Guarding Hearts
Page 2
Reassured, she turned her thoughts to the upcoming gathering. In some ways, Kathleen considered the assorted types who visited their home to be like a collection. Most were typical, universal additions, while others added rare or uncommon qualities to the grouping. Two of the couples that would be attending tomorrow had been to their home numerous times, and the mix of personalities had provided some lively entertainment in the past. Recently, though, she’d found herself vaguely bored, feeling a kind of predictability settling into the evenings. But the anticipation of newcomers sparked a tingle of excitement that must have inspired her earlier fantasy. During their conversation in the mess hall, Bett Smythe had revealed that Rains was half American Indian, which might account for her looks and her manner. It might further explain why Kathleen found her so alluring. She’d certainly never encountered anyone with that background before. Rains would be a unique addition to any assemblage.
The light went off in the other room. Kat called into the darkness, “Are you coming to bed soon?” as she snuggled under the down comforter her father had brought back on his last trip to Europe before the outbreak of the war. If he suspected who his daughter was likely to lie with underneath it, he’d given no indication. They’d had very little contact with each other for the first years of her life, but she’d gone to work for him once she was old enough. To her mother’s dismay, her father had given her increased responsibility as her knowledge grew, and proudly introduced her as a “career girl” to his friends. She’d cut her protocol teeth on making everything perfect at the various functions his work demanded, and while in attendance at these events she’d cheerfully flirted and danced with his cronies. But when she married a family friend, Theodore Hartley, in yet another desperate attempt to please her mother, she’d known within a week it was a mistake. Probably Teddy knew it too, because after they stuck it out for a year, the divorce was surprisingly amicable.
Back in her childhood home she returned to work, but now the household simmered with tension between her father’s delight at having her back and her mother’s dismay at her failed marriage. Still, her life might have gone on as before had not the war broken out. Before long, men in dashing uniforms were everywhere, and she could have had a date every night had she wished. But the first thing to make her blood race since college was the day a new recruiting poster caught her eye. Predictably, her mother had been horrified when she’d announced her intention to join what was then the Women’s Auxiliary Army Corps, but Arthur Yarrow had defended his daughter’s choice. Unlike many of his generation, he now took pride in her service to her country, though Private Hartley quickly learned a great deal more than the fundamentals of soldiering. When the heat of her first encounter with another woman during her basic training at Fort Oglethorpe in Georgia reignited the unexplained yearnings she’d had since childhood, she understood one reason why every outing with a man her age had left her indifferent, somehow.
“Very soon.” Whit’s voice came from the hallway and then she was leaning on the doorjamb, grinning at Kat’s mummy-like appearance. “Are you cold?”
“Not everywhere. Why don’t you come and find out?”
Less than a minute later, Whit was beside her, naked, her talented fingers starting her off exactly the way she liked it.
“Damn, Kitty, you’re so wet,” Whit breathed, her voice husky in Kat’s ear. “What have you been doing back here?”
Whatever Whit might suspect or even encourage about her fantasies, Kathleen knew what her answer had to be. “Thinking about you, Vic. What else?”
As Whit’s mouth made its way down her body, she willed that to be true.
* * *
Though harshly awakened by the force of her dream, Gale Rains lay completely still. Wherever her nocturnal wanderings took her, she’d begun to accept that she would awaken beside the warm body of the woman she’d given her heart to, and she didn’t want to disturb her. During their first few weeks together, it had seemed like the life she was making with the person she had first met as Private Elizabeth Smythe was the dream, but lately she’d been able to let herself trust in the miraculous beauty of this unfamiliar reality. The differences in her new world at Bett’s house were almost beyond measure. Before the Army, she had rarely known the comfort of a home where the weather stayed out or the security of not having to move every few months, so the joy and passion of a stable, ongoing relationship with a wonderful, fascinating woman was beyond anything she’d ever hoped for.
