by Meghan Sloan
Alice nodded, trying not to feel bitterly disappointed. At least he was still coming. She would just have to bide her time until he arrived.
Apart from the fact that she couldn’t wait to see him again, she needed to speak to him about Marina’s unexpected and strange house call. It had been playing on her mind, making her so deeply uneasy that she could barely sleep. She needed his re-assurance that he truly wasn’t having second thoughts about their engagement. That the lady had not wormed her way back into his mind and heart.
“I am afraid I have some bad news, though,” said Nicholas, in a glum voice.
Alice’s heart skipped a beat. “What is it?”
He sighed wearily. “Marina St. George is here,” he said, his mouth thinning into a disapproving line. “There is no way I would have invited her, but Lucy was insistent that she bring a ‘plus one’, without telling me who it was. I agreed out of politeness, but I would have said no immediately, if Lucy had informed me who it was…”
Alice’s heart sank. “You do not need to feel bad on my account,” she said in a small voice. “Miss St. George is returned, and I would surely bump into her somewhere.”
Nicholas looked angry. “Perhaps, but I would not subject you to the lady willingly. She wormed her way into this party.” His eyes narrowed. “The fact that she is even socialising at all, such a short time after her miraculous return, is troubling. One would have thought that she would still be ensconced in the bosom of her family, recovering after her ordeal, and have no desire to attend social events.”
“The lady marches to the beat of her own drum,” said Charlotte in a tight voice. “That much is obvious.”
“Has she truly lost her memory entirely?” asked Lady Langley, looking intrigued.
“So she claims,” said Nicholas sourly. “I ran into her the other day at Wilmington’s house, and she seems as sharp as a tack, in my opinion. The same charming lady, as always.” His voice was laced with sarcasm.
Alice’s eyes widened. Why had Marina St. George been at Silas’s house? Her stomach stirred uneasily. There was more to this than she had been led to believe. She had always known it. It had been there, stirring to life, right from the start. But Silas had assured her that Marina had taken the news of their broken engagement well, and that he had no desire to see the lady again. Why, then, had she called at his home?
“Excuse me,” she said in a faint voice.
Charlotte looked at her sharply, but she ignored her friend. She turned and walked back through the crowd towards the door. All that she needed was a moment alone, to compose herself, and then she would be all right. She felt as though she was in danger of bursting into tears.
But she realised, almost immediately, that she had made a mistake. Marina St. George was coming towards her. She must have been socialising in the other room.
The lady’s eyes widened when she saw her. But without missing a beat she smiled in a most dazzling way.
“Miss Sinclair,” she said, approaching her with outstretched hands. “What a delight to see you again!” She lowered her voice. “And most fortuitous. I was hoping that we could chat, privately. Do you have a moment now, perchance?”
***
Before she could even think of anything to say, to get away from the lady, Marina St. George had taken her arm firmly, steering her to a window seat in the main parlour. Alice’s heart thudded uncomfortably in her chest. Every instinct told her to get away from the lady, but Marina had a commanding way about her, and she simply could not think of an excuse.
She felt eyes on them both as they sat down. Charlotte was gazing across the room, a worried frown on her face. Nicholas didn’t look happy either. And on the other side of the room Lucy Oakley was gazing at them both as well. She had paled and her eyes were as wide as saucers.
“That’s better,” said Marina, spreading out the skirt of her gown around her. “Much more comfortable than standing, wouldn’t you agree?”
Alice nodded warily, her eyes flickering over the lady. She was immaculately groomed, as always. No detail, no matter how minor, had been overlooked. Her gown was shimmering silk, in a pale shade of lavender with embroidered flowers along the hem and the bodice. This evening she had swept up her golden hair into an elegant chignon at the nape of her swan-like neck. Diamonds sparkled in her ears and she wore a matching necklace of diamonds.
She was so incredibly beautiful and poised that Alice felt her heart hit the floor, feeling like a rag woman by comparison. As if she wasn’t fit to touch the hem of Marina St. George’s resplendent gown.
“How have you been, my dear?” asked Marina, fixing those stunning violet-coloured eyes on her.
“Very well, I thank you,” she replied stiffly.
Marina’s eyes trailed over her. “You look simply charming this evening! That gown becomes you well.” She paused, smiling. “You must tell me who your dressmaker is. It is so skilfully made.”
“Mrs. Jagger,” she said slowly. “She has a shop on Milsom Street…”
“Of course,” said Marina, nodding. “I should have known! Mrs. Jagger is one of my good mother’s favourite dressmakers. We have frequented her for years, although some say her eyesight is getting a bit poorly now.” She paused. “But you would never know, looking at your gown. The craftsmanship is impeccable.”
