughing his head off when he came back out of the house to crouch down under the window again. I don’t really remember how he killed the Germans with the matchbox. He opened the box then stuffed a match in each side between the box and the lid and put another match lengthways between them. Then he lit another match on the side of the box and held it under the match that was lengthways between the other two until that one caught light and jumped into the air. And the match that jumped was the German that had been killed.

  That’s how it’s done, you see, he said, and laughed at me with his blue eyes. That’s how to kill the buggers.

  Then Humphrey looked up and down the Hill to see if anyone but me could hear him. Do you swear? he said.

  No. I only say damn when I lose my temper.

  Good lad, said Humphrey, and spat on the floor between his knees. Don’t you ever learn to swear.

  And instead of asking for his bellringing box back, what did he do but go into his waistcoat pocket again and pull out the knife and give me that as well.

  There’s a sharp edge on it, you know, when you’ve learnt how to open and close it, he said. Let me show you.

  And he put my thumb on the handle and pressed until the blade jumped out.

  You can carve anything with this, you know.

  And he showed me how it closed. He just put the tip of the blade on the ground and pressed. And it went into the hilt and made a click.

  Lor, you’re a kind man, I said.

  Is your Mam at home? Humphrey said suddenly, after I’d put the knife away in my other coat pocket.

  Yes.

  What’s she doing?

  She was making the bed when I came out. I’ve been sleeping in it all afternoon.

  I like a little nap in the afternoon too, said Humphrey, lighting up his pipe and spitting.

  I wasn’t well, that’s why I was sleeping. I felt ill after Mam had gone to Church, and I went down to fetch her, and fell asleep in the Graveyard when I lay down waiting for her to come out. And she saw me lying across the grave asleep, and snoring as though I was drunk, and carried me home and put me to bed, and I stayed fast asleep all the time. Dew, your tobacco smells nice.

  Eh, d’you think so, lad? Humphrey said slowly as though he wasn’t really listening to me. And she carried you all the way home, did she?

  Yes, really, I said as the smoke swirled around Humphrey’s face. I like the smell of your tobacco.

  And Humphrey puffed away for a while just like the little train in the Quarry. Then he turned round, still in his crouching position, till he was facing me.

  Look, he said, tapping his pipe against the wall and putting it in his trouser pocket. Will you ask your Mam to come here for tea on Sunday afternoon with Lisa and you and me?

  She won’t come, I said sadly.

  Why won’t she come?

  They’ve fallen out, and they don’t speak to each other.

  Oooh, said Humphrey, his voice going up and down. Is that so? What did they fall out about?

  Er, it was your wife saying that Mam was gossiping about her, I said with both hands in my pockets keeping a tight hold on the knife and the bellbox. But Humphrey was roaring with laughter as he got up from his crouching position and I got up with him.

  Then he bent down and whispered in my ear: All women like to gossip, you know. And this here Lisa’s as bad as any of ’em.

  Dew, Humphrey was a tall man.

  Now, he said in his normal voice, after he’d straightened up and I had my neck bent back so I could look at him. You make her come on Sunday afternoon, and you as well. And tell your Mam, he said, going into his pocket and pulling something out in his fist. And tell your Mam, my lad, that Humphrey, Lisa’s husband, gives her this as a present.
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br />   And before I knew what he was doing, he’d put a ten-shilling note in my hand.

  Lor, you’re the kindest man in the world, I said, and ran like the wind down the Hill to tell Mam.

  Yes, really, I told her again when she refused to believe me the first time. Lisa and Humphrey want you to come.

  Alright then, said Mam slowly, the two of us will go there for tea on Sunday. Fair play to old Humphrey.

  You should have seen Lisa Top House this afternoon, Ellis Evans’ wife told Mam when she popped in on her way home from the Bridge Shop at teatime the following day.

  Mam and I were just coming back from the Village, we’d been doing the Saturday shopping, and I had ninepence in my trouser pocket. I went with Mam to the Village every Saturday afternoon and I never came home with less than ninepence. Mam would stop to talk to all sorts of people in the Street or in John Jones’s Shop where you bought the blue stuff for washing, or in Roland Jones Early Potatoes’ Shop or in the Pork Shop.

