Don't Cry for Me

by Rachel Lacey

  “I’m sorry,” Josie murmured. “Why don’t we go upstairs? It can’t be comfortable for you to sit on a barstool when your back is bothering you.”

  She opened her mouth to protest, but sitting for hours on a hard wooden stool did sound tortuous, and Swanson’s didn’t open until five. “All right. Thank you.”

  “Of course.” Josie scooped up the box of kittens, pausing to lock the front door before she led the way toward the staircase in back. “We can make a video of them while we’re at it. I need to introduce them to my viewers so they can start voting on names.”

  “If you like.” She followed Josie up the stairs, settling across from her on the couch with the box of kittens on the table between them. The orange cat Eve had seen the last time she was here walked through the room and hopped up on the couch beside Josie.

  She reached over to rub him. “This is Nigel. Don’t worry. He won’t bother the kittens.”

  “Is he one of your former foster kittens?”

  “Yeah.” Josie laughed as Nigel hopped into her lap. “One of my first, and the only one I’ve kept.”

  “Lucky cat,” Eve commented.

  Josie nodded with an affectionate smile at the cat in question. “So, what are we supposed to be doing this afternoon, exactly?”

  “We need to go over all the particulars for filming, and then I’ll observe you once the bar opens. The film crew will be here around six and will stay for an hour or two, getting some initial footage.”

  “Tuesdays are my least busy day of the week,” Josie said, brow wrinkling.

  “That’s for the best, then, isn’t it?” Eve told her. “No offense, but we want to show the viewers how badly Swanson’s is doing so they can appreciate its transformation at the end of the segment.”

  “Right,” Josie said, blinking as if the reality of what she’d signed up for had just fully hit her.

  “The photos that you used in your application,” Eve said. “The ones of you and your father that show how you grew up in the bar. Where are those?”

  Josie’s lips quirked. “So you did see my application.”

  “Last week,” Eve told her. Don’t read anything into it.

  “They’re in an album,” Josie said, gesturing toward a shelf along the far wall.

  “We’ll want to film those, and I’ll ask you about him while the camera crew is here.”

  Josie blew out a breath, looking down at the cat curled across her lap. “I meant it last week when I told you to sensationalize his death, but…”

  “That’s not my intention, but we do need to tell your story. It’s a big part of the draw for Do Over, and as you noted, viewers like a sad story with a feel-good ending.”

  “And you’re still confident we’ll get that happy ending?”

  “I am.”

  “Then let’s do it,” Josie said with a definitive nod.

  She put the cat down, and they spent the next hour or so poring over paperwork. Usually, Eve felt a thrill of anticipation as she finalized her plan of attack with a new client. With Josie, though, the thrill she felt had nothing to do with anticipation. It was more of an adrenaline rush, a mixture of discomfort over the idea of spending the next few weeks in a bar and this unrelenting attraction she felt whenever she got within twenty feet of Josie, whenever she so much as thought of her.

  When the paperwork had been put away, Josie reached for the kittens, lifting the black one into her lap. He mewled softly, paws waving in the air. “It must be about time to feed these guys.”

  “Yes,” Eve confirmed. “And I’m out of formula. I ordered some of the same brand you gave me, but it doesn’t arrive until tomorrow. I was hoping you could help me out.”

  “I can definitely hook you up with more formula.” Josie cradled the kitten like a baby, stroking his belly. “Hungry, aren’t you?” She stood and walked into her bedroom, taking the kitten with her, returning a minute later with a container of powdered formula.

  Eve took it from her and went into the kitchen, familiar by now with the process. She mixed and warmed enough formula for the four kittens and sat on the couch beside Josie to feed them. They each lifted a kitten out of the box.

  “It’s soothing, isn’t it?” Josie said quietly, watching as the black kitten suckled from the syringe.

  Eve looked down at the gray kitten in her lap. “I suppose.”

  “Admit it.” Josie nudged her elbow against Eve’s. “You’ve gotten fond of them.”

  “I don’t hate them, but they’re a lot of work.”