But tonight she’d been jolted from sleep by the sense of impending danger, some approaching threat, and she’d roused herself to try and understand the warning. Before she could set her mind to work, she let Bett’s steady breathing ease the forceful emotions of her dream-induced visions. She needed a clear head to seek the message and a calm spirit to find her way to the cause. Seeking peace, she found herself contemplating the woman beside her, warm and caring and exceptional in many ways. Despite the risks and the intermittent lies that were necessary to hide the true nature of their relationship, their time together was the happiest of Rain’s life.
And a few days ago, Bett had shown a new depth of courage, bravely revealing a most painful part of her past. Once the story had unfolded, and after she’d been able to let go of her anger, Rain had come to realize that Bett was not merely telling it for the sake of confession, but for them, to build what was between them into something more, something solid and absolutely true. In the hours since then, it had been in her thoughts many times to tell Bett more of her own story. Withholding such a crucial part of herself was not only unfair, the omission suggested a level of dishonesty she could barely stomach with others, and that was utterly unthinkable with Bett. Her mind returned again to the dire warning of her dream. Was this a caution against sharing this worst part of herself with Bett or a sign she needed to speak this truth soon? Seeking clarity should be her first and only consideration, because if the trouble she’d sensed was a danger to Bett and to others as well, she needed to be prepared to take whatever action was necessary.
As if reacting to the urgency of keeping her beloved safe, an uncontrollable tremor passed through Rain, and Bett’s breathing altered. She shifted slightly, turning her body into Rain’s. Hoping to ease her back into sleep, Rain faced her and reached to stroke her hair. Bett relaxed again, but in a few seconds she murmured, “Are you cold?”
Rain delighted in Bett’s voice at all times, but when it was heavy and slightly slurred with sleep…or sex…it made her fierce with longing and profoundly protective at the same time. She wanted to enfold her, to pull Bett so close that there was no space between them and they merged into one, safe and whole. Managing that desire, she answered without moving, “No. Just a dream. Go back to sleep.”
Instead, Bett moved toward her, sliding her leg between Rain’s, bringing their bodies closer. Rain let herself be comforted, marveling at Bett’s mysteriously acquired understanding of exactly what they both needed. Her lips curved up slightly at the little humming noises Bett made as she nibbled at her neck, her hands moving across the hard planes of Rain’s back. After a few soft kisses, Bett asked, “Do you want to tell me?”
No. Yes. Never. Soon. “Not now.”
Bett stroked her chest, then her hand made its way to Rain’s breast. “Then is there something else I can do for you?”
“Uh…” Once, the question of whether she would ever grow inured to Bett’s touch had crossed Rain’s mind. At times like this, she knew she’d been foolish to even imagine such a thing. No other woman had ever gotten past her defenses like Bett had, and now she no longer had the ability or the need to keep her out. Each day brought a deeper communion between them, and as she’d allowed herself to be known, she’d come to know Bett too. Not the feisty, competent woman she showed to the rest of the world, but the tender, thoughtful person who talked with her and listened to her and cared for her in a way she hadn’t appreciated was possible. In her heart, in her spirit, and at times like these, in her body she w
as grateful beyond measure. Even the words I love you, which she’d never said before saying them to Bett, didn’t seem like enough.
Bett shifted them until she was lying on top of Rain, her thigh pushed more firmly against Rain’s crotch. “Could I give you some sweeter dreams?” she suggested playfully, before her voice lowered. “I’m sure I could help you get back to sleep.”
Oh yes. Concerns over the rise of trouble implied in the dream faded even farther away as the closeness of Bett’s body and the promise in her voice aroused her. Even after these many weeks of being together, her blood still raced at the mere thought of Bett, and a look or a touch affected her even more. When Bett lowered her mouth and gently bit her nipple, Rain groaned and arched beneath her. As Bett’s lips trailed down her body, Rain’s heartbeat accelerated. She gripped the sheet, ripples of desire coursing through her when she felt Bett’s breath on the heat between her legs. Any rational thought fled as her entire being focused on the delicious warmth of Bett’s mouth, on the sweet caress of her lips, and on the teasing flick of her tongue. Intent on not pushing herself more firmly against her lover’s face, she almost growled as all sensations suddenly stopped.
