by Queen Pen
I cleared my throat, but it did nothing to dissolve the lump that was there. I wanted to say something, but my mind couldn’t come up with a response for her. Instead, we stayed silent until I shook my thoughts away and straightened my shoulders. “Hey, I think it’s your turn. Do you want to get back to the game?”
Jazzy shook her head no, “can we just watch TV instead?”
“Sure, we can, but on one condition.” I pulled back so that I could look down at her. She stared up at me with unshed tears in her eyes and curiousness in her expression.
“What is a condition?”
I laughed. I forgot how young she really was. After hearing her story, it was hard to believe that she was only seven years old.
“A condition means that I will do something for you, but you have to be willing to do something for me, too.” I explained.
She furrowed her brows in thought and then nodded, “okay, what do I have to do?”
“We have to watch TV in the living room downstairs.”
She looked uncertain, “are there other people around? I don’t like other people, much.”
I shook my head, “no. We are the only ones here right now, but if anyone comes in, you don’t have to talk to them. Deal?”
“Okay,” she got up from the floor and held her hand out to me. I laughed and took her hand, so she could help pull me up. Standing side by side, she came up to my chest. She was pretty tall for her age, but I remembered that I was tall when I was her age, too.
I lead her downstairs to the living room and she flopped down on the couch. I grabbed a grey fluffy throw blanket off the back of the couch and positioned it over her. I sat on the couch and got cozy under the blanket as well and grabbed the remote.
“What do you want to watch?” I asked.
“Coco. It’s my favorite movie. Have you seen it?”
I shook my head, “nope. Let’s see what it’s all about.”
I went to Netflix and found the movie. I hadn’t seen Jazzy smile much, if at all, but through the movie she smiled a lot. I found out that she had an amazing singing voice for a seven-year-old. I was blown away as I listened to her sing along. At some points in the movie, she was captivated and it wasn’t hard to see why. I could see the longing in her eyes, because I could feel it myself, too. Miguel got to communicate with his dead family and spend time with them, why couldn’t we, too?
Ms. Keddle walked in towards the middle of the movie and I assured her I would come and help once the movie was over. When the credits were rolling, I had a couple of tears on my cheek as I listened to Jazzy sing along to Remember Me. I had always been a huge softie when it came to Disney movies, but this one hit me differently.
Of course, Maddey walked in just as I was wiping my tears. He eyed me and Jazzy, who now had her legs thrown over my lap and was still singing along to the song. “The fuck y’all doing?”
“Watching Coco. Have you ever seen it before?” I asked.
“Nah, I haven’t seen that shit,” he said with a frown.
I glanced over at Jazzy who was too focused on the song to hear anything Maddey was saying. “Watch your mouth Madden!”
He shrugged his shoulders. “Aye, Jazzy. Why don’t you come help us out in the kitchen?”
Jazzy stopped singing and looked at Maddey thoughtfully. “Okay, but I have a condition.”
Maddey looked stricken “what the fuck you mean, a condition?”
I laughed and said “I taught her well.”
Maddey looked at me confused and Jazzy looked at Maddey considerately, “fuck is a bad word,” she finally said. Now, it was my turn to look stricken, while Maddey cracked a smile.
I shook my head and massaged my temples. I really needed to get Maddey’s mouth under control if Jazzy was going to be around.
“Man, what’s your condition,” Maddey laughed.
“You have to watch Coco with us tonight.” Jazzy said matter of factly.
“Can’t tonight,” he said.
“But you can tomorrow,” I smiled at him with my eyebrow quirked up. There was no way I was going to let him get out of this. Jazzy and I sat staring up at Maddey and it didn’t take long for him to cave.
“What the fuck ever, man. Get your asses in the kitchen and help Ms. Keddle. I have to change. I’ll be right there.”
Jazzy and I high fived and made our way to the kitchen, giggling the whole way there.
Fifteen
“B
abe, grab the door!” Maddey yelled from upstairs.
