Scandals of Lustful Ladies: A Historical Regency Romance Collection

by Meghan Sloan

  She should have moved, pushed him away. But Cassandra couldn’t.

  “Look, Cassie,” Gabriel moved in closer, “I’ve spoken to my brother, and I know when he finds someone he likes. He really likes you, and he’s just nervous about getting it wrong. He can be rather clumsy. I don’t want him to be disheartened if you walk away because he did something wrong.”

  He was far too close. And they were in public. People could see them, and then there would be talk. Cassandra normally didn’t care, and she could stand up for herself. But with Gabriel Tattershall, it was something else. She could already feel herself panicking and she shoved it to one side, fixing Gabriel with a steely glare.

  “If he does something wrong, I’ll let him know. And would you let go of me, please?”

  Gabriel blinked. Then he looked down and saw he was still holding onto her. He let go and stepped back, holding up his hands.

  “Forgive me, Miss Seton. I shouldn’t have grabbed you.”

  “No. You shouldn’t have.”

  They stared at each other. Cassandra knew she should go inside and find Emily. It was safer that way. But she couldn’t. For some reason, she was rooted to the spot watching Gabriel. The man had an ability to draw people to him, and Cassandra had been caught up in it as well.

  She had to get away. This was too much. Cassandra swallowed hard and fumbled for the door handle.

  “I...I’d better get inside. It’s going to start raining shortly. Good...good day.”

  Then she was staggering into the public house. She didn’t care what she looked like, or that Gabriel was watching her. Cassandra only cared about getting away. Emily hurried over as Cassandra reached the counter.

  “Cassie! What is it?”

  “I…” Cassandra was glad the public house wasn’t as full as normal. She didn’t want to be seen in a fluster. She took Emily’s hand. “Can we go somewhere we can’t be overheard? I need to talk to you.”

  “Of course.” Frowning, Emily tugged Cassandra behind her as she headed towards the back of the bar. “We can go to my room. Mother and Father can manage without me for a few minutes.”

  They headed into the living quarters and up the stairs. Emily’s parents would be downstairs looking after the business. The upstairs quarters were barely used on the days the Barrington Arms was open except on Sundays, so there was no worry about being overheard. Unlike Cassandra’s home, which seemed to have someone listening at keyholes if they knew there was someone sneaking around. You couldn’t really keep a secret there.

  And Cassandra was holding onto a secret. One that she had pushed aside during the day while she was busy, but now it was coming back in a way that made her uncomfortable. She didn’t know what to do, and it was gnawing at her.

  Hopefully, Emily would figure out what to do.

  They entered Emily’s bedroom. Emily shut the door and drew Cassandra to the bed.

  “Sit down.” She settled beside her friend as Cassandra sagged onto the bed. “What’s wrong, Cassie? You look like you haven’t slept well.”

  “I...I barely slept last night,” Cassandra stared at the floor. “I just couldn’t.”

  She had been exhausted and the evening had been pleasant enough. But all Cassandra had been able to think about was the brother who hadn’t been present. The one who could make her weak-kneed just by looking at her. The one who could heat her up with just one touch.

  The brother who she shouldn’t be having anything to do with.

  “You’re beginning to worry me now.” Emily squeezed Cassandra’s arm, “What’s wrong?”

  Saying it in her head was one thing. But saying it out loud sounded completely different. Cassandra knew she was going to sound silly, but she didn’t know who else to talk to. She hadn’t planned to come here and talk to Emily about this, but seeing Gabriel just now had turned that on its head.

  She stood and began to pace.

  “I’m so conflicted, Emily. I...I’ve never felt like this, and I never thought it would happen. Now it has, and I…” Cassandra stopped and turned to her friend. “It has to be the wrong person.”

  “You’re not making any sense, Cassie.”

  “I’m talking about Gabriel Tattershall. I…” Cassandra closed her eyes. “I think I’m more than a little affected by him. And it...it’s intense. I’ve never felt anything like it.”

  “What are…?” Emily felt silent. Cassandra opened her eyes to see Emily staring at her. “You have feelings for Gabriel Tattershall?”

  “I think I do.”

  Emily blinked. Cassandra might have got a better reaction if she had hit her friend over the head.

  “I didn’t think you even liked him. I knew you found him attractive, but I didn’t think it would go any further.”

  “I thought the intensity of how I felt towards him was dislike. But it’s not. I’m beginning to realise that now.” Cassandra rubbed her hands over her face. Was she shaking? “And I...I don’t feel happy about it.”

