Of Different Times

by Agnes Kirkwood

  As the weeks went by Mary would come home with me from the skating on a Saturday night for a sleepover at our house, then next day we’d meet my friends and tour the area. She fitted into my friends as much as I fitted in with hers. We’d play records and jive, have a good old girly chat about boys and rock singers. We would put the world to rights with who we thought was the best rock and roll groups. Elvis was the man then, and that was one thing we all had in common, we loved Elvis Presley and the Jardinières. Time passed so quickly on Sundays when Mary was there, come nine o’clock we’d walk down to the bus stop for the ten past nine bus, then I’d walk back alone wishing for the next weekend to come along

  My mum liked Mary, and when I asked her if I could go and stay at her house for a change, she said she’d think about it. In other words she had to do a bit of Sherlock Holmes first before she agreed. Anyway one of my aunties told her she knew Mary’s mum, and assured her she was a decent woman with a respectable family. So she agreed that when I finished work at the weekend I could go to Kincardine Saturday afternoons and come home on the Sunday. That’s what used to annoy me with my mum she never trusted us to make our own mind up., she always had to get news off Wells Fargo first. Nevertheless I was over the moon, and couldn’t wait for the weekend to tell Mary the good news. She was made up and told me she would take me all around Kincardine and show me all her favourite jaunts.

  In them days we all worked a fifty hour week, Monday till Friday was eight till six, and Saturday eight till twelve. It was funny on a Saturday all the girls used to come to work with rollers in their hair, that was the night everyone went dancing or to the pictures, so in the toilet the main subjects were where they were going and who with, boyfriends, dates, and what they were wearing. I was no exception when it came to excitement thinking of the night ahead, especially the first week of going to Mary’s. As soon as I got home that day I got ready to go to Kincardine where Mary met me off the bus.

  She lived on a housing estate at the top of a steep hill. I was very shy at first, but her mum made me feel really welcome, she was just like mine, full of questions and always watching and listening as if we were plotting something, but I liked her. Her older brother reminded me of my big brother, always bickering and arguing with Mary it was like home from home, so I soon felt like one of the family. Mary took me down the village where we just loafed about and did a bit of window shopping for an hour or so, then went back to her house for some dinner before getting ready to go to the skating. Like my mum as soon as we headed for the door it was the voice from hell shouting

  ‘Remember, in here for ten or I’ll be letting your dad know.’ she was just a replica of my mum. Her dad was the same as mine as well, very strict but probably in a pub that Saturday having a pint with the men. Ten o’clock was the deadline for being in the house in them days. It was the same in ours, any later than ten was a no-no. It was as if you were going to turn into a pumpkin or something. I remember once, we were having such a good laugh and jive down at the café which had a jukebox, we forgot the time, so we grabbed our coats and made a run for it. By the time we ran up that damned steep hill puffing and panting with a stitch in our side we were half an hour late. We were hoping that her mum was in bed, but no, she was always there waiting, as soon as we opened the door the voice from hell shouted,

  ‘What time do you call this, just wait till your dad gets in, I’m letting him know what I’ve got to put up with.’Next day it was forgotten. Not like my mum, she’d take the late minutes off next time, for example if I happen to come in at quarter past ten, next time I had to be in at quarter to ten.

  At six-thirty we headed for the bus stop to meet the rest of the group and catch the bus to the ice rink at Falkirk. They were pleased to see me, It was like old times again us all going in the same bus, giggling and laughing, the boys showing off like they do and us girls giggling at their pathetic jokes. One Saturday when we all met up at the bus stop, there was a strange face there. He was older than us very tall with mousey hair that looked greasy wet because of fhe Brylcreem he had splattered on it to keep it into the DA style.