  “You like them,” Josie insisted with a grin.

  Eve put the gray kitten back in the box and lifted the white one, ignoring Josie as she replaced the black one with his gray-and-white littermate. Once they were all fed and cared for, Josie set up a video camera on a tripod, facing the couch.

  “Time to introduce these guys to the world,” she said.

  “I’ll leave you to it, then.” Eve stood, crossing the room to get her briefcase.

  “Oh, come on. You’re a television host. You should be in it with me.”

  “No, thanks.”

  “It’s good publicity for both of us,” Josie insisted. “For someone who touts herself as a marketing expert, you should know this.”

  “I know all about publicity, thank you. I also know that, after the contract we just signed, it’s best for us not to appear in kitten videos together.” She had no desire to be in Josie’s video, nor did she have the energy for it. Already, it was going to take everything she had to get through the filming later today. “I’ll meet you downstairs.”

  Ignoring the shocked expression on Josie’s face, she gathered her things and walked down to the empty bar. She set her briefcase on the bar top, running her fingers over the glossy surface, wood encased beneath a thick lacquered finish. This was a space she needed to get acquainted with, because she’d be spending the majority of her time here for the next two weeks.

  Unbidden, a sob rose in her throat. She pressed her palms against the bar, breathing through the pain, blinking Lisa’s image from her vision.

  “Eve…” Josie’s voice filtered in from the direction of the stairs.

  “Not now,” she bit out, straightening her spine, keeping her back to Josie.

  A door shut behind her, and she was alone. She dragged in a ragged breath, wondering at the stinging sensation in her fingertips until she saw the marks she’d made on the bar top, its lacquered coating now embedded under her fingernails. Fuck.

  Leaving her briefcase behind, she walked out the front door and stood on the sidewalk, sucking in deep breaths of fresh air. She inhaled all the familiar scents of the city, car exhaust mixed with the slightly smoky scent of a nearby restaurant. Italian food, if she had to guess, based on the herbs drifting on the air.

  She smoothed her hands over her blouse, adjusting the tuck of the silk fabric into the waistband of her skirt. This was fine. She was fine. The camera crew would arrive shortly, and she’d forget everything else as long as that red light was pointed in her direction. She could bury her discomfort over being in the bar. She was an expert at burying her feelings. There was no reason for this to be any different.

  Taking one last breath, she turned around and walked back inside.

  Josie had been recording herself for YouTube for years, so there was absolutely no reason for her to panic in front of the Do Over cameras. Except…she was panicking. This was all so much bigger and more important than anything she’d ever done before. She was going to be on cable television, for crying out loud.

  If her dad could see her now…

  She’d stammered through her interview with Eve, and then she’d gotten hopelessly choked up as she took Eve—and the camera crew—through her family photos and showed them the place where her dad had died. Eve assured her afterward that it had gone well, that her emotional response was exactly what they wanted for Do Over.

  But Josie couldn’t help worrying that she was going to look like a total basket case
when the segment aired. Thank goodness for Adam and Kaia, who were in their usual seats at the end of the bar, showing their support. Josie had seen Eve interviewing them with the film crew earlier. Kaia had spoken earnestly into the camera while Adam gestured all over the place as he told who-knew-what wildly embellished story about Josie.

  Both of them had visited the bar back when her dad still owned it, although they hadn’t become regulars until after his death. At first, they’d come to offer moral support to Josie, and over time, it had become their regular hangout, along with lots of their mutual friends.

  Josie blinked, resisting the urge to rub her eyes. The Do Over team had sent over hair and makeup people to get her camera ready, and the false lashes they’d applied were heavy and itchy, but if they looked half as good on her as they looked on Eve…

  Right now, Eve stood near the door, deep in conversation with a member of the film crew. She had on an emerald-green blouse, neatly tucked into a black pencil skirt with sky-high black heels. Her hair was swept into a neat knot on the back of her head, accentuating the graceful curve of her neck.