  And whoever she spoke to would say: Dear me, this little boy’s growing, or Dear me, how old is he now? or Well I never, doesn’t time fly, how old are you now, lad?

  And I was sure of a penny from everyone, and I got as much as eighteen pence sometimes on Settling-up Saturdays and I used to carry the shopping basket up the Hill for Mam when it was heavy.

  She was a hell of a show, my girl, said Mrs Evans and gave Mam another prod on the knee.

  What was the matter with her, then? said Mam.

  She was a hell of a show, said Mrs Evans again—and I didn’t understand and wanted to know what sort of show—she had false teeth and a hat and a brand-new fur, and she was walking down the street as if she owned the whole Village, with Humphrey holding her arm.

  You don’t say, said Mam, surprised. Funny we didn’t see them and we were in the street all afternoon. Poor Lisa.

  Poor Lisa what? said Mrs Evans. You’ll see. She’s so grand these days after getting Humphrey back, she’s turning her nose up at all of us.

  Then you should have seen Mrs Evans’ eyes open wide when I said: Mam and me are going for tea at Top House tomorrow.

  She gave Mam a strange look and her eyes, after opening wide, half closed again. I thought you and Lisa weren’t friends, she said.

  But Mam didn’t say anything, she just stared into the fire.

  Humphrey Top House invited me, I said. Look what I got from him.

  And I got the box of ringing bells from the dresser and opened it and put it against Ellis Evans’ wife’s ear. Can you hear the bells ringing? I said.

  No, she said, and got up to go.

  And I got this off him, too, I said, and pulled the knife out of my pocket. But Ellis Evans’ wife didn’t want to hear or see anything.

  I’d better not gossip any more, she said, making for the door. Those sailors are terrible old so-and-so’s. And my old man will go mad if he doesn’t get his tea. Ta-ta now.

  And away she went, and when I came back after seeing her to the door, there was Mam still staring into the fire. But she was laughing her head off by then.

  What are you laughing at, Mam? I said.

  I can’t wait to see Lisa in her false teeth, she said.

  6

  I WAS THE FIRST one to arrive at Church the next morning. Dew, it was a fine Sunday morning, too. The sun was shining on the clocktower and on the stone angels in the Graveyard and the bell started to ring as I went through the gate.

  Ho-lycherubim-and-Se-ra-phim we sang at the tops of our voices. It was a morning for singing, too. Huw and me always sat next to each other in the choir and we liked Communion mornings better than any other Sunday morning even though we hadn’t been confirmed. We liked watching the people coming up in a long line to kneel before the Altar, and seeing who was there and who wasn’t.

  But we had to watch what we were doing in the Choir, too, because Frank Bee Hive’s dad on the organ could see us through the mirror near his head even though he had his back to us when he was playing it. But we could do lots of things under our surplices without Frank Bee Hive’s dad seeing us.

  It was only the once that I played pinch under our surplices with Huw, and I wouldn’t have done it that time either if I’d used my eyes before we started and seen that Huw’s Mam never cut his nails for him. Hughes the Parson had just started praying and we were at it playing pinch.

  You give me your hand under my surplice and I’ll give you my hand under yours, said Huw. You can pinch me and I’ll pinch you. And the winner will be the one who can stand it the longest without shouting Ow.

  There we both were, looking into the mirror on top of the organ with our faces like wood, then bending our heads to pray, and pinching each other’s hands like hell under the surplice. I kept it up without so much as wrinkling my nose until about halfway through the prayers, when Hughes was talking about Angels and Archangels and the entire Company of Heaven. And then I shouted Ow very quietly and Huw bent down pretending to pick up a hymn book and turned his head to look at me.

  I’ve won, he said.

  When I looked at the back of my hand, it was pouring with blood and a piece of skin was hanging off. I had to put a hankie round it and keep it in my pocket till the end of the service. The scar’s still there.

  Dew, there’s some good singers in this morning, said Huw after we’d sat down after singing Holy Cherubim that Sunday. I haven’t seen it so full for ages and ages. Do you know why it’s so full?

  No.

  People want to know what Hughes the Parson is going to do with Grace Ellen Shoe Shop after her having that baby. Where’s your Mam? She’s not in her seat.

  She goes to Eight o’ clock Communion, then stays at home to make the dinner.