  The other two girls were all over him, and how he was lapping it up. When Mary saw him she looked disappointed and said in a careless attitude, ‘Oh, your back?’ With that he smiled and stared at me as if to say who the hell are you. One of the lads noticed him look at me and said to him,

  ‘Oh this is Nan she used to work at Kilbagie with us,’ then he turned to me and said,

  ‘This is my brother, he’s been away for a while.’ I could tell by Mary’s face that she was not very pleased at him being there. When the bus came Mary held the back of my coat to hold me back and let them all scramble onto the bus before us. She then turned to me and whispered, ‘Aye he’s been away alright, he’s been in the Borstal for about a year, He’s Kenneth’s big brother, Billy.’ I was flabbergasted because Kenneth was one us and such a great lad, so polite and wouldn’t say boo to a goose. We headed upstairs in the bus to the front row. All the way there he took over the conversation, nobody could get a word in edgeways, not that they wanted to because they were being entertained with his tales and experiences of the past year. I felt like an outsider, mainly because I knew nothing about him or what he had done, and because we were all together Mary couldn’t tell me. I had never been in the company of anyone who had been inside before, and to me Borstal was a prison for underage law breakers, it made me think we had a gangster in our midst. When we all got off the bus at Falkirk, Mary and I lagged behind. She told me he was well known in Kincardine for trouble making, and was sent to Borstal for beating up a lad so bad he was in hospital for weeks. She says if her mum knew he was with us, she would be grounded. I gasped, because I knew if my mum ever found out I was in bad company she would be the same. I had many cousins around this area, so it wouldn’t take long before she’d find out. If that happened it would not only be the end of my weekends in Kincardine, but also the skating for me.

  When we got to the rink, we four girls went to the ladies before we put our skates on. The other two girls were having a conversation about the newcomer to our group.

  ‘Wow! He’s turned out to be a bit of alright, eh?’ Mary looked at me and mumbled

  ‘Aye, he loves himself that one; he fancies his barrow, but he’s no one to push him.’ Mary and I spent the next hour or so on our own skating around the rink, until one of the lads skated up to us and said. ‘Come on you two, we’re all up in the café.’ When we walked into the café I could see our entire group huddled around the table laughing and joking. It seemed the main attraction was Billy making everyone laugh about all the antics that went on in the Borstal. Before the night was out I knew all about him, just by listening to them all talking to each other. I kept connecting him to a convict, and was glad when they announced the speed skating. As we all piled down the steps to the Rink I held Mary back and I can remember saying to her,

  ‘I don’t want to be holding his hand.’ She shook her head. ‘Nor me.’ she said, so we headed for the toilets till it had started. When we came out they were all waiting for us. And guess whose hand I was holding, yes he made for in between Mary and me and held both our hands. When the speed skating stopped we all headed for the seats to let all the dancing pairs on the ice. Billy came over and sat next to me, I went all quiet because I was very wary of him and felt uneasy. He asked me where I lived, I told him, we got talking and I asked what he was in Borstal for, he told me he was in a fight and beat up another chap. He sounded as if he was proud of his accomplishment, and bragged of his victory saying, ‘No one will mess with me again in a hurry.’ I sat there for a full five minutes listening to this so called big man go on and on about himself: God, Mary was right, he really did love himself. I’d just about had enough and blurted out.

  ‘So that’s how you’re a lot taller than your brother, because you feel like the big man beating that fella up. Well it just made you as bad as he is, if not worse, because people like him only go aft
er their own type in the first place to achieve a notch on their belt. Yes it must have made you really big.’ He just looked at me in disbelief and answered.

  ‘Look hen, it’s the cowards that are easy meat for boys who want to prove themselves. Well, let’s just say that fella picked on the wrong coward, eh?!’

  I stood my ground and wouldn’t let it drop

  ‘It takes a man to walk away from trouble and an idiot to go head into it, it’s people like you that give Teddy Boys a bad name.’ He faced me full on and stared into my eyes.

  ‘So you think I should’ve stood there and let that bloody idiot punch me stupid, eh?!’