“I’m really glad you like this,” Bett murmured, her cheek resting on Rain’s thigh, “because I adore the way you taste.” The tiny puffs of air from her words drifted torturously across Rain’s overheated flesh.
“Bett.” It was part plea, part prayer, and faintly, part demand.
“Yes, Beloved. I know.”
She did know. That had been true even when Rain had tried to deny it, and the notion of someone understanding her that completely had been terrifying only months ago. Now it was a bliss beyond anything she’d ever imagined. As was this. The return of Bett’s perfect pressure on her center uncoiled her desire, elevating the rushes of pleasure inside her to a focus that burst so powerfully, it left her weak.
After a time, she became aware of Bett’s head resting on her shoulder. She swallowed and managed to ask, “You?”
“Tomorrow.” Bett’s lips pressed against her cheek, and she caught a whiff of her own scent. “Get some rest.”
There would be no more nightmares tonight, although Rain’s last conscious thought was that only one thing could transcend the peace of being with Bett. And that would be something else new to her—fear of losing her.
Chapter Two
The weather turned bitterly cold the day before Kathleen Hartley’s dinner party. Bett had been looking forward to wearing one of the three cocktail dresses in her closet, but the temperature—and common sense—dictated she opt for a pair of gray flannel pants with a matching pinstriped jacket over a red satin blouse, in keeping with the holiday season. As delighted as she’d been when her usually solitary lover had reluctantly agreed to attend this gathering, she was even more pleased when Rain appeared wearing the loose-fitting black pants and long-sleeved black shirt topped with a brightly colored vest that Bett had surprised her with the afternoon before.
The vest had caught her eye when she’d made a wrong turn and driven past a western clothing store in downtown Des Moines. It was in the sale window, and Bett could see why. The bright colors made it too girly for a western wear type of man, but the cut was a bit too severe for the average woman—which made it perfect for Rain. The pants and shirt she’d purchased at Yorker Brothers, the department store on the next street over, and she was pleased to see she knew her lover’s body well enough to get the sizes right. This dinner party would be their first time out in public, and Bett was a bit anxious about making a good impression. Rain might understand her concerns to a point, but she would expect to be judged primarily on her conduct, which she believed to be a reflection of character. In a perfect world, she’d be right. But Bett suspected their hostess, like most people of their class, would evaluate them from the outside first, and she was doubtful that the jeans and flannel Rain favored when she was out of uniform would pass Kathleen Hartley’s assessment.
But her main problem had nothing to do with the outfit itself. Whatever else she had yet to learn about her lover, she already knew Rain was proud to the point of being absolutely pigheaded, and terribly sensitive to perceived pity or charity. When Bett had told her there was no rent because she’d bought the house outright, Rain then insisted on paying for all their groceries. Rain cared nothing about her money, which was wonderful, but that mind-set also meant that she couldn’t buy her things for no reason, something she would have enjoyed doing. She thought she’d solved the problem when she presented the outfit as a celebration of their second month of living together. What she hadn’t counted on was that Rain had then refused to accept the clothes because she’d been caught unprepared and had no gift to give in return. As was almost always the case, the disagreement was due to the vast difference in their upbringing—and in their financial status.
Thinking of Rain’s background, Bett had changed her posture, standing with her arms outstretched slightly, her palms up, making it clear she was asking, not telling. “I want to see you in something besides your WAC uniform.”
“You see me in my jeans and flannel almost every night,” Rain countered.
“And that comfortable look is very attractive on you.” Bett meant it, but she also knew that compliments threw Rain off just enough that she might press an advantage. “But I want to see you looking a bit more stylish. And I want us to make a good impression.”
Rain had frowned and looked away, and Bett bit her lip in frustration. She’d definitely taken a wrong angle there. Rain evaluated by conduct, not presentation. It was time for her to act accordingly. She moved quietly until she was barely touching Rain’s body. In a few seconds, she felt Rain relax and her strong arms pulled Bett closer. They moved ever so slightly together, like trees in a soft breeze. Just as Bett was about to relent, having realized it truly didn’t matter to her what Rain wore, her lover offered in a low voice, “I’ll wear it, if it will please you.”