  And Josie was one hundred percent smitten, even if she did want to strangle Eve half the time. She didn’t always like her, but she couldn’t seem to stop wanting to kiss her. Then there was that moment earlier, when she’d walked in on Eve alone in the bar, looking like she was about to cry. There had been something heartbreakingly raw and vulnerable about her, although it was long gone by the time Josie finished filming her vlog with the kittens.

  Whatever it was, Josie hated that being in her bar was so painful for Eve, both emotionally and physically, because she’d noticed Eve rubbing her lower back between takes. Surely, those stilettos weren’t helping, but it was hardly Josie’s place to judge. Here she was, working herself to the bone for this place that had been her dad’s passion, not hers.

  Josie had always loved Swanson’s. She’d grown up here. It was home. But she’d never wanted to own it. She’d never imagined spending her life behind the bar, serving drinks while her YouTube channel and her animal rescue faded into nonexistence. Someday, Swanson’s would be successful enough that she could hire a full staff to run the day-to-day operations so she could get back to doing what she loved.

  Someday.

  In the meantime, she let herself get lost for a minute watching Eve. A shaft of light fell across her face, illuminating the red sheen of her lips and the chocolate depths of her eyes. She turned to speak to another member of the crew, and Josie’s gaze dropped to her ass.

  “Someone’s got it bad for the pretty television host,” Kaia whispered in her ear.

  Josie grinned, glancing over at her friend. “No clue what you’re talking about.”

  “No?” Kaia followed her gaze. “Can’t say I blame you. She’s hot with a capital ‘h.’”

  Josie gave her a sharp look.

  Kaia lifted her hands with a laugh. “Don’t worry. She’s all yours. Actually, I had a really hot date the other night, and I’m seeing her again tomorrow.”

  “Really? Why am I just hearing about this now?” Josie focused on her friend as Kaia told her all about her date. From there, she moved down the bar to pour drinks for a couple who’d just come in. It was unusually busy for a Tuesday night, and everyone was gawking at the cameras. Obviously, word about the taping had gotten out.

  Josie tried not to notice them filming her as she worked, but it seemed like every time she looked up, those red lights were aimed in her direction. It was nerve-racking. Around nine, the film crew left, apparently having gotten all the footage they needed.

  Eve settled herself at the far end of the bar, typing busily on her phone. She’d been upstairs several times to check on the kittens, reminding Josie of the softness that lurked beneath her steely exterior, although…maybe it was better if she forgot.

  Once she’d taken care of her customers, she made her way down to Eve. She looked up from her phone, flawless and poised, and damn, her camera-ready makeup was really next level. Her eyes locked on Josie’s, a hunger gleaming there that rivaled the one Josie felt burning inside herself. And Eve’s brown eyes narrowed, heat recognizing heat.

  If Josie had had any questions about Eve’s sexuality, they were gone now. She’d already had her suspicions, deepened after she searched Eve online and found not so much as a whisper about her ever having been seen in public with a man. That, and a certain way she looked at Josie sometimes that made her wonder…

  Eve’s tongue darted out to wet her lips, and a warm flush crept over Josie’s skin, spreading heat through her belly. God, how was she supposed to work with her for the next few weeks without kissing her?

  “What’s a woman have to do to get a beer around here?” Eve said, breaking the loaded silence between them, eyes never leaving Josie’s.

  “A beer?” she repeated stupidly. Somehow, she’d internalized Kaia’s words, assuming Eve was a recovering alcoholic, but was she wrong? Or was Eve so affected by whatever had happened earlier, she was about to fall off the wagon? “I thought…the way you reacted to bars…”

  Eve’s delicately shaped eyebrows arched as she realized what Josie was trying to say. “My reasons for disliking bars are just that…mine.”

  “Right.” Of course, Eve wouldn’t give her an inch, even now. “A beer, then?”

  “Whatever you have on tap. Something light, a pilsner or an amber ale.”

  “Got it.” Josie moved down the bar to pour her a pilsner from a local brewery she had on tap. “White Horse pilsner. It’s one of my favorites,” she said as she set it in front of Eve. “I try to keep as many local breweries on tap as possible.”