  I just sat there and couldn’t think of an answer, only that I didn’t believe in Teddy Boys fighting. Everywhere you went you saw them in gangs waiting to fight any other gang who would take them on. But he assured me that he had learned his lesson, and there was no way he was going back in that hell hole of a place. At first I thought to myself what a show off and all I wanted to do was to get on the ice, and was glad when the dancing finished and we all headed for the ice again. That was the last I spoke to him that night, I just tried to avoid him for the rest of the night. When the night was finished we all headed for the bus station. On the bus he was very funny and had us all laughing again with things that happened in the Borstal. It made me think that maybe he enjoyed it in there more than he let on. When we reached Kincardine we all said goodnight to each other. That was the last time I saw him that weekend, because on the Sunday Mary and I went visiting her aunt in Valley Fields with her mum. It was very peculiar because I never gave him a second thought the rest of the weekend, but then every day at work I couldn’t get him out of my mind, even at home when I was supposed to be watching telly, I couldn’t concentrate on the programme I kept going back to arguing with him.

  By the time Saturday came I felt as if I had known him for months. When Mary and I were on our way to the bus stop that night to meet the group I secretly hoped he would be there. He was, and after hoping he was, I stayed away from him nearly all night but when the speed skating came on he asked if I wanted to go and get a cup of tea. Now I loved the speed skate, and couldn’t believe when I said ok. So off we went to the cafe and as we sat having our drink he came right out and said he had been thinking of me all week. My heart just missed a beat, but I never said I had thought of him also. After a couple of hours I agreed to meet him the next day down the village of Kincardine, as it was my turn to sleep at Mary’s, of course all the other gang was also there as we always met in a little cafe and ordered a cup of tea that would last for hours, so we could play the jukebox, which had all the top-twenty records on it. We would spend our time jiving and chatting, mainly about records and singers in the top hits. Sometimes we would all go down to the River Forth and watch the boats. Billy told me that he intended to go back on the trawlers as that‘s what he wanted to do. He seemed to talk a lot about fishing on the boats seemingly he used to go on them since he was a little boy just helping the men whilst they were still anchored in the Forth.

  The weeks went by and things between me and Billy got to the stage that it was officially known to the group that we were girlfriend/boyfriend. I seemed to stop at Mary’s house every Saturday, and come home on Sunday night ready for another weeks work at the factory. When my mum asked why Mary never seemed to come home with me anymore, I told her that there just seemed a lot more to do on Sundays in Kincardine that what there was in Fallin. I think it was because my auntie had reassured her that Mary’s family were well respected and she came out of a good home that she let me stay there in the first place, so she just trusted me and took it for granted that I was quite safe and never queried it any further.

  As the weeks went by Billy took me to meet his mum and dad, I was a nervous wreck, but she was so nice and made me feel at home. His dad never said very much I think he was of a quiet nature compared to his mum, not like Billy who could talk the legs off a table.

  I really liked him and after a few months he asked me why I never asked him to meet my parents. I told him that my mum and dad are not like his and they might not approve and if they didn’t they would stop me from staying at Mary’s every Saturday. He seemed to accept that explanation, that was, until one night my dad was at a meeting the two youngest were in bed and my elder brother and sister was out, so there was only my mum and me in the house. We were watching telly when I got up to make a cup of tea for her and me. Whilst in the kitchen I heard a knock at the door.

  ‘I’ll get it,’ I shouted, but when I opened the door I got the biggest shock of my life. Standing there with the biggest grin on his face was Billy.

  ‘What are you doing here?’ I whispered pushing him further away from view of my mum looking through the hall.

  ‘I’ve come to show you my new motorcycle, I just bought it today and I wanted to try it out,’ he said.

  When I asked how he knew where I lived he gave the answer that made me cringe because his voice seemed loud enough for my mum to hear.

  ‘There was an old chap outside that shop down the road, I asked him if he knew where the Martins lived, and he led me straight to here. Are you not pleased to see me?’ Before I could answer, the voice from inside shouted,

  ‘Who is it hen?’ All I wanted to do then was crawl through a crack in the floor.

  ‘Oh it’s just a pal, mam,’ I shouted. But mum knew it was a man’s voice and she was at that door like a rocket.

  Next moment I realised just how two-faced my mum could be.

  ‘Don’t leave the laddie standing there bring him in,’ she said opening the door wider ‘Come on in son, don’t stand there like a dummy. Nan make this laddie a cup of tea he must be frozen,’ she added.