  We didn’t say anything else for a while cos Frank Bee Hive’s dad was eyeing us in the mirror, and Hughes the Parson and Hughes the Curate were walking up to the Altar. After they’d gone, we went down on our knees to pray. Before I joined the choir, when I used to sit in our seat with Mam, we didn’t have to kneel down, just bow our heads. But in the choir we had to kneel down because everyone could see us.

  I used to love it during prayers. Ceri, Canon’s daughter, used to sit among the altos on the opposite side from me, by the organ, and I could watch her through my fingers without her knowing, and think all sorts of things about her. Ceri was still in black and wore a veil on Sundays, cos it was just a year since Canon had died. Perhaps she wasn’t too old to be my sweetheart either, I told myself. In ten more years, I’ll be twenty and she’ll only be twenty-eight. Maybe she’ll marry me then if I ask her.

  Come unto me all ye that labour and are heavy laden, and I will give you rest, came Hughes the Parson’s voice from the Altar.

  She hasn’t got a sweetheart yet, anyway, I said. A funny thing as well, her being such a pretty girl. But she’s sure to be too upset about Canon to think about a sweetheart now. But by the time she’s twenty-eight, she’ll have stopped grieving for him, I’m sure.

  Therefore with Angels and Archangels and with the entire Company of Heaven we laud and magnify thy glorious Name, we all said together.

  Then Hughes the Parson and Hughes the Curate were kneeling before the Altar with their backs to us, and we were all still on our knees, and Hughes the Parson was praying on his own: We are not worthy even to gather the crumbs under thy Table, he said, as I peeped through my fingers at Ceri and thought about the bags of crusts and bread and butter and leftover meat that Mam and me used to carry from the Vicarage ages ago when Canon was alive and Mam used to do the washing there.

  Here they come, said Huw when we’d sat down and Hughes the Parson had finished praying and got the bread and wine ready. The men and women of the choir and the boys and girls who had just been confirmed would walk to the Altar first, and then the people would start to come up from the Floor.

  I bet Mary Plums is the first to get here from the Floor.

  I bet John Morris Gravestones is first, I said.

  Mary Plums and her two
daughters had set off from their seat on the right-hand side of the Floor, and John Morris was coming up from the left-hand side. And when they got to the lectern they were just about level pegging but then Mary Plums took a giant stride forward and pulled her two girls with her in front of John Morris.

  I won, said Huw.

  Mary Plums’ two girls had just been confirmed, that’s why she wanted to be at the front with them. And who came behind them and John Morris but Kate White Houses and Nell Fair View. They’d just had Bishop’s Baptism as well.

  Do you remember Ascension Day last year? said Huw out of the side of his mouth. He was trying to attract Kate’s and Nell’s attention but they both kept their eyes on the Altar straight ahead of them until they’d gone past us. Huw and me were being confirmed next time.

  By this time, the people from the Floor were streaming up in a long line to the Altar. Little Will Policeman’s Dad was next in line, wearing his own clothes.

  I’d never think he was policeman, said Huw.

  Nor me, neither.

  Next came Ann Jones the Shop, leaving her brother in the pew cos he’d not been confirmed before going to America. Huw and me looked down at our hymn books while Ann Jones was coming up. Lisa Top House was behind her, really standing out in her new clothes and, like Ann Jones, she’d left Humphrey in his pew cos he’d not been confirmed before he went to sea.

  Dew, what if old Will Ellis had a fit now? said Huw when Will Ellis Porter came up behind Lisa Top House. But old Will was in good spirits and gave Huw and me a sly wink as he went past.

  Little Harry the Clogs came behind him, with his hands stuffed into his sleeves and looking as though he was laughing hee-hee-hee to himself, and taking tiny little steps so that it looked as though he was running to the Altar instead of walking.

  Next came Little Jini Pen Cae’s dad, Owen Gorlan, David Evans, Johnny Edwards Butcher, Little Owen the Coal’s Mam, Jones the New Policeman looking more like a policeman in his own clothes than Little Will Policeman’s Dad did in his, and Ellis Evans’ wife, and lots of others that we didn’t know very well. Frank Bee Hive and Ellis Evans Next Door and Price the School had gone up with the first lot cos they were in the choir.