by Janie Marie
Even though her heart was cracking, Kylie jogged to catch up with him. “Thank you, Ryder. For taking up for me, and for the ride.”
“Thank my girlfriend. I told Logan to suck my left nut and come get you himself.” He gave her a dismissive glance. “Stop staring at me like a fucking puppy. I wasn’t taking up for you. I was protecting my girl.”
Kylie dropped her gaze. God, he really could make you feel like you were nothing. She just wanted him to be a little nicer. “Why not the right one?”
“What?” He shoved some poor football player who was getting something out of a locker.
She watched the guy drop a bottle of pills.
Ryder stepped on them. “Oops.”
The football player stared at Ryder in absolute fear before scrambling away.
“That was mean.” Kylie watched Ryder squish the pills.
He leaned down, picking up the bottle and the only intact pill, inspecting it. It was a small white tablet. “Do you know what this is?”
She shrugged. “I don’t know. It’s in a prescription bottle. He probably needs it.”
Ryder shook his head as he crushed the pill between his fingers, making the powder fall to the floor. He started kicking the powder around before noticing a soda in the locker. He opened it, pouring it on the crushed pills, and started walking without bothering to clean it up. “It’s a roofie.”
Her jaw dropped as she hurried after him. “For real?”
“No, I just get kicks out of destroying medicine.” He gave her an annoyed glare. “Yes, for real.” He held up the bottle. “Unless his name is Guadalupe and he lives in Juarez, Mexico, this isn’t his. Most of the team took a trip there to smuggle this shit back. They’ve been dealing them to sick fucks who’ve been drugging girls at parties.”
She rolled her eyes. “I doubt that’s happening. This isn’t some lame movie.”
He shoved the doors open. “Do yourself a favor and shut the fuck up when you don’t know what you’re talking about.”
“I was trying to joke,” she said, trying to keep up with him.
He stopped walking and stared at the pavement as he spoke in a low but deadly voice, “If you’re making jokes about girls getting raped, you can walk your stupid ass right off a damn cliff.”
Her heart hammered away. “Sorry. If you’re serious, why not call the cops?”
He lifted his head, exhaling loudly as he started walking again. He didn’t answer her.
It was so humiliating to be in his presence, but she couldn’t deny she wanted him to keep talking to her. So she blurted, “You said he could suck your left nut. Why not the right?”
He didn’t acknowledge her and kept walking through the parking lot.
She felt so embarrassed. She never ever thought she’d even talk to Ryder, and when she did she asked him why not his left nut?
Ryder cast a glance over his shoulder at her, a mischievous smile on his gorgeous face. It stunned her, but he spoke, breaking the daze he almost put her in. “Janie owns it. The right one—no, actually, they’re both hers. But the right is her favorite.”
“Oh my God,” she whispered, grossed out but giddy as hell to have him actually joking with her.
“Nope,” he said. She almost asked what he meant but he continued. “Seems like you got your own pair.”
“My own pair of what?” Kylie kept her eyes glued to his profile, waiting for a reaction besides his normally cold expression.
“Balls.”
Her mouth fell open. “Whose balls?”
Even though he looked annoyed with her, he kept talking to her, “I didn’t think you’d take my advice and tell him you liked his ugly ass.”
“Oh,” she said, smiling. “Yeah, I guess I did. Do you think it was stupid to tell him?”
“If I thought it was stupid, I wouldn’t have suggested it.”
She bit her lip before rushing out, “Do you think it’s stupid to like someone so quickly? I mean, my stepdad keeps talking about me being dumb, and that Logan’s dangerous and so experienced—”
He pulled a set of keys from his pocket. “I fell for a girl after staring into her eyes once. She was in a serious relationship with Logan, and don’t get all emotional about that—it’s not your business.”
“I didn’t say I was emotional about it.” She was. She totally was. And it was so her business.