  “I’m not surprised,” Emily shook her head. “I didn’t believe you and he would even get along if left in the same room alone for more than a few minutes. I would have expected one of you to end up with your insides ripped out.”

  “It’s more than that, Emily.” Cassandra went to the little chair Emily had by the window and sagged onto it. “He’s trying to push me onto his brother. I know it’s his doing, and I’m certain that Percy had no idea who I was before last night. It had Gabriel’s handiwork all over it.”

  “Why would he do that?”

  “I’m not sure yet. I’m still trying to figure it out.” Cassandra bit her lip. “But I do know that when I’m around Percy...he’s a nice young man, and he’s very sweet, but there’s nothing. I can’t bring myself to find him attractive in here,” she pressed a fist to her chest. “But with his brother…”

  “You feel it,” Emily murmured. “A lot.”

  Cassandra nodded. She felt like she wanted to cry, but it wouldn’t happen.

  “It hurts, Em. It shouldn’t be happening. I shouldn’t be finding a man like him so attractive. Certainly not after three interactions.”

  “Three?”

  “The last one was outside just now.” Cassandra rubbed a hand over her chest, but it didn’t ease the tightness. “But when he’s around me, I feel like my legs are weak, my heart races and I’m housing butterflies in my belly. I want to go into his arms and not let go. I...I just want a lot from him, and none of it I should be desiring from him.”

  Emily’s expression changed. Realisation seemed to have dawned as to what her friend was trying to say.

  “You’re falling for him.”

  Cassandra looked at the floor. She felt ashamed to admit it.

  “I don’t want to, but I am. It’s a mess, Emily.”

  #

  “What do I do now?”

  Emily sighed and knelt before her friend, taking Cassandra’s hands in hers.

  “You’re going to have to fight it,” she said. “Resist it as much as you can.”

  “How am I supposed to do that?”

  “You’re strong-willed. You’ve resisted other things before.”

  Cassandra snorted.

  “I’ve never resisted emotions of this kind in my own heart before. I’ve been trying, but it’s not easy. And I feel like I’m fighting a losing battle.”

  Emily frowned.

  “Well, you’re going to have to. You and he are not compatible, both socially and emotionally. Your personalities clash, and Gabriel is as close to penniless as you’re going to get.”

  “Being penniless doesn’t mean anything to me.”

  That was the problem. It should have been a big barrier, but Cassandra found that she didn’t care. Gabriel could have been a beggar on the street and she wouldn’t have cared. The man had captured her heart and she was snared completely. She couldn’t get away, even when a small part of her said it wasn’t a good idea and she needed to back off.

  “Besides,” Emily w
ent on, “Gabriel Tattershall is not known for being loyal to women. How do we know he’s been celibate since he was disowned?”

  Cassandra shuddered.

  “I don’t want to think about that.”

  “You have to take it into account.”

  Cassandra knew she had to, and she hated it. She pulled her hands away and stared out of the window. She was feeling more lost than she had done coming in.

  “Even if there is anything returned on his part, it’s only a simple emotion. Nothing meaningful, I’m aware of that. Nothing can come of it. He’ll just seduce me into bed and then drop me.”

  That hurt more than anything. Cassandra had dreamed about falling in love with a kind, chivalric man who would treat her like a princess. Instead, she had fallen for a disowned nobleman with a renowned reputation with women, a former penchant for gambling, and a smile that would make her entire body weak.

  Her father would be furious if he heard any of this. Cassandra certainly couldn’t tell Alice about this, because she would be duty-bound to let her brother know. Only Emily could keep this secret. And a secret it would stay; Cassandra knew nothing could come out of her and Gabriel’s relationship or whatever it was they had.

  She stood and began to pace.

  “Why can’t I feel something for the man who Father would approve of? Why do I have to fall for a rake?”

  “Because life doesn’t work like that, Cassie,” Emily rose to her feet. “It’s never easy. You know that. We have to do as we’re told, but our emotions don’t listen to the rules society lay down for us.”

  She was right, and Cassandra wished she wasn’t. She rubbed her hands over her face.

  “What am I going to do, Emily? I can’t continue to be courted by Percy, and he’s already invited me to a ball hosted by the Duke and Duchess of Suffolk tomorrow night. But all I can think about is wishing his brother was the one who had invited me.”

  Just thinking that felt like an insult to Percy. He didn’t deserve to be uprooted as the man of her affections by his older brother. Unfortunately, Cassandra’s mind had already been made up; Percydidn’t make her feel the way Gabriel did. He never would. Now Cassandra felt immense guilt for him. Percy didn’t deserve that at all.