“It will. But not as much as this does.”
“Good. I don’t want what I wear to be more important than what I do.”
“It won’t ever be that way for me, Rain. I promise.”
Even though she hadn’t judged their discussion as technically qualifying as a fight, something had upset Rain to the point that she’d startled awake that night, and Bett had felt her tremble. Rain was so brave and so sure about the rights and wrongs of the world and her place in it that any sign of anxiety made Bett want to offer whatever comfort she could. From the beginning she’d been aware that she was much more experienced than her lover, but being with Rain had shown her there was much more to sex than the quick, casual pleasures she’d experienced in her college years. When Rain looked at her, Bett knew she saw more than anyone else ever had, saw the person she was inside, not simply the daughter of R.L. Carlton or even Sergeant Elizabeth Smythe of the Women’s Army Corps. And when Rain touched her, it wasn’t only for a brief enjoyment of her body, it was to build a relationship between them that was unlike anything she’d ever known. Sometimes it was pure passion, fierce and wild, and the surrender between them made Bett feel completely free. Last night it had been a deeper intimacy, about reassurance and certainty, so real and honest her heart felt like it expanded. That was why she wasn’t terribly worried when Rain wouldn’t say what was bothering her. Her lover was not accustomed to confiding in anyone, and she rarely spoke without careful consideration of her words. But however and whenever Rain came to verbalizing her thoughts, it would always be the truth. And while patience was never Bett’s long suit, she sensed that pushing her lover wasn’t the way to go. It was becoming easier to trust that when the time was right, Rain would tell her everything. And whatever “everything” was, they would get through it together.
* * *
Bett read out Kathleen Hartley’s thankfully detailed instructions as Rains drove. They turned on one very dark dirt road and then another and another. By the time a brightly lit home appeared in the night, even Rains had
almost lost her sense of direction.
They were the first ones to arrive and Kathleen answered the bell, ushering them in out of the cold into a warm den, where a fire was burning. “Don’t you both look nice?” She welcomed them cordially, her eyes lingering on Rains’s braid with an expression that wasn’t only envy, as was the case with most women who’d had to cut their hair upon enlisting. Kathleen’s look was one Bett had seen on the faces of those who felt something entirely different toward her lover. Rains smiled shyly, probably believing the praise was only for her new outfit, but Bett found herself revisiting the stab of suspicion she’d felt the first time she’d ever seen Kathleen Hartley.
She’d been Private Smythe then, a recruit who’d just spent the afternoon in the cryptography class she’d been waiting for since she started basic training. When she’d received a personal invitation to visit their facilities, Bett had looked out into the hall, glad of her drill instructor’s predictable behavior to remain nearby until all of her squad had exited a classroom. Sure enough, Sergeant Rains was there, but rather than simply waiting for her, she was engaged in an animated discussion with an attractive redheaded captain. It was clear the topic wasn’t anything military related, as Rains was gesturing with unusual vigor and the captain was smiling warmly.
They’d been alone at their next squad leader meeting, and the jealous streak she hadn’t been able to control had led Bett to challenge her sergeant about finding the captain attractive. By the end of that conversation, Bett had been moved to admit her own interest in Rains. Not surprisingly, given their roles at the time, her drill instructor had retreated into the distance of military protocol, and Bett could only watch, dismayed, as Rains invited the captain to join her at their next meal where they had another friendly interaction. Bett couldn’t have dreamed the resentment she’d experienced at that moment would turn into the deep and real emotions she now felt for Gale Rains. She’d been powerless then, but that wasn’t the case anymore. She knew what she had, and it was exactly what she wanted. And she had no intention of sharing. After greeting her hostess, Bett took Rains’s hand, brushing a quick kiss over her knuckles, winking when Rains blinked at her in surprise.