I sat the platter of chicken wings on the table that I was carrying from the kitchen and glanced at my watch as I strode to the door. It was only six o’clock and the party wasn’t set to start until seven.
I curiously opened the door and immediately slammed it closed again, more out of confusion than anything, because it wasn’t logical that those two were standing on the other side of the door. I cautiously opened the door again and tears instantly flooded my eyes.
“Slam that damn door in my face again and we’re going to have a problem!” Careena yelled as she brushed past me, her fiery Latina spirit always shining through.
Rori stood in front of me with a small smile. “Surprise!”
“What…how?” I sputtered.
“I flew them out,” Maddey said from behind me.
I whirled around at the sound of his voice and saw him entering the foyer. “How did you even know about them? How—”
“Bel, hush.” Careena laughed. “You are such a crybaby! Come here, mami.”
Tears were now leaking out of my eyes as I walked into her outstretched arms and hugged her tightly. “I just can’t believe you’re here.”
I stepped over to Rori and hugged her. She patted me on the back and I kissed her on the cheek before releasing her. She gave me one of her infamous closed mouth smiles and said, “Ryder got ahold of us.”
I turned to look at Maddey for further explanation. He shrugged, “I saw how sad you were when Noella left. I called Ryder and Briella to see if they could come out here for the weekend, but neither of them could, but they suggested I call Careena and Rori.”
My heart skipped a beat. I was excited that Careena and Rori were here, but they were closely tied to my past. Careena was very open about what she’d been through and I wasn’t sure I was ready to share that part of my life with Maddey yet. Either way, it was a kind gesture and I noticed those were coming more frequently with Maddey. I hugged him around his waist and smiled up at him. “Thank you.”
“It’s nothing. Y’all can leave your bags and shit here. Come on into the living room. Everyone else should be getting here soon.”
We followed Maddey towards the living room, but not before Careena caught sight of the food that was spread out on the table in the dining room. I laughed as she made a quick detour to check it out.
“Ohhh! Queso! Bel, you know how much I love queso! And wings! Oh my God! I am in heaven.” I laughed as she grabbed a plate without even asking and began piling it up.
I noticed that her eyes had started filling up with tears at the sight of the food and I shook my head at her dramatics, “I see not much has changed.”
Careena had the biggest appetite I had ever seen, which was crazy because she was so tiny. She could eat everything in sight and still not gain an ounce and if you asked her if she was hungry, the answer was always yes. After we were rescued from Madame’s brothel, Careena took to eating to subside her addiction. At first, Ryder and I were worried that she would start gaining a ton of weight, but when she stayed the same size four that she had always been, we weren’t too hard on her. Especially since she worked out four times a week.
Once she was finished grabbing her food, I led them to the living room, where Maddey was already sitting. There was a bar in the corner of the room and Ms. Keddle made sure that it was fully stocked for the festivities tonight. Now that Careena and Rori were here, I knew that I wouldn’t be partaking in smoking or drinking. I always made sure that I set a
n example for them because beating the drug addiction was easy for me, but for them, it was a challenge. I never wanted them to see me drinking or smoking and think that they could do the same, because they couldn’t. They were like my babies, my family, and as the oldest of the group, I became like a motherly figure.
I sat down on the couch next to Maddey, but instead of cozying up to him, I grabbed Rori, who was about to walk over to the other couch and sat her down right next to me. I swung my arm around her shoulders and pulled her close. “What have you been up to, Ro?”
She relaxed against me and shrugged her shoulders. “Nothing.”
I rolled my eyes with a smile and shook my head. Rori was the baby, still only a teenager. She was also the one that we all worried about the most. At nineteen years old, she struggled with anxiety and depression. After we lived together in the Colorado house for barely a month, things got tense with three women trying to beat a drug addiction. Rori was overwhelmed by being back in the real world. She slit her wrists one night. Luckily, I tended to keep a good eye on her and when I realized she was taking so long in the bathroom, I went to see what was going on. I found her in a pool of blood laying on the bathroom floor. She was lucky to live through that ordeal and Ryder made sure that she went to a top-notch rehab facility that specialized in suicidal teens. She was gone for six months and when she came back to live with us, she was like a new person, but she still had her bouts of depression.
