The 6 Most Important Decisions You'll Ever Make: A Guide for Teens

by Sean Covey

  • “I want to be an exotic vet.” —Taylor, 10

  As a teen, if someone would have asked me that question I would have said, “I have no clue.” I was still figuring out who I wanted to ask to the junior prom.

  But as you near graduation from high school, it’s time to start thinking about what you want to be when you grow up. I didn’t say figure it out. I said, start thinking about it. Your ultimate goal should be to start building a career or profession, instead of settling for a series of jobs that don’t lead anywhere.

  The key is to find your voice. I’m not talking about vocal cords. I’m talking about finding your groove, your niche, what you were born to do.

  Imagine four circles.

  The place where these four circles overlap represents your voice. Think about them as you start plotting the college you want to attend, the jobs you take, the subject you major in, and so on. Ultimately, you’ll want to build a career that taps your voice.

  All four circles are important. For example, you may love music (passion) and even be good at it (talent), but you’ve also got to figure out a way to make a living from it (need). The chances of becoming a rock star are one in ten thousand, so don’t bet on that. You could, however, earn a living by teaching music or writing music for TV commercials and films.

  In like manner, you don’t want to wind up in a career that pays well (need) but doesn’t make you happy (passion) or tap into your gifts (talent).

  Perhaps you feel, deep in your bones, that there is something special you should do with your life (conscience). For example, Ben Kaplan, who figured out how to go to college for free, is now building his career around helping other kids get grants and scholarships so that they too can go to college. This is Ben’s special cause, driven by conscience.

  I had a nice chat with Brinlee from California. By discovering her voice, she was able to turn her life around and is now on the path to building a career.

  When I started high school in ninth grade, I was in the top program in the school. I wanted to be an overachiever at that point, but everything hit me all at once. I had family problems, and then my best friend betrayed me. I thought the whole world hated me.

  So I turned to drugs and drinking and started hanging out with, like, wrong people and partied a lot. I had a 1.1 GPA, and things were just so bad. After months of this, I woke up one morning, doped on the drug I took the night before. I thought, “I can’t do this for the rest of my life.” That same day my cousin really laid it on strong. She’s like, “Your mom’s praying every day, and you’re such a smart girl. What happened to you? I’ve been there, Brinlee, and you cannot waste your life away because you have so much going for you.”

  I stopped taking drugs all at once. I was addicted to alcohol, but after watching my dad, who was also an alcoholic, I decided I didn’t want to be like him, and finally gave it up too.

  My sophomore year came along, and I thought, “I have to change, I have to do things right.” It was then I decided to join the school newspaper. In middle school, I loved writing short stories. I’d share them with my friends, and they’d be like, “Oh my gosh, Brinlee, this is really good.” And I’m like, “It’s just a stupid story I wrote.” And they’re like,

  “No, it’s really good. I’m serious.”

  As a member of the journalism class, I started writing about five stories per issue. And the advisor of the paper said, “Wow, I’m amazed by you.” Over the next several years I worked my tail off. Now, in my senior year, I am editor in chief of the school newspaper. I also work at a local newspaper. I want to be a publisher when I grow up.

  It feels good to find something that you’re good at, because it doesn’t make you think about the negative stuff in your life. It keeps you busy, and you’re having fun at the same time. Yesterday, when I was driving home, I was thinking, “Oh, my gosh. I’m so happy.”

  Brinlee is starting to find her voice. It may take much longer for you. Be patient. I didn’t have a clear direction about what I wanted to do with my life until a few years after college. Here are a few items you might consider to help you find that voice of yours.

  EXPLORE BROADLY

  “Survey wide fields, but cultivate small ones,” goes the saying. You won’t know if you like something unless you try it. So, while in high school, take lots of different classes. There are such a wide variety of classes to choose from. Circle the ones that interest you.

  aerobics

  ballroom dance

  clothing

  film literature and history

  jewelry

  music independent study

  photography

  sign language

  study skills

  weight training

  astronomy

  ceramics

  creative writing

  foods

  journalism (school paper)

  peer tutors

  Shakespeare

  sports entertainment marketing

  TV/video production

  yearbook

  There are also numerous clubs or teams you can join. Circle those that interest you.

  academic challenge

  cheerleading

  choir

  entrepreneurship

  forensics

  Habitat for Humanity

  jazz band

  language clubs

  mock trial

  multicultural

  peer mentoring program

  theater society

  band

  chess team

  color guard/majorettes

  fashion club

  fly-fishing

  health careers club

  Key Club

  math league

  Model UN

  National Honor Society

  student council

  Look around. Sometimes a single event can ignite something in you, as it did in Justin.

  One day my dad brought home a 3-D architecture program, knowing that I have always loved designing things. He told me to install it and have some fun. That was only the beginning. In the seventh grade, my Algebra 1 teacher told the class that, for the final project, we would be designing a house. I was ecstatic. I got to work on it the next day, and finished it one week in advance. I got 99 percent on the assignment. This made me want to design more houses. One day I will be designing and building the tallest skyscraper in the world.