“Yeah, right.” He chuckled, checking something on his phone. “I fell for Janie. Hard. Everyone told me she was set up with him, that he was just waiting for her to finish school, but I didn’t care. I didn’t go looking to steal her, but what point was there in denying I wanted her? I knew I could be more for her, and I could—believe me. Logan treated her like shit, so I knew I was better for her than his bitch ass.”
As much as Kylie wanted to argue on Logan’s behalf, she wasn’t about to say Logan and Janie should’ve been left to live happily ever after.
“So I made a choice.” He pocketed his phone. “I didn’t sit there like a pussy and cry because she was taken, or come up with some dumb plan just to get close to her. I took a chance. I told her how I felt. There’s stuff that makes our relationship more intense—theirs too—but I was better for her. I knew she was mine, and I could love her better than he ever could.”
She bit her lip to keep from saying something nasty. It stabbed something painful inside her to hear someone love another girl. It wasn’t fair to be unwanted for so long while someone else was being cherished like a princess. Especially one that was cared for by Logan while she had been suffering.
“If you keep your real feelings to yourself,” Ryder went on, “how the fuck is anyone else going to know what you want?”
Words came flying out of her mouth before she could stop them, “Did she cheat on him with you?”
He glared at her. “I already told you she doesn’t cheat. She didn’t then either.”
She was terrified, but she still asked, “Then why do people think that? I even heard someone say you got her pregnant.” She’d paid attention to the whispers today because Janie wasn’t at school. People were saying she was arrested, shipped out of the country by her stepdad, or on the run. But it was the rumor that she’d gotten pregnant after cheating on Logan that piqued her interest. There was no way Logan should want Janie after she had done such a thing.
He paused, breathing hard as he closed his eyes. “People say shit like it’s their business, especially when they don’t know what the fuck happened. I suggest you forget what you heard.”
“Sorry,” she muttered.
“I don’t care if you’re sorry.” He opened his eyes and started walking again.
Kylie sighed, gripping the straps of her backpack. “Did anyone tell you you were stupid for falling in love with her like you did?”
“Not to my face. My advice is don’t give a single fuck if someone tells you it’s stupid. You might be dumb as fuck for loving that person, but you don’t have to give a fuck what anyone says. If you’re both honest and that person makes you happy, fuck the world.”
“I’ve never heard anyone use so many f-words before.”
He shrugged. “I’m impressive at everything I do.”
She shook her head as they approached a light gray Camaro. It wasn’t the same one she rode in the other day. It gave off a sense of dread, which was made worse by the license plate: SORROW. “Is this yours?”
“Obviously,” he said, opening his door and sitting. Before she could sit, he turned it on, the roar louder and more powerful than the one she rode in last time. “The other car was the one I bought Janie. She loves Camaros. Hers is an SS, 6.2 Liter V8 Di engine, 455 horsepower and 455 pounds of torque.” He revved the engine a few times before taking off. She literally jerked in the seat, her head slamming against the headrest. “This is a ZL1. It’s a Supercharged 6.2 Liter V8, 650 horsepower and 650 pounds of torque.”
She grabbed the edge of the seat with one hand while her other held the door. “Okay, I get it, it�
�s faster. Slow down.”
“I want to see my girlfriend. So, no.”
She glanced over at him. He didn’t look any different, but she could see the strain in his green eyes.
“Why did she help me?”
“Who?” he asked, not sparing her a glance.
“Janie. Why does she care so much? Logan is her ex, and I’m no one to her.”
He flicked his eyes over to her, then back to the road. “She loves him, and that’s all there is to it.”
Her lungs burned. “Does she want him back?”
“Are you seriously asking me that?”
“Sorry.” She rubbed her chest, startling herself because she forgot her breasts weren’t taped.
“Like I said—don’t care if you’re sorry. Or about anything you say or think.”
God, he was so mean.