“What do you mean nothing?” Careena quirked her eyebrow up at Rori.
“Reena, it’s nothing,” Rori said shyly.
“What’s nothing? What happened?” My heartbeat quickened and panic started to set in.
“Nothing bad,” Rori said looking up at me. She knew me so well. “I got my G.E.D.”
“No way!” I screeched! “Rori that is huge! You were so far behind, but you did it! I didn’t even know you were taking the class!”
“It took her a little while, but she made it through. Of course, I take partial credit as her awfully sexy and smart tutor.” Careena batted her eyelashes playfully.
“Shut up, Reena! Don’t steal her shine.” I said, throwing a couch pillow across the room at her. “I am so proud of you, Ro.”
“Thanks,” she smiled down at her lap. I squeezed her one more time, beaming.
“How the fuck do y’all know each other, anyway?” Maddey eyed me and then looked over at Careena.
Before I could shake my head or give a warning signal to Careena, she was already spilling the beans. “The brothel, duh.”
Rori stiffened next to me. She hated any mention of that place. I cringed at Careena’s words. I loved the girl dearly, but she seriously had a big mouth. That was just how she was. She was an open book and would gladly chat with a stranger on the subway about her past drug addiction and sex trafficking days. It was why she was so good at her job. She was a motivational speaker for teen girls in similar situations that we had been in.
“The fuck you mean, brothel?” Maddey grimaced and looked at me. My heart dropped under his heated gaze. Careena hadn’t been around for more than five minutes and she was already making my worst fears come true.
“Oh shit, mami. Have you not told him?” Careena eyed me.
“Not everyone is as open about that shit as you are, Reena.” Rori said quietly.
I stayed quiet and avoided Maddey’s eyes. “Rebel, I’m talking to you. What the fuck is she talking about?”
“Can we talk about this later?” I whispered.
“Nah, we can talk about it now.” He demanded.
The room fell silent as tears flooded my vision. Rori grabbed my hand and squeezed it and Careena looked at me apologetically. “Rori, Careena and I were kidnapped at young ages and sold into a brothel run by Briella’s step mother, Madame. Ryder was the one to saved us from that hellhole. It’s how I know Ryder, Briella, Noella, and everyone else. Careena and Rori were there, too.”
Maddey glared at the side of my head, but I continued to avoid his eyes. “Why am I just now hearing about this shit? You are my girl, right?”
“Yes, Maddey, but—”
“But nothing. Don’t you think that this is some shit I should know?” He growled.
Before I could answer, Careena cut in. “Maddey, I don’t know you very well, but I do know that you need to back off. This is my fault. I have a hard time remembering that Rebel and Rori aren’t as open as I am. This is a touchy subject for them. Shit, it is for me, too. I just talk my feelings out, whereas these two, bottle their feelings up and deal with it in their own. I’m sorry, Bel. I shouldn’t have spoken so freely, when I didn’t know how much you’ve told Maddey.”
“It’s out in the open now,” I said. A tear gushed out of my eye and slithered down my cheek. I caught Maddey’s eye and his gaze softened.
“We can talk about this shit later. I didn’t mean to snap at you,” he wiped the tear off my face and then kissed my cheek.
The room fell into another awkward silence before Careena spoke again. “I do want to say that I know how humble Rebel is. I know that she is going to be modest about the aftermath of what happened, so I want to make it clear that she is a saint. Her past does not define her. She was going through the same shit as us, but she always helped us before she helped herself. I literally owe her my life.”
Maddey didn’t respond. He just nodded his head and squeezed my hand. Luckily, the doorbell rang and he got up to answer it. As soon as he left the room, I glared at Careena.