  You’ll also want to explore different jobs, when possible. Instead of applying for the same summer job each year, try doing something different. And, if you’re really brave, try your hand at starting your own business and becoming a teen entrepreneur, also known as a trep. Here are just a couple of examples of treps featured in a magazine for small businesses called The Costco Connection.

  Christopher Haas Enterprise

  Christopher Haas

  Temucula, California

  Chris, age 17, always had a good basketball shot. Most of his classmates, however, didn’t have the same skill. “I noticed a lot of kids didn’t shoot well because they weren’t holding the basketball correctly,” says Chris. So, he went to his garage, dipped his hands in paint, and placed them on a basketball.

  Little did he know he had stumbled on an act of genius: The handprint on the ball would show someone exactly how to hold a ball while shooting. Today, specialty sports stores from all over carry the Hands-On Basketball and the Hands-On Football. In fact, he has sold more than one million units of the Hands-On Basketball. It wasn’t an immediate slam dunk, recalls Chris. “I was rejected by 12 companies over the course of a year and a half before one decided to take a chance on my product.”

  Chris earned enough money to pay full college tuition for himself and his brother and sister. He later sold his inventions to a sports equipment manufacturer.

  Photo used with permission of Sportime, LLC.

  Luv Ur Skin

  Izzi Dymalovski

  Melbourne, Australia

  At the early age of just eight, Izzi Dy
malovski asked her mother if she could use some of her skincare products to remove makeup and residue caked on after one of her dance recitals. Her mother said that the products were meant for adults due to the chemicals they contained. They were not good for young girls still developing. Izzi’s mother insisted that she use baby products in order to clean the makeup off of her face. It can be frustrating to use baby products for young kids. Understandably, Izzi was a bit upset.

  Izzi’s mother, who worked in the biotech industry, had a suggestion for her daughter: put forth time and effort to create her own skincare products. The product formulas could be designed using ingredients that were safe for kids. Izzi created a face wash, body wash, body lotion, and face moisturizer, all of which did not contain ingredients harmful to a young person’s skin.

  Izzi immediately jumped into action and began working on a logo, brand, and even custom packaging. At the age of thirteen, she launched her skincare line and became the youngest-ever entrepreneur to appear on Australia’s reality show Shark Tank. Her products are now on shelves around Australia and they sell online globally.

  The now fourteen-year-old was named to Fortune magazine’s 18 Under 18 Young Entrepreneurs list.

  WATCH OUT FOR SERENDIPITY

  Two of my favorite words are plethora and serendipity. Plethora means “many,” as in “Would you say I have a plethora of piñatas?” Serendipity means “happy accident.” In other words, some unexpected event that turned out well. Often, serendipity can help us discover what we want to be when we grow up.

  When I first tried out for the Provo High School freshman football team, I wanted to be a running back. But, seeing that we had no quarterback, Coach Drury made me play quarterback. “Quarterback? What a stupid position!” I thought. To make a long story short, I played quarterback in high school, and got a scholarship to play quarterback for a big college, where I took a class from a teacher who inspired me to major in English, which led me to write books, which in turn affected my whole career. Had I stuck with running back, I probably wouldn’t have played football in college (I wasn’t fast enough) and probably wouldn’t have met that inspiring teacher and so many other things might not have happened. I’m so glad Coach Drury saw something in me that I didn’t. Happy accident, wouldn’t you say?

  Be on the lookout for serendipity in the form of a lucky break, an accident, a turn of events, or a person who sees something in you that you don’t see in yourself. So many times, the stumbling block you tripped over growing up becomes the building block of your future. I have a friend, John, who struggled immensely with self-esteem as a teen. Today, he has become a very successful author. Guess what? Most of his books are about how to cope with life as a teen. Sometimes we plan our careers, and sometimes we stumble upon them.

  THINK DEEPLY

  You’d be surprised at how many people end up in dead-end careers because they never really took the time to think about what they wanted to do. What should you think about? You should think about what you really like and hate doing, how much money you want to make, and what kind of lifestyle you want. If you like being your own boss, become an entrepreneur. If you don’t enjoy moving and uprooting all the time, don’t join the military.

  My brother-in-law, Matt, did it right. He decided he wanted to be a doctor. He just wasn’t sure which kind. So, during college and medical school he carefully studied various specialties. He talked with all kinds of doctors and examined their lives. What did they like and dislike about their jobs? What kinds of lifestyles did they lead? Although he was attracted to orthopedic surgery, the surgeons he knew led hectic lives and had long work schedules. So, he chose to be a family doctor instead, where he could make a good living, yet lead a more balanced life.

  Perhaps most important, do something you love. I like how Maya Angelou explained it:

  “You can only become truly accomplished at something you love. Don’t make money your goal. Instead, pursue the things you love doing, and then do them so well that people can’t take their eyes off you.”