“But her feelings for him have nothing to do with you or me,” he said. “Same thing with him. You just have to accept that they’re close if you want anything with him. We did something stupid, and she kept me and Logan from paying the price. She still does. But it was our fault. And it’ll always tie us together—especially the two of them. Their relationship is destined.”
She frowned, pressing her palm harder against her chest. “Destined?”
“Yeah.”
“How do you deal with it?”
He shrugged. “They love each other, and I hate it, but that’s just how it is. I want my baby girl, and she comes with a mutt I can’t tell her to toss back on the street.”
Kylie looked down at her lap as her heart started to bleed. Logan was officially her boyfriend, but she was starting to believe there was never going to be a time when she really had him to herself.
“They’re each other’s first love.” He sighed, shifting gears. “You don’t ever get over that. In their case, they won’t just drift apart. That’s not how any of us work. I’m not going to explain why—just accept there’s more to all of us than you think. I told you, you have no idea what you got into with him.”
“I’ve never believed people don’t get over first loves,” she muttered, staring out the window. Whatever he was trying to hint at was probably something absurd, and she wasn’t going to listen.
“Because you haven’t had one.” He didn’t look at her. “Janie happens to be mine. I just got there second.”
“But you guys seem made for each other.” As much as that irked her, it was true.
“That’s the fairytale way of viewing it.” A slight smile touched his lips before vanishing.
“I just want that. I want to matter.”
“I’m not your friend, so stop blabbing to me. I’m giving you a ride because Janie asked me to.”
Her stomach cramped as she told him, “I don’t have people to talk to.”
“Maybe because you don’t try to talk to anyone.” He rolled to a stop at a red light.
She clasped her shaking hands together on her lap. “It’s not that simple. I was forced to be a loner.”
“I doubt that.” He glanced out his window. There was a patrol car beside them. He flipped off the officer.
The cop just looked forward as Ryder chuckled and took off again.
Fury sizzled in her veins from his comment, and she couldn’t stay quiet. “Are you calling me a liar?”
“I’m saying I see everything.” He sounded bored. “And I never saw anyone holding a gun to your head, forcing you to not talk to the people around you.”
“You never saw me before the fight,” she spat. “And you have no idea why it wouldn’t take someone holding a gun to my head to make me hide.”
He slowly slid his gaze over to her. “I said I see everything. Sometimes it takes me a while to make sense of what I’m looking at, but I always do when it’s time. And you, Blondie, you were the only one keeping yourself hidden under that hood. Try to use the excuse of being afraid of some retaliation all you want. If that were true, you would have run when Trevor approached you. Everyone knows Maura is in love with him, but you had no problem showing your face for him—no problem letting her see it happen either.”
Her breathing quickened. “I showed my face because of Logan.”
“Sure you did,” he said calmly, focusing on the road again.
“You don’t know anything.” She tried to sink deeper into the seat. The air inside the car felt too thin, and she hated that he got to her.
“I know you’ve been getting the shit beaten out of you,” he said like it was common knowledge, “and you let it go on until you had a Grimm to act like a knight in shining armor. I know you wanted Trevor until he shattered your little fantasy of him being a dream guy, but you didn’t care much, did you? Not when Logan Grimm was there, whispering sweet shit in your ear. He probably said you were special—that you were the only girl he wanted—that you weren’t like the others and he wanted to protect you.”
Her breath hitched.
He smiled, and it was the cruelest thing she’d ever seen. “I know he wanted to fuck you, but he slowed down because you’re not eighteen. He checked, by the way—you’re not at risk of getting him locked up because you’re within a three-year age gap. So if he fucks you now, it’s because he’s not scared.”
Her eyes watered, and the air in her lungs was no longer hers. Ryder was taking everything from her.
“I know he saw a bit of Janie when he looked at you,” he added. “He saw a girl who needed a hero. He saw a second chance.” He almost sounded concerned, but she knew better now. “But the only chance he’s hoping for—that he needs—is for a pair of hazel eyes to look at him like he’s the greatest man in the world again.” He stared at her. “What color eyes do you have, Blondie?”