  I just froze because I knew my mum, she would be all nice with a thousand questions, where do you live, what school did you go to, where does your dad work, aye and a thousand more, there was some of the answers she didn’t like, not that she said anything to him but I got it all in the neck when he had gone,

  ‘For God’s sake lassie you’re only sixteen and he’s nearly nineteen, don’t you think he’s a wee bit too old for you?’ That was just one of the things she gave me earache with. I think she thought I was still the little tomboy she knew, but I thought I was so mature and grown up and she couldn’t accept that. How wrong I was. I never asked Billy to our house again, the reason being my cousin who lived with Gran told my mum on a visit that he knew Billy and that he had been in Borstal.

  Well that was it. when mum came home from Grans that night I had just come home from the bob-hop at the youth club. All hell let loose in our house that night, and I was told I wasn’t to go back to Kincardine at the weekends anymore. As far as I was concerned that was the last straw. I was so head-strong then, I retaliated and put my foot down shouting I was sixteen and old enough to leave home if I wanted. The row in our house that night escalated to the point of my mum nearly in tears. I don’t know if it was anger or she felt she was losing the battle. When dad came in, things seemed to calm down a bit, and talking was a lot quieter. That was my dad all over he seemed to have the knack of turning a screaming match in a calmer way. He very rarely screamed when arguing; not like my mum and me who was probably heard at the bottom of our street that night.

  Everything I said he rejected and told me if I want to ruin my life then the door was there to go ahead, but not to go running to him if things went wrong. I remembered when I lived at Gran’s, and how homesick I was, I didn’t want to risk it again and tried to get through to him that no matter what people have told them my friends were decent and although Billy had been in Borstal for fighting, it didn’t mean that his family were bad, or he was a thief or a gangster, and that he had learnt his lesson and would not get into any more trouble. His mum liked me and I liked her, I shouted angrily that I wasn’t stupid, and if he trusted everyone else before me then maybe it was time to go and see for himself and make his own mind up. I managed to convince him that I knew right from wro
ng and had no intentions of getting into any trouble. All I wanted to do was pick my own friends.

  That seemed to satisfy him to the point that he gave in, but warned me that if I got into the wrong company and brought home trouble, he would give me the biggest hiding of my life; sixteen or not sixteen. Things were left at that and everything quickly went back to normal. No more did my mum stop or even try to stop me seeing Billy, although she kept asking me if I was still seeing him; I think she was secretly hoping it wouldn’t last. I never invited him back to our house again, and he never called, maybe because the motorbike he bought was no more, I never saw it again, nor can I remember what happened to it.

  Things were never better, in fact we got engaged a couple of months later. It all started when one of our friends got engaged, and we decided we would too, there was no going down on one knee, it was more like looking through a catalogue that someone ran at the time, which I cannot for the life of me remember who it was. The following week when I went through, the ring was there, and when we were in the kitchen making a cup of tea, he took it out and he put it on my finger. When we went out with the rest of our friends that night we told them about our engagement; we celebrated at the café with a cup of tea and a good dance around the jukebox. Billy’s mum was pleased when we told her, but when I showed my mum the ring thinking she would be pleased, knowing we were serious with each other. She looked at the ring and called me all the stupid buggers going. I could tell she wasn’t pleased but, I didn’t care what mum thought. I was head over heels in love. All I lived for was the weekend so I could see Billy and my friends.

  One Saturday, Billy met me off the bus as usual, but I had a feeling that something wasn’t right. That night the look on Mary’s face told me I was right, something was wrong. When we were alone she told me her brother seen Billy with another girl through the week. I was shocked, hurt, jealous, and furious all in one. That night I was a bit withdrawn. When it was time to go to his mum’s that night, I told him I was going home. He was shocked and asked why. I was very angry and couldn’t keep it to myself any longer: although I promised Mary I wouldn’t tell him who told me, he guessed, and we had a big argument over it. He managed to convince me that there was no truth in it, and I changed my mind and went to his mums with the promise that if I ever found out that he was two-timing me it would definitely be all over. Everything seemed to be back to normal; in fact it was better, it was as if he was proving to me that he really cared about me and that I was the only girl he was interested in.