  “That’s good to know,” Eve said, a thoughtful look on her face that had everything to do with Do Over and nothing to do with Josie herself.

  “Be right back,” Josie told her before moving down the bar to check on her customers. She poured more beer, a couple of shots, and mixed a whiskey sour for one of the women who’d come in earlier to gawk at the camera crew. Kaia and Adam caught her eye and waved, heading for the door.

  By the time she made it back to Eve, the beer was half gone, and Eve was looking a lot more relaxed, elbows on the bar as she looked at something on her phone.

  “Are you hungry?” Josie asked. They had been rushing around since the camera crew arrived at six without pausing for dinner, and it was now approaching ten.

  “Mm,” Eve said, lifting her beer for another sip. “I’ll stop for something on the way home.” She paused, frowning. “Except I’ll have the kittens.”

  “I was going to order something from the place next door. They have really great hoagies. Pasta too, but I’m partial to the hoagies. I’ve got their menu.” She ducked behind the counter to grab it, scooting it across the bar toward Eve. “They’ll send someone over here with the food. We just have to eat in the back so my customers don’t get jealous.”

  Eve stared at the menu, then at Josie, as if trying to think of a reason not to stay. “All right.”

  “Cool.” She headed off to check on her customers again while Eve looked over the menu, but the crowd was thinning fast now that the Do Over crew had left. There were two women at the bar and a couple at one of the tables along the back wall, although experience said she’d probably see a few more stragglers before the night was over.

  If not, she’d close early again tonight. She was exhausted, more so than usual, probably from the stress and excitement of having the film crew around. It certainly wasn’t a good idea to encourage Eve to stay for dinner when Josie was already struggling not to kiss her. But then again, something told her Eve had enough willpower for the both of them.

  She would never crack, so really, there was nothing for Josie to worry about.

  7

  Eve took a bite of her cheesesteak, her gaze sliding to the woman beside her. They were seated side by side in front of the desk in Josie’s office, so close their shoulders occasionally bumped as they ate. Not that Eve was complaining. In fact, she mi
ght have intentionally let her elbow brush against the soft fabric of Josie’s T-shirt as she reached for her beer.

  “Long day,” Josie commented.

  “Yes.” She needed to go home, to be in her own space so she could relax. Her shoulders ached from keeping herself so rigid all day, and her back, well…it was not happy with her. She needed sleep, dammit, but that wasn’t in the cards no matter how quickly she finished her food and headed out. Mental and physical exhaustion were taking a toll. Spending the day at Swanson’s had taken a toll, but at this exact moment, sitting in Josie’s office, a little harmless flirting sounded so much more appealing than her empty apartment and the long night ahead.

  “I enjoyed seeing you in your element today,” Josie said.

  “In my element?”

  “You know, with the cameras rolling. You’re a natural. You make it look easy. I felt like a bumbling idiot every time the cameras were on me.” Josie’s dimples were entirely too adorable…and distracting.

  Eve forced herself to look away. “You did fine.”

  “So have you started thinking about what you want to change? Should I be scared? Or can you not even talk about it with me when the cameras aren’t rolling?”

  “Nothing I’m ready to discuss with you yet, no,” Eve told her. “I’ll spend the rest of the week observing and doing market research.”

  “And then can you give me a heads-up before we film it?” Josie sat, hands clasped in her lap, expression so earnest, Eve could hardly bear to look at her.

  “I’m not supposed to.”

  “But?” Josie pressed.

  “No ‘but,’” Eve said, annoyed that Josie had heard her waver. “You signed up to be on a television show, so yes, you have to let us film your reactions. That’s how it works.”

  “Don’t make me cry,” Josie said with a silly smile in an obvious attempt to lighten the mood between them.

  “I never intend to make people cry.” Eve crumpled the empty sandwich wrapper in her fist as she stood. “I’ll be here the same time tomorrow. If you have any personal suggestions or requests for the relaunch, that would be a good time to let me know.”