“You’re an asshole.” She turned away from him.
“The truth hurts. Don’t say I didn’t warn you. I am truth. Logan is a lie.”
Twenty-Two
DOUBT
Kevin stood in the foyer with his arms folded over his chest as he watched Lorelei and Maura enter the house.
“Where’s Kylie?” Lorelei asked, setting her purse down.
“With her boyfriend,” he said, watching the two women look at each other. “Her boyfriend who told me she would not be coming home until she felt safe here. Her boyfriend, who is affiliated with the most powerful families in the world, threatened to call the police on me for not protecting her from being beaten with a baseball bat.”
Lorelei gestured to the stairs. “Go to your room, Maura. Do not come out until I say.”
“But—“
“Do as I say,” Lorelei snapped, walking to where Kevin stood.
Maura looked between her mother and stepfather, then slowly ascended the staircase until she was out of sight.
A door slammed upstairs, and Lorelei stared into Kevin’s eyes as she reached for the zipper on her dress.
“Ow,” Kylie muttered, rubbing her elbow where the door Ryder had just walked through hit her. She didn’t even know why she was following him. She should have been walking home. What she was doing was stupid. She was following Ryder even though he’d just ripped her heart out. All she wanted was for him to be a little nicer to her, and he proved he didn’t give a shit about her.
“Lost your way, babe?”
Kylie stopped walking, her eyes widening when a guy stepped out in front of her. He might’ve been a decent looking guy at one time, but his cauliflower ears made him look disgusting, and she cringed when he gave her a broken smile. God, how does Logan stay so good-looking?
“I said, you look lost. Need some help?”
She shook her head.
He took a step closer. “Come on, cutie. Don’t be like that.”
“I’m here to see my boyfriend,” she whispered, trying to move away when he continued to advance. “Logan Grimm.”
“Grimm?” He laughed and kept walking until she was backed up against the wall. “The Reaper doesn’t do girlfriends. Just a half hour ago he had his little hottie Mortaime in his room a
nd her screams bouncing around the whole gym.”
Kylie’s lungs collapsed as he laughed again, driving a rusty knife into her heart.
“Now stop playing hard to get,” he said. “Grimm’s not interested in anything but a hard fuck, and he looked more than satisfied with that little brunette of his.”
Kylie’s lip trembled and tears welled up in her eyes.
“Hey,” came a different voice.
The man turned around to see who had spoken, only to have Ryder’s fist slam into his face before he could say anything.
Screaming, Kylie covered her ears to keep from listening to the sounds of Ryder’s hits against the limp guy’s face.
“Babe!”
Kylie peeked her eyes open, not realizing she’d closed them or crouched down against the wall, as Janie came running toward them. Ryder threw a final punch and stood up, not looking away from the broken guy.
Janie touched his shoulder. “Ryder, look at me.”
Kylie’s chest hurt as her heart pounded fiercely. Not from fear as it had just done, but from anger now that she had her eyes on Janie.
“Where is he?” Ryder asked, growling as he turned to glare at Janie.
“Who?” Janie walked closer, worried as she looked over her enraged boyfriend, but not afraid. “Babe, what happened?”
“Logan,” Ryder snapped, his eyes narrowing on his girlfriend’s confused face.
Kylie was too afraid to move.
Ryder was pissed, and he was ready to explode again. “Did he touch you?”
Both Kylie and Janie flinched from his harsh voice.
But Janie’s frightened look shifted into one of anger and disbelief. “You know better than that.” She stepped toe to toe with him, tilting her head to look up at him as he stared down at her with the most terrifying glare Kylie had ever seen. “Is that what this was?”
“Why the fuck does he still have your picture?” he growled.
“What picture?” Janie’s gaze stayed angry as she glanced at Kylie.
Ryder didn’t answer, he just kept taking deep, angry breaths and clenching his bloody hand.