  Although money isn’t everything, it is a strong consideration and something you should be aware of. Study this chart to better understand your options:

  SKILL LEVEL

  $ PAY

  EDUCATION REQUIRED

  TYPES OF JOBS

  Professional Careers

  Great money—upper-class lifestyle

  High school (required) Bachelor’s (usually required) Master’s (usually required) Doctorate (often required)

  CPA, software engineer, lawyer, architect, business executive, college professor, engineer, doctor, dentist, successful entrepreneur, banker

  Skilled Careers

  Good money—middle-class lifestyle

  High school (required) Bachelor’s (usually required) Master’s (sometimes required)

  Web developer, police officer, lead mechanic, draftsman, pilot, electrician, family farmer, financial analyst, real estate rep, schoolteacher, registered nurse

  Semi-skilled Careers

  Fair money—lower-middle-class lifestyle

  High school (usually required) Bachelor’s (sometimes required)

  Carpenter, auto mechanic, factory worker, store supervisor, truck driver, administrative assistant, insurance rep, car salesperson, enlisted soldier

  Unskilled Jobs

  Poor money—lower-class lifestyle

  High school (occasionally required)

  Retail sales clerk, fast food worker, waitperson, laborer, construction hand, custodian, lawn care worker, security guard, most part-time jobs

  Let me be clear. How much a person makes and the kind of job they have has nothing to do with their worth. There is dignity in all hard work, whether in high-paying jobs like a doctor or low-paying jobs like a grocery store checker. My point is: A good education gives you options. Most people in low-paying jobs are there not by choice but by default. They’d prefer a better-paying job but can’t get one because they lack the skills.

  THE VOICE FINDER

  To help you further discover your voice, try the Voice-Finder* activity on the next couple of pages.

  * * *

  * For an online, printable version of the Voice Finder, go to www.6decisions.com.

  Patience, My Dear

  If you’re still totally confused about what you want to be when you grow up, relax. There’s no rush. You don’t have to decide your profession, your major, or anything today. Just be on the lookout. Become aware of what really gets your juices flowing. Take note of what you’re good at.

  Once I was talking to some teens in Seoul, South Korea, about finding their voices and one girl asked: “What if what you love to do and what you feel you should do are different?” It was a good question. I said, “Conscience comes first, ahead of talent, passion, or need. Pay special attention to your intuition. It will come in the form of feelings, impressions, and ideas.”

  YOUR LIFE’S WORK

  When you were born, your life’s work was born with you. In other words, I believe each of us has a purpose on this earth and a special something we need to do. I love how talk-show host Oprah Winfrey describes it.

  Have the courage to follow your passion—and if you don’t know what it is, realize that one reason for your existence on earth is to find it. It won’t come to you through some special announcement or through a burning bush. Your life’s work is to find your life’s work—and then to exercise the discipline, tenacity, and hard work it takes to pursue it.

  How do you know whether you’re on the right path, with the right person, or in the right job? The same way you know when you’re not: You feel it. Each of us has a personal call to greatness—and because yours is as unique to you as your fingerprint, no one can tell you what it is.

  Pay attention to what makes you feel energized, connected, stimulated—what gives you your juice. Do what you love, give it back in the form of service, and you will do more than succeed. You will triumph.

  Today, Oprah is considered to be one of the
most influential women in the world, but she didn’t start that way. Oprah was born into poverty to a single mother. She was raised by her grandmother and experienced abuse and severe racial discrimination growing up. Through it all, however, she always felt she had something special to contribute to the world. And over many years, she slowly but surely found her voice—helping women lead happier, more fulfilling lives!

  “Yeah, right,” you might be saying. “I’m not Oprah.” I agree. You’re not Oprah, but you have unique qualities and gifts that no one else has. And surely there’s something special you can do with your life that no one else can. There are so many ways to serve and make a contribution at school, at work, or within the four walls of your own home.

  Writing a mission statement can be a great way to express your voice. This one, written by a high school girl from Kuala Lumpur, Malaysia, expresses what she wants to be when she grows up and her educational plan for getting there.

  MISSION STATEMENT

  Accountant, lawyer, doctor, scientist

  London

  Oxford

  Cambridge

  Britain

  Castle

  Malaysian Hall

  London Bridge

  Big Ben

  Trafalgar Square

  Tower

  Study hard

  SUCCESS

  THE PHEONMEANL PWEOR OF THE HMUAN MNID

  Aoccdrnig to a rscheearch at Cmabrigde Uinervtisy, it deosn’t mttaer in waht oredr the ltteers in a wrod are, the olny iprmoatnt tihng is taht the frist and lsat ltteer be in the rghit pclae. The rset can be a taotl mses and you can sitll raed it wouthit a porbelm. Tihs is bcuseae the huamn mnid deos not raed ervey lteter by istlef, but the wrod as a wlohe.

  Isn’t that amazing! And I awlyas thought slpeling was ipmorantt!