“Thank you,” said Alice, wondering where this was leading. Why was Marina trying to be so sweet? She didn’t believe that the lady admired her gown at all.
Marina smiled again, her cheeks dimpling in a charming way. “I am at a loss, just a little, since my return,” she said slowly. “Lucy is trying, but she is often busy and cannot see me as much as I would like. Perhaps we could have a day out together, on Milsom Street? Just the two of us. We could see Mrs. Jagger, and go to the milliners, and have afternoon tea at one of those quaint tea rooms. What do you say?”
“Perhaps,” said Alice, warily.
Marina’s smile widened. “That’s settled, then! We shall arrange a date soon.” She paused, her large eyes shimmering. “I do hope that we can be friends, Alice. We have so much in common, after all.” She laughed, throwing her head back.
Alice forced a smile onto her face. She simply didn’t know how to respond to that at all.
Marina sighed. “Now that is settled, I must admit there is another reason I have asked to talk with you privately.”
Alice nodded. She had been waiting for this. She felt herself trembling. Resolutely, she clamped her hands together on her lap, trying to hide it. What was she going to say now?
Marina’s eyes suddenly glittered with tears. “Alice, I truly do understand why you are trying to stay in your engagement with Silas,” she said slowly, gazing at her. “He is quite a catch, after all, and I can sense that he has dazzled you. He is such a handsome man, and charming. I am not blind to the fact that a lot of ladies admire him.”
Alice gazed back at her, as steadily as she could muster. “It is not a case of trying to stay engaged to him,” she replied. “We are engaged. He has assured me of his commitment to me, Miss St. George.”
Marina sighed heavily. “I know,” she said slowly. “He has told me too that he is determined to stay engaged to you. He is such a decent gentleman who would never dream of letting down a lady, or hurting one.” She paused. “But he is only doing it out of a sense of duty, Alice. I am asking you, quite humbly, if you would step aside, and be the one to break the engagement with him, seeing he cannot bring himself to do it…”
Alice reddened. “Why would I do such a thing?”
“Because he cannot, and it is the right thing to do,” said Marina softly, almost sadly. “He does not love you, Alice. He only became engaged to you because he desired to move on with his life, after I had been missing so long. He sincerely thought that I was dead, you see, the poor lamb. But he has always loved me fiercely, as I have loved him.”
Alice blinked back sudden tears. She would not cry in front of this woman. She was determined.
/> “Silas and I are meant to be,” continued Marina, her mouth twisting slightly. “I always thought that our love was grand, almost epic, like something the poets would rhapsodise about.” She paused, staring at Alice intently. “That love still burns brightly, Alice. How could it not? We loved each other so well, for so long. How long have you known Silas for?”
Alice’s heart flipped over in her chest. “Six weeks.”
Marina smiled. “Not very long, is it? You are infatuated with him, but how can you claim to love him? There is no doubt that he has determined to make the best of it with you. He has probably claimed to even love you.” She paused. “But you see now, do you not, that he was merely biding his time, trying to make the best of a bad situation? How can a mere infatuation, over weeks, compare to our grand love?”
Alice clamped her hands tighter together. This was everything she had worried about, almost in a nutshell. And while she did not trust Marina St. George as far as she could throw her, there was an awful ring of truth to her words.
She and Silas hadn’t known each other for very long, and for half of that time he had been distant with her, obviously still enamoured with Marina. The whole of Bath knew about the great love affair between Silas and Marina and how heartbroken he had been, how truly devastated when she had vanished. Was Silas only continuing their engagement out of a sense of duty when he truly still loved Marina?
The tears were threatening to spill over at the very thought. Silas was a decent, kind gentleman. It would be the type of thing that he would do, to honour their engagement, even though he still loved Marina and wanted to be with her. And Alice wanted desperately to believe it, to believe that Silas loved her, so much so that she had taken his declaration at face value. Was she about to subject the man she loved to a half-life committed to her when he wanted to be with someone else?
She couldn’t do it, if it were true. She just couldn’t.
“I recently called upon Silas,” continued Marina, in a soft voice. “He claimed that he could not break the engagement with you, out of duty, but the love between us could not be denied.” She swallowed painfully. “We kissed, Alice. Quite passionately. It took all of our strength, to break apart…”
“What?” hissed Alice, staring at her in horror.
“I am not proud of it,” said Marina, looking shamefaced. “And I know that Silas is not proud of it either. How do you think we felt, acting like illicit lovers, when we are meant to be together? That if it were not for his engagement of convenience with you, we still would be together, and planning our wedding day again?”