“I’m sorry!” She held her hands up defensively. “You know how I am, Bel. I didn’t mean to interfere with you and your man. I can’t believe you got a man. He’s sexy, too, mami! Good job. He’s a little rough around the edges, but—”
“Cut it out!” I hissed at her. She snapped her mouth closed and I was thankful. I knew she was just trying to brighten the mood, but I wasn’t having it right now. She was lucky I didn’t like confrontation because instead of cussing her out like anyone else in my situation would do, I got up and headed for the stairs.
“Hey, where are you going?” Careena called after me. I kept walking, ignoring her. I heard Rori tell her to leave me alone and I smiled a bit at that. I could always count on Rori to have my back.
I made my way up the stairs towards Jazzy’s room. I knocked softly before entering the room. I was happy to see that she wasn’t laying on her bed and gazing at the ceiling, but instead, her and Ms. Keddle were sitting on the floor reading a book.
“Hey, you two.” I smiled.
“Rebel, what are you doing up here?” Ms. Keddle looked surprised. “I heard you have some friends in town. I thought you’d be downstairs visiting with them.”
I smiled softly at her as I sat down next to Jazzy and pulled her into my lap. It was crazy how in the past couple of days things had become so comfortable between the two of us. She giggled as I ruffled her crazy hair that had come down from the pigtails I’d put in earlier. “I just wanted to check in on this one, here.” I poked Jazzy in the stomach and she giggled again.
“She’s fine, Rebel. We were just reading.”
“Oh yeah? What are you reading? Maybe I can sit in and listen.”
Ms. Keddle looked at me concerned, while Jazzy launched into the summary of the book. “Have you ever heard of Junie B. Jones? She is so funny! Ms. Keddle got me a whole bunch of them. This one is about her first day at school!” She held the book up in front of my face.
“I used to love these books when I was your age,” I smiled down at her.
She scrunched up her face, “Junie B. Jones is that old?”
“Hey, watch it. I’m not an old grandma, you know.” I replied.
Jazzy shrugged her shoulders and snatched the book back from me. I rolled my eyes at her antics as Ms. Keddle said, “I got her covered, Rebel. You can go on downstairs.”
“You were supposed to join the party. Why don’t you go and I will hang out with Jazzy?” I asked her hopefully.
“What has gotten into
you? This game night was your idea.” She eyed me.
I sighed and looked away from her. “I just have a big mouthed friend who told Maddey something I wasn’t ready for him to learn.”
Tears clouded my vision again and I swiped at my eyes hoping that nobody would notice. No such luck. Ms. Keddle scooted closer to me and rubbed my back. “Tell me what happened.”
I glanced at Jazzy who had her nose buried in her book, pretending like she wasn’t listening. I shook my head and looked back at Ms. Keddle. “I was kidnapped when I was a teenager and forced to work in a place, where men did horrible things to me.” I knew Ms. Keddle understood what I was getting at because she nodded her head. I wanted to be extremely elusive for Jazzy’s sake. She didn’t need to hear this. “That’s how I know the friends that are visiting. They were rescued with me. Careena opened up her big mouth and told Maddey and I think he’s mad at me now. I can’t blame him.”
Ms. Keddle lifted my chin so that my head was held high, “I’m sure he isn’t mad, Rebel. He is probably shocked, but not mad. You must have forgotten that he has a past as well.”
I shrugged my shoulders, but Ms. Keddle was not entertaining my pity party. “Rebel, get your butt up and go back down to your guests. Maddey is a hard person to be around and I can’t imagine dating the man, but he likes you and that isn’t going to change just because of your past, especially since it was against your will.”
Fresh tears fell out of my eyes as I gazed at her. “I’ve done much worse things.”
“And you think he hasn’t? I’m positive that his rap sheet outweighs your own.” She said reassuringly. “Wipe your tears and get back to your party.”