  Emily sighed heavily and looked away. A look of sadness passed across her face.

  “Emily?”

  “Forgive me, I…” Emily looked up, and Cassandra was shocked to see tears in her friend’s eyes. “I guess I’m getting a little emotional myself.”

  “Why?” Cassandra hurried over. “Talk to me, Emily.”

  “It’s fine. I’m just sad for you and this predicament.” Emily moved away as Cassandra reached for her. She brought out a handkerchief and dabbed at her eyes. “As for Percy Tattershall, you’re going to have to stay in courtship with him.”

  “Why? What’s the reasoning for that?”

  “Because he’s the heir to a viscountcy. He’s the safer bet, and certainly someone your father would approve of.” Emily sniffed and squared her shoulders, “Besides, it was just one meeting. You might find that you feel for him as much as you do Gabriel, if not more. You just need to give it time, have more interactions with him. I’m sure it’ll happen.”

  “Give it time,” Cassandra murmured. She turned away. “I don’t know if I can. Yes, Percy is the safer option for me, and I know I can trust him to be faithful to me. But he doesn’t make me feel here,” she pressed a hand to her chest, “he doesn’t make me feel...whatever I feel for his brother.”

  If her heart wasn’t in it, she couldn’t pursue it. Cassandra had said that before, and she had had no problems telling her previous suitors that it wasn’t working out and she needed to walk away. However, she hadn’t fallen for the older brother. Her heart hadn’t been given to someone else without her realising it. Now Cassandra had found out why she was feeling so off-balance, and she didn’t like it.

  Why couldn’t Gabriel be someone more respectable? Her father would certainly not be impressed by him, seeing as everyone knew who Gabriel Tattershall was. And he would be disappointed with Cassandra for being so foolish with her heart. Cassandra hadn’t planned on giving her heart away. The problem was that her heart hadn’t been paying attention to her.

  And right now, it was telling her to go and look for Gabriel. Tell him the truth, even if it meant rejection. But it was the rejection that stopped Cassandra from doing such a foolish thing.

  She felt stuck in a huge mess, and she hated the feeling. Now she understood why women were told to keep their emotions under control; they were far too unstable.

  “Oh, Cassie,” Emily turned her around and embraced her, rocking her a little as they used to when they were little girls. “It’s going to be fine. We’ll figure this out. It’s probably just a passing fancy. An attraction for someone who’s forbidden, which makes him enticing to you. It’ll wear off.”

  Cassandra hoped so. She hoped it would pass and she would be able to go back to normal. But even as she returned Emily’s embrace and resisted the urge to cry, she knew it wouldn’t pass.

  Chapter 13

  “Mr. Gabriel?” Allen stood in the doorway. “Is there anything else you’d like from me?”

  Gabriel shook his head and gave him a smile.

  “It’s fine, Allen. You can retire for the night, if you wish. Mr. Montgomery and I can manage.”

  Across the table from him, Norman raised his full glass at the valet.

  “Goodnight, Allen.”

  “Goodnight, Mr. Montgomery. Mr. Gabriel.”

  Bowing, Allen left. Gabriel gathered the rest of the cards and shuffled them. It had been a very pleasant evening. Norman had come over for dinner, which Allen had made for them, and then the three of them had spent some hours discussing nearly anything and everything. It was at times like this that Gabriel felt really relaxed.

  His father wouldn’t be impressed that the relationship between his son and the valet was getting stronger to the point they ate meals together and talked like old friends, but Gabriel didn’t care. Derek Tattershall had put them together in a small cottage, and they were practically on each other’s toes. What other situation wouldn’t make master and servant become closer?

  The evening was certainly helpful in putting aside his thoughts on Cassandra Seton. Not much - Gabriel couldn’t completely get rid of them - but Norman’s presence was a welcoming distraction from what was happening. He needed that distraction right now.

  God only knew how much of a distraction Cassandra was. Especially when he knew she was going to be courted by Percy. Percy deserved some happiness and Gabriel wanted to see him happy, but it left a bitter taste in his mouth thinking about Cassandra with his brother.

  You’re only bitter because she’s the one woman you can’t have.

  It’s a lot more than that. So much more.

  “Is it your turn to deal?” Norman asked.

  “Hmm?”

  Norman gestured at the deck of cards.

  “I presume we’re still playing, even if you’re still shuffling them.”