“I cannot believe it,” whispered Alice. She felt as if she were rooted to the spot, as if her feet were growing into the very floor.
Marina gazed at her sadly. “It is true, Alice. I would hardly admit to such a thing if it had not occurred, knowing the shame it brings to both Silas and me.” She paused. “Please, will you do the right thing, for us all? Let Silas and me marry at long last. You are lovely, and I am sure you will find someone who truly loves you in time. But it is not Silas who is your true love, Alice. And you shall make both of you miserable – condemn you both to an unhappy life – if you keep insisting that he is.”
Alice desperately tried to keep the tears at bay. She couldn’t cry – not here, not now. Later, in the privacy of her bedchamber, she could indulge it, or even in the carriage ride home with Charlotte. But this was a party, filled with people she barely knew, and she had no desire to make a fool out of herself. To become the centre of unwanted attention.
Marina laid a hand over own, still clenched tightly in her lap. “I see that you are holding in your tears, my dear,” she said in a sympathetic voice. “I know how hard this is for you, to hear, and I am sorry I must say it. Believe me, I have no desire to hurt you, and Silas does not want to, either.”
Alice shuddered. Marina tightened her grip, staring at her intently.
“Please, do the right thing, Alice,” she said, her voice catching in her throat. “For all of our sakes. Before it is all too late…”
“I do love Silas,” said Alice, in a small voice. “It is not infatuation, as you claim. I want to marry him, with all my heart.” She hesitated. “But more than that, I want him to be happy. If marrying me will not make him happy…”
Marina’s grip on her hand tightened again. “Oh, my dear. You are so selfless! A true paragon of feminine virtue. I always knew that you would want him to be happy, even at your own expense.” She paused. “You shall find your true love, Alice. I know that it seems now as if Silas is the one, but I can tell you are inexperienced. There is a whole world of gentlemen out there, after all. You just need to explore a little, my dear.”
Alice hung her head, gazing at their interlaced hands on her lap. Her heart felt as if it was about to break clean in two. How on earth was she going to get through the evening? And how was she even going to look at Silas when he eventually arrived?
Chapter 22
Silas gave his hat and cloak to the butler as he stepped into the foyer. He was later getting here than he had even thought. The sound of laughter and chatter drifted out of the parlour.
“It sounds as if it is a fine party already, Freeman,” he remarked to the butler. “Is Miss Sinclair already here?”
The butler nodded. “She is, sir. She arrived with Miss Hayward half an hour ago. I believe that they are both in the parlour.”
“Excellent,” said Silas, already heading towards the room. “Thank you, Freeman.”
He had to dodge ladies and gentlemen who were lingering in the doorway, almost spilling out of the room, as he entered. He nodded to a few, smiling, but didn’t stop. He was so eager to see Alice it was all that he could think about.
He hadn’t had a chance to call upon her at all since Marina’s last visit. His father had commandeered him, sending him away from town on errands to villages in the surrounding countryside almost every day. And he hadn’t had the heart to see her after Marina had left that day. The visit had shaken him to the core, and he didn’t know how he could look Alice in the eye after what the other lady had done to him.
He was still shaken by it. And while he knew that he had been innocent in the situation – that he hadn’t sought or encouraged Marina’s advances – he still felt tainted with guilt. Almost as if he had willingly cheated on Alice with his former fiancée. How he wished he had never let her into the room, or that he had insisted that his mother play chaperone. There was no way she could have done what she did under his mother’s eagle eye. Even Marina could not have found a way.
He sighed heavily. It was too late now to change it. But at least he had made his feelings plain to Marina. He would be on alert with her now as well. If she ever dared to call on him again, he would make sure they were chaperoned. There was no way he would spend even a moment alone with her again.
He scanned the room quickly. Nicholas was in a corner, seemingly engaged in an intimate tête-à-tête with Charlotte Hayward. His friend was leaning over the lady, smiling widely, the full force of his charm on display. Charlotte seemed to be enjoying it, too. She was gazing up at him, laughing, her eyes shining, as she clutched her champagne flute. Silas felt a stab of surprise. It almost looked as if Nicholas was wooing her, and that the lady liked it.
He shook his head in wonder. Nicholas had known Charlotte Hayward forever, and always claimed that she was like a little sister to him. What had changed?
His eyes swept across the rest of the room. Lucy Oakley was here and seemed to have noticed Nicholas’s marked preference for Charlotte, too, judging by the way she kept glancing at them. But she seemed merely curious, like he was, rather than heartbroken. Silas smiled to himself. Who was he to interfere? He was sure they would all work it out to